


Mission Voyager

by soulmatecest



Series: Voyager!Verse [1]
Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Alien Jensen, Bottom Jared, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Human Jared, Hurt Jared, Jealous Jensen, M/M, Mentions of Suicide, Mentions of Violence, Minor Character Death, Physical hurt/comfort, Possessive Jensen, Protective Jensen, Science Fiction, Slow Burn, Suicidal Thoughts/Idealization, Top Jensen, pinning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-17
Updated: 2016-08-17
Packaged: 2018-07-29 20:28:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 130,361
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7698322
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/soulmatecest/pseuds/soulmatecest
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Earth has been colonized by a non-violent and pacifist race of aliens who have the ability to morph their bodies to look like humans and be able to live on this planet. But they believe real humans to be too violent and dangerous to keep around. It has been almost two years since Jared Padalecki ran to hide with a group of survivors, living in abandoned buildings and stealing supplies to survive.</p><p>But one night Jared is forced to go down to the nearest city when essential provisions are running low; yet it only ends in a disaster when they are almost caught and Jared has to pull a risky move to escape. It is right there, that Jared—sick, hurt and terrified—finds himself face to face with Jensen, an alien who works as a healer and has always felt a deep interest for the humans he was forbidden to ever meet.</p><p>When Jensen’s newly human body starts to develop all the “bad” emotions they were warned about since the moment he meets Jared—such as desire, possessiveness and all-consuming love—he has a hard decision to make: help Jared survive on a planet that not longer belongs to humans or report him to the Security Division so Jared is taken away before he can change everything Jensen is supposed to be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The monster is alive! 130k words for Big Bang and maybe a year or so of planning later and it's all finally here, I'm pretty excited and emotional about this story because I have been thinking about it for so long, it's almost incredible to see it all ready to go. I love Sci-fi and I'm happy I could mix it with my other big love: Jared and Jensen falling for each other in endless AUs. I hope you guys get to enjoy it as well, if anyone gets to like this story even one percent of how much I loved writing it, I'll be happy for ever. It's also my first time writing Sci-fi so I have to admit I'm quite nervous about it and tried to do as much research as possible, but if there are still mistakes here and there, I hope you can forgive me.
> 
> As an additional note, you can find a playlist of the story [HERE](https://open.spotify.com/user/soulmatecest/playlist/7lPhMbOf0Xj0NJMjr0X3Qf). Hope you enjoy it! I have to admit I'm pretty proud of the playlist. And [HERE](http://possessivejensen.tumblr.com/tagged/voyager!verse) you can find my voyager!verse tag on tumblr.
> 
> The entire notes of the story and the LJ masterpost are [HERE](http://soulmatecest.livejournal.com/24679.html), along with my long list of thanks for everyone who helped with this story. Tons of love to quickreaver for her WONDERFUL art, that you can find [HERE](http://quickreaver.livejournal.com/141402.html) and should definitely check out, she's an art goddess. Also, thank you to Elenya for being an amazing Beta Reader who helped me to no end with this story and to Belle, for being the most perfect best friend in the world and helping me make some sense out of this Universe. 
> 
> And finally, thanks to anyone who decides to sit down and read this story. Anyone reading this fic will make me happy from here to the next galaxy, and I do hope you'll enjoy it.

 

_“Even if we never reach the stars by our own efforts, in the millions of years that lie ahead it is almost certain that the stars will come to us. And when the first contact with the outer universe is made, one would like to think that Mankind played an active and not merely a passive role—that we were the discoverers, not the discovered.”_

—Arthur C. Clarke, The Exploration of Space, 1951

 

 

—Part One—  
(Jensen)

 

  
  
  
“So, Jensen, how does it feel to live on Earth so far?”  
  
Jensen smiles. He’s still attempting to wrap his head around the concept of a smile alone. A physical indication of happiness and comfort, a way to communicate one’s feelings, the movement of seventeen muscles to say something with an action instead of words. Jensen has visited more than ten planets through the universe and the human body is the only one capable of doing such a thing.  
  
Jensen very good at learning what it all means, yet putting it in practice is always harder. He does it anyway, because it means something good. He’s not sure if he feels the smile—so many human books, from scientific essays to romantic novels, say that you’re supposed to feel the smile—but he gives it a shot.  
  
“It’s nice. I like it.” He says with a nod. Jensen has been on earth for almost a year now.  
  
A _year_ in human conception, of course, 365 days would never be considered a year for Jensen’s species, but usually when they land on a new planet it’s customary to take on all the inhabitants’ policies and manners. It makes it easier to get used to the change.  
  
Jensen found a very interesting saying in a history book about that idea. _When in Rome, do as romans do._  
  
Seems like humans used to think the same way Jensen’s species does.  
  
Shifters. That’s what Jensen’s species would be called, or at least that would be the word when roughly translated to English. He has always thought it sounds so crude when you say it that way, but then again human languages are very rudimentary and they lack thousands of words and meanings he would be able to find in his own language, so that’s the closest they ever got to an accurate translation. Jensen is a shifter.  
  
Well, actually, right now he’s a human. The reason why they are called ‘shifters' is because their DNA has the capability to mold and change itself in a way that allows them to alter their entire bodies to look like any living creature in the universe, which is what has allowed them to travel and live through different galaxies and planets since the beginning of times.  
  
For the humans though, he was alien. A being from another world, also called an extraterrestrial sometimes.  
  
Such a vague term. There are thousands of beings from other planets and they are all different. They are not all shifters like Jensen. It is almost a little offensive. Not like humans ever knew much about how vast space is anyway, always too busy thinking they were the center of the universe to understand there had been much more out there all along.  
  
“That’s such a basic response,” Danneel clicks her tongue, giving him a fond look. She’s Jensen’s accommodator, that’s her job here on Earth. She helps shifters get used to their new lives on the recently acquired planet. She helps their kind get located in a new home, choose a job, meet other shifters with same hobbies or interests, solve any kind of questions or problems they might have and also keep an eye out on them to see how they get used to their newly shaped bodies.  
  
The last one being the most important one. Because human bodies are different.  
  
“It’s also true, Earth is really nice. And interesting,”  
  
Jensen is not new on the planet, of course, but he still gets visits from his accommodator every other month. It’s a requirement and also a precaution. Even for him, a healer who works at the local hospital helping other members of his species change into their new human bodies and treating their anatomical problems and possible diseases. Jensen could be considered an _expert_ on humans since he has been studying them even before his people colonized the Earth.  
  
Danneel leans in, playing with a pen between two fingers and giving him an interested look, wanting him to elaborate. Jensen sighs, rolling his eyes—another human trait, one he likes much better and finds entertaining to test—and giving her another smile. Her being around is basically a formality, Jensen doesn’t need an accommodator. He knows everything there is to know about humans, from every name of the bones to the way the chemicals in their brains work. He would be first to know if there was something wrong with his human body, Jensen would recognize all the symptoms right away.  
  
But they all have an accommodator. Even Danneel herself, she must have another shifter in charge of making sure her life on Earth is the most pleasant and safe experience.  
  
“I read a book the other day in the library two blocks from here. It was a children’s book,” Jensen explains, leaning back into his chair. “I don’t even know how I came by it, I was looking for an anatomy book I read some time ago but instead I found it there, in the science section. I guess someone misplaced it.” Danneel likes it when Jensen talks a lot, especially because usually he doesn’t talk that much. The more details he gives, the bigger her smile gets. Jensen guesses she does feel the smile.  
  
Sometimes Jensen wants to ask what it feels like, but it worries him that she will take it as a bad sign.  
  
“What is it called?” She writes something down on the notebook in her lap.  
  
“The Velveteen Rabbit,” Jensen answer after a second. “It’s about a stuffed animal. A stuffed rabbit owned by a little boy and the rabbit wants to be real. A vague summary but that’s basically it.”  
  
“So, like Pinocchio?”  
  
Jensen gives her a puzzled look and Danneel laughs, shaking her head. “It’s a kid’s movie I saw the other day. I’m also the accommodator of a family who has a little girl and she was watching it while I was talking to the parents. It doesn’t matter. Why did you find the book interesting?”  
  
“Humans have a lot of imagination. I quite like when they give unanimated objects their thoughts and emotions. Like a reflection of themselves.” Especially because of their emotions. That’s the thing with the humans, their emotions, the huge reason why more and more shifters want to come to Earth and change their DNAs to look like a human’s. Why accommodators need to know if the new shifters on Earth are properly handling their human bodies. It’s all about the emotions. “I think that’s interesting. It was a sweet story,”  
  
“I bet,” Danneel writes down something else on her notebook. “What was the end of the book?”  
  
“The rabbit always felt real because the little boy loved him, but in the end, he became real.” But it had a twist Jensen didn’t expect. The velveteen rabbit wanted to become real but to achieve that he had to lose the little boy that he seemed to love so much. It was a strange topic for a kid’s book.  
  
The concept that you can’t have everything you want and love, that to win something you also have to lose something in return. That’s a very common human logic, sad and extremely dramatic, but still. He finds it curious.  
  
Everything about humans is so… interesting. Even their children’s books.  
  
Too bad everything about them was also deadly, violent and self-destructive.  
  
That’s the main reason why shifters decided to colonize the Earth, something Jensen’s species had never done before. They don’t take planets as their own, they live in peace with the current inhabitants and cohabitate and mutually learn from each other.  
  
But it was all different on earth. All because of the humans.  
  
The humans and their deadly, violent and self-destructive emotions.  
  
Danneel’s alarm goes off, pulling Jensen out of his thoughts and making her stop writing on her notebook. It’s nine o’clock and the usual hour-long visit is over. They spent most of it with Jensen explaining to her the new assignments he had been working on at the hospital, which was good, he’s always much more talkative when it’s about work.  
  
Today it wasn’t so bad thanks to the rabbit with mirrored human traits.  
  
“Okay then, everything seems in order,” Danneel takes a last glance at her notes before closing the notebook and giving Jensen a kind expression.  
  
She’s what humans would call _beautiful_ , Jensen thinks when he looks at the soft lines of her features and perfectly shaped lips. Granted, humans and shifters have a very different conception of beauty. While the previous inhabitants of the Earth had some kind of beauty standards and—for what Jensen can imply from human books and movies—they used to see beauty like a bingo card, where the person would only be considered attractive if they filled certain aspects. Weight, height, proportions of certain body parts, eye color, nose shape, and so on.  
  
For shifters, there are only a few things in life they don’t find beautiful.  
  
Traveling through space for thousands of years and meeting different planets and creatures gives you a different conception of life itself and everything that surrounds you. Humans, of course, were encapsulated in their own narcissistic and egocentric existences, so Jensen guesses it makes sense, somehow, for them to have such strange beliefs.  
  
Danneel on the other hand, she seems like she would have met all of the humans’ standards and be considered a breathtaking sight. She is quite lovely. Jensen looks at her face and thinks that he can recognize and list all the features that makes her so beautiful, but he can’t feel anything beyond that.  
  
No attraction, no speed of his heart rate. Not even a little flutter in the middle of his chest.  
  
Before traveling to Earth after learning and studying humans as much as he could, Jensen was warned that the human body was probably the one with the highest range of responses and feelings they had even morphed themselves into. He was told that shifters who had not found their life partners yet would experience much more intense attraction and compatibility towards other shifters once they changed their DNA to ‘become human’.  
  
So far, a year later, Jensen doesn’t think it’s really all that much.  
  
“You know the usual warnings: if you feel anything weird you have my number, make sure you get enough hours of sleep even with the extra work you have at the hospital now—”  
  
“Danneel, I’m a healer. I know,”  
  
“Yeah, yeah. Just humor me and nod along, I have to say this to everybody,” Danneel chuckles and the sound is delightful. That’s something Jensen quite likes about human bodies, that sound they make when they are so happy or find something so funny that they laugh. Danneel seems to do it quite often and about things Jensen doesn’t find that amusing himself. She is just more cheerful than him, it seems, and Jensen can probably count with both hands the times he has actually laughed out loud on Earth. “You’re in perfect shape. Obviously, you’re a healer, you know how to keep healthy. And your work is also going amazing, I talked to your boss and she adores you.”  
  
Jensen keeps himself from commenting _we all adore each other, that’s who we are_. That’s what makes shifters who they have always been, it’s part of the pure core of their species since the beginning. Shifters only experience and feel goodness, raised and taught from their ancestors that the future and success of the universe was based on peace, understanding and union. They are a violence-free species. They do not believe in hatred and reject the idea of hurting any life form or cause any kind of pain. The base of their society consists of sharing their advanced knowledge with their own and also with all the other inhabitants of the galaxy, going from one planet to another to share and learn and live in peace.  
  
Which means all shifters like each other. They do not feel hate, jealousy or disdain for anything or anyone. Of course Jensen’s boss adores him. Just like she adores everyone else. But it would be impolite to point that out, so Jensen doesn’t say anything.  
  
“It seems like you haven’t made many new friends so far though,” Danneel clicks her tongue, like she seems disappointed.  
  
“I have plenty of friends. I get along with all my co-workers. And my neighbors.” He has lunch with all the other healers from Monday to Friday at the hospital and last week there even was a BBQ to welcome a new couple down the street. They had just passed the testing time and were located in the neighborhood by another accommodator who wasn’t Danneel. During the little party Jensen learned that they had been living on Jupiter before moving to Earth and they were both going to be high school teachers.  
  
“I know, but you never seem to have anyone around other than a coworker or a neighbor.”  
  
Society is very important for shifters.  
  
Caring for each other, helping each other, it’s all part of their basic beliefs. They all love and worry for each other deeply, even for shifters they have never even seen before. They are united as something stronger than common friendship; they are all the same and they are all come from the same planet, born under the same violet sun and raised by the same unconditional love of their elders. That’s why Jensen understands the reason why it would be really important for Danneel to see him have closer friends by this point.  
  
They are all, somehow, friendly to each other, but of course you’re ought to make stronger bonds with some of them.  
  
That’s what Jensen is missing..  
  
“I’m a little shy, you know that,” he shrugs, and she gives him a friendly smile before reaching over and patting his hand gently. That’s partly true, but also Jensen has never been that good at becoming close to others. There’s nothing wrong with him, he just likes being on his own. He likes to lock himself inside to read about work for hours and really enjoys when it’s quiet and he can do whatever he likes in silence. He’s not a loner, but he enjoys being alone. Is not a very common trait among shifters, but it happens.  
  
“Besides, my friends Tom and Mike are moving from California in about a month and you’re going to see them here for sure next time you visit. I met them on a planet in the Andromeda Galaxy a long time ago so I have known them for a while,” If Jensen thinks about it, they are probably the only ones he can actually call friends. Danneel doesn’t need to know that part though. “Mike is out of his mind, he’s going to make you laugh until you cry. And Tom can cook amazingly no matter what planet it is, I’ll invite you to dinner when they get here.”  
  
Danneel chuckles, getting up from the sofa and giving Jensen the cue to stand up too.  
  
“Good to hear! That’s great, Jensen. So you can go have fun instead of working all the time,” She taps on her button nose twice before giving him a wink. “I know you’re the best healer in all of Texas, I even dare to say the best in the entire country, so you must be really busy.”

Jensen is flattered, smiling in return. But again, he doesn’t completely feel it. It just seems right to do it. “But you also need to rest and give yourself a break, alright? Go out with Tom and Mike, or think about going on vacation. I accommodate this one girl who went to Hawaii last month and the pictures she showed me it look beautiful. I’m even thinking about going there myself next summer.”  
  
She gathers her stuff as she keeps talking. Her pen, notebook and a big white purse that matches her white high heels. She slings the purse around her right shoulder, fixes her hair with both hands quickly and leans in to press a warm kiss on Jensen’s cheek.  
  
“I know you’re tired of seeing me around asking about your days—”  
  
“Of course not, Danny. You’re always welcome here.”  
  
“But is something we all have to do. Just in case.” She waves a hand in the air to make it sound unimportant, but they both know is way more serious than 'just in case’.  
  
She needs to check on him periodically to make sure Jensen and all the other shifters she accommodates are not starting to experience all the bad emotions that come with the human bodies. The extra package nobody asked for but comes in with the order anyway.

It’s all about humans and their emotions.  
  
“Sometimes even I think ‘Oh boy, again? I’m perfectly fine!’ when I get my own accommodator appointments. I know it gets boring sometimes, but it’s like going to the healer for a general checking every other month to make sure we don’t have the flu or any other sickness,” Jensen nods, understanding the comparison. “Your next appointment won’t be for maybe two months. So enjoy the lack of me, mon chéri.”  
  
She pronounces the words in perfect French, pulling another friendly smile from Jensen.  
  
He hasn’t tried to learn any other human languages since he arrived on Earth. It wouldn’t take him long, his Mother Tongue is a dialect so much advanced and complex that it covers all of human languages, making it pretty easy to learn them.  
  
During conquering times, shifters decided to establish English as the official language they would all speak there—again, they like to keep as much of the already established customs by the inhabitants of each planet they visit, even if this time they couldn’t cohabitate with them—but Jensen has heard that many shifters really enjoy learning other commonly used human languages. It’s like a hobby.  
  
“You make me sound like such a cranky old man,” Jensen jokes, walking Danneel to the door of his assigned house. He doesn’t quite think of it as home yet, but that’s fine. When he was still living in the Andromeda galaxy it took him almost ten years to think of the place he was living at as something close enough to being called _home_.  
  
“Hey, you said it, not me.” Danneel winks at him, chuckling as she closes her coat and let's Jensen open the door for her. “I’m counting on that dinner. Give me a call when your friends get to town. Who’s their accommodator again?”  
  
“I have no idea. They had one back in California, I guess they’ll get another one assigned once they move here,” Every single one of them needs an accommodator after all. This is something that just happens on Earth though. Usually, on any other planet, you would just have someone help you get used to the new body for a couple months, and then you would be on your own.  
  
“Maybe I’ll snatch them up for myself if your friend cooks so well,” Danneel gives him one last big smile before turning on her heels to walk to the black car parked in front of Jensen’s house. She mentioned something about having another appointment after being done with him so she’s probably heading there now.  
  
Jensen closes the door and is a little ashamed to feel relief.  
  
He sighs contently, turning around with his back pressed to the door. Another accommodation appointment done. Jensen would lie if he said he isn’t thankful it’s over, and well, shifters never lie.  
  
There’s nothing wrong with Danneel. She has been an amazing accommodator since the day Jensen’s testing time was over and he was approved to start his life on Earth. She’s very patient with his lack of social skills and doesn’t mind when he doesn’t have many things to share beyond work. Danneel understands Jensen is not the most cheerful shifter out there, which he really appreciates.  
  
It just feels good to be able to close the door and be all alone again. Now he can go back to maybe finish the book he was reading before she got there or cook himself some dinner while maybe watching a movie.  
  
Jensen taps on the device on his right wrist, activating the screen that then proceeds to project a small hologram with the current time, weather and local temperature. Jensen scrolls past them, activating the voice control system.  
  
“Turn on living room TV. News, please.”  
  
He steps out of his shoes now that Danneel is gone and walks over to the kitchen, passing through the rather big living room as the TV in front of the couch turns on and switches channels on its own, finally stopping on the local news. They are all happy news, of course. Trivial news about how many shifters landed today on Earth for tourism or vacations and how many are planning to stay. News about how the weather is currently on Neptune and reminders of how to apply with your accommodator to get a pet if you want to take care of one. As a species who cares deeply for all life forms, you have to be qualified and trained to take care of a dog or a cat if you wish to have one.  
  
Jensen likes the white noise in the background while he cooks. He never pays special attention to the information about more parts of the ocean being completely cleaned thanks to their far more advanced technology—allowing them to fix all the environmental mess the humans have left behind—or any of the other wonderful news.  
  
Earth has almost been completely cured. The global warming stopped, all animals in danger of extinction are now safe and their numbers are increasing. The polar caps aren’t melting anymore, there’s no droughts anywhere and everything seems to be fine for the third planet from the sun.  
  
That’s what shifters do. They go to one planet to another sharing their knowledge and technology to help others fix any problems they might have. They are also fairly advanced in medicine, which has allowed them to help other beings in the galaxy with different illnesses. In return they only ask to live in peace with the current inhabitants of each planet, to learn from their cultures, share knowledge and live together as friends. That’s all they want. The pureness of sharing and caring for everything and everyone, to ensure a happy and peaceful existence in all of the galaxy.  
  
Humans didn’t want that.  
  
Humans with their wide range of emotions and violent instincts would have never allowed shifters to cure the earth they were slowly murdering, only causing a war that would have harmed the planet and hurt themselves in the process.  
  
“Today the last dumpster in Texas was completely cleaned by our friends from the _Cleansing Division number 45567_ , who were happy to announce the contamination numbers presented during _Human Times_ have completely dropped. Their leader, Samantha Smith, former Jupiter shifter, is here to talk to us about the process—”   
  
The cheerful blonde woman talking on the news rambles on as Jensen opens the fridge and tries to decide what he wants to eat before he’s going to read in bed.  
  
Tomorrow he has a long day at the hospital, with three in-vitro fertilizations and almost ten shifters who are going morph into their human DNAs for the first time. He has some general checkups with patients who got all their shots applied last week and need to come back to make sure they are taking effect. He’ll probably not come back home as early as he did today, so Jensen will need as much sleep as possible.  
  
A light dinner then. Something that will let him have a nice and long sleep. He takes two eggs and some vegetables out of the fridge and activates the device on his wrist again, mumbling “Turn TV off,” before going back to his cooking task. He already heard the leader of the _Cleansing Division number 5543_ talk on the news a month ago about the same thing more or less, he’ll hear some classic music instead.  
  
Something else Jensen quite likes and finds interesting about humans. Their music. Sometimes music makes Jensen feel more than any of the interactions he has had with other shifters on their human bodies on Earth.  
  
Not that he has such a big room to compare, human emotions don’t seem to be so kind to Jensen anyway.  
  
The good ones, of course.  
  
Shifters are expected to alert their accommodators and even local members of the _Safety Division_ if they ever experience any of the dangerous human emotions, so action can be taken into consideration immediately.  
  
As his stereo starts playing a piano piece while Jensen starts chopping off the ingredients for an omelet, he has no idea that if he had left the TV on a couple minutes longer he would have heard the sudden emergency news reminding all shifters to lock their doors and keep an eye out for anything strange if they are living in the west side of the city.  
  
Nothing was confirmed yet, but calling the _Safety Division_ in case of emergency was a priority as much as staying away and clear off danger. The _Collectors_ would be working with the local _Safety Division_ and waiting for calls to take care of any risky situation.  
  
There had been a possible human sighting in Dallas.

 

  
—

 

  
  
Jensen Ackles, Healer and Human Specialist. Health Division.  
  
_Jensen_ is a rough translation of his original name into the human language and _Ackles_ is a random choice for a last name he got assigned when he landed on Earth. Because shifters like to keep the customs of the inhabitants of all planets they live at, keeping the use of last names was something they implemented since the start. It really means nothing to Jensen beyond an easier way to identify himself. For what he knows it has a deeper meaning for humans, about family and personal history, it reminded them where they came from. For shifters, everyone is like family, they all come from the same planet, and there’s nothing else beyond that. They are all equals, so holding the same meaning that humans did for their last names wouldn’t make sense. It’s just for organization and systematization purposes.  
  
Healing is his profession. Jensen has been a healer on all the different planets since he was old enough to learn and study from the elders. Their technology and advanced knowledge in science has allowed them to cure all diseases that they or any other species encountered. So far, there’s nothing they haven’t been able to cure within months or some years of studying. Even sicknesses that would be considered incurable on Earth, like cancer, is something that healers like Jensen can take away in only a matter of weeks.  
  
Jensen likes being a healer, probably one of the things he likes most about himself. It gives him great comfort to be able to take someone’s pain away. As shifters they all were taught compassion and deep care for all life forms, so it only makes sense for him to hold his healer profession so close to heart.  
  
Although, sometimes Jensen thinks there is more to it than simply his innate abilities, less than something that came along in his nature and more of who he is. Like he was meant to become a healer. Maybe if he was born a human he would have been a doctor.  
  
That’s why they invited him to come to Earth.  
  
Shifters usually get to choose which planet they want to go to, taking that decision is influenced by the type of weather and conditions you’ll find on each planet, how you are going to look when your DNA molds into the form of the natural body of the species that live on the planet that you choose, what exactly you can do on each of those planets as well and much more. Everything counts into the decision.  
  
There’s a planet in the Ursa Major constellation where everyone is basically a walking plant, and the shifters change to become something that resembles flowers that are ten feet tall. They sit to enjoy the light coming from the four suns, feeding like a plant would through photosynthesis. That’s all they do there, eat and sleep under the sun non-stop.  
  
Jensen stayed on that planet for almost five years before deciding to move somewhere else because s relaxing and peaceful as that lifestyle was, he was starting to die of boredom out there.  
  
So, usually the shifter picks what they want to do and then they go to the planet they choose, no questions asked or permissions needed.  
  
Except for the Earth. This the only planet in the entire universe that sometimes doesn’t allow shifters to come in or to stay.  
  
They asked Jensen to come, though. He wasn’t in the first wave of his species that came around when humans were still inhabiting this planet, of course not. He wasn’t part of the ones who colonized the Earth and made sure to lock all the dangerous and violent humans away. Jensen came around when that part was over and a lot of shifters were already being allowed to come test life on earth.  
  
However, he was asked to study humans before coming here.  
  
Jensen was lucky enough to learn about healing from one of the most renowned shifters they ever had, his grandfather. Being able to change their DNA allowed them all to live very long lives, ten times of what a human could live, maybe even more. Jensen’s grandfather had been a healer for thousands of years and he was happy to pass all his knowledge along to Jensen before he passed away.  
  
So if Jensen was a good healer at all, it was all thanks to his mentor.  
  
Travelling across so many planets and being somehow recognized as a good pupil from one of the best healers they ever had, made Jensen some kind of famous amongst his species. He still isn’t completely used to shifters recognizing who he is by only hearing his name and upon learning who his grandfather was. I’s kind of bizarre, but sometimes it has its good parts. Like being asked to be a healer on a new planet that has been colonized, receiving complete access to material and knowledge about the creatures that used to live there and being granted permission to stay right away when shifters were being more meticulous than ever about who could come to live on Earth.  
  
Jensen was more than flattered when he received the news about the invitation.  
  
After accepting, he started receiving all the information he could possibly dream of about humans. He was supposed to study them, learn about their anatomy and how their biology worked. From their evolution to every modern sickness. Jensen was supposed to know everything in the human body, from how the neurons in the brain work to how to make a heart transplant. He learned how the human body functions from head to toe and how to cure anything that any Shifter might contract once they change their DNA to obtain a human body.

For him, it had been fascinating. The reason why Jensen still likes to travel and meet different planets so much is because he loves learning about every unique species in all the distant galaxies. He loves learning not only about their anatomy and biology, he’s also interested to know how they behave, how their minds work, what makes them who they are. Being a healer has always allowed him to study it all.  
  
There was just one problem with learning about humans: Jensen had never had the chance to see one. A real one. .  
  
He was used to study about different creatures from reading books as much as from directly interacting with them. There was no better way for a healer to learn, that’s something his grandfather always used to say. For them to be compassionate and love every life form in the universe they had to see them as equals, they had to learn directly from them, they had to care for them. That way they were able to cure and help them even more, because they would have that connection. It couldn’t all come from only books and notes on computers.  
  
But that couldn’t happen with the creatures who used to live on Earth before the shifters got there.  
  
Humans are extremely violent, that’s the first thing Jensen got told when he tried to question not only why he couldn’t establish a closer relationship with them to learn about their species but also why the shifters were colonizing an entire planet when that was something so unusual for them. Humans are violent and self-destructive. They are evil. For thousands of years they have been destroying the Earth and each other. War after war, corruption, murder, hunger, endless pain. Humans are not capable of any kind of mercy or compassion to anything or anyone.  
  
It wasn’t that hard to believe with just seeing a simple newspaper from the Earth. A father murdering his entire family and then killing himself. A mother drowning her two daughters in the bathtub. People dying of hunger and malnutrition while the people with sufficient money completely ignored such suffering. Segregation and torture of groups and communities for the religious beliefs, race or sexual orientation. Civil wars. World wars. Nuclear weapons. Mass murdering. Child abuse. Rape. Slavery. Torture. Pain.  
  
So much pain. Endless amounts of suffering and not a bit of regret or empathy.  
  
Jensen never felt more sick thinking that someone could behave and think the way humans did. In all the millennia that shifters had been travelling through the universe, they had never encountered something quite like that.  
  
Humans were beyond salvation.  
  
So, of course putting a human in a same room with a shifter was unthinkable, the danger that shifter would be in could not be measured.  
  
They had to stop them. The idea of letting such dangerous creatures populate the universe, killing and entire planet and each other, was horrific to think about. Ignoring such a horrible fate was something shifters simply couldn’t do.  
  
Colonizing the Earth wasn’t hard, for what Jensen knows and has read from early books and publications from the shifters who did have part in it. With advanced technology and the ability to change their physics to look like any other human it had been a piece of cake. It took detailed planning and some time to achieve the colonization and collection of the human race so the shifters could start to fix the Earth and populate it with their own, but it was a job very well done.  
  
Jensen became a human expert without ever seeing a human in real life.  
  
Of course he sees Shifters who change into the human anatomy every single day. He’s one right one, driving his electric car to the hospital and looking exactly like a human would. But it’s not the same.  
  
He’s not human per se. He looks like one, inside and out. But Jensen isn’t one.  
  
He has never been able to interact with a real human like he was with all the other creatures from all the other different planets he has visited. Jensen understands why that is, why he and all the other healers on earth are denied such a thing. He knows humans are dangerous and he should be grateful he didn’t have to be around such violent and evil creatures.  
  
“It’s a little bit strange at least, isn’t it?” Jensen says to himself while he pulls into the parking lot of the hospital, still remembering _The Velveteen Rabbit_.  
  
They mold themselves into these creatures, Jensen knows all there is to know about their anatomy and chemicals in their bodies, they live in the planet they used to live in, they work at what used to be their jobs, they live in their houses, they learn their languages.  
  
Jensen looks at himself in the mirror every morning and sees a human face staring back at him. He sees human faces everywhere all day long.  
  
And yet it feels like he knows nothing about them at all.  
  
They were violent, deadly and a danger to everything and everybody else.  they also wrote books about a stuffed rabbit who loved his owner so much he wanted to become a real rabbit and be real like he was, too.  
  
Like he told Danneel yesterday, it’s interesting. Humans are interesting. So different from them that it’s almost fascinating. Isn’t it obvious to be curious about what they don’t know? That’s the very reason why shifters travel through the universe, after all.  
  
Of course, Jensen didn’t exactly mention how he still finds a bit strange how they live the lives humans used to but never got to interact with one. Not to Danneel or anyone else.  
  
But, still.   
  
Jensen shakes his head, looking at himself in the rearview mirror before rubbing his eyes with one hand. If nobody else thinks the way he does then it’s just him and he needs to let it go. Maybe Danneel is right and Jensen is doing too much work and not having enough distractions.  
  
This is his distraction, though. Work. Coming to the hospital, doing research, reading and maybe sometimes watching cooking shows to learn different recipes. Maybe he’s not enjoying life on earth to the fullest? To Jensen it doesn’t sound exactly dull, what he does with his days, but there’s nothing that interests him beyond his simple and comfortable schedule. He hears of shifters that do extreme sports like jumping from airplanes or climbing mountains, but that doesn’t sound like Jensen at all.  
  
“Good morning, Healer Ackles!” He hears a cheerful voice coming from the desk to his right when he walks into the hospital, too engrossed in his thoughts to even realize someone is talking to him until the girl giggles by his side. “Seems like you’re a little lost this morning. Penny for your thoughts?”  
  
Jensen blinks, looking confused for a second before managing a polite smile. “Good morning, Alona,”  
  
The blonde smiles right back at him and just like it happened with Danneel the night before, the smile reaches every part of her hazel eyes. It’s almost like they shine even more now that she’s showing Jensen her perfectly aligned teeth.  
  
He considers it for a moment, telling Alona about _The Velveteen Rabbit_. But also about how his grandfather used to say that shifters can’t connect with any species in the universe unless they interact with them, unless they learn by their side and can do something as simple as reach over and touch them. Jensen thinks about explaining Alona how sometimes during his commonly considered dull nights of research in his pleasantly silent house he can only think one single thing for several hours. _Isn’t it strange that we live here without even knowing them?  
  
_ All of it rushes over Jensen’s head in the time span of thirty seconds, in which Alona doesn’t stop smiling at him with a friendly expression.  
  
Int the end, Jensen simply nods and says: “I was thinking that maybe I should start playing golf, what do you think?”

 

  
—

 

  
  
See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil.  
  
Jensen stares at the pictorial maxim in the book he bought that day to read during lunch after he finished checking on all his pregnant patients. Two of them had an in-vitro three months ago and three of them only a couple weeks prior to that.  
  
The three wise monkeys are the embodiment of a proverbial principle about being of good mind, speech and action. Apparently it stemmed from an Asian country, and it’s depicted by three animals, each one of them covering either their eyes, ears or mouth. There is some extra explanation about how sometimes these three monkeys were also made into sculptures and that the meaning behind them was adopted into Buddhism.  
  
This one book is, of course, not about medicine, or anatomy or any of Jensen’s area of expertise. He’s pretty sure he already read all of books in the medicine and science section of the library so he has started wandering around between different shelves trying to find something interesting to read during his free time. A lot of the books in the library are shifters’ books, but some of them were written by humans too.  
  
Shifters recognize humans had some things worth saving: parts of their cultures, art and literature. Little white spots in a the sea of darkness. Jensen once heard someone in the library say that reading human books was like learning about a lost culture of barbaric monsters.  
  
It was basically their way of saying “The deadly creatures could write? Fascinating! How did they find the time in between all the killing and narcissism?”  
  
For Jensen’s species, humans were truly one of a kind. But a kind that had to be locked up for sure.  
  
Jensen is about to turn the page when something catches his attention: a small asterisk at the end of the explanation made in ink. It’s almost minuscule, he probably wouldn’t have noticed but sometimes he rubs the pages of the books he reads without noticing, and this time he smudged the little symbol with his thumb. He thought it was part of the original printing at first, but it’s something someone else inscribed manually into the book. A quick glance to the bottom page of the book allows him to find an extra note written in the same ink, so frail and delicately executed that it almost seems that it was part of the book too. It’s the kind of thing you wouldn’t notice unless you really pay attention.  
  
The handwritten explanation is one phrase. _No. It means to remain deliberately and totally ignorant of that which is around you. To turn a blind eye towards everything and everyone._  
  
It takes Jensen half a second to understand that this note wasn’t written by the shifter who works at the library some blocks from his house.  
  
Simply because a shifter would never make a note like that. Someone of Jensen’s species wouldn’t take a book to disagree with its legitimate author and turn something with a good message into something bad.  
  
This is something a human wrote into the book when it used to belong to them.  
  
Jensen gets punched with the overwhelming sensation that he doesn’t register Tahmoh waving at him while he crosses the hospital’s cafeteria, walking towards him with the intention to share his empty table with him. It’s not until Tahmoh moves one of the chairs in front of Jensen that he snaps out of it, closing the book harshly mostly out of instinct.  
  
“Woah,” Tahmoh moves his eyes from Jensen’s face to his closed book. He only looks entertained by his reaction, something Jensen appreciates. There is no reason for Tahmoh to be suspicious, which he should, because right now Jensen is holding something that should be returned and reported to his library immediately. “What was that all about?”  
  
“Sorry,” Jensen looks down at the closed book, page now completely lost. “You startled me.”  
  
“It’s okay, I shouldn’t have interrupted like that while you were reading,” Tahmoh doesn’t ask beyond that, doesn’t ask why Jensen’s reaction was to close the book immediately. Of course he doesn’t, it’s not in shifters’ nature to be suspicious of each other. Tahmoh trusts that Jensen and all the other shifters that now live on Earth wouldn’t do anything against the rules that keep them safe. “What are you reading, by the way? Because I found this great book about _modern medicine_ and it’s pretty interesting. It’s a lot like the medicine practiced on Venus…”  
  
And just like that, Tahmoh shifts the conversation into a nice and pleasant direction, not even suspecting that Jensen is holding the book cover so hard it’s starting to hurt his fingers somewhatand his heart is beating a little too fast.  
  
Jensen’s excited. So incredibly excited.  
  
It’s not exactly a human interaction, Jensen knows that perfectly, but it’s close. It’s like a little piece of a human, something small, like a secret. Something a human thought and wrote down in their own book while they were reading, a simple disagreement they felt the need to clarify.  
  
And yet for Jensen it’s so huge.  
  
Just this morning he had been thinking how he would never be able to do what his grandfather taught him about connecting with humans and now this happens. Granted it’s not a big deal, just a small note in a big book. But still. It’s something. A minimal interaction, a little indirect, but an interaction anyway. It’s a small glance into the world human behavior, casual human behavior that doesn’t come from computer screens and research. Jensen doesn’t think he has ever been this interested to read a single phrase in his entire life. And he had has a really long life already.  
  
He has to wait until he’s home thought, or at least until he’s back in his car at the end of his shift.  
  
There’s a reason why his first instinct was to close the book when Tahmoh came around humans’ instincts prevailing his shifter’s heritage.    
  
It’s not like he is doing something wrong, Jensen didn’t pick out this book on purpose knowing it had a handwritten note made by a human—what if there’s more than one? Jensen thinks in wonder later, while consulting with a patient who has the common flu, excitement peaking in his chest once more—if he knew they were he would have probably not picked it, no matter how much curiosity curled in his mind.  
  
Shifters don’t lie, they don’t do things against the rules.  
  
But now that he has the book in his hands and has already read the little phrase, well, doesn’t make much difference to return the book next morning as opposed to right now like he probably should, right?   
  
He’s not lying or acting dishonestly. He is going to give back the book, even report it. Jensen just wants to take a small peek at it before giving it back. That’s all.  
  
Jensen wouldn’t even have known that books with humans’ notes and handwriting in them were banned in the first place if it wasn’t for the shifter in charge of the library, Miss Ferris. She is much older than Jensen, but just as nice and welcoming than anyone else, always offering him coffee whenever he stops by to return or get new books. One day, Jensen was just commenting on how he was slowly running out of medicine books to check out, when she had nodded sympathetically, letting out a small huff before saying “I’m sorry honey, we would have a lot more of those if so many of them wouldn’t have so many notes on the pages. Apparently humans who owned scientific books liked to write on them, which makes them all banned material. A little over the top, don’t you think, dear?”  
  
There was no malicious intention or doubt against the rules set up to have a peaceful experience on earth. Of course not, Jensen had thought.  
  
A couple seconds later, Miss Ferris decided to add “But it’s all for our protection, so I guess it’s alright.”  
  
She would have to add jensen’s book to the banned ones once he returned it and it would never go back it to its rightful place on the shelf that was part of library’s history section.  
  
After a quick consideration of what Miss Ferris had said along with Tahmoh almost catching him practically beaming over an old annotation written in ink, Jensen decides that waiting until he’s home is for the best. All he wants to do is check for more little snippets from the previous owner of this book, maybe get another insight of simple human divagations. Jensen is almost eager to find another angle to look at a human’s thoughts and behavior.  
  
‘Pure scientific curiosity’ Jensen tells himself that afternoon while he performs an in-vitro pregnancy on an over-excited shifter who keeps asking him tons of questions along with her wife.  
  
This is just him being a good healer, trying to investigate any kind of human insight he gets. Didn’t his grandfather use to say that they had to interact with all living forms to truly care for them? Isn't knowing humans part of the process to love them and want to help them in a true act of kindness? Of course. Absolutely. And all shifters seem to agree that his grandfather was one of the best healers they ever had, right?  
  
Jensen is simply doing was he was taught.  
  
A human word he once learned in a literature book resounds in his head in that moment. _Bullshit_ says a voice in Jensen’s mind, but he utterly ignores it, going back to explaining what’s supposed to happen after the in-vitro process to the two excited moms-to-be as he keeps eyeing the history book in one of the shelves of his office.  
  
He doesn’t make it to his house. Six hours later, when his extended shift and consultations are over, Jensen sits in his car in the almost empty parking lot of the hospital with the book open in his lap.  
  
All things considered, that’s probably the worst place to do something that could be considered wrong or against the law, but Jensen is no expert in the topic since he never does that kind of things, so he allows his eagerness to take over.  
  
Jensen reads the small words in ink once more. _No. It means to remain deliberately and totally ignorant of that which is around you. To turn a blind eye towards everything and everyone._  
  
It seems so… judgmental. Almost like the person was mad at the author for making it appear a good thing when it was clearly something so terrible. Was the human who owned the book really that adamant to consider the three wise monkeys a positive proverbial principle?  
  
When Jensen thought about the _see no evil, hear no evil and speak no evil_ reasoning, it kind of made sense to him. If something is inappropriate or simply wrong you don’t want to hear it, you don’t want to see it and you certainly don’t want to repeat it, right?  
  
He stops to stare out of the window, thinking how that’s exactly what shifters are doing with all the bad humans emotions. Greediness, hate, jealousy, all of them. Shifters don’t see evil, don’t hear evil and don’t say evil. They keep out all of the destructive human emotions that caused the end of the Earth in the first place.  
  
How can that be a bad thing, when it’s exactly what has made his species so happy for thousands of millions of years?  
  
When Jensen looks back at the book, he realizes there’s another little annotation right under the initial one in even smaller handwriting. He has to lean over the book and squint a little to be able to read it this time, just as excited as he felt when he discovered the first note.  
  
_There’s one monkey missing. ‘Do no evil’. But we all know that’s impossible._  
  
It leaves a sour taste in Jensen’s mouth to read the words.  
  
He leans back in his seat, staring at the ink with a pained expression. We all know that’s impossible. No. That’s one of the most ridiculous things Jensen had ever heard. Doing no evil is impossible? Is that truly how all humans felt? Where they really the horrifying monsters he has always heard of from shifters who had colonized the earth?  
  
It’s a little shocking and sad to discover that a part of Jensen had always been hoping that they could be wrong. That there was a slight chance that some humans could be more like shifters, that some of them could have only good in them. But Jensen guesses maybe that’s stupid to believe, that apparently it has always been an universal truth that humans are as good just as they are bad, how they all have that pure horrifying evilness in them that can be awaken at any moment, ready to kill and destroy whatever gets in their way.  
  
Jensen finds another twenty four annotations inside the book, and they are all similar to ones made about the three wise monkeys. They all basically say, more or less, do no evil? _We all know that’s impossible.  
  
Later, Jensen_ drives to the library in silence, book closed on the passenger seat. Jensen had remained in the parking lot a little too long, reading, leaving the hospital even later than he usually would, so when he makes it to the library it’s already past closing time and Miss Ferris is long gone to enjoy her night out.  
  
It starts raining on his way home and Jensen decides he will return the book tomorrow morning before going back to work. And he will make sure to tell Miss Ferris about the little annotations in ink, so she can add it to the group of banned books. Jensen leaves the car’s radio off that night, not feeling like listening to music or hearing the local, cheerful news, thinking about how mere hours ago he was so excited to read those notes at the end of the pages that he could barely sit without fidgeting while talking to different patients in his office.  
  
Humans, right? Jensen thinks, disappointed. There’s a reason why shifters took over the world after all. A reason why _The Collectors_ exist and why he was always denied the opportunity to meet or interact with the last inhabitants of this planet.  
  
Tonight he had witnessed a little reminder of that reason.  
  
When he finally makes it home it’s pouring outside, so Jensen grabs the history book along with some field notes he took home to do extra work and tries to cover them with his jacket, running to the front door after parking his car. As always, the door is unlocked since there’s no need to worry when living among shifters. That makes it easier to get inside with everything that he’s carrying, closing the door behind him with one foot and taking off his shoes before going in to leave everything on the living room before changing out of his soaking wet clothes.  
  
He’s surprised to find the sliding door that separates the house from the backyard slightly open, letting the rain get inside and already making a mess of the curtains and parts of the floor. Jensen doesn’t even bother to turn on the lights avoids to step on the water, already tapping the digital watch around his wrist to make a voice memo to remind himself every morning to check and keep all the windows and doors closed so this doesn’t happen again.  
  
“You might live with shifters but they are not going to come in to clean the mess,” Jensen jokes rather lamely to himself in the memo before finishing up the recording. He has some towels in the kitchen but he should probably go and change his clothes before doing anything else. Last thing he needs is to get sick when he works at a hospital. Jensen knows how easy it is for the human bodies to catch a common cold that way.  
  
That’s when he hears it—between thinking about cleaning the floor and the common cold:  a grunt of distress followed by heavy breathing right behind him, making him turn around so quickly Jensen almost trips over when he finds someone else inside his house.  
  
He can barely see the person with room completely dark after he didn’t bother to turn on the lights in his efforts to go close the sliding door. It doesn’t help that whoever this is is almost hunched over and pressed against one of the living room walls. Jensen can’t make any assumption by the mere shape, can’t make an estimation of age, gender or height. Not that it matters anyway, but at least being able to recognize any of those three would perhaps make him feel better.  
  
Because there’s only one thing Jensen can recognize in the dark, and it’s the large object this person is currently holding in his hands and pointing right at Jensen’s chest.  
  
It’s a gun.  
  
He has never seen one in person, only in a few books that barely mentioned them and showed a couple of pictures, nothing with too much detail since shifters wouldn’t leave books that taught about human weapons lying around in their libraries. So Jensen doesn’t even know what kind of gun this is. But he does know it’s a firearm, it can kill him and is also currently being pointed at him in the middle of his dark living room.  
  
Which, of course, makes the stranger who broke in his house a human.  
  
A shifter wouldn’t break in. A shifter wouldn’t have a weapon, even less a human weapon. They don’t know how to use them, don’t know how to fire them. They wouldn’t be able to touch one, probably. Jensen knows damn well there’s not a single part of his being that could ever hold an object designed to hurt and kill others.  
  
But a human could.  
  
And currently a human is, and only two seconds of staring at the dark figure in front of him let's Jensen know that this human is going to kill him.  
  
Humans don’t think like Jensen does and don’t act like he does. Humans aren’t like shifters. Humans and their deadly, violent and self-destructive emotions.  
  
Humans who scribble _we all know that’s impossible_ in history books right after the words o no evil’.  
  
Jensen hears nothing but the rain outside getting louder and the heavy breathing in front of him that sounds almost out of breath and a little pained for what feels like forever. He thinks for a vague moment that this is the last thing this is going to hear and wonders what it was like for his grandfather: to die peacefully surrounded by the ones he loved, with no worries in his mind and nobody pointing at him with a weapon and deadly intention.  
  
He knows that there’s no point in talking or asking this human to please don’t do it, that he doesn’t have to hurt Jensen or anybody else. There’s also no point in maybe running or yelling for help, the sound of the rain would drown out his futile attempts to reach his neighbors and the human would probably shoot him before he eventried. All Jensen can do is stand there and wait for this person to pull the trigger and then nothing.  
  
Maybe he brought this on himself for hoping humans wouldn’t be this way, staying until late in the parking lot of the hospital reading notes in a book. This is what Jensen gets for finding humans so interesting.  
  
A sudden, loud sob seems to suck Jensen back into reality, time starting to run again. Jensen looks up from the weapon—not realizing he had been staring at it all along—as he tries to find the source of the sound.  
  
Outside, the rain uproars into a full thunderstorm and a sudden lightning bolt lights up the living room for a second, finally giving Jensen a view of who is standing in front of him.  
  
A second cry comes out, more shaky and pained than before, followed by a voice just as broken as the sob.  
  
“I can’t,” Is all Jensen hears, voice small, almost like a whisper. There are a couple more sobs followed by the sound of harsh breathing, like the person is almost hyperventilating while crying, leaving Jensen completely confused as he stares with his mouth open at the sudden clear view of human standing in front of him. “You look so—you look so much like... I can’t!”  
  
It’s a guy, so young Jensen doesn’t think he’s can’t be older than twenty four. He can only make out a couple features like some beauty marks right next to his nose and the guy’s ruffled brown hair. But what really gets Jensen is not how the twenty-something human looks, but the expression in his face. He’s _terrified_. There are tears falling down his face nonstop and he seems in so much pain and so scared that Jensen doesn’t think he has ever seen someone look that miserable in his life.  
  
And more so. The human is terrified of _him_.  
  
Jensen can see it in his eyes the second the room lights up. The human is scared of _him._ O _f_ Jensen, who is part of a species that doesn’t believe in harming or hurting anything or anyone in the entire universe. Jensen, who has spent his life as a healer because he knows his mission in life is to take pain and illness away. Jensen, who doesn’t know how to hold or fire a weapon and wouldn’t even consider carrying one in his hands.  
  
This guy who has a kind of gun that could easily kill Jensen in a heartbeat, who broke in his house in the middle of the night, a person that stems from a race that was made out of violence and hate is completely and utterly terrified of Jensen.  
  
He keeps staring at the guy, opening and closing his mouth in confusion as he sees the dark figure lean more into the wall, like he wants to make himself seem smaller. That’s when Jensen also notices that the gun is shaking in the guy’s hands as he keeps repeating “I can’t,” between sobs, slowly starting to lower the weapon.   
  
A second lightning strikes and this time Jensen can see the guy is soaking wet too and there’s blood onf his right arm, red patches all over his forearm and fingers. His scared expression is still heartbreaking, the sound of his pained cries suddenly making something hurt in the middle of Jensen’s chest in a sudden impulse to shush the sound away gently striking him from head to toe.  
  
He wants to lean over and assure the guy it’s all going to be okay. He doesn’t have to be scared. But Jensen doesn’t get time to do so, the sound of hyperventilation coming from the boy becoming louder as he sobs quiet down. Studying human anatomy and their medicine as much as he has lets Jensen know what’s about to happen just by the obvious physical reactions.  
  
The gun hits the floor loudly and a third lightning allows Jensen to see the painfully scared expression disappear and the teary hazel eyes go blank right before the guy passes out.  
  
Jensen lunches forward, catching the human in his arms before he crashes into the floor.

 


	2. Chapter 2

 —Part Two—  
(Jared)

 

   
For Jared, the world ends on a Sunday.  
  
Robert Frost used to debate in his poem if the world would come to an end with fire or ice, burning to death or freezing until your last breath. It’s almost bizarre to think that it just ends on a Sunday night, when Jared walks back home for spring break.  
  
His dad and Jeff are nowhere to be seen and the door is unlocked, something that re-opens an invisible wound in the inside of his chest for a second, knowing he’s going to give shit to the responsible person who left it that way. They have had this argument for years, it’s not such a big request to follow and they know it makes Jared breathe a little easier.  
  
He’s about to loudly announce he could really appreciate some help with his luggage when he sees them. A pair of red high heels, right by the door. They are way too big to be Megan’s and they couldn’t possibly belong to his mom because, well, Sherri hasn’t been around since Jared was seven and they had given most of her clothes away because even stashing them in the closet was too much to handle.  
  
Jeff’s girlfriend is doing a year-long exchange in London and his dad never dated anyone since Jared’s mom died. Gerald is still wearing the wedding ring, almost fourteen years after the funeral.  
  
That’s how Jared knows, just from staring at the woman’s shoes, that i’s all over.  
  
Just a few months ago, this exact same situation wouldn’t have caused any reaction from Jared. He would have walked in and called for his dad anyway, wondering if maybe they had guests they all forgot to inform Jared about. He’s always so stressed at the end of his semester that they don’t call him unless it’s urgent, and a visit from one of Jeff’s friends perhaps would have never been a good enough reason to ring Jared during exam period.  
  
A pair of unfamiliar red heels doesn’t have to mean anything. It shouldn’t mean anything.  
  
That’s exactly what Jared thought at first when something similar happen to Osric Chau, the guy who lived right next to Jared and Chad at the NYU dorms. They had stormed into his room one afternoon, carrying bags of food and Chad’s respectable stash of old PlayStation classics, just to be greeted by a spotless room and brand new bed cover, everything put away so neatly it looked like Osric had measured it with a ruler.  
  
“Well someone got the cleaning freak-out, huh?” Chad had mumbled behind him, whistling in approval. “Maybe we should hire Chau to clean our room, god knows we fucking need it.”  
  
“I thought Osric hated the Yankees.” Jared had blinked, staring at the big poster right by Osric’s pristinely made bed. No way had he imagined their hour-long discussions about why Derek Jeter was just an overrated player or Osric’s exaggerated snorts whenever he saw other alumni wearing Yankee’s caps across campus.  
  
“I have no idea whether he does, but I love them.”  
  
Jared remembers bumping into Chad and making him throw half of his games to the floor when they had heard the sudden voice behind them, making them jump in surprise because that voice didn’t belong to Osric.  
  
There, in the middle of the spotless room, was a just as perfectly dressed guy smiling at them. He introduced himself as Brock something, helping Chad pick up his games with an uninterrupted smile, and then proceeded to tell them they could walk by or hang around anytime they wanted. He would be so happy to help them out with anything. efore they knew it, both Jared and Chad had been standing in the dark hallway, door closed behind their backs and similar confused expressions on their faces. They had slowly turned to look at each other, and after a long minute of silence Chad had muttered “Where the fuck is Osric?”  
  
They never found out.  
  
After that night they tried to contact Osric, calling him and sending texts about not only standing them up about their game night, but also for not telling them he was moving to another place.  
  
He never answered the messages and their calls never went through.  
  
“He probably got a whole apartment for himself somewhere.” Jared had repeated to Chad a dozen times over that weekend, but Chad kept insisting it was weird. How come Osric didn’t even ask them for help to move his stuff out? “Last Saturday he bribed us into going grocery shopping with him so we would carry half the bags, Jay.”  
  
Osric never came back to class either. Not seeing him in their dorm was logical considering he probably moved away without telling them, but to have him miss class after class when Osric was a little obsessive with his perfect records—which Jared always understood and Chad called College OCD—was completely out of character for him.  
  
They came up with different theories about money issues or perhaps Osric doing something to get himself kicked out of college, yet the last one seemed just as improbable.  
  
When Jared went to the registration office to ask if anyone knew about Osric Chau and where Jared could contact him in case there was some kind of emergency, the secretary who did the research seemed just as surprised as Jared. She had no notification from Osric or his family about his departure, he was still listed as alumni in the university’s books and all his payments were up to date. Osric was even still registered as the student assigned to the room 3B, the one right next to Jared and Chad’s.  
  
“No, a new guy is living there now. Brock something—I don’t remember his last name. He has been there for like a week.”  
  
After a quick search the secretary had given Jared another weird look.  
  
“There are no _Brocks_ listed in the dorm you’re staying at.”  
  
The next day Chad had tried to ask the same questions at the office. He had been waiting for the usual secretary to leave for lunch so someone else could run the information. He got the exact same answers. Osric was part of NYU, he was the student currently living in 3B and there were no Brocks listed in their dorm. To make it worse, there were records of Osric using his college ID to go in the library and loan books all week long.  
  
As confused as they had been, they decided to give it a break for at least a week. If they kept pestering people about the same thing the office would imagine it was some kind of stupid joke. Chad had went down to the registration office seven days later and then came back to the room only twenty minutes after leaving, looking puzzled.  
  
“There was a new secretary. She told me Osric translated to another college and Brock has been in the lists all along but the system took a while to pick that up.”  
  
It had made absolutely no sense. Where would Osric had been even going to? He had have half a scholarship he had to work his ass off to maintain and was really proud of it. Osric’s dad worked at NYU too and that’s why the entire family had been throwingw a damn party when he got accepted. For what Osric had told them, his dad had never looked so proud and that was the last motivation he needed to pick NYU over any other college. Jared remembers all of it, every part of the story. From the reasons why Osric had picked that school to explaining why it felt like a little too much pressure from his folks sometimes.  
  
Osric would have never changed to another college and then not even tell them about it. Not that the three of them had been inseparable or anything, but Osric would have at least said goodbye. He would have at least picked his damn phone after endless calls and texts from him and Chad.  
  
It had been slowly driving Jared out of his mind, and that racked up with all his classes and exams were almost causing him a constant headache. Chad looked like he was handling it a little bit better: he seemed way less worried, all in a true Chad-sense. Yet Jared had kept catching him leaving voice messages for Osric, telling him to pick up his phone before Chad would go _Taken 4_ on his ass just to kick the shit out of Osric as soon as they found him.  
  
Jared had also kept hearing Chad mumble to himself now and then the same five words: “It’s so fucking weird.”  
  
Jared didn’t need to ask to know what he was talking about.  
  
The next time they had bumped into Brock coming back from classes and he politely asked if they were still worried about their friend Osric, Chad has stepped forward, cutting Jared off mid-phrase when he was about to reply..  
  
“No, dude, we couldn’t talk to Osric but this lady who helps in the registration office did sing. You know, black hair, blue eyes, banging tits?” Chad had leaned into Jared then, resting his elbow on Jared’s shoulder even if that was an uncomfortable position considering Jared had always been taller than his best friend. “Told us Osric left for greener lands. Another school snatched his ass away because he had great GPA or some shit. Good for him man, good for him.”  
  
“Really? That’s great. I’m happy for your friend.” Brock had nodded, bright smile still in place. “So it’s all okay now?”  
  
Jared had been having trouble believing his ears. What was Chad fucking talking about? That morning his friend left another message to Osric during breakfast, this time with less jokes and more concern in his voice. So he knew all that chill act was bullshit. Jared knew Chad didn’t like to look like anything could bother him in this world, but pretending they didn’t care for Osric was just uncalled for. So Jared had been ready to call Chad out on his shit and tell Brock that no, nothing was okay at all, but that was when he had felt Chad digging his elbow so hard into his shoulder that Jared couldn’t make a sound, suddenly muted by the throbbing pain.  
  
“Yeah, dude. It’s fine. I mean, Osric probably got in a fancy college like Stanford or some shit and now he’s too much of a high class preppy-boy to talk to his good old NYU peeps” Chad had winked at Brock and then gave him two friendly claps on his back “Sick jacket by the way, dude. See you around, B-man.”  
  
Brock had nodded and smiled in return, wishing them a good day. And before Jared could even express his disagreement with the whole exchange or voice the horrible pain he was experiencing in his shoulder, Chad had been pushing him towards their room, almost shoving Jared inside and locking the door behind them.  
  
“Chad!” Jared had groaned, rubbing his shoulder frantically. “What the fuck is your problem? And what the hell was—”  
  
“No more fucking talking about Osric.” Chad had muttered through his teeth, pointing at Jared with a finger and giving him a stern look. Probably the first time Jared had ever seen Chad look deadly serious about something in his life. That’s probably why it made Jared shut up immediately, hand dropping from his shoulder. “No asking around anymore: not to the secretaries, not to Brock and not to anyone. Not even to me unless we’re both here in the room, got it?”  
  
“What? Chad, you’re making no sense—”  
  
“Jared!” Chad had snapped, still hissing, voice so firm it made Jared zip it up once again. “No more talking about Osric in public. I need you to fucking say that you get it, okay? I need to hear you say it.”    
  
There was something in the way Chad was talking, almost whispering, or maybe how he looked at Jared in that moment that had made Jared nod.  
  
“Yeah, okay.”  
  
Chad had let out a long sigh then, nodding more to himself and then turning to the door to check the lock. Then, he slowly turned around and pressed his back against the door, staring at Jared.  
  
“Didn’t you see?” Chad had whispered, so low Jared had have to take two steps forward to get right in front of Chad and be able to hear the next part. “Brock had Osric’s library card between his books.”  
  
They never mentioned Osric again after that night, not even when they were alone in their room with the door locked.  
  
Jared tried to completely drop the topic, not think about it too hard even if the entire thing kept going from creepy to impossible every time he spaced out and ended on the subject again.  
  
_“Maybe Chad saw it wrong.”_ Jared kept whispering to himself. Chad’s fucking stoned half the time, what does he know about what he thinks he saw.

At the same time, even if Chad never worried about anything—not money, grades nor the future, because life was too short and the universe too vast to worry about something as petty as common troubles—was almost freaking out that night they ran into Brock and then made Jared promise he would drop the Osric subject. But even so, he could have still been wrong, couldn’t he? He could have imagined it somehow, right?  
  
Right.  
  
Jared had tried really hard to convince himself of that, focusing on his classes and imagining Osric somewhere in another nice university to calm himself down, trying not get the chills whenever he saw Brock around and making sure to always return his smile. He had tried to keep up with classes and his grades, mostly hanging around Chad as if nothing had happened. Jared believed that Chad had also dropped the subject for good. That was until one day when they had been marathoning _Men in Black_. Chad had looked up from his laptop when Will Smith was explaining why he shot the cardboard cutout of the little girl with pigtails, munching lazily on a traditionally huge slice of New York-style pizza.  
  
“Do you know the theory about morphing aliens?”  
  
Jared had thought about it for a second, plucking the pepperoni slices from his pizza to eat them first. “I don’t remember that being part of the _Men in Black_ plot.” he had hummed, wondering if it had been that long since he’d seen the movie.  
  
Chad had rolled his eyes, shaking his head in return. “Not in the movie. Like, in real life, dude.”  
  
It had only taken Jared a couple heartbeats for it to click in his head. And then he was the one letting out a little snort and turning to look at his friend with a teasing little smirk.  
  
“Don’t tell me, another conspiracy theory? You know you shouldn’t get sucked into those while you have college work or you’ll end in the worst parts of the internet for days without doing shit.”  
  
Chad and conspiracy theories. Some people liked to collect old books, others loved to do crossword puzzles or paint. Well, conspiracy theories were to Chad what hobbies were to other people. He had a weird love for them, believed a ton of those stories and could spend hours explaining why they made complete sense and the reasons why he considered them to be true. He was absolutely convinced that NASA had faked the moon landing so he and Jared had watched countless documentaries about it. There was one that said Paul McCartney died in a car crash in 1966 and was replaced by a look-and-sound-alike, proof of such theory being found in the Beatles album covers and their recordings ever since. That one was one of Chad’s favorites. And the list kept on going. The assassination of JFK, 9/11, Area 51 and so on.  
  
Chad had proclaimed he was an expert on the subject after years of obsession and could tell which new theories were pure bullshit—not only because of his years of commitment but also because Chad too was an expert on bullshitting his way through life since he was ten. That’s why he stuck with the old conspiracy theories more than anything, said those were founded on solid ground, while tons of the new ones were simply coming from internet snobs trying to get some attention on public forums.  
  
“I know how to handle my addictions, Mom.” Chad had joked, holding a pack of cigarettes in the air. “This one is good, Jay. This is one is legit. I told you I have a sixth sense for this shit.” He had pointed to his nose twice, tapping it with his finger. “And we could even be considered part of the group that had a third kind encounter.”  
  
“Oh, really?” Jared had smiled as an answer, chewing on his pepperoni.He was almost enabling Chad, knowing how much his friend loved to talk about conspiracy theories. He was always ready to hear them and indulge Chad about it for hours. “How so?”  
  
“Osric.”  
  
Jared had started coughing violently, choking on a bite of pizza while giving Chad a wide, surprised look. It took him almost five minutes and Chad coming to pat him on the back for Jared to calm down. Jared had grabbed Chad by the wrist before he could go back to the bed, squeezing a little too hard while shooting a quick glance at the locked door.  
  
“We said we wouldn’t talk about that anymore.” Jared had whispered, eyes moving from one side of the room to the other. From Chad to the door. He didn’t know what he was expecting, not like someone was out there with their ear pressed against the door all day long, waiting for them to spill something Jared had tried not to think about for weeks.  
  
“I said not to others and not outside, you can relax your ass, man.” Chad had whispered in return, grabbing the remote control to crank up the volume that downed out their own voices. “Jay, it’s fine. I won’t even say the name anymore, but that’s what this is about.”  
  
Jared had let go after a second but kept his eyes glued to Chad until he went back to sit on his bed, taking his laptop again to start explaining what he had been talking about.  
  
The conspiracy theory—named after the theory of morphing aliens by the first guy who started to talk about it online—had been going around for more than a year and gained popularity by the minute. The idea was simple to put into words: the world was being populated and taken over by aliens who looked just like humans. And it was all happening in an alarming rate. It was backed up by different people around the world telling stories that would all sound alike, there were videos and different analysis of how it was all going down. There were five whole websites dedicated to the subject and endless youtube channels to submit your encounters and videos of proof to. The stories all variated in details, but the plots were always alike.  
  
About people never seeing their neighbors again but suddenly realizing there was someone else living in the apartment or houses like they owned them all along. They would never even see their old neighbors move out or remember hearing them comment about having plans to move. Friends or family members would go missing out of the blue, and finding them or contacting them again would be impossible since that very moment. Stories like _My mom went out to the store and never came back_ or _My best friend texted me like nothing the night before and then I never saw him again, we’re still looking for him_ were becoming more and more common. The police was suspecting kidnapping or maybe even murder, but people kept insisting it was sketchy as fuck that there were no clues or trails to follow any of the cases. Not even a single lead on any of them.  
  
That was when the stories about the abductions started to spread more and more.hey were different than the usual _A flying bright object took me in the middle of the night_ plot that had been used for years in books and movies. The users on the websites would describe them like a weird version of kidnapping. They said it would happen really fast, these aliens—who everybody swore looked like humans—would jump out of a van or a black car and take the poor unsuspecting subjects that were around on the street. Apparently they didn’t hurt them, the human-looking beings just shot something that looked like some kind of tranquilizer to make the real humans who were being hunted down pass out almost immediately. And what made it all even more fucking weird was that all the witnesses from different parts of the world said the same thing: the aliens would be incredibly gentle with the humans.  
  
After knocking them unconscious with whatever weird guns they had, the aliens would carefully pick up the humans and put them in the vans, treating them almost like a wounded dog they just found in the middle of the street. Everyone described it as the creepiest act of kindness they had ever seen.  
  
There were some videos of such kidnapping, but as always those videos of proof had ever been needed and looked like they had been recorded with the shittiest cameras in the world. That made it hard to believe in their authenticity..  
  
Everyone seemed to agree that whatever these things were, they had somehow the ability to physically appear as a human, but they weren’t. They could pretend to be just like humans but something in their personalities gave it away, made them suspicious. And the worst part was how that _something_ was always that over-exaggerated kindness that seemed to come out of nowhere.  
  
And Chad believed every single word of it.  
  
“So you think this is what happened?” Jared had repeated after Chad had explained every detail of the theory and shown Jared a couple videos. The movie was long finished and they had been whispered back and forth for the last few hours. “With uh—you know.” Jared made a face, pointing to the door with his head.  
  
“You can’t tell me this is a coincidence, dude. Have you seen how fucking nice Brock always is? Not to mention how he appeared out of fucking nowhere and he had Osric’s ID all along.”  
  
Jared had shushed Chad immediately, starting to rub his hands together nervously.  
  
The whole story seemed like a huge stretch. Aliens who looked just like humans? Nice aliens who abducted humans and apparently cared for their well-being? This was worse than that theory about famous people and the president being some kind of lizards coming from the Earth’s very core.  
  
It was ridiculous—not a surprise considering this all came from Chad—from start to finish and only proved that impressionable people with too much imagination and internet connection wasn’t always a good combination.  
  
So there was no way in hell this was the reason why Osric disappeared in such a weird way. And yet, the little coincidences that matched other people’s stories had made the back of Jared’s neck hairs stand on end and a weird sensation appear in the base of his stomach. He didn’t like this at all.  
  
“You can’t just say that because Brock’s nice he’s an alien. Chad, are you even listening to yourself?”  
  
Not that Chad ever made sense at all with his ideas of downing pot brownies and a can of old Pepsi before taking tests gave better results or his constant swearing that he came up with the idea of _Twitter_ years ago and somehow it got stolen from him.  
  
Jared was used to Chad’s nonsense since they were kids, but this was easily a new level. Even for his best friend.  
  
“How about the fact that we can’t contact him for shit?” Chad shot back, and now Jared knew he was talking about Osric again. “Because you wanna know something? He didn’t go to no other fucking school. I got his parents’ number, and guess what? They had no fucking idea that their son is apparently going to another college. They haven’t been able to talk to him in weeks either. You think he would leave and transfer schools without even telling his parents about it?”  
  
Jared looked at Chad with wide eyes, whispering a small “What?” as Chad nodded back with a serious expression.  
  
“Look Jay, you can believe this or not. But you can’t fucking deny something weird is going on out there.” Chad had let out a sigh, closing his laptop and throwing it on his bed. They exchanged a long look, and with the way Chad was starting to rub his hands together and nibble on his bottom lip he had been dying to light himself a cigarette. Which only meant Chad was serious about this stuff, and that had only served to make Jared even more anxious. “And we better be damn ready for it.”  
  
After their night of creepy theories, Jared had tried once again to ignore the whole thing and chalk it up as the usual nonsense from his nonsensical friend. No big deal. This was Chad being Chad. His friend probably had been high as fuck that night without Jared knowing. Aliens who looked like humans taking over the world? Come on, that sounded like a bad novel that would get a movie with Nicholas Cage as the protagonist.  
  
So Jared tried to ignore it all and focus on his grades and not letting a stupid conspiracy theory give him so much anxiety that he felt sick about it.  
  
The fact that it happened again the next week didn’t help at all. Someone else from their dorm seemed to have disappeared and the guy who was his roommate couldn’t get a hold of him. Chad and Jared just exchanged a look when they heard about it in the corridor but didn’t make a comment. Jared saw the _I told you so_ written all over his friend’s face but tried to ignore it.   
  
The next time it happened, it was  one of Jared’s professors. At first they got told he was sick but eventually they got a mail from the faculty explaining they couldn’t get a hold of the professor so they had to find a last minute replacement, finishing the mail by apologizing for the inconvenience and promising the new replacement would be an excellent educator.  
  
Some days Jared came back from classes and saw a lot of guys he had never seen before hanging around his dorm, smiling and greeting him like they had known him all his life. By the time finals arrived he wasn’t sure if he had seen half the people who used to live there anymore. It gave him the chills to run into anyone new those days.  
  
Chad and Jared didn’t talk about it. They didn’t mention Brock or aliens anymore, but they both knew they had all that information in the back of their heads. Jared freaked out every day when Chad took a little too long to come back to their room after classes and Chad started to text him every few hours during the day asking Jared where he was.  
  
It was like they both knew, but talking about it made it more real.  
  
Which would have meant it was real, meant that Jared actually did believe there were fucking beings taking over the planet, and he was not sure he was ready to accept that. It was fucking ridiculous.  
  
But then again, they did get a new mail at the end of the semester informing them they were going to get a new director. Rumor had it he had also gone missing. Someone saw the guy’s family at the police station filling a missing person’s report.  
  
By the time classes were over and they had to pack their things to go back home, Jared has been so relieved he couldn’t believe himself. He wanted to be gone from NYU, where people he had known for semesters disappeared into thin air and he never felt safe anymore. All Jared had been thinking of was going home and meeting with his family, like somehow that would make it all better. It was a relief that Chad was coming with him, since they had been neighbors all their lives. Jared would have been sick and losing his mind if he had to travel back to Texas while leaving Chad behind.  
  
The flight to San Antonio had seemed to pass in a blur, with Chad chugging two _Xanax_ so he could sleep. He was afraid of flying and the entire topic they kept on not-talking about was too much even for Chad and his nonchalant attitude. When they got off the plane, Jared finally understood why Chad was pressed close to him as they got their luggage and whispered “All I kept fucking thinking was one of those things being there in the plane too.”  
  
Jared had been glad Chad didn’t mention it before they took off or Jared would have had a nervous meltdown during the flight.  
  
But none of that had mattered after they got a cab and Chad gave the driver the instructions to get home. Jared was finally going to be with his dad and his siblings again. After all the weirdness and chaos that had been going on in the past months all Jared could think about was watching football games with his dad and fighting for the bathroom with his sister. For some reason, in Jared’s head, things would magically fix themselves if he could go home and spend time with his family. Like people would be reappear.. Osric would be living in their dorm when they returned to university and everything would be back to normal. He couldn’t have been more wrong.  
  
A pair of red heels shouldn’t mean anything.  
  
Just like Osric’s old room suddenly being organized and a new Yankee’s poster taped to the wall shouldn’t have meant anything either. But it did end up mean _something_ in case of Osric then.  
  
And it does now.  
  
It means that’s it’s all over. Jared reacts before he can think, picking up his luggage from the floor and looking around as he tries to not make too much noise. He can’t see anything that could belong to his family or any indication that they are home. The car keys aren’t in the bowl next to the door, he can’t see Jeff’s usual boots or his sister’s pink converse shoes. The family picture they usually have in the living room—the one with all of them during Christmas, including Jared’s mother—is also gone. All the pictures they had are gone. Jared covers his mouth with one hand, biting his tongue. Nobody would have ever taken the picture of his mom down.  
  
At least no one from _his_ family.  
  
That’s when Jared hears it. The sweet, charming voice of a woman talking in the kitchen. Sounds like someone older than Jared, perhaps in her mid-thirties. She talks between quiet pauses, so she’s probably talking on the phone. Is that the reason why she didn’t hear Jared walk in the house? There’s no time to think of an explanation. All Jared can do is watch her shadow move, seeing her walk around the kitchen, getting closer to the door.  
  
He doesn’t need to fully know the details of what is going on to be sure that whoever or _whatever_ is now living in his house catching him in there could mean that Jared is going to end up like Osric. Without giving it a second thought, Jared tip-toes past the living room and kitchen, going for what used to be his room. The voice of the woman sounds closer, like she’s about to walk out of the kitchen and Jared closes his eyes, thinking that getting chased down in his own house is the scariest feeling in the world. He pushes his door open, throwing his luggage inside and then pressing his back against the door, covering his mouth to not make too much noise. The door of the kitchen opens and Jared peeks through his almost completely closed door, space so small it can’t be more than an inch or two.  
  
There’s a woman who Jared has never seen in her life. She has short blonde hair and a blue dress that, unlike her, Jared recognizes from somewhere but he needs to make an effort to remember. When it hits him, it feels a punch in the stomach, leaving him out of breath and scared to death. That’s his mom’s dress. The only one left in the house. The blue dress that had smelled like flowers when Jared fell asleep on her lap all those years ago, the one Jared saved when his dad was taking out all of Sheri’s clothes to give up to charity after she died.  
  
Nobody else knew Jared had it as he had kept it hidden under his bed, inside of an old box.  
  
He turns around slowly, feeling his eyes well up with tears. Jared’s not sure if he’s about to cry out of sadness or fear. Where is his dad? Where is everybody? How can some woman be living there and using one of his mom’s old dresses? When he blinks out the tears, Jared understands how that thing talking on the phone in his living room found the dress. His room, or what it’s left of it, it’s stocked up with boxes. He was so freaked out when he got inside that he didn’t even notice. His bed, his books, desk and anything that used to be there is gone. All replaced by boxes filled up with stuff.  
  
Reaching for the one closest to him, Jared slowly picks up the lid, gasping and letting go immediately, pressing his hand to his chest like he just got burned. His dad’s clothes along with some of Megan’s toys are in there.  
  
This _can’t_ be happening.  
  
It can’t be real. What Chad told him, what people have been reporting and talking about online, recording videos and trying to make the police believe it’s happening. It can’t be true. Yet, it is. The proof being put in boxes right in front of Jared along with his missing family and the strange woman living in what used to be his house. And now Jared is going to be missing too. Chad is not going to hear from him in days, just like it happened with Osric. And when he comes to his house to look for Jared and sees the blonde woman open the door, he’ll know too. Chad will know that he won’t ever see Jared again.  
  
For a long moment it feels like Jared is drowning. He’s suffocating, between what left of his family’s possessions and his luggage. He stands there, terrified and waiting for the woman to notice him and then _what_? Kill him? Abduct him? He has no . Whatever it is, it can’t be good. And it’s right there, waiting for Jared in his immediate future.  
  
He wonders for a long moment if he will at least be able to see his mom again. If life ending at the hands of those things that are taking over the planet will be the same as dying by any other cause, Jared at least hopes it will let him meet his family again. He looks down, rubbing his eyes with the back of his hand and trying to not make too much noise, thinking how sad it is for him to just stand there and wait for it all to end. How pathetic. His mom didn’t do that. But then again, Jared had never been like her.  
  
He squeezes his eyes shut when he hears the woman’s voice get closer and closer to his room, just to finally walk past him, going into what used to be Megan’s room. And after what feels like the longest minute of Jared’s life, she walks back out, saying loudly on the phone that she’s on her way out. Two heartbeats later, he hears the front door clicking shut.  
  
Sense seems to flow back into Jared immediately.  
  
He springs into action, taking his bag and storming out of his old room, running towards the door without looking back. Because if he does, if he stops and tries to take something with him like the picture of his family or something that belonged to each of his siblings, she might come back. Or Jared might want to stay. And he can’t, because that’s not his home anymore, because he will never see his family in there again, and staying at what used to be his home won’t bring anything back to normal.


	3. Chapter 3

—Part Three—  
(Jared)

 

 

He’s not looking where he’s going once he leaves the house, not even bothering to close the door behind him. Jared just runs, thinking about nothing else but escaping and putting as much distance as possible between him and what used to be his home along with the thing that looks like a woman dressed in his mother’s old blue dress.

Is not until he’s crossing the street that Jared stops for a second and realizes he’s going straight to Chad’s house, his brain following the most familiar path since Jared isn’t paying attention to where he’s going. He stops running now, only walking slowly towards the white house across the street. It looks just like it has been looking for years, not a single change on the outside. The second home after what used to be Jared’s place, where Jared would always feel as safe and happy. Chad had always lived here with his father, as an only child and with his mother gone since when Chad was a kid. He was the only one who got how Jared felt after Sherri died and they moved. Coming to the Murray household to hide in Chad’s room some weeks after his mom’s funeral because he couldn’t deal to be back home with his dad and siblings always brought him comfort.

And now he’s standing right in front of it, terrified to find somebody else than Chad’s dad opening the door. Did the same thing happen already to him? What did Chad find whenever he got out of the cab and walked inside? Maybe he wasn’t as lucky as Jared. Maybe those things did see Chad.

What if they already got him?

That makes Jared climb the remaining steps to be standing in front of the door, ready to push it open and just make his way inside one way or another. He already lost his family, that’s for damn sure. Jared is not going to lose his best friend, too.

But before he can grab the knob and shove against the door, someone swings it open from the inside, making Jared gasp in surprise and step back, terrified.

“Jared.” Chad hisses, immediately grabbing him by his wrist and pulling him inside of the house, dragging his luggage along. He looks around, checking that nobody is looking in their direction before closing the door again and locking it with trembling hands.

Jared doesn’t wait for Chad to fully turn around before he’s almost jumping him, breathing heavily as he hugs the breath out of Chad. At least he’s got Chad. They didn’t take him too.

“Jared, fuck.” Chad breathes out, patting his back and letting Jared cling to him for a minute longer. “Dude, my dad…his things are gone and for the shit I found around the house I think a couple is living here. Listen, Jared. I know you think I’m fucking crazy about this but you got to come look with me and—”

“My family is gone too.”

It makes Chad stop and pull back, looking at Jared with a worried face.

There’s nothing much they can do besides quickly telling each other what happened and try to decide what’s next for them. It seems like those things took over Chad’s home too as they can’t find a thing that used to belong to Chad’s dad and his room had been turned into a studio. All his things are gone, and when Jared tells him about finding all his belongings in boxes in his own room, Chad says that’s the creepiest shit he has ever heard. Jared can’t say he disagrees.

Staying is straight up out of question. Chad doesn’t know what happens to people who gets taken either, post-abduction information isn’t part of what he has seen online because only the ones who have escaped or people who had family or friends taken away write about it. Nobody has said anything about being taken and coming back.

“Because nobody comes back.” Chad explains as they take all they can from the kitchen, putting in a large black bag. Jared says nothing, controlling his needs to throw up.

He’s still wrapping his head around the fact that all this is real. Dealing with maybe never seeing his family again or the entire world going to shit seems like too much right now, Jared needs to go one at a time. If he tries to think of any of that right now he’s going to lose his mind, and he can’t do that. Not right now. So Jared locks it somewhere in the back of his head and keeps on packing food. They need to leave. Neither of them knows where to but it doesn’t matter. The faster they leave that house, the better.

The things now living at Chad’s house at least kept what used to be the Murray’s car. Chad always carries a spare key with him, so that’s what they are using to get out. They load it with their bags, the bag of food and whatever money they can find. It’s not much but it will have to do along with whatever they are carrying in their wallets.

Rushing out of the house and knowing that when those things are back they will know someone broke in, Chad says they need to drive as far as possible from there. Drive to the other side of the city and find somewhere to spend the night. Jared nods, numb and doing whatever plan Chad has. He’s too dumbstruck to think for himself, following Chad’s orders and indications without exactly realizing what’s going on.

After feeling like Chad has been talking and driving for forever, while Jared listens with his face pressed against the window in the passenger seat without saying a word, he finally stops at a motel for them to spend the night.

They don’t talk anymore after paying for the room and not bothering to unpack, only bringing the bag of food with them so they can have something for dinner before sleep. Now that they can relax for only a moment, it feels like the truth is sinking in. Not even Chad makes a comment anymore when throwing his third bag of Doritos into the trash can and climbing over one of the queen sized beds, mumbling Jared to let the lights on as he covers himself with the blankets and turns around, facing the wall.

Jared nods but stays quiet, curled into himself on his own bed and looking straight ahead. This is what losing your mind must feel like.

He’s never going to see his dad again. Chad’s never going to see his dad again. Did they know when it happened? Did they see it coming? It had to be at the same time, if any of them went missing before the other they would have called Jared. He looks for the phone in his pocket, unlocking it and checking his call history. The last time he spoke to one of them was four days ago. Jeff wanted to know if Jared needed him to pick him up at the airport, but Jared said they would take a cab. Chad said the same thing to his dad a week ago. Is that all it takes for those things to make someone disappear? A week. Four days. And then it’s like they never existed.

Jared rolls over, facing away from Chad and hiding his face in a pillow as he starts to cry. For a few moments he thinks Chad is too, crying, just like Jared. But they both pretend to not hear the other, not because they want to ignore it, but because they both know they need to dwell on this alone at first.

Jared doesn’t know how long he cries until he eventually falls asleep, dreaming about being back home, hiding in his room while something keeps pushing his door, trying to get in.

They spend two days locked in their motel room, not going out or opening the doors, both of them terrified of knowing that there’s something out there. Something taking humans and possibly going after them eventually. They eat from their black bag, shower and lay in their respective beds. And nothing else. They exchange words sometimes or just look at each other, both scared but relieved that they have each other. Jared would have stepped into the middle of a busy street and let a car roll over him if he was alone. They don’t talk much because there’s nothing to say, they don’t know what to do or how to handle any of this. Chad uses his computer to check the websites that talk about the morphing aliens and tries to find if there’s more people running away like them. If there are, they are probably not going to post about it online.

After the third night of crying himself to sleep, Jared looks up when Chad comes out of the bathroom, dressed in the same clothes and drying his hair with an old towel.

“I have been thinking.” he starts, nearly whispering. “That we need to get money. And we can’t stay here for too long. I think—I think staying anywhere too long could be dangerous.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Chad nods in return, leaving the towel on the floor before going to sit on Jared’s bed. “I have been thinking that too. Money and leave, dude but—I didn’t know if you…”

“I’m just as scared as you.” Jared smiles for a second. “But we have to.”

“Who said anything about being scared?” Chad jokes, shoving Jared playfully and making him laugh for a second. “Dude this shit is crazy. I don’t know how to deal with it.”

Jared sighs, watching Chad scratch and rub the back of his neck nervously.

“Yes you do.” Jared whispers and Chad snorts, rolling his eyes. “Yes you do. You’re the expert about conspiracy theories. You went to that crazy survival camp two years ago for summer and know how to survive during emergencies and all that stuff!”

“Yeah, because my dad made me go. Thought I might need it sometime.”

“Well, he was right. And we need it now.” Shaking Chad’s shoulder, Jared makes him turn to look back. “Chad, come on. I don’t know any of this, I don’t—I have no idea. But you do. Please, I need you to help us out.”

If he’s sure of one thing it’s that Chad can get them through this. He has been reading about these aliens for months, somehow knows how they behave and does truly know how to behave during emergencies like this one. Jared? He freaks out, shuts down, doesn’t know how to react. Chad is different. He was be the one defending Jared from bullies during high School, the one who was never too scared, never shied away from taking action.

“Chad, you can do this.”

Chad nibbles on his bottom lip and then smiles, clapping Jared on the back.

“We both can, Jay, e both can.”

They make a plan that night. The priority is leaving, they need to keep moving. For what Chad knows and also supposes, these things might target groups of humans at once. Locate where they live and then take them out, that’s what happened to their respective families: they got located. Chad and Jared can’t let that happen. They need to keep moving, leave this motel in the next days. But for that, they need money. That’s where more of Jared’s plan takes place: he remembers seeing his dad’s debit card in the box he opened in his room. He doesn’t like the idea but it’s all they got. They’ll go back that night, take the debit card and use it at different stops to get money. Chad’s in. They pack the few clothes they have, return the keys of the motel room and drive the car back towards Jared’s old home once again. They park some blocks away this time, knowing that the couple staying in Chad’s house would recognize the stolen car. And well, Jared and Chad don’t want to find out what would happen if they do.

They wait until is late, not knowing if the blonde woman from some days ago is around or not. If she didn’t lock the door the first time Jared got in, he figures she probably leaves it that way all the time. He’s not wrong. Sneaking in what used to be his own house feels ridiculous. They try to not make a sound as they tip-toe inside and hope that the woman-looking alien doesn’t wake up, guessing that she’s asleep from the shoes by the door but with all the lights being turned off. Jared goes back into his room quickly, in and out as fast as possible, trying to not feel tempted to bring something else or try to stay like he did some days ago. His dad’s debit card is right where Jared saw it, on top of some folded shirts. He snatches it away and leaves the room in a hurry, but just when he and Chad are about to leave, the blonde woman opens the door of what’s now her room and sees them, standing in the middle of the living room.

She lets out a gasping sound, just like any human would do if they saw intruders in her house. It’s almost ironic considering she’s the intruder and that’s Jared’s home she occupying.

But there’s no time to think about that or ask her what did she do with his family. Or perhaps just tell her to not dare to wear his mother’s dress ever again. Jared wants to, but he knows he can’t. Chad is pulling his arm and pushing him out of the house right as the woman runs for the telephone in the living room.

They are just leaving the apartment complex when a black van stops right across the street and a group of people—or at least they look like it—step out, all staring at the two of them and carrying some kind of weapon Jared has never seen in real life or movies. Chad has all kinds of ego-shooter video games with realistic looking graphics and authentic weapons and they have never seen something like that. Jared let’s out a scream that echoes through the almost empty street, almost tripping when Chad harshly pulls on the back of his shirt and yells for Jared to run.

It feels like he’s trapped in the most bizarre sci-fi movie, running down a street next to Chad as they get chased down by goddamn aliens. Just thinking about it makes Jared want to bark out a hysteric laugh, but the voices of those things chasing them, telling them to stop and to not be afraid makes it real. They are there. And if Jared and Chad dare to stop, he knows it’s the end of them. It’s a good thing this is happening in their neighborhood—or not good at all, but at least convenient—because they have walked those paths and played there all their lives, know the ways in and out, the shortcuts and especially where to hide. Chad must be thinking the exact spot Jared is, because he pulls him by his shirt once again after they turn right after a small park, going into an old apartment complex that was never finished because there wasn’t enough money to pay for the rest of the construction. It looks fine from outside, but he and Chad used to sneak in enough times when they were in school to know that it’s all basic structure and unfinished parts. Jared pushes the door open and then both him and Chad press their backs against it, holding their breaths.

The people who were running behind them go past it, talking between them and repeating that they need to find the humans, suspecting something about Jared and Chad being part of the families who used to live there.

Chad and Jared say nothing, still pressed against the door, breathing hard and looking at each other like they can’t believe what just happened. Somehow, those things calling them humans makes it all the more real. And terrifying. Not that they needed more confirmation, but now this is proof that this can’t be some group of psychopaths or something else. Those things aren’t like them, they referred to Jared and Chad as if they were something completely different.

Just for precaution, the two of them stay there at the unfinished building for almost two hours, waiting for the aliens to be gone before Chad says they should go get the car.

Before going towards the parking lot, with Jared holding his dad’s debit card for dear life and still trying to calm down his nerves, Chad says they need to make a quick stop for supplies. Jared gives him a confused look until he sees where Chad is heading, holding his breath and starting to back away.

“Jared, we need them. Just a couple.” Chad speaks in a soft voice, like he’s reasoning with a scared animal. He leaves his hand on Jared’s shoulder and brings him close so he will tag along towards the store. “I’ll carry them, just stay by my side, okay?”

“We shouldn’t—it can have an alarm, it will alert them again if they hear it go off.”

“You know my dad liked to go hunting, right?”

Jared nods nervously, looking constantly at both sides of the street.

“He used to come here for ammo. The owner was his friend, this old dude who was kind of a douchebag.” Chad shakes his head, like that detail is not important. “Said something about having trouble with his alarm system last time my dad came back, but said that he wasn’t worried because for some reason people never used to come inside his store to steal from him. Probably because they thought that the owner of a store full of guns would be armed too, right?”

“Chad, let’s just go. Come on.”

“It’ll be one second, JT. We need them.” He looks back at the store and squeezes Jared’s arm. “You know we need them.”

Swallowing loudly and feeling his lower lip tremble, Jared finally nods again, rubbing his hands together. He’ll just stand behind Chad and let him do his thing. His friend claps his back again and tells Jared to stand back, taking off the button-down he has over his shirt and wrapping it around his fist so he can break the glass door. Jared has no idea how Chad knows how to break into a store and it might not be a good moment to find out the details,. He still follows Chad inside through the broken door and stands in one corner, trying to keep his eyes on the floor as Chad moves around the store.

Logically, they don’t stay in there for too long. Just enough for Chad to fill one empty duffel bag he also takes from the store with guns and ammunitions, yet it feels like Jared has been locked in there for hours. He tries to keep his eyes closed or looks intently on the floor, breathing fast and hard, hands shaking. Jared closes his eyes and for a second he feels himself back in that closet in their parents room at their old house, hugging his knees and pressing his hands over his ears how his mom told him to, holding back tears and trying not to cry too hard. Sherri told him it was okay. She kissed his forehead and told him to hide in there and cover his eyes and ears, said to not come out until she called his name. She tried to smile but she was crying when she closed the doors of the closet, leaving Jared sitting in the dark.

“Jared!”

Chad is shaking his shoulder when Jared opens his eyes, finding himself cowering in the corner of the store, hands over his ears just likes back then, tears sliding down his cheeks.

Jared stares back at his friend, slowly removing his hands from his ears to rub his eyes, feeling like a kid for a split second.

“Jared.” Chad repeats with a whisper, leaving a hand on his shoulder before offering him another to help him get up, all the while giving him worried stares. “I’m done. We can leave now, let’s go.”

He guides Jared out of the store before they start running again, looking for the parking lot where they left Chad’s car. Jared blinks the tears away as they run, grateful that Chad doesn’t make any comment about his episode. Even in the darkness of the store, he’s sure his friend saw the tears. But Chad also knows him enough to be sure that talking about it out loud would only make it worse for Jared. He never talks about it, with anyone. Not his dad, not his siblings or friends. Like not discussing it will make the constant memory that haunts him go away.

From that night on, they start to be constantly on the move..

They take turns on driving whenever they have to and sleep in motels, not staying for more than a week at a time. They don’t go out that much, locking themselves in their rooms and not letting other people see they are living there, keeping mostly to themselves. It’s not like things are getting better, Jared still feels like he’s drowning inside of a crazy reality, crying at night thinking about his family gone forever, considering this is going to be their lives from now on, that he will never go back to college or graduate, that they will do nothing but run and hide. But at least him and Chad are talking more whenever they lock themselves up, realizing that if they don’t discuss what’s going at least between them they are going to absolutely lose it.

After some weeks, they both realize that perhaps staying in the same city for long is not a good idea. Jared doesn’t even want to stay, being in San Antonio and knowing everything he ever cared for is gone hurts too much. So leaving might do them some good. They stock their car with cheap food—being in and out of the stores as quick as possible and not talking to anyone who tries to make small talk with them—and fill the car’s tank after taking a good amount of money from Jared’s dad’s saving account before leaving San Antonio.

The drive is not too long from there to Austin, only one hour and twenty minutes of taking the I-35N, which makes them realize how stupid they were taking a main road for their trip. Chad says it doesn’t matter they are at the edge of paranoia for doing it, but perhaps they should even avoid anything that’s too packed considering they don’t know which ones are humans and which are aliens, and that includes roads too.

Jared couldn’t care less how paranoid it sounds, after being chased down that night by a group dressed in white, he’ll do anything to avoid it too.

They keep their routine of not staying too long in the same place when they arrive in Austin. Chad had never been there before while Jared knows his ways around from a couple family trips. It feels like waking up every day expecting to be taken, the constant fear of being hunted down horrible and sickening at the same time. Some days he and Chad don’t talk at all, the entire situation almost traumatizing, but they keep reminding each other they have to do it. They are barely interacting with anyone else by that point, they need to at least be around each other. Chad being so Chad is the one who keeps insisting on that, forcing Jared to keep on making conversation and not letting him drown in his own terrible thoughts.

Jared knows that Chad’s personality is what keeps him sane most of the time. Chad and his constant jokes, Chad and his ridiculous whining about not being able to smoke whenever he wants to because they can’t spend their money on cigarettes, so he has to ration them. Chad and his ideas. Sometimes Chad convinces Jared to sneak into the movies, both so they wouldn’t have to pay and so nobody would see them get in. Other times they get stupid amounts of food at McDonald’s, steal their favorite movies from stores and lock themselves in their motel room to marathon all weekend. Chad upholds the policy of doing something that made them happy at least once a week and wouldn’t take no for an answer, making sure to keep Jared in a good humor and going lengths to cheer him up when he was feeling down.

There’s a depressing part of it all though, and it’s that whenever they leave their room for food or to do one of Chad’s fun days”, it seems like there are less and less real humans out there. Weeks turn into months and soon enough Jared is sure that they are more and more surrounded by those fucking aliens. The sites about the conspiracy theory are pumping full of new sightings and evidence, social media exploding with them. It’s becoming almost an infection, appearing on TV news and becoming more real and less about internet weirdos making up shit for five minutes of fame. Police keeps on insisting it’s some kind of hoax that started online and all those testimonials about people reporting missing friends and family members are lying, commenting on how they even get people at stations asking for supposed friends that when looked up in the system don’t even appear as real. It’s all a big joke to them and they’re demanding for people to stop making shit up and let them deal with the real problems.

“Just like that secretary who magically made Osric disappear out of college records and add Brock, remember?” Chad comments as they watch TV in their room. He lets out a bitter laugh and shakes his head. “Fucking ridiculous. But when has police done anything useful at all anyway?”

Jared has known all along that going to the police would have been a terrible idea. People are being ignored and called crazy, and he guesses he gets it on some level. If he was at the other end of things he would also call them all liars and ignore the whole thing. It’s impossible to believe it until it happens to you.

The next time they catch the news is a few weeks later, when they are checking out of a different motel and the owner is right there with them at the counter. There’s a psychiatrist on the news being interviewed, talking about a mental illness called Capgras Syndrome, most commonly known in the medical field as Capgras delusion, which is a mental disorder in which a person believes that a close friend or family member has been replaced by an identical-looking imposter. He explains that many patients who suffer from Capgras delusion believed that aliens were taking over the bodies of people on Earth to live amongst them without being discovered. He concluded that anyone who believed any of this mess everyone was talking about needed to seek medical attention.

While the explanation could fit somehow, it wasn’t an exact match. Chad had already read online about the Capgras Syndrome, and it usually happened after brain injury or previously suffered with paranoid schizophrenia. But they didn’t say that on TV.

To just look at all the proof around the world at this point and make the rest believe those people were insane was an easy way out to not deal with it. To call them crazy and move on. Jared and Chad had seen it all before and knew it was real.

The owner of the motel lets out a little laugh, shaking his head before turning back to give Jared his change after paying.

“Sounds like a bunch of nutcases to me too.” He huffs, clicking his tongue like he really feels for the idiots out there who believe aliens are taking over the planet.

“Right?” Chad replies with a smirk before turning to Jared to give him a look that says zip it, you know is for the best.

For a moment Jared wants to tell the guy, tell him about what happened with Osric and Brock. Tell him about his family, his things stocked up in boxes in his old room and the group of human look-alikes chasing them down the street with weird-looking weapons. He wants to say “Run away, don’t stay. We’re all being hunted down without noticing.” But Chad is taking the money from the counter and nudging Jared so they leave before he can say a word.

Better not to bring any attention by admitting out loud they are part of this group of nutcases.

Weeks keep passing by, and before they realize it months have turned into an entire year. Time keeps passing and they keep running away, circling around Austin and seeing more and more humans disappear. They go out much less, their little happy distractions from before slowly dying down. It’s almost unreal, to feel like every time they step outside there are more of those alien things everywhere.

One time they go to a store to buy water and whatever cheap food they can get a hold of and when they are about to pay the cashier gives them a weird look, staring at Chad and Jared like they are the most strange thing she has ever seen. It rings a bell in their heads almost instantly. They get a hold of what they can before running out of the store, seeing the girl go straight to the phone. It gives Jared a small deja vú, remembering the blonde woman at his apartment also making a call after she saw them. That’s when the people in the black van appeared to chase them down. He screams for Chad to run faster. Those things are coming for them.

They try to not spend too much money after the debit card they have been using eventually stops working. Jared is sure his father’s still had money saved, only taking out small amounts whenever they needed more. It’s impossible to know exactly what happened, but hey, if those things are taking over the world is not a surprise the banks are going to shit too. There’s no more cash for food or motel rooms. So they start to sleep in the car and steal more. Chad is better at the latter, which is a surprise to neither of them.

It’s been so long since they started escaping, Jared has started to lose count of the days and has difficulties keeping track of time. It doesn’t matter what day of the week it is, which month. It’s always the same. Escaping and fearing, running away from being hunted. Thinking they have really lost their minds half of the time and then seeing someone get dragged away in the middle of the night by one of those weird hunting teams and getting reminded that it’s all real.

Famous people have started to gone missing by that point, and on a Tuesday afternoon they hear on the radio that the president of the United States has been kidnapped. It’s a huge deal for several weeks, the radio stations talk about nothing else, it’s the top emergency. It gives them a spark of hope, maybe now everyone will believe it’s real. Maybe the authorities will do something now that even the fucking president is gone.

And then one morning after waking up in a parking lot, Jared turns on the radio again and there’s nothing. The news about the president have abruptly died along with several stations that are simply not on air anymore. The couple they can find don’t mention the kidnapping anymore, keeping on trivial subjects that doesn’t seem to matter at all. Chad asks Jared if maybe those things finally took over the White House and the FBI. Perhaps the entire army. Jared says he has no idea. But if they did, it means there’s no salvation at all.

After that day, they don’t turn on the radio anymore.

 

 

—

 

 

The time to leave Austin just like they left San Antonio comes around soon enough, but unlike the first time, they have barely any food left and not money to pay for gas. They have to give it a shot anyway, feeling like not even staying low key in that city is safe enough. Now they have to run to a new one, just to be safe.

So they eat some of the last cans of food and leave early in the morning for Dallas.

They can’t use Chad’s laptop anymore since they don’t have anywhere to charge it nor the money to pay for internet connection. They also threw away their phones because they couldn’t pay the bills and there’s no use for them besides using wi-fi back at motel rooms. Still, Jared figures the drive should be between three to four hours.

It’s not until they are driving that Jared remembers what happened the first time. They took main roads to travel from San Antonio to Austin and Chad pointed out they needed to avoid that next time. They are already driving on I-35N once again, and just as last time, it’s so busy at that time it makes Chad tense up behind the steering wheel, his eyes staring straight ahead as he tries not to look around them. Jared takes some peeks at the other cars and feels like he’s going to have a small heart attack whenever he catches different drivers shooting them weird and suspicious looks. That can’t be paranoia, people are looking at them. Which means they are not people like Jared and Chad.

They use a map Jared took from a gas station last time they decided to steal some food to try and find an isolated exit that will put them away from so many cars, nervous to be on the spotlight after trying so hard to hide away. They take exit 337A toward US-77 after almost one hour and thirty minutes in which they felt like everyone in the other cars were observing them, which makes Jared start to think that those things have to know somehow that they are humans. Or at least they suspect it. Can they sense it somehow? They look exactly like any other person would to Jared, if he wasn’t already so far into this mess he wouldn’t even notice them in a crowd. Yet it seems like they can see that Chad and Jared are different. How, when they all look like humans? How can they not think of them as an alien too, at least from far away? Something has to be giving them away.

When they get on Bellmead Dr. it feels like they can breathe a little easier. It’s the kind of isolated area they were looking for. There are barely any cars every once in awhile and they don’t seem to pay much attention to them. Jared offers driving for a while so Chad can sleep or relax for the rest of the trip, it’s clear that he was sweating bullets back on the main road. They stop at a gas station only to trade places before they go back onto the road without making eye contact without anyone around them.

After another two hours of driving and getting closer to Dallas, they start to enjoy the green fields at each sides of the highway, feeling it’s easier to talk and drive without weird things staring at them from other cars. Chad even lights up a cigarette—one of the few he has left—and cranks the window down to smoke while staring at the nice view as they chat. It’s weird to think those are the moments they enjoy now, peaceful road trips from one city to another to keep on hiding, knowing well that soon enough they will run out of food and gas just as it happened with all the money. It’s fine, Jared guesses. They’ll take anything they can get by that point. So he relaxes behind the steering wheel and laughs at Chad’s comments about almost shitting himself back at I-35N, still glad that he at least has his best friend. There’s no way he would have survived and escaped this long without Chad.

It’s on I-45N that they break down, barely past the mile 287. Chad is in the middle of telling Jared a story of how he had once to sneak out of a house through the window at two in the morning because the parents of the girl he was messing around with heard too many noises and decided to go check, almost making Jared cry with laughter at his over exaggerated explanation and detailed story-telling when the car makes a weird noise, then just stops, right in the middle of the deserted road.

Jared stops laughing and Chad stays frozen with his arms in the air, cigarette between his lips, still in the middle of explaining how he was trying to jump out of the second floor when the car stops working. It would have been comical if they weren’t in the middle of a really huge mess.

“Is it…is it the gas?” Chad asks, leaning against Jared to take a look at the dashboard. “Did we run out?”

“N-No. We still had some, I kept checking.” Jared nibbles on his lower lip, trying to turn on the engine again. The car makes a wheezing noise once again and then dies down like before. It doesn’t even try to start after that time.

Chad and Jared share a nervous look before getting out of the car to try and check how to fix it if they can. Chad remembers some of what he learned when his father got the car and Jared studies engineering, they figure maybe they can figure it out. After horrible twenty minutes of examining the car while hoping no other car will drive by—because if they see them stranded in the middle of the road they will stop, and they will notice they are humans like they always have before, and that could be the end for the both of them—it looks like a part of the engine stopped working, probably after an entire year of driving and running away, using the car way too much without any chances to fix it. They can’t get a replacement in the middle of the road, they can’t even do it in the city since they have no money and those things are everywhere now.

“We have to leave the car here.” Chad announces after another five minutes of Jared trying to fix the broken part of the engine, getting more and more frustrated upon realizing there’s no way he can make the car work again without buying the new parts.

“What?” Jared blinks, shaking his head. “Chad, we need the car. That’s how we keep on moving, that’s where we sleep, where we have everything—”

“Jared, look around you.” Chad opens his arms, pointing at the endless road and the green fields. He walks towards a sign at the side of the road, reading Chambers Creek out loud. Jared looks at each side of the road, only just now realizing there is in fact a creek at each side and passing under the road where their car died down. “Which basically means we are in the middle of nowhere. What if a car passes, sees us and sends one of those hunters in white? We won’t have any way to escape since our car went to shit, man.”

“Fuck, you’re right.” Jared sighs, leaning against the car and looking at the dirty water running down the valley and the miles and miles of threes at both sides of it. “And we can’t stay here in the car forever either. This thing is not taking us to Dallas at all.”

“So, we have two options.” Chad claps and rubs his hands together, cigarette still between his lips. He blows out the smoke and cracks his neck, ready to be on the move again. “We stay here, where we could be an easy prey—or we take the duffel bags, fill them with clothes and what we have left on food and start walking.”

“Down the road? That’s going to get us even more attention than the broken car.”

Chad clicks his tongue and shakes his head, pointing towards the creek with one hand.

“We’re going through the creek?”

“If we’re walking the rest of the time from here to Dallas, that I can calculate is about two or three days if we only walk at night so those fuckers won’t see us, I think we should do it through the forests and all the goddamn nature we can find. The more hidden we are, the better.”

Jared considers it for a moment, looking back at the creek. It’s a good idea to stay close enough to the water at least for the rest of today, and they could keep on walking tomorrow. He’s not a fan of the idea of walking through dark forests in the middle of the night, but he guesses he’s more scared of the aliens than he is of whatever they can find in a forest.

“Fine, let’s get the duffel bags.” Jared agrees, going to open the trunk. They have to keep going and staying in the middle of the road is screaming to get caught. It’s going to suck to try and survive from now on without the car, but at this point is about doing whatever they can to stay safe. At least the forest will keep them concealed.

This whole surviving thing is starting to look a lot like those scenes in The Walking Dead with the group camping in the forests and walking deserted roads; scenes that would usually make Jared wonder if he could ever be able to survive something like that. The irony is that he’s about to find out. He used to only go camping when he was a kid and that was usually with a tent, tons of provisions of food and his parents there when it got dark and Jared felt scared.

Now he’s scared all time and his parents have been long gone, no way for them to ever protect him again.

The situation gets even more like The Walking Dead when Chad takes out some guns from the back of the car and throws them in his duffel bag before he pulls out a rifle, strapping it to his shoulder before closing the trunk. Jared swallows and looks away, starting to play with his hands nervously as he repeats in his head that they need the guns if they are going to be walking now. The car made them feel protected somehow, like a barrier between them and the world. Now there’s nothing and they need to be prepared if the groups in white appear again and they have nowhere to run. So far they didn’t need the guns, but now it’s different. It’s less about hiding and more about surviving from now on.

As Chad taps the side of the car affectionately, like a little goodbye, Jared tries to not imagine if his best friend would be able to shoot and kill one of those things if needed. Assuming that human weapons could kill them of course, but would Chad really shoot them? Would Jared? He can barely be close to any firearm.

They hide in the first line of trees close to the creek for the rest of the afternoon, trying not to drink the couple of bottles of water they have left. Jared drifts in and out of sleep as the sun goes down, lying on the floor with his duffel bag as an improvised pillow. So far they have only seen insects and birds in that part of the forest, and Jared really doubts there’s going to be anything especially dangerous out there. At least he hopes so. But hey, there are spiders who can kill you so what does he know damn insect could end them if they are not careful enough. The weather is probably the worst part of being stranded in the middle of nowhere. It’s summer in Texas, and even if Jared has lived there most of his life, dealing with the high temperatures while trying to not drink the rest of the water they have is almost torture. The AC in the car had been helping them so far, but from now on, it’s going to be melting under the sun while they wait for the night to arrive so they can keep on walking.

It’s not until Jared hears Chad’s voice whispering something by his side that he realizes he did fall asleep for a while, blinking the dizziness away and rubbing his eyes when the sound of his friend’s voice wakes him up. Chad yawns, looking at the sky and calculating Jared fell asleep at least forty minutes ago.

Jared sighs and closes his eyes again, trying to pay attention to what Chad is saying. But it doesn’t sound like he’s particularly saying anything to Jared.

It takes him two seconds to understand Chad is not talking.

“Are you…?” Jared whispers, opening one eye and looking up at Chad, who’s sitting against a tree by his side, looking at the creek and smoking another cigarette. Jared lets out a little laugh before he can stop himself, suddenly amused. “Are you singing Bob Marley?”

Chad shoots him a glance, smirking before blowing out the smoke and staring back at the water, singing _Don’t worry about a thing, cause every little thing gonna be alright_ louder than before, keeping the tune of the song and making Jared laugh harder this time. Chad slaps him on the shoulder and keeps on singing as Jared chuckles and turns around to lay on his shoulder, drifting back into sleep.

It’s the best he has slept in weeks, somehow relaxed as he hears Chad sing what Jared knows is his best friend’s favorite song. Jared mumbles along, whispering some of the words to himself. _Rise up this morning, smile with the rising sun._

All he thinks before he falls asleep is that he hopes that the lyrics could become true.

 

 

—

 

 

Jared wakes up suddenly, startled by Chad shaking his shoulder violently and telling him to get up. He sits up right away, feeling like his head is spinning on his shoulders. He hasn’t slept that deep and peaceful in so long, Jared had forgotten what it felt to have a good sleep, always tormented by nightmares and worries of getting caught. Chad shakes him again, grabbing him by his face and slapping his cheek twice, making Jared pull back, startled.

“Jared.” Chad hisses in his ear. “One of those groups is checking our car.”

That pulls Jared right back into reality and he presses closer to the tree before peeking towards the road where they left the car. There are four of them, all dressed in white like every time they have seen them. Jared takes a sharp breath, hoping they won’t look in their direction.

“Come on, man.” Chad nudges him, pulling him by his elbow and helping Jared get up and grab his duffle bag. “We have to go.”

Jared nods, terrified and wanting to tell Chad to run instead, but they have to not try to make too much noise—just in case. His friend hands him a flashlight as he walks in front of Jared, pointing the rifle straight ahead as they move in silence, watching where they step and trying to keep it down as much as possible.

Jared tries to not look too much at the rifle, looking back every now and then to make sure nobody’s following them through the woods, trees getting bigger and tightly pressed together as they go in deeper.

They walk for around an hour before they hear a sound. Jared shifts first, pulling Chad by the back of his shirt as the muffled voices and steps become louder. Chad swallows and tells Jared to stay behind him, rising the rifle once again and looking straight ahead. Jared points the flashlight in a different direction, trying to find the source of the noise and then realizing what a stupid idea that was when he hears a voice shouting “The light is coming from over there!”

He takes a sharp breath, turning off the flashlight immediately and throwing it in his duffel bag. Chad starts pulling him by his wrist, telling Jared to get ready to run.

“But where should we run to?” Jared whispers, breathing hard. “We don’t know where they are coming from.”

Chad curses under his breath, both of them pressing their backs against a tree so at least nobody will catch them from behind. Running in the dark forest doesn’t sound like a good idea. They could easily get lost and split up without meaning to. And those things could be coming from everywhere. Maybe they have the entire area covered by now.

There’s a sound in front of them, two steps from the trees a few meters away and lights are coming from that spot, illuminating the silhouette of a man standing there.

Chad points at him with the rifle immediately, pushing Jared behind him.

“Don’t give another fucking step or I’m shooting you!” He yells, charging the rifle. Jared peeks at the man from behind Chad, hoping that he will at least get scared of the possibility of Chad hurting him. His friend looks pissed off, but he’s probably just as scared. Which means Chad will probably fire the rifle and try and kill the alien. Jared had wondered before, but now he’s sure of it.

“Relax, we’re not here to hurt you.”

The man gives another two steps and Chad yells “Hey, asshole! Didn’t you hear me?” and just to make his point come across, he shoots right next to the guy’s foot. Jared squeezes his eyes shot, covering his ears with both hands a little too late, sound already making him want to throw up what little food they had that day.

“Jesus Christ!” The man jumps in surprise, leaning against one of the trees. They can still barely see his outline, lights coming from somewhere behind him not close enough to let them see his face. “Kid, would you keep that down? They are going to hear you! Put that rifle down, son, or you’re going to shoot someone for real.”

“Well, that’s what I was fucking telling you! Don’t come closer!”

“Jeffrey!” There’s another voice coming from behind the man, this time a woman’s voice. She sounds worried as she runs forward, carrying a flashlight with her that finally allows Jared and Chad to see the man—and now the woman with him—and realize that they don’t look like the aliens dressed in white who were checking their car.

They actually look like them, somehow. They are both dressed in simple clothes, dirty jeans and casual shirts, both old and a little raggedy. The man must be around his forties, salt and pepper beard covering his face but still somehow making his dimples visible as he smiles at them. There are crinkles around his eyes and for a moment it reminds Jared of his dad. He has that aura, the kind of guy that reminds you of someone you already know and trust just from way he looks. Jared looks again, taking on the guy’s face a little closer. He really is smiling at them, for god’s sake, and that’s despite the fact that Chad just shot him..

The girl by his side is not as happy, brow furrowed as she examines the both of them. She’s younger than the guy she called Jeffrey, but still some years older than Jared and Chad. She has long curly blonde hair pulled up in a ponytail and blue eyes along with a beauty mark between her eyebrows that reminds Jared of his own mole close to his nose.

“Are you alright?” She puts her hand on the man’s shoulder before shooting a death glare at Chad. “Why are you shooting that damn thing? Are you trying to get the Hunters out there after us?”

Chad doesn’t move the rifle one inch, still pointing at them.

“You were the ones chasing us and I wanna know why.” Chad hisses in return. “I don’t know if you’re one of them.”

“We were not chasing you, you little shit, we were trying to find you!”

“Adrianne.” Jeffrey calls out, voice much calmer. She lets out a sigh and nods, crossing her arms and not saying anything else, but still glaring daggers at Chad. “They are scared and clearly running away, they thought we were shifters and were just trying to defend themselves. And look, they are just kids. Are you two the only ones here or do you have a bigger group?”

 

“We’re not fucking kids.” Chad snaps instantly, still not leaving his guard go down, staring from the blonde woman to the older guy, with Jared still behind him.

Jared knows the guy asked them about who they were with, and as much as it could be a trick and they couldn’t be humans at all, so far they haven’t encountered any aliens who tried to pretend to be humans to get close to them. They didn’t bother, simply chasing them like they are hunting animals. It would be like expecting a human hunter to talk to a bird before shooting it.

“Did you…did you say shifter? What is that?” Jared whispers from behind Chad, looking at Jeffrey.

Adrianne lets out a little huff, still eyeing them angrily after Chad fired his rifle. Jeffrey looks much more relaxed there, like he has known them all his entire life and this is just a casual meeting in the woods.

“That’s what those things looking like humans call themselves.” He explains calmly. “For us they are just aliens, you know? But they call themselves shifters because they can shift and look like anything they want.” Jeffrey clicks his tongue, smiling just for one second. “Pretty fitting, huh? That’s why they can look like us.”

“How do you know that?”

Chad is the one who asks now, finally starting to lower his weapon yet not moving away from standing in front of Jared.

“Because they tried to take me away once and I escaped.” The guy shrugs, like it’s nothing. Like is not the most incredible thing Chad and Jared have heard in a year, both of them now staring at Jeffrey with their mouths open without realizing. “Gave me a little bit of one-on-one time with those things and helped me figure out more than I knew from the news and the things my nephew found online.”

It’s starting to make sense to Jared that the two people standing in front of him are not one of those aliens—shifters, apparently—but just another pair of humans, just like them. For the few times Chad and Jared had bumped into one of those human look-alikes, they never tried to engage with them, running away and trying to find a way to send those groups dressed in white to go after them. It wouldn’t make sense for them to be doing this now. Besides, Jeffrey and Adrianne aren’t carrying those weird guns the aliens had.

“Alright.” Jeffrey starts again after a long pause. “I think maybe introductions are in order, just so we all feel more comfortable.” He shoots Jared a warm smile, giving him again that feeling in his stomach that he’s someone Jared already knew. “I’m Jeffrey Dean Morgan, you can call me Jeffrey or JDM. And this is Adrianne Palicki. We’re sorry if we scared you, we were just trying to find you to help you in case that group by the road was coming for you.”

The blonde girl gives them a little nod, slowly relaxing as the conversation goes on. Chad exchanges a look with Jared, who gives him a little nod.

“Fine, I’m Chad. This is Jared.”

“Are you two alone?” Adrianne asks this time, hands on her hips as she looks around, trying to detect any more noises from behind them.

Before any of them can answer, there’s a sound behind Jeffrey Dean and Adrianne, making Chad be back on defensive mode, raising the rifle and pointing at the arriving man right away. The guy stops in his tracks as soon as he sees Chad aiming at him, reaching for his own firearm he has perched on his shoulder.

“Chris, don’t worry.” Jeffrey interrupts before anything happens. “They are humans too. They have a rifle.”

“Yeah, but it doesn’t mean they are good humans.” The guy named Chris replies. He looks around Adrianne’s age, long hair pulled into a half ponytail and dressed in clothes that look just as old and raggedy as Jeffrey and Adrianne’s.

“Fuck you.” Chad mumbles, frowning at the guy, who gives him another long look but doesn’t say anything in return, simply stands behind Jeffrey.

Jeffrey chuckles, somehow entertained by Chad’s attitude.

“I think that if they were bad they would have already done something to us since he has been armed all along.”

“I heard someone fire a gun.” Chris adds in a low voice, eyeing Chad’s riffle suspiciously. “I’m guessing he did try to do something.”

“Listen, Rapunzel, fuck off. Your friends were fucking chasing us and it’s impossible to tell who the fuck is one of those changing aliens and who is a goddamn human. So if someone gets close to us in the middle of a dark forest, damn right I’m going to shoot them.” Chad argues, but he finally puts his rifle down. “Did you ever watch a horror movie before the world went to shit? Not shooting at Jason in the forest is what got the kiddies dead, asshole.”

There’s a long silence in which everyone looks back at Chad. Jared is used to the way his best friend talks and tells people off, not caring if that guy is a total stranger they just met.

After a pause, Chris clears his throat, flushing a bit while frowning. “They are called shifters, not changing aliens.”

Chad rolls his eyes. “Yeah, Jeffrey Something Something already said that. But does it looks like I give a flying fuck what they call themselves? They could choose to be Britney Spears if they wanted to, doesn’t change that they want to kill us all.”

“Not kill. Just take away to one of those facilities.” Adrianne whispers.

“What?”

She gives Chad an incredulous look. “You don’t know anything about those things, do you?”

“Why did you know we weren’t one of them just because Chad had a rifle?” Jared interrupts, making all of them now turn their attention to him.

Jeffrey Dean smiles at Jared again, clapping Chris on the back in a friendly way. Chris huffs and crosses his arms, like an indication that he’s done trying to discuss with Chad. Good thinking, Chad could stay here all night telling him off if that was the case, and Jared knows there’s no time for that.

“Because they don’t believe in violence. And they don’t carry weapons like us.” Jeffrey Dean explains once again. Chad lets out a snort while Jared stares back at him in disbelief.

“But—but they have those weird guns.”

“Yeah, but they don’t kill. Those are tranquilizers, so they can catch humans without hurting us. Their ultimate goal is not to kill us.”

It makes absolute no sense. Jared and Chad exchange another brief look, both of them probably thinking that those three are completely out of their minds. But then again, didn’t everyone think that the whole alien thing was a lie when it started happening? Nobody would have believed Chad and Jared a year and a few months ago, when they first came back home to find their families gone and those things living there.

“Listen, if you don’t know any of these things then you guys could be in danger. More than the danger all remaining humans like us are already dealing with.” It’s the first time Jeffrey speaks with a more commanding voice rather than a gentle one. It still sounds like a paternal figure telling Jared what they should do. “We saw the hunting group out there around a broken car and supposed there could be some humans around here. I want to know if there are more of you, so we can help them too.”

“It’s just us two.” Jared answers. “That’s our car. We were driving from Austin to Dallas when it broke down.”

“What?” Adrianne snaps immediately with a gasp. “Why would you do that? Why would you go to a city?”

“That’s what we have been doing all along for more than a year.” Chad explains, crossing his arms, like he’s offended by the judgment of their survival plan.

“We used to live in San Antonio.” says Jared. “We left for Austin after some time and just stayed at motel rooms and locked ourselves away from everything as much as possible. We have been sleeping in our car and hiding during the day since we ran out of money and it started to feel like those things were everywhere. That’s why we were going to Dallas when the car broke down.”

Now all three of them look perplex by their explanation. Jeffrey is silent, forehead wrinkled from his worried frown and Adrianne, who had been mostly defensive and a little harsh since they met, is giving them a really compassionate look. For a moment Jared thinks she’s going to cross the distance between them to go give them a big hug. Even Chris, who has been silent during most of the conversation, is shooting them worried stares.

“What the fuck is it?” Chad asks at last, losing his already short temper. “Why the charity-case looks? We have been doing fine all along.”

“You have been lucky.” Jeffrey Dean corrects.

“It’s like Sandy.” Arianne whispers, turning towards Chris, who gives her a single nod. “Maybe the shifters didn’t suspect anything because they are young and were keeping to themselves.”

“Come with us, we have a car hidden some kilometers away from here. You guys can join us, if you want. But at least let us give you a ride away from the Hunters.”

Giving the circumstances, they accept Jeffrey’s proposition. As they move through the woods, Jeffrey keeps on explaining what he knows and what they were doing out there. Turns out they are not the only humans in their own survival group, instead there are twenty of them waiting for Jeffrey, Chris and Adrianne to go back with provisions. They go out of their hiding spot every other month to try and get as many food and medicine as possible for everyone before heading back. The group started with Jeffrey, who of course believed in all the weird alien rumors after being taken himself and being able to run away. He has been teaming up and helping all the other humans he has been running into ever since. Chris used to be part of the Navy, already retired and working at a car shop when shit started to go down. Adrianne was a police detective in Washington, who ended in Texas after months of running away like Jared and Chad had done.

“Jeffrey was a high school teacher.” Adrianne whispers as they make their way to an old railway station in the middle of the forest, apparently an old track that hasn’t been used in years but helps the group locate the car whenever they leave it hidden between the trees. “But he’s the best out here after being able to escape. He knows how those things behave more than anyone. And he’s really good at spotting humans, too.”

It turns out that just as Jared and Chad expected: those things are everywhere now. Literally all over the planet and populating every single part they can imagine. The remaining humans are being hunted down and taken away and the ones still trying to live in cities are being taken like insects flying towards the light. That’s why they had been surprised to hear Chad and Jared had made it so long still living in Austin since it’s a miracle to find any remaining humans at this point. Everyone who could have helped is long gone by now. World leaders, police, army. The few that remain cannot fight back or do anything to help. It’s the end.

Jared listens to everything while walking in the dark, rubbing his hands nervously. Perhaps him and Chad isolated themselves way too much, always scared to hear any news or talk to anyone on the streets, locking themselves away from everyone as much as possible. They never guessed things were that bad. They had no idea that staying in a city was the easier way to get caught.

Jeffrey’s group lives inside an abandoned factory outside of Dallas. “A huge pile of shit.” Adrianne giggles. “But it’s safe and it’s home.” Jared feels uncomfortable to hear her use that word, like it sounds ridiculous to consider anything a real home in the current situation.

She explains that the neither police nor the army did anything in time to stop those damn things because they didn’t realize it was a real threat. The world always expected an alien colonization to be in like Hollywood movies. Huge weird flying objects taking over the main cities, a war, and strange green creatures coming out of their spaceships to kill everyone with their advances weapons. But none of that happened. Nobody expected a colonization of beings that looked exactly like humans, making the real people disappear under mysterious conditions and never asking for the human race to surrender or start a war.

“They just came and took it.” Jeffrey says with a sigh. “Like they knew exactly how to do it, already guessing how we would react.”

“It’s like we’re animals.” Adrianne adds. “They knew all along how to trap us without scaring us, so we wouldn’t try to bite them in the process.”

“Wouldn’t it be easier and faster to just kill us all?” Chad asks, clearly annoyed to know those things had been intelligent enough to outsmart an entire race without firing a single weapon. “I’m pretty sure their weird mission to take over the world without hurting people or dealing with a war would take much more time than just pulverizing us all.”

Jeffrey lets out a laugh, shaking his head. “That’s exactly how I knew you two were humans. The first thing you did when I approached you?” He looks at Chad with a smile. “You threatened me. Told me you would shoot me if I got close. And then you did fire at me.”

“So what?”

“Have you two ever been chased down by those groups in white?” Jeffrey answers with another question. Both of them nod. “Do you remember what they said? Did you pay attention or were ever close enough to hear them?”

“No way!” Chad makes a face, like Jeffrey is talking nonsense. “Who has time to pay attention to whatever those transdimensional fuckers want to say when you’re running to save your ass? I didn’t hear sh—”

“They said we shouldn’t be scared.” Jared interrupts Chad, suddenly remembering the night they broke into the gun store. He swallows, feeling his mouth going dry. “They said everything was going to be okay”

“Exactly.” Jeffrey smiles again. But it’s a sad smile this time. “Violent reactions and aggressive thought process is part of the human nature. It’s not them,.”

For what Jeffrey and other humans in their group have witnessed, these shifters are somehow a non-violent bunch. They don’t believe in engaging in physical fights or anything that can harm humans or their own. They don’t kill the people they take, they just collect them to take them away. Jeffrey say the tranquilizers only make you fall asleep, like getting hit with a morphine gun.

After almost one hour of walking along the railtracks they finally find a rather big truck hidden between some trees. Every time they need to get provisions, Jeffrey, Adrianne and Chris walk all the way from the abandoned fabric back at Dallas, take the car and then drive to an entire different city. Sometimes they would go two or four cities away from Dallas to steal whatever they need, just in case they ever get caught nobody will be at risk back in the factory. They only drive at night and sneak into empty houses or lonely small supermarkets for what they need. That’s why gathering provisions sometimes can take more than a week or two.

“Okay, alright.” Chad gets in the back of the car along with Jared and Adrianne. “If those shits aren’t killing humans and being oh-so-nice with us, what the hell happened with everybody?”

That’s when they find out about the facilities. And Jared is pretty sure he’s found the new topic for his nightmares.

These facilities is where the shifters take humans, Jeffrey explains. He thinks those things used to be the spaceships they used to get to Earth, now somehow modified for a much different task. They are huge, strange constructions, located in different parts of the country. And apparently the rest of the world, too. They are much larger than they appear on the outside, probably part of their structure being underground, like a never ending basement. Jeffrey has no idea how they managed to hide them when the hunting was just starting, he guesses some kind of technology allowed them to keep it hidden from the human eye, but now that they have taken over the world, there is no need to hide them anymore. They are guarded by those teams of hunters in white and it’s the place where humans get taken once captured. In there, people are to be sat down in some kind of chairs and then connected to different types of machines, cables going into their bodies. The rooms are filled with infinite rows of chairs and humans sitting down, all of them alive but constantly asleep, somehow kept alive by those machines they get connected to. Once you get connected to them, there’s no way you’ll ever wake up again.

It’s impossible to get inside those things, all of them constantly watched over. It makes no sense to try anyway. The people in there aren’t coming back.

“How do you know that?” Chad asks, and he sounds uncomfortable. Jared can’t say he’s not terrified himself. “And why keep people alive to just have them as vegetables in a coma?”

“I got taken into one of those facilities.” Jeffrey answers easily enough, driving slowly. Chris, on the passenger seat, is looking through the window, more focused on keeping an eye towards the outside than to pay attention to a story he probably already knows. Adrianne, on her part, is now looking at her own lap, seeming sad. “I was with my wife Hilarie, when we got taken away. I guess the tranquilizer they used barely touched me, while she got shot directly in the arm. I probably got much less amounts of whatever they use to put us out, so I woke up when they were trying to connect me to one of those things.”

Jared lets out a gasp, covering his mouth a second later, watching the back of Jeffrey’s neck. They can’t see his face, sitting all the way back, and somehow Jared is glad they can’t. He almost wishes he wasn’t telling them that story.

“I think those shifters really don’t know anything about violence, they don’t know how to defend themselves.” Jeffrey adds, but he doesn’t sound amused. “I could easily punch and get rid of the two of them who were connecting me. Although they were dressed different than those hunters in white. They looked like doctors. I tried to look for my wife everywhere so I could get her out of there with me, knowing that it wouldn’t take long for them to be back and ready to put me out again.”

There’s a long silence. Nobody says a thing and Jared doesn’t dare to ask what happened after that. It’s clear that somehow Jeffrey got out of there, but Jared doesn’t want to know the rest.

“I found Hilarie, she was already connected to one of those things.” JDM finally speaks again. “And no matter what I did, I couldn’t wake her up or move her to carry her with me.” He takes a deep sigh and Jared looks down, feeling his eyes water as he thinks of his own family. When he glances sideways at Chad, he’s wiping one of his cheeks with the back of his right hand.

Jeffrey has no idea why they are keeping humans there and anything he has tried to make of it ever since are just theories. After realizing he couldn’t save Hilarie he had to leave her behind, and for the way he speaks about it Jared knows it’s something that’s going to haunt him for the rest of his life. Jared makes a mental note to ever ask about those facilities every again. And for the guilty expression Chad has now that he knows the whole story, it seems like he even regrets asking in the first place. It’s still unclear what aliens are doing with humans by taking them there, why keep them alive just to connect them to some weird machine and keep them asleep. Jared doesn’t want to find out anyway, the idea alone making him sick to his stomach.

In the end, they decide to stay with Jeffrey and his group.

It seems just stupid to hold on to their idea to go to Dallas now that they know it’s not safe. These guys seem to know how things are working now and how to survive now that Earth doesn’t belong to them anymore. They have a place to stay and are offering Jared and Chad to join them. A place where they will feel somehow safe, have other people to be around and get food and shelter as long as is possible and they have provisions.

They take the offer right away. It seems like the best option they have had since this entire mess had started and their lives went to hell.

That night they drive to the abandoned factory and Chad and Jared meet the rest of the group.

 

 

—

 

 

For an entire year, Jared finds a new family.

Getting used to living inside of an abandoned factory is a little hard at first, but as Chad says it’s a piece of shit, but it’s our piece of shit, somehow making Jared understand what Adrianne meant back then when they first met, even if he doesn’t feel as attached to the place yet.

The factory is half in ruins, so there are some parts they can’t access because the entries are covered with debris. But that’s one of the many tasks they can do during the day while hiding away. There’s a guy in the group, Aldis, who used to be an architect. He’s in charge of that task, telling them which pieces of fallen wall to move so the rest of the structure won’t come down on them. That’s one of the things Chad and Jared do every other week, which is usually what makes them more tired than anything, and they would dread it if it wasn’t for the fact that Aldis is fucking hilarious. Between him and Chad, they have Jared in tears all day while moving around rubble. They have been able to open three rooms so far.

There are other things to do during the week as well. They don’t mind helping around. It keeps them busy and it has become what they do, like it once was to go to college, study for exams or mow the lawn during summer. Sometimes they have to go collect water from nearby creeks and then have to biologically purify it with rocks and sand—a thing they learned from Chris, who knew how to do it from the time he was in the Navy—and then fill as many bottles as possible so they have fresh water to drink and cook with.

Some days they take care of the kids in the group, playing with them in one of the biggest rooms of the fabric, making sure to keep them entertained so they won’t feel tempted to go outside alone. In one of their last trips for food, Adrianne snatched a ball and a ping-pong set from a house, so they have been teaching the kids to play soccer and organize little ping-pong competitions with chocolate and candies as prizes. Some days they help to cook, but they are mostly doing the easy tasks so they don’t end up ruining the food, since none of them can cook to save their lives. They are usually on peeling and cutting duty when it’s kitchen day. Their kitchen is an improvised stove made out of rocks and utensils they have been able to steal. Every time the group cook they have to be careful to be quick and not produce as much smoke, since they don’t want to bring any attention to the old factory.

Chad and Jared also clean up when needed and also have been learning how to help in the garden at one side of the factory. It is partly covered by a fallen wall, so it’s impossible for someone who walks in front of the old thing to see that spot. They have to walk through the entire factory to get to what they all call their backyard. Sandy was the one who found that spot and had the idea to try to grow vegetables right there, just so they could be sure to have something produced for times when they didn’t have any stolen food.

Sandy is also one of the best parts of their new home, too.

They met her the night Jeffrey found them in that forest close to the road where their car had broken down. Jared and Chad clicked with Sandy almost instantly. She’s the only one in the group who is their same age, the last one who had joined Jeffrey a couple months back and still getting used to everything in there. Just like the two of them, Sandy had been living in a city until it was impossible to keep hiding there anymore. But unlike Chad and Jared, she didn’t have anyone. Sandy had been alone all along.

That changed on that fateful night. She might as well had been with them even before the invasion started. It felt like she belonged right there, like she had gone with them to NYU and lived across their street back in San Antonio.

Adrianne would refer as them as those three kids” and the entire group would know who she was talking about, even if there were actual children among them. It was because Sandy, Chad and Jared would always be together no matter what. Sandy had changed her schedule of tasks at the factory since they arrived so she could show them how to do everything and to keep them company. Soon enough they became inseparable, just like it had happened when Jared met Chad when they were kids.

Some afternoons they sneak out to the roof of the factory, making sure to be done with all their duties so nobody will try to find them, and then lay there together, watching the sunset. Chad uses the time to smoke without anybody giving him shit for it. He has been begging Adrianne to get him cigarettes whenever she goes out for food—sometimes they take Chad along since Jared has told them how good Chad is at stealing, but it’s only from time to time considering Chad is more careless than Adrianne and Chris’ patience can deal with—but she has been able to find less and less of them around. He’s not allowed to smoke inside, so he always has to wait until the three of them can sneak out. Jared is used to it after years of being friends with Chad and Sandy says her dad used to smoke, so the smell makes her think of home somehow.

“Wish we could still find weed.” Chad hums, blowing out the smoke as the three of them lie down on an old dirty mattress they dragged to the roof the first time they went there. “Getting high in here would be a fucking trip.”

Both Sandy and Jared laugh, looking up at the sky, enjoying the mix of blues and light pink.

“Adrianne and Chris would kill you.” Sandy chuckles, yet she seems down for it.

“They always want to kill Chad.” Jared adds, dodging Chad when he tries to hit him in the back of his head. They are used to everybody in the group by now and everyone seems to get along, all small problems always handled with help with Jeffrey, who somehow has the talent to always help everybody calm down.

Adrianne seems to be mom of everyone in there, keeping them in check but also always taking care of them and worrying more than she should for their well-being. Chris is serious and quiet, the one who chats the least in there, always too busy or too silent, like he’s lost in thought. For a while Jared thought that he didn’t like him and Chad being there, constantly staring at them from across the rooms and keeping an eye on them whenever they went out to get water from the creek, like he expected them to do something dangerous out of nowhere. When he finally brought it up to Adrianne she just chuckled and patted Jared on the shoulder, explaining that Chris didn’t dislike them. He was worried for them. Jared and Chad had saved their asses from being caught back in the city by pure luck, just like Sandy did, and for some reason he seemed to think they were eventually going to get caught eventually. It became some kind of a duty to make sure they were safe. He was always against Chad going with them to get food and would make guard when Sandy was out in the garden, even if nobody could spot them from outside. Adrianne said that making sure they were okay helped Chris sleep better at night.

And then there was Jeffrey. It was like the father they had all lost and then got back with him and his deep laugh and calming stares. He’s always making sure everyone is happy, or as happy as anyone can be in their current situation. Jeffrey gets toys for the kids whenever they go out and insists on keeping track of everyone’s birthdays, making sure to bring back something special for the next person in the list they wrote on one of the walls with chalk in the biggest room of the factory.

Sandy got an old blue MP3 player that works with batteries after saying how much she missed music and dancing around her room. She has been using it every day and was quite pleased that most of the music saved on it was of her taste.

Jeffrey looks at her with a big smile every time he sees her using it. He’s really one of a kind.

“Maybe we can plant some weed back at Sandy’s garden.” Chad smirks and Sandy claps, excited. Jared shakes his head, closing his eyes and enjoying what it feels to be calm and safe. He never thought he could ever feel that way again.

They stay out until it gets dark, with Chad starting to sing Bob Marley again, insisting that he will kick his own ass if he ever forgets the lyrics to his songs, so he has to practice. Sandy hums along to the chorus, making Jared laugh his ass off.

They pinch and poke Jared, teasing him until he loses the battle and has to join them. He closes his eyes and yells the lyrics into the night, feeling like he’s stomach is going to hurt from how much he’s laughing.

Chad throws his head back and yells along _Singin’ don’t worry about a thing! Rise up this morning, smile with the rising sun!_ while Sandy adds _Three little bird pitch by my doorstep, singin’ sweet songs_ before she rolls over the mattress, holding her stomach and laughing.

Jared looks at them with a fond smile and thinks he could get used to this being the rest of his life. Maybe he’ll eventually feel like Chad and Sandy and get to consider this place a home.

And then, it all goes to hell again. Just when Jared thought he had found what he needed to never feel scared again.

It starts with one of the kids in the group, he falls ill and nobody in their group knows two things about medicine beyond how to treat a common cold. Jeffrey had been hoping they would eventually bump into a doctor on one of their trips out, but so far they haven’t been that lucky. Two days pass and all the kids are sick and they are running out of medicine and food. They haven’t been able to go out for water or to get more supplies since there are a couple groups of those things out there, camping in the woods close to the factory.

Nobody wants to risk getting caught and having to leave the only place they feel comfortable, so they lock themselves in there and hope for the best. One of the old ladies in the group insists they pray to make things get better and Chad leans in to whisper in Jared’s ear, “You think that if there was really a god out there he would have let this happen to us?” Jared doesn’t have an answer.

They are running low on everything. Medicine, water and even food. A thunderstorm ruins the backyard garden. Not even the pieces of plastic and wood Chad and Jared had used to try to cover Sandy’s hard work have helped to save a single vegetable. It’s all gone now. And the more time passes, the more people start to get sick. First the kids and then the couple of older people in the group. There’s nothing they can do but wait.

It’s two whole weeks of spending the days with a glass of water and two pieces of hard bread when the groups camping out there leave and Adrianne, Chris and Jeffrey can go the supplies they desperately need. Everyone seems to be sick by then, even Aldis lying in bed most of the time with a constant high fever. Jeffrey leaves Jared, Chad and Sandy in charge, putting his hand on Jared’s shoulder and telling him he knows they can do this. He believes the three of them can take of the group while they aren’t there.

Jared swallows hard and looks back at Chad and Sandy, already starting to feel like he’s getting a fever himself. He nods anyway, giving Jeffrey a serious look.

“I promise we will, don’t worry. We’ll take care of everybody.”

That’s when after one week and a half of waiting, Jared makes a decision. Not Adrianne, Chris or Jeffrey are back and everybody seems to be getting worse. They are running out of the few bottles of water they had left and Jared can count with one hand the pieces of bread they have left. Sandy and him got infected too while taking care of everybody, with only Chad resisting to the virus so far. He constantly jokes it’s because the cigarettes kill everything inside of him, trying to make them laugh, but they barely have energy to do that.

“We have to go get food and medicine.” He announces that night to Chad and Sandy, sitting in their room around the little fire Chad started for Sandy, who had been shivering for almost an hour.

“I thought that’s what the others were doing.” Sandy whispers with her head in Jared’s lap as he strokes her hair.

“But they aren’t back yet and everybody is starving.” Jared answers, trying to ignore the constant stomach ache he has been dealing with for three days. He’s dizzy with hunger and sickness half the time, taking breaks during the day to lean against the walls and convince himself he’s not going to pass out.

“Jared’s right.” Chad nods, looking serious. “We know how to steal food, we used to do it all the time before running into Jeffrey. We could even snatch away some medicine, too.”

“But you guys haven’t gone out in months. Jared hasn’t been there in a year.” Sandy argues, sitting back and crossing her arms. “Adrianne said they haven’t seen humans in a long time. It’s over, only shifters out there. You guys can’t do that, we—”

“We ran out of food tonight, Sandy.” Jared adds. “I gave the last bottle of water to Aldis two hours ago. We have nothing. And I promised Jeffrey we would take care of everybody until he came back.”

They look at each other in silence, each of them dealing with headache, fever and body ache along with days of trying to eat as little as possible. Even the three of them can feel it, how bad things are right now. They need to go out and make an emergency run for supplies. Jared’s sure Jeffrey would understand it.

They are so desperate for anything that they decide to go to Dallas. It’s the closest city and they can walk there, so they can be back early in the morning the next day. Two hours top and they will be in the city, where they can break into a house and get whatever they can to bring back. The reason why Jeffrey always takes weeks to come back is because he along with Arianne and Chris always make sure to go even four or six towns away if necessary, never to Dallas to not raise any suspicions. If they get caught the aliens could worry about more humans being close to the city, sending the hunters in white to get them.

But this is an emergency. They don’t have any cars, they can’t get to anywhere else. Dallas is their last choice so they have to take the risk.

Chad and Jared try to convince Sandy to stay, considering she’s the one in the worst state out of the three of them, but she insists she’s coming and that’s the end of it. Chad takes three duffle bags to hopefully fill with food and finds two of the firearms he had once stolen from the store at San Antonio. He gives one to Sandy before putting the rifle on his shoulder, leading the way out of the old, abandoned factory.

 

 

—

 

 

It takes them two hours of walking in the night before making it to the city, lights and loud sounds making Jared’s heart stop in the middle of his chest. He never thought he would go back in a city like this, hoped for a while he would never have to be close enough of those things now living in their world. He didn’t consider the factory home just yet, not like Sandy and Chad did, but he at least felt safe. They were surrounded by humans there, secluded from those beings who wanted to hunt them down and keep them away like there were some kind of laboratory animals.

And now they were back, living what would still give Jared nightmares. Hiding, running, trying to survive while stealing a few things that could help them.

Chad still has experience in this, he has been going out every once and then, but Jared and Sandy completely forgot how to do this. Not to mention they are all sick and Jared himself is terrified. They don’t have much luck at the beginning, the first houses they find when they go into the city are empty, still not inhabited by anyone. They check and there’s no food, no medicine, nothing. They have to go further in the city, which in all honesty makes Jared want to run into the opposite direction and back into the old factory, but there’s no other choice.

They consider perhaps keep going in the daylight but after the terrifying moment when they thought someone out there saw them going inside the first house at night, they decide to stay hidden away for the rest of the day. Nobody comes looking for them and Jared can breathe just a little bit easier, yet another day without food might end killing him. He keeps on pretending he doesn’t feel as sick as he is, sitting next to Sandy inside of the empty house while Chad keeps guard by the door.

Everyone will wake up back at the factory and realize they are gone, maybe even worry that they have been taken away. But everyone is so sick they have been staying in their beds, hoping for Chad, Sandy or Jared to bring them some food. Jared feels guilty that there’s nobody there to take care of them, but all so they can get them food and whatever else they might find.

So they stay in there and wait.

They wait until the day goes by, doing nothing but dealing with their fevers and intense pain from the lack of food. They wait until it’s dark outside again and they can leave the empty house, going to look for something they can bring back with them.

They only make it so far.

After they manage to advance forward while being hidden in the darkness of the night without bumping into anyone, they someone get to break into a house, jumping over the fence and sneaking inside from the back door. Everything is dark inside and they don’t dare to turn on the kitchen lights. It looks like it’s empty but they could be wrong. Jared helps Sandy fill up the duffel bags with anything they can find in the cabinets and the fridge, not caring what could go wrong in a couple days considering they don’t have any way to keep food that needs refrigerating. Not a problem, they will devour those that same night if needed.

In the meantime, Chad keeps guard on the kitchen door, pointing at the dark with Sandy’s gun, waiting for anyone to try to get close.

For a moment Jared thinks they are safe. They didn’t find any medicine but they could fill up two of the three duffel bags. Maybe that could be enough, give them enough to eat until Jeffrey and the rest come back with the real supplies. Chad puts one of the bags on his shoulders and opens the back door for them to leave.

That’s when the kitchen lights up and they find a man standing at the entry, looking straight at them. It’s no real man, though, not a human. And they all know it.

The guy whispers humans under his breath, like he can’t believe there are three of them right in front of him, before launching himself forward towards the phone on the kitchen wall. Jared let’s out a scream, grabbing Sandy’s wrist and pulling her towards him since she seems frozen in the middle of the kitchen, fear not letting her instincts to run and save herself kick in.

For what they have all talked before, they know Sandy never had been chased down by the hunters in white. She doesn’t know what it’s like but seemed terrified when Chad told her the stories of the times it happened to them. She also doesn’t know that one of those fuckers going for the phone means calling for the groups in white, and that’s when the chase begins.

The alien looking like any other man Jared had seen in his life doesn’t make it to the phone though. Chad pulls the gun from his duffel bag and shoots him after Jared gets Sandy out of the way, making the shifter fall back and scream in pain. There’s a splatter of something on the wall in front of them and Jared makes a gagging noise when he realizes it’s perhaps whatever those things have inside instead of blood. It’s not red, like it would usually look when a human gets shot. It’s bright light blue and it has a weird smell that makes Jared want to throw up.

“Jared! Let’s go!” Chad is pulling him next, both him and Sandy just staring at the gruesome splatter on the wall and the guy yelling in pain on the floor. There are voices coming from upstairs. That thing is not alone, there are more of them in the house.

Chad seems to only have shot the thing in the arm, and when the guy rolls on his stomach and scream “Humans! There are humans in here!” to warn whoever is in the second floor, Jared knows that they are royally fucked.

They run out of the house just as they start to hear an alarm go off. To Jared’s utter terror, all the houses in the same block start to light up inside, indicating the aliens in there are all waking up or realizing there’s something going on out there. While they were inside stealing food, it had started to rain, making it harder to run away. But they don’t have another choice, they can’t have the luxury to wait until the thunderstorm stops. They have to leave now.

After making it out of the house, they keep on running through the neighborhood, the sound of the alarm driving Jared insane. But then a splashing sound makes him and Chad stop running and turn around, finding Sandy lying face down on the ground. For a moment Jared thinks the hunters in white are already there, shooting with tranquilizers. But a quick glance down the street lets him seen there’s nobody out there but them.

They hurry to Sandy’s side to help her. She had passed out because of the fever and the commotion from being caught, anxiety mixed with the sickness making it too harsh on her. Chad picks her up in his arms as he hands Jared Sandy’s duffel bag just as they start to hear the sound of cars getting closer.

Jared looks around, waiting to see the vans pull over the street at any moment.

“Chad!” He screams over the sound of the pouring rain. His heart is beating so fast his ribcage hurts, making it hard to breathe properly. “Chad we have to split up, meet back at the empty house where we spent the day!”

“No way!” Chad roars, standing up with Sandy in his arms. “We need to stick together!”

“We’ll bring more attention all three of us together running away!” Jared looks over his shoulder, sound of the cars making the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. He feels the panic attack building inside of him, can feel the fear wanting to eat him alive. But he can’t let that happen. He’s scared to death but they need to escape. Sandy needs them. Everyone back at the factory needs them. Jared can’t let himself do this right now. “You’re better at escaping, take Sandy and we will meet there!”

“And you! Are you trying to be the bait they will fucking come after, Jared? Fuck that shit, you’re coming with us!”

“The guy paid more attention to me and Sandy because we were right there in the middle of the kitchen! They will be looking for people who looks like me and her if they have our descriptions already, it’s worse to stick together!” And it’s harder to see Sandy in Chad’s arms, he can even hide her with his jacket. Even if Chad is the one who shot that thing, he barely saw him. They can make the hunting group split up if they do too and have more chances to run away. “Chad, let’s do it! They are getting closer!”

Chad seems to consider it for a second, worry clear on his face. He gives Jared an anxious look and then curses loudly, gripping Sandy’s body closer to him and giving Jared a little nod. They haven’t split up once since they had started to escape together more than two years ago and it’s clear that none of them is okay with letting the other go. But they need to. For each other, for Sandy, for everybody.

They hear the cars turning a street away and they start to run, trying to stay on the darker side of the sidewalk. It splits in two different directions at the end and Jared gives Chad a quick nod when he glances in his direction. They stop there just one second and Chad uses it to take the rifle he had perched on his shoulder and press it into Jared’s hands, who looks back like Chad has lost his mind.

“Take it, Jared!” Chad yells, pushing the rifle back into Jared’s chest when he clumsily tries to throw it away from him. “Take it and kill any of those motherfuckers who tries to get close! I know you can do it, so fucking grab it, Jared, and run!”

Jared stares at his friend, terrified and starting to cry, but the rain is doing a good job hiding it. For a moment he thinks Chad is crying too, but more out of anger and worry that they have to split up than out of fear like Jared. But then they see the car at the end of the street and it’s over. They have to go. Jared closes his eyes and grips the rifle Chad gave him before turning around and starting to run in the opposite direction than his two friends.

He runs and runs, only looking to the wet floor under him while gripping the rifle for dear life, hands shaking around his hold. Jared swears he can still hear the sound of the car coming behind him, closer with every step Jared takes.

After all this time, he’s alone. Since everything went don’t, Jared always had someone by his side, helping him, protecting him. When his mom died, his dad was there to make him feel safe. When the invasion started, there was Chad, and then Sandy. Jeffrey, Chris, everybody. They had all been there, making Jared feel a little less alone during the end of the world. But now it was just him. Sick, scared and crying in what could be his last minutes alive. Sure, they didn’t kill humans but being unconscious and connected to weird machines like some kind of sedated animals, with no way to ever wake up was just as bad as being dead.

Jared hopes Chad and Sandy can make it at least.

There’s the sound of a car turning after him and Jared sobs into the night, trying to run faster even when he’s completely out of energy. He’s been fighting, his body’s need to rest, feeling like he’s been about to pass.

With a blurred vision caused by dizziness and his own tears, Jared sees a house with all the lights off when he turns after running into another neighborhood. It’s the only house that seems to be empty, or at least nobody in there has the lights on. Jared doesn’t care, doesn’t think on anything else but running away from the things chasing him, decided to not let them take him to one of those horrifying places where Jeffrey lost Hilary.

He makes his way over the metallic fence, letting out a scream of pain—that gets muffled by a thunder in the distance—when he feels something cutting into his arm, feeling so bad that he sees white for a good couple of seconds, blinded by the pain. Jared feels the hot tears sliding down his cheeks, arm throbbing in pain as he pushes himself forward, making the thing that stabbed him in the arm completely rip open the flesh as Jared pulls away from it. Jared thinks for a second that he doors of the backyard won’t slide open, hands shaking as he thinks he hears the car getting closer. It could be real or pure paranoia by that point, but Jared doesn’t care, his only goal being getting away from those things.

He stumbles into the house as soon as the doors give in, don’t giving a shit about closing them behind him, pressing his back against one of the walls as he tries to catch his breath. The horrible pain on his arm along with the warm sensation lets Jared know he’s bleeding and who knows how much damage he got from getting stabbed on his way on. Just moving his arms makes Jared groan and throw his head back, tears starting to fall again. He’s not sure how long he stays there, pressed against the wall and with his eyes closed, trying to decide what he should do next. He told Chad they would meet back at the empty house but Jared ran in the opposite direction, and those things dressed in white could be out there looking for him.

He hunches over against the wall, still trying to ignore the rifle in his hands just when he hears the front door open. Jared bites his tongue before he can make a noise, staying in his spot as he hopes the darkness of the room will give him some advantage. The steps he hears as one of those things pretending to be human walks in lets Jared know it's just one of them.

Gripping the rifle, Jared looks down at it, remembering Chad’s words. Kill any of those motherfuckers who triy to get close. Chad did it, shot the alien back at that house. He sure didn’t kill him but Jared is almost sure he intended to. Chad would kill this one if he was there with Jared, but he isn’t. So Jared has to do it. He has to kill it so he can maybe has the chance to stay alive.

The guy says something, Jared barely hears his voice, terrified out of his mind as he points the rifle at that thing, who walks over to the window to close it.

Jared let’s out an involuntary grunt of pain when he lifts the rifle and it makes the thing turn around. He feels his heart jump in his chest as he takes a deep, shaky breath, barely seeing the outline of the thing’s body as it stands there, right in front of Jared.

He has to shoot it. It’s kill or get killed at this point. Jared doesn’t mean to cry, doesn’t want to look weak in front of that thing but it’s impossible not to. He’s terrified to be caught and taken away, thinking about all the people he already lost and now the friends he will never see again.

Raising the rifle, Jared aims it at what looks like the thing’s chest, hands shaking.

But then the there’s lightning outside cause by the electrical storm and the room lights up, just for a split second, and Jared can see the thing. It’s just standing there, staring back at Jared’s face. It’s almost his height, maybe a few inches shorter.

Jared sees a flash of green eyes and a splatter of freckles on the perfectly human face and he starts to cry.

He remembers the guy who broke into their house when Jared was little. Remembers the sounds of things breaking in the kitchen and his mom running to her room while gripping Jared’s arm. He remembers her kissing him and smiling, telling him to cover his ears and not come out. She told him everything was okay, and as much as Jared covered his ears and closed his eyes, he could still hear her screams and the sound of the gunshot that instantly killed her.

Jared can’t do that. Maybe if they didn’t look so much like humans. Maybe if they were green and had black eyes like in those old movies Jared liked to watch back in the days.

Maybe if the shifter didn’t had green eyes, just like Sherri did.

“I can’t.” Jared sobs, fingers trembling around the riffle. He can’t do this. Jared’s not brave, like Chad. He’s not bold, like Sandy or a fighter, like Adrianne and Chris. Jared is none of those things. He’s scared of the thing standing in front of him as much as he’s been scared of guns since his mom was murdered. He’ll never be able to fire it, kill a guy who looks just like any other human. A shifter who has the eyes he hasn’t seen in years. “You look so— you look so much like... I can’t!”

And he won’t. Jared knows he can’t do it.

The realization makes him start to lower the rifle, the pain from holding it up when his arm keeps on bleeding too much to handle. And he’s not going to do it anyway. He can’t. Jared really can’t.

He might as well let it go. This thing will call the hunters and they will finally take Jared away, not letting him ever see any of his friends ever again. Jared cries harder, pain from his arm and the middle of his chest too much to deal with. Everything hurts and Jared is going to die. He couldn’t fight to stay there, on a planet that doesn’t even belong to humans anyway.

Maybe fighting was useless all along, since Jared was always meant to end up right here.

He feels his breath cut in the middle of his chest just as another lightning lets him see the shifter in front of him again.

The last thing he sees are those green eyes that, for one second before passing out, make Jared feel a little bit less afraid.


	4. Chapter 4

  
—Part Four—   
(Jensen) 

 

    
    
Standing by the door of the guest room to observe has become such a huge part of Jensen’s schedule in the past days. He stays there, leaning against the doorframe or bringing a chair along when he gets too tired, and _looks_. He lets his eyes wander over the mostly covered figure on the bed, keeping track of the machines beeping in the room as much as looking at the slight flickers and the movements of the sleeping body. At times Jensen doesn’t dare to get too close, heart rate picking up wildly whenever he steps beyond the door to go check if everything is okay.   
    
But whenever he does, Jensen takes special attention to look at the human’s face calmly sleeping and pressed against the pillow. His eyes can’t get enough of it, paying special attention to the perfect curve of the nose or the curious little dots close to the left eye or under the chin. _Moles_. This human face seems to have several of them just as Jensen has freckles. Jensen pays attention to it all. The color of his skin, the pink of the lips, the shape of the eyebrows. Perhaps he’s being ridiculous. Any shifter out there has the exact same things the human currently living in his house does. They _morph_ into humans, for god’s sake. Their anatomy is identical to the guy sleeping in front of him, yet for Jensen it’s not the same.   
    
This is a _real_ human. There’s no shifter DNA, nothing else under his bones and muscles. Pure humanity, nothing else. Exactly what he always wanted to be able to meet, right there, sleeping under his very same roof and close enough for Jensen to extend his hand and touch.   
    
Jensen is both scared and extremely fascinated.   
    
And he’s in trouble. He’s in so much trouble, Jensen doesn’t even want to think about it while he glances one last time at the human before turning around to go back into his living room. One of the first things shifters learn when they get to Earth is about how dangerous humans are. There’s nothing worst in the universe, nothing more dangerous or deadly. And for that reason, whenever a shifter has the misfortune to see a human they need to call for one of the _Security Divisions_ right away. They are capacitated shifters who know how to deal with humans much better than anyone else. They are in charge to look for the humans and take them away to one of the facilities in all the cities, where humans can be kept safe and don’t pose any threat to shifters or themselves.   
    
Jensen was supposed to call Danneel and the _Security Division_ as soon as the human passed out in his living room nights ago. That’s standard protocol and Jensen has heard about it nonstop in the radio, the news, everywhere.  And yet here he is, three days later, authorities and his accommodator still ignorant of the young man living in his house.   
    
Jensen is so deep in trouble he can’t even see the light at the end o the tunnel. Three whole days and he has done nothing.   
    
Well, not exactly nothing. He has been curing the human. As soon as the guy passed out, Jensen had taken him to the guest room to find the source of the blood loss. The man had a big wound on his arm, skin broken and muscle damaged. Jensen had stopped the bleeding, fixed his arm and stitched the wound immediately. He had kept examining the guy to find out what was wrong with him. The bleeding and pain alone from his arm couldn’t have made him pass out the way he did, as a specialist in human physiology, Jensen knew that much. He had medicine and equipment at home so he could easily check to find what could possibly have caused such poor health conditions on the passed out man who broke into his house with a gun.   
    
A quick blood test let him know the guy is sick from malnutrition. The results showed his sugar was low and his immune system practically non-existent. By only looking at him, Jensen could guess that the guy had barely slept in days and was dehydrated. Their advance knowledge in medicine let Jensen start a quick treatment, putting the guy on supplements and different liquids, taking down his fever and treating what turns out to be a cold turning into an ugly pneumonia. Jensen changed the guy into some of his own clothes since the ones he was wearing were soaking wet and covered in blood, made him lay down on the bad and covered him in warm blankets while keeping up his treatment.   
    
Now, the human has been out for almost three days and Jensen hasn’t left his house ever since. He called in sick for work the morning after spending all night up helping the guy and then cleaning the mess left in the living room. He explains he got home in the middle of a storm the night before and is now dealing with a cold. It’s the first lie Jensen has ever told in his life. He probably does very poorly on the phone, hands sweating and voice stuttering while he explains to Alona why he can’t call in and why he needs her to postpone all his patients or assign them to another healer. Jensen feels horrible the entire time, overwhelmed with guilt and to tired to  to deal with. He’s lying to protect a human. Lying, to another shifter like him, for a human with a gun who clearly wanted to kill Jensen.   
    
It’s so ridiculous Jensen can’t believe it himself after hanging up with Alona—who of course doesn’t suspect a thing because why would Jensen lie about being sick? She even sounds worried on the phone and asks Jensen to call her if he feels like he’s getting too sick so she can come over and help him. Lies are the start of a corrupt society, one of the worst things you can do to someone else. _Lying_. J“What’s wrong with me?” Jensen mumbles once he’s back in his living room, going to sit down on one of the couches with a heavy sigh. Pressing both hands to his face, he stops to breath and think.   
    
He’s so wrong. Wrong about everything. About not telling the _Security Division_ that some human broke in, about missing work and lying to Alona and even making her worry. Wrong, wrong, _wrong_. This is why shifters had to take humans away, all they do is bring wrongness into the universe. Three days with one of them in his house and Jensen has already done more wrong than he has in all his years of existence.   
    
No wonder humans were such a threat. And yet the guy had been terrified of _him_.   
    
Three days and Jensen still can’t get that look out of his head. It’s there, every time he closes his eyes. That young guy, sobbing and looking so scared as he stared back into Jensen’s eyes. The sound of the human’s cries still break something in Jensen’s chest whenever he thinks of them. How miserable the human looked. How scared. Scared of _Jensen_. It baffles him. How could that be possible? That human had a gun! That Jensen had put in one of the closets in the house, leaving it on the floor where it fell the first day, not even wanting to touch a weapon designed to kill. That human had a gun and had broken into his house. And Jensen is a shifter, he would never hurt anybody or anything. How could the human be so scared of him?   
    
Jensen shakes his head and looks up at the ceiling.   
    
He should call the _Collectors_ , make them take the human away to one of the facilities before he fully wakes up. He was weak before and maybe that stopped him from attacking Jensen, but what will happen when he’s back to full health again? Maybe Jensen shouldn’t let him stick around to find out. But right now the humans is sick. He’s _really_ sick, and even after he wakes up it’s going to take him some days to fully recover. Sure, they could keep his body healthy back in the facility he gets taken into, but is not the same, Jensen guesses. He’s already the guy’s healer. He should at least make sure the human is all good before he calls someone to come for him, right? His mission as a healer is to cure and help all living things in the universe, and that includes humans, too. His grandfather taught him that. He would have wanted Jensen to make sure that poor scared thing was at least healthy before calling anybody. He did nothing but teach Jensen compassion and love for the creatures across the different galaxies and this case is no different. First he will make sure the human gets better and then he will call the _Security Division_ , which by then will send some _Collectors_ to transport the human somewhere else, where he can’t be a threat to anyone. It seems like a solid plan.   
    
Besides, Jensen really wants to know why the human was scared of him. Why he didn’t shoot. Jensen knows it will be dangerous once that guy wakes up and he probably won’t be able to talk to him, who knows what will happen when the human regains consciousness. But Jensen wishes they could exchange just a few words, his curiosity for the beings he could never interact with keeping him awake at night now that he’s so close to one of them. Jensen wishes they weren’t so dangerous.    
Perhaps this obsession with humans is not good. He’s a healer, he should know that. _Any_ obsession is bad, Jensen should recognize that as a bad trait that comes with the human body and their emotions. Obsession and lying. Maybe this is the moment he should call Danneel, tell her what’s going on. Let her know that he’s starting to experience some of the things they had all been warned about. He tells all his new patients to do so, doesn’t he?   
    
Letting out a sigh, he leans forward to take the phone from the coffee table next to the couch. He has few numbers saved in them, but Danneel’s is in there. He also has the number of her wristband, they can communicate that way for quick messages and call that way, too.   
    
He starts scrolling down the short list of numbers in his phone until he finally finds _Harris, Danneel_ and the word _accommodator_ right beneath it. A single call and Jensen can put an end to this. He doesn’t have to lie any more or keep on doing things wrong. Nibbling on his lower lip, Jensen presses the green call button so it will dial the number. It only beeps twice before Jensen hears an alarm go off, making him jump out of the couch.   
    
It’s coming from the guest room.   
    
Jensen hangs up and throws the phone behind him before he can think twice, running towards the room and only stopping once he’s standing in front of the unconscious human, checking all the monitors and numbers to find out what’s wrong with him. The guy is breathing harder and he’s struggling on the bed, but he’s still asleep. His heart is beating out of control, that’s why the machines are beeping.   
    
Jensen walks towards the closet at one side of the room, pushing boxes and bottles out of the way in his rush to find the medicine he’s looking for, hands shaking a bit once he finds the blue liquid in the depth of the drawer. The machines are beeping harder than before and Jensen keeps throwing nervous looks over his shoulder, checking on the guy. Jensen knows it’s impossible to go into cardiac arrest from what is probably a simple nightmare. It’s medically and logically impossible, yet he can barely control himself as he rushes to take a syringe to inject the liquid into the guy’s forearm, needing a second to pull himself together so he can do a proper job finding the vein and pressing the needle into the skin.   
    
Jensen can barely believe it himself as he takes out the needle and presses a small square of an absorbent patch to take away the few drops of blood that will come out. Applying an injection is one of the easiest things to do in this planet and any other. The technique changes from one place to another because all the bodies and organisms are different but the mechanics are basically the same. Jensen applies shots at the hospital almost every day.   
    
This is the first time he was shaking so bad he was worried about not doing it properly. Is it because he knows shifters have more developed DNA and therefore can handle sickness better, even if they do get the same diseases any human could while they have the same bodies. But ultimately, if there was something they couldn’t cure in a human body—which doesn’t exist yet—all the shifter would have to do is chose another planet and morph their body again, instantly killing whatever sickness they have when they make the change. Humans can’t do that. Their bodies stay the same, they get old so incredibly fast and die very easily. They have unstable anatomies and are incredibly fragile.   
    
_Is that why?_ Jensen thinks, putting the syringe away and waiting for the medicine to help the guy calm down, though it doesn’t seem to be working as fast as it should. There’s a sudden cry that makes Jensen jump, has him step back immediately as he suspects the guy is about to wake up. But that’s not the case. He knows the human is still too weak to be conscious and it will take another day maybe for the medicine to do a full recovery. He’s just—he’s almost sobbing in his sleep.   
    
Jensen watches him, still pressed against the wall, as the young man makes intelligible noises and tosses on the bed, fingers and legs twitching. Jensen knows it’s just a response from whatever dream the human is experiencing. The human brain is so outstanding it can produce images, emotions and sensations even while they are asleep. Jensen had experienced them before with other bodies, but human dreams tend to feel more confusing and real than any other. He knows the movement of the human’s legs and hands are all involuntary, a simple case of Periodic Limb Movement, as explained in the books. Yet is a little disturbing to watch. It’s like the guy wants to run away in his dreams, but he can’t.   
    
There’s another sob and this time the face of the guy changes, like he’s in deep pain as he keeps breathing heavily. Jensen acts by pure instinct, reaching out after hearing the same cry of distress from the night the human broke into his house. He gets closer and puts his hand on the human’s shoulder, squeezing it softly. The guy tosses on the bed again and Jensen feels an even bigger need to make things better instead of moving away like before. He leaves his other hand over the guy’s chest, pressing down carefully.   
    
“I-It’s alright,” Jensen whispers, squeezing his shoulder again. “You’re okay. I’m taking care of you. I’m a healer, that’s the shifter version of a doctor. I’m your doctor,”   
    
It’s pointless to talk to the human. He can’t hear him in this state, not on the level of consciousness Jensen wishes he had. But he has to do something while the medicine takes effect. It seems just cruel to leave the guy suffering in his dreams.   
    
“You were hurt but I’m making it better,” Jensen insists, thumb softly stroking the guy’s shoulder. He’s had little practice using human signs of affection or comfort. Jensen knows they use touching for that a lot, but he only has had relationships with his co-workers, some neighbors and Danneel—and those are all pretty formal. He has no idea what he’s supposed to do with his hands to communicate some kind of comfort. Sure, he has seen some romantic movies but putting it in practice is almost awkward. Even more so because the guy is asleep. Jensen’s patient takes a deep breath in his sleep and Jensen leans closer, still stroking his shoulder carefully. He’s just rubbing over the clothes, hoping it’s doing something.   
    
“It’s fine. You’re fine,” Jensen mumbles, feeling almost ridiculous yet unable to stop himself. He’s so strangely worried he’ll do anything to help the human relax. “I-I’ll make sure you get better so don’t worry. I’m your healer. I promise I’ll take care of you,”   
    
As Jensen keeps on talking, the heart rate of the human starts to stabilize, his face relaxing again as his tossing completely stops. And all Jensen can do is watch him, like is it’s such a wonder to observe, when he has done things like this all his life. Keeping his hand on the human’s shoulder he uses the one previously pressing down on his chest to fix the blankets over him, only stopping once his palm slides over the human’s heart, feeling it beat slow and steady against it.   
    
Jensen watches the guy’s face just like before, following the curve of his nose and the shape of his lips while he feels his heart thud against his right hand. He’s not sure how long he stays like that, marveling on the fact that the sleeping human is _there_ and _alive_. It’s incredible. Jensen comes from galaxies away from Earth, born so far away and so long ago it was most probable for him to never see this human in his life than for them to ever meet. He has been alive ten times more than this guy and probably will live another ten times more, and yet, somehow, he ended up right here. Feeling the human breathe in and out, chest rising and falling under his hand.   
He leaves the room after making absolutely sure the guy is okay once again and his heartbeat won’t go all over the place again. The medicine Jensen gave him should help him keep calm for the rest of the night. Moving his hand away from the human’s chest is the last thing he does, still feeling the ghost of the heartbeat against the tip of his fingers.   
    
Jensen doesn’t realize how long it’s been until he’s back in his living room, noticing that it’s dark outside and he’s incredibly hungry. How long did he stay in there, simply watching the human sleep peacefully and feeling his heartbeat?   
    
The phone he threw on the couch starts to ring, pulling Jensen out of his thoughts as he walks over and takes the call without looking at the screen.   
    
“Jensen,” Danneel chirps into the phone as soon as he picks up, taking him by surprise. He’s confused as in why Danneel is calling him until she keeps talking. “I found a missing call from you once I got home, I’m sorry. Did you need something?”   
    
He looks back at the corridor that leads towards the guest room. Yeah. He was the one calling Danneel, thinking about reporting the human before it was too late. Jensen had been wrong about lying to Alona, wrong about not reporting the young man to the _Security Division_.   
    
“Jensen?” Danneel insist after he says nothing, this time a little more concerned.   
    
“I—” Jensen whispers, holding his right hand out and watching his fingers flex. He had felt the guy’s heat steady, felt him alive right under his fingers. Jensen did that, he helped the human calm down as he spoke to him. And in that moment, the human didn’t feel any different from Jensen. It was just a second, but they were the same. And not only physically. Jensen felt him, and he didn’t feel like a threat.   
    
“Yeah, I called you,”   
    
“Is everything okay?” That’s not Danneel’s friendly voice anymore. Is not the happy voice that tells Jensen to find a hobby or make more friends whenever her visits are over and Jensen is walking her to the door. She’s using her accommodator voice now, and it makes something in Jensen snap out of it.   
    
“Yes.” He assures immediately. “It’s fine. I just wanted to let you know I have been missing work the past days. It was raining when I got home and—”   
    
“Let me guess, you got the flu?” Danneel finishes for him and Jensen is glad for that. So far he hasn’t told her any lies so he doesn’t have to feel guiltier about it. She’s just jumping to conclusions on her own and Jensen is not correcting her. Which is also not okay, but it’s better than straight up lying. “Oh, Jensen. I’m sure all the work you have been doing was too much to handle. Stay home as much as you need to, okay? I have told you to not overexert yourself,”   
    
“I’m trying,” Jensen answers, sitting on the couch and appreciating Danneel’s concern, even if he doesn’t deserve it. “I’ll go back to work soon as I can.”   
    
Again, not a lie. He’s just keeping details to himself.   
    
“You better not rush to go back to work. I’ll tell your boss to not let you stay if you still seem sick. Take some days to yourself and feel better, okay?”   
    
“Alright,” Jensen agrees, going back to stare at his hand. It’s tingling, and it feels warm. He wishes he could go back to the room and check on the human once more. “I’ll take the time I need before going back to the hospital,”   
    
The time he needs being the time the human needs. It might be all the same thing. Jensen just wants to keep his promise before calling the _Collectors_.


	5. Chapter 5

—Part Five—  
(Jared)

 

 

Jared wakes up feeling strange. He’s dizzy and his eyes are barely getting used to the light and all he wants to do is turn around and nuzzle against the pillow under him until he falls back asleep. He’s so comfortable, feeling like he has been sleeping on a damn cloud for days, body relaxed and muscles slack. Whatever he’s covered into smells nice, it makes Jared want to press his nose against it and take a deep breath. He’s confused, slipping in and out of consciousness as he moves under the soft blankets, still trying to put his finger on the weird sensation surrounding him.  
   
That’s when it hits him. He’s _comfortable._  
   
He’s sleeping in a soft, warm bed that smells nice. He’s not in pain, he’s not hungry or uncomfortable from sleeping on an old dusty mattress. His body doesn’t hurt and he’s not tired or waking up from a horrible nightmare. He’s fine.  
   
He feels _perfect_.  
   
It rings all the alarm bells in Jared’s head immediately, making him sit up, instantly startled and feeling out of place.  
   
This is too good to be true. Jared hasn’t been completely fine in more than two years, that’s what makes it strange. Jared can’t comfortable and safe anymore, he can’t have the luxury of it since the world went to shit.  
   
He rubs his eyes with both hands, pressing his palms against them as he tries to remember something from before. Anything beyond the warm bed in what looks like a common room. There are a few shards that flash in his memory, small parts of an entire puzzle that come and go the more Jared tries to get  his act together. Jared can still feel the ghost of the fever and intense stomach ache from days without any food. He can see Chad and Sandy, sneaking into a house and Chad shooting the gun. There was a horrible smell and splatter of blue. He remembers running. Crying and running from the hunters in white, thinking there was nothing else he could do. And then he was trying to get past a fence, and got hurt in the process.  
   
Jared brings his hand to his right shoulder immediately, suddenly remembering the sting of pain when he stabbed himself on the harsh metal. He pulls the short sleeve back so he can see the wound, hoping it’s not infected. He was too freaked out to pay much attention to it then but it hurt severely and he kept on bleeding. It can’t be good. And they don’t have any medicine back at the factory. But there isn’t a wound on his arm anymore and instead Jared can only find a small, pink line across the skin, completely healed by now, resembling a little scratch more than a stab wound after a piece of metal pierced through the flesh.  
   
He rubs his arm over and over again, finger ghosting over the small line as he tries to remember.  
   
There’s no way Jared imagined that amount of pain. He _did_ stab his arm, he was bleeding and it hurt too much to move at all. Just to test it, Jared presses down two fingers on the small scar, but there’s only a slight tingling feeling. No pain. Jared presses harder, convinced that he did some fucking damage on his muscle when he pulled forward to get past the fence. Nothing. Jared could be pressing down on any other part of his body and it would feel just the same. It’s like the wound the never happened.  
   
How is that possible? Jared could barely hold the rifle when—  
   
The rifle. Jared had to hold it up and aim because he had broken into a house. It had been raining and there was a mess in the living room, one of those things had been gotten close to Jared, and he had responded with aiming the rifle at it.. There was an alien in the house. And he looked like a man with green eyes that reminded Jared of his mother and the night she died. Jared didn’t shoot. He couldn’t have killed the thing even after Chad told him to do so of anyone got close.  
   
He looks around the room again, pressing himself further into the bed. He passed out in that house and now where the fuck is he? This doesn’t look like one of the facilities that Jeffrey had been describing. He’s not sitting down and he doesn’t have anything connected to him. There only seems to be a bed, a lamp and a closet in the corner. Furthermore, Jared is awake. Jeffrey kept talking about Hilary being passed out, impossible to bring back. Jared pinches his hand, just to be sure, and he feels the little sting of pain right away.  
   
Okay. _Alright_. This is not the time to freak out no matter how badly Jared wants to. He has stay level-headed and think. Jared’s awake and he’s _somewhere_. Not a facility but also nowhere he has been before. And the wound on his arm is gone along with his fever. _What the fuck is going on?_  
  
He has no idea how long he’s been out. Probably a long time if his arm is completely healed by now, right? Jared brings his hands up to touch his hair, trying to measure if it’s gotten any longer. It feels almost the same length like before, so unless someone had gone through the trouble to play barber shop with Jared while he was asleep, it doesn’t seem like he was out that long. There’s also the fact that he’s not clad in his own clothes anymore. Now that he has kicked the blankets off and he’s looking down at himself, Jared is realizing that he’s wearing a random shirt he has never seen before.  
   
It looks baggy on him, like it’s a couple sizes too big, and it’s clean and fresh. Like it came right out of the laundry room. Jared only wears old shirts that he can barely clean with water down by the creek close to the old factory. This is not his shirt and those are not his pants. A quick check lets Jared know that, alright, at least he’s wearing his own damn underwear.  
   
Did someone make effort to cure him and play human-sized Barbie with him? Things are starting to get beyond weird. Jared is kind of used to the world being populated by aliens that look like humans, so this has to be really strange for Jared to find anything weird by this point of his life. A quick check makes Jared realize something he didn’t notice before:here is some weird metallic bracelet wrapped around his wrist. It’s not heavy nor too tight, but a few thugs reveal that  it’s impossible to take off. Jared tries to pull it off of him, but it’s almost glued to his skin and no matter how hard he tries, he can’t take it off. Jared curses under his breath and gives up after ten minutes of trying, skin around the band already turning red from his desperate attempts to scratch the thing off. The bracelet looks harmless enough, he can worry about that later.  
   
There isn’t much to see in the room. It doesn’t seem to be a single window in there so Jared can’t tell if it’s day or night, the only light coming from the bedside lamp. It’s obvious that this place can’t belong to a human. People don’t live in houses anymore, at least not the surviving ones. It doesn’t seem to be the kind of place Jeffrey had described either. He said it had looked like  the setting of any _Star Trek_ movie. This isn’t it. So, where the hell _is_ Jared?  
   
He gets out of the bed slowly, approaches the only door—besides the one on the closet that he can’t seem to be able to open—and tries to listen if there are any noises coming from outside. Maybe those hunters in white are waiting for him to wake up to finally take him away. Is he locked down? The door doesn’t seem to have a handle, just like the closet. Maybe he won’t be able to push it open, but he has to try.  is better than waiting in that damn room to be taken down. He at least has to put up a fight. Jared might not be able to kill those things but he has to try to escape.  
   
He’s about to push the white door with both hands when he hears a sound coming from behind it: somebody is coming. Jared stumbles backward, almost falling down as he stares at the door in terror. There is a sudden, horrible beeping sound that starts to go off in the room. Jared gasps, looking down at the bracelet around his wrist when he realizes there are small red lights blinking on what was a harmless silver bracelet a second ago. And it’s beeping impossibly loud, going off like a car alarm. Jared groans, freaked out as he tries to claw the band off of him again. Did he activate it by getting too close to the door while trying to escape? What is that thing going to do to him if he attempts to get away? It could be a tracker, like a futuristic handcuff that keeps him in check. For a second he imagines the thing will electrocute him or even kill him before he realizes: the more freaked out he gets, the harder that thing beeps, making the sound almost maddening. There’s another sound outside of the room and the door slides open.  
   
“Holy shit!”  
   
Jared screams when he sees the alien from before walk into the room, making Jared jump backwards and press himself into one of the corner of the room, terrified. It’s the same one from before, Jared remembers his face. He’s still in the same house he broke into. It seems that thing kept Jared locked down in one of its rooms all along.  
   
And the alien is _there_. It’s right fucking there and Jared doesn’t have the rifle or anything to defend himself this time. Not that the firearm would have done any good, Jared knows by now he wouldn’t be able to put it to use anyway.  
   
.The thing seems to have stopped in its tracks as soon as Jared cursed out loud, standing frozen in the door as it stares back at him. Jared swallows and bites down onto his tongue, the beeping of the damn bracelet still going like crazy. He wonders for a second if he should apologize for trying to escape or swear that he wasn’t doing anything bad, that he has no idea why that bracelet is beeping. It doesn’t seem like a good idea to talk though, so Jared just presses his lips together and stays hunched against the wall, waiting for whatever the alien is planning to do with him now.  
   
There’s a long silence in which they only stare at each other, with Jared starting to shake as the wait for any reaction is driving him out of his mind. If that thing is going to do something to him, it should just go ahead and _do_ it instead of torturing Jared by making him wait for the hit.  
   
Then, to Jared absolute surprise, the alien takes a deep breath and starts to talk.  
   
“Are you feeling any better?” It asks in a soft voice and perfectly pronounced English. Jared’s eyes widen and he bites back another scream, throws his arms around himself in a futile attempt to shield himself instead.  
   
After another minute of silence and after it became obvious that Jared isn’t going to reply, the thing picks up the conversation again.  
   
“I didn’t meant to—” and then it stops, giving Jared a weird look for a second. “I thought you were still asleep, but then I heard the beeping,”  
   
Jared jumps out of his skin when the alien looks at the band on his wrist and then takes a tentative step into the room. If Jared was a cat he would have been scratching the walls and trying to climb them at this point. The pseudo-human must have heard Jared’s little whimper and probably noticed the way he tries to almost blend into the wall—pressing impossibly close to it—because he steps back again.  
   
“It’s fine. The alarm will wear off on its own in a little bit,”  
   
What is that supposed to mean? What will happen when it stops beeping? Jared looks at the bracelet nervously but doesn’t dare to ask. Why is that thing talking to him anyway? Why is it keeping Jared in here?  
   
There are so many things Jared wants to ask but he won’t. He doesn’t dare to make a sound, even less reply to the shifter. He’s well aware he has talked to some of them before. Brock back at NYU and some cashiers at small stores. They understand English, they are fluent in the language like this guy is proving right now. They understand it, Jared could communicate if he wanted to, but _fucking hell_ he’s not going to try. He’s too scared to consider responding at all.  
   
Another long silence passes and there’s a small sigh from the alien.  
   
“I’m Jensen,” It says while it crosses its arms and leans against the door frame. “What are you called? I know humans use first and last names, I have a last name of my own but it’s only for organization and data purposes. You can only give me your first name if you prefer, too.”  
   
Jared swallows and doesn’t say a damn thing in return. _Jensen_. Of course, they would have names too. Brock had a name and a last name, right? For organization and data. That doesn’t seem to make much sense but Jared is not about to question the way those things want to call themselves. The last thing Jared wants is to piss it off.  
   
Jeffrey said they were a pacifist race but the fact that this one kept Jared prisoner with some kind of freak bracelet that goes off as soon as Jared tried to escape says otherwise. The bracelet makes another high-pitched sound and Jared lets out a  strangled noise as the thing that called himself Jensen tries to step into the room again. There’s another sigh, but this time it sounds a little bit more irritated than the last one.  
   
“Fine, alright. I won’t come in,” _Jensen_ puts his hands up in a small gesture of surrender. “But at least tell me if you’re in pain or maybe hungry,”  
   
Nothing.  
   
That thing might want to play friends with Jared—something he can’t understand—but Jared is not going to reply to him. Why does it get out of its way doing this with him? All Jared wants to do is be left alone, far away from any of those aliens who took his family and probably his friends, too. He glares back at the alien in silence, almost waiting for it to try and come back in.  
   
After what feels like forever, _Jensen_ clicks his tongue and shrugs, like it completely gave up.  
   
“Let me know if you need anything,” And then he turns on his heels and leaves, door closing behind him.  
   
As soon as Jared is alone, the tears start to pour out. Within the span of a  second he’s sitting on the floor, still pressed into the corner of the room, hugging his knees as crying silently. All this time trying to run, always trying to survive and not let the hunters catch him just to end up here, prisoner of one of those fucking things. And he’s probably not the only one. He has no idea what happened to Chad and Sandy after they got separated. Did they make it to the empty house where they were supposed to meet? Jared hopes they did and that they also left when they realized Jared wouldn’t make it back. _Ever_. Trying to not think of the most likely possibility that Chad and Sandy got caught too makes Jared cry even harder. It was his idea to come into the city to look for food after all. He said they should risk it and come to Dallas and now look how everything ended. It’s all his fault. And maybe he got what he deserved.  
   
If Chad—the one who helped him survive all along and has been his best friend all his life—ended up in one of those facilities then Jared will never be able to forgive himself. He tries to clear up his tears, hiccupping and ignoring the constant beeping of the bracelet. He leans his head into the wall and looks up, hoping he could see the ruined ceiling of the old factory. Or even better, he wishes he could see the sunset and hear Chad and Sandy laughing next to him.  
 

  
 

—

 

   
   
   
The next time Jared wakes up, he’s not sitting in the corner of the room anymore.  
   
He’s back on the bed. And when he opens his eyes, he sees the alien right there, next to him while checking something on his arm. This time around, _Jensen_ seems to react before Jared even has a chance to panic, stepping away almost as soon as Jared wakes up and keeping a big distance between them. Jared presses his back against the headboard of the bed, looking down at his exposed arm, trying to find if Jensen had been doing something weird to him. It doesn’t seem to be the case.  
   
“You shouldn’t fall asleep on the floor,” The thing, which Jared is having a hard time thinking of more than _that thing_ or _the alien”_ even if he has a name now, says. Somehow, thinking of it with its name gives it a familiarity Jared doesn’t want to feel. “You just survived a severe pneumonia, doing that won’t help you get better,”  
   
Jared doesn’t say a thing in return, bringing the blankets up to cover himself, like they will keep _Jensen_ away. It stares at Jared for a long moment and for a split second, Jared thinks he can see disappointment in its expression. Like it was expecting more out of Jared. It confuses Jared as much as it pisses him off.  
   
He doesn’t owe that thing anything. If it wants a _thank you_ for curing him then _Jensen_ has another thing coming. Jared didn’t ask to be cured, just as much as he didn’t ask for his family to be taken away and being forced to spend the rest of his life running away.  
   
The silence goes on for minutes, until Jared turns around on the bed, facing the opposite side of the room while covering himself with the blankets. After a few seconds, he hears the door open and close again.  
   
Jared slips in and out of sleep throughout the day, hearing the thing walk in and out of the room every now and then, but never getting as close as he did when Jared woke up. There’s nothing Jared can do except for pretending to be asleep, letting the feeling of being completely defeated take over him. What’s the point of trying to escape anyway? At this point, if Chad and Sandy made it back to the house, they won’t be there anymore. Jared doesn’t know the way back into the old factory—Chad was the only one who had been in and out of there and he’s the one who guided them into Dallas. Jared could easily get caught trying to find his way back. And that’s considering the group will still be at the factory if Jared is lucky enough to find the place again.  
   
If Chad and Sandy made it back—and Jared prays they did, they idea of his friends getting caught too horrible to handle—and they informed the rest that Jared was caught so close to where they have been living, Jeffreywill want to move them immediately. A human being caught at Dallas stealing food would make the hunters in white want to check the perimeter to try and find out if there are more of them out there. It’s a risk too high to take. They had a whole life figured out back then and because of Jared they will have to get on the move again, risking their lives by leaving the factory. He presses his face into the pillow and wishes the damn thing out there would just kill him already.  
   
The fact that the room is closed up all the time and there aren’t any clocks or windows doesn’t let Jared know how long he has been in there. He’s either sleeping or sitting on the bed, staring at the walls and thinking of everything and nothing. He could have been asleep for days or only hours every time he wakes up, there there’s no way for him to know that. He’s silent every time _Jensen_ walks into the room, not answering no matter what it says. The alien seems to have given up on any kind of communication and learned to stay away from Jared so he won’t start freaking out again. The bracelet on Jared’s arm hasn’t beeped anymore, but there has been blue lights flickering for what Jared guesses have been hours.  
   
One time the alien comes back inside the room, it brings three bags of weird looking liquids inside plastic bags. He also has a bottle of pills that make Jared snap out of his constant haze as he starts to press further into the headboard.  
   
“You haven’t had anything to eat since you woke up.”  
   
Jared stares back, not even making a gesture to indicate that he understood.  
   
“You had an IV in while you were still asleep and the liquids  helped for the moment,” The thing leaves the three bags over at the end of the bed and Jared eyes them suspiciously. “You need to at least drink these if you’re not going to let me get close enough to do anything else. These are drinking supplements and these—” He shakes the bottle of pills in the air—“Are to make sure the pneumonia doesn’t come back. Take them with the liquids.”  
   
If he’s honest with himself, Jared is starving. But he knows how to handle hunger by now. He has survived days without eating before and he can take it now. There’s no way he’s drinking anything the alien brings him. Jared doesn’t even know if those are real supplements. They could be poison or something to make him fall asleep again. He has no idea what those bags have inside. He would be crazy to drink them.  
   
The alien sighs, already guessing Jared won’t touch them. Jared watches it rub its hands nervously before taking one of the bags and extending it towards Jared.  
   
“You were in such bad health when you broke in,” It whispers, and Jared has the feeling it’s saying it mostly to itself. “You will get sick again can you just—” It bites its lower lip and holds the bag in the air, right in front of Jared. _“Please?_ Please take it. It’s killing me to see you slowly starve yourself. _”_  
   
For what can only be a second, Jared feels a sting of guilt in the middle of his chest when he looks into the perfectly human features, the worry all over the alien’s face. It looks desperate. _Jensen_ looks desperate, keeping the bag in front of Jared with a slightly shaky hand. If Jared didn’t know better, he would think the alien is really concerned for him. Truthfully, one hundred percent concerned for his health and the fact that he might get sick again. It did cure him. It took away the fever and made the wound on his arm completely disappear. And it has done nothing to Jared just yet. Maybe it’s not lying about wanting to help.  
   
Without thinking, Jared extends his hand to take the bag but stops himself at the last second, pulling back and looking nervously between _Jensen_ and the bag.  
   
“It’s just supplements,” _Jensen_ pleads, and the hope of Jared taking it must make it forget that it’s better to keeps its distance, because t sits on the bed right next to Jared. “I’m a healer. I told you, it’s like I’m a doctor. I would never give you, or anyone, something that could do them any harm.”  
   
Jared is so hungry, and he feels so stupidly weak. Maybe that’s why he’s tired and sleeping so much. He doesn’t have the energy for anything.  
   
“Okay, let me—” The alien opens the lid at one side of the plastic bag, holding it with both hands before it takes two long drinks of the strange liquid. Jared watches it finish the drink in less than a minute, putting the empty bag away and offering a new one to Jared. “See? I drank it. It’s safe. It won’t do you anything bad.”  
   
It’s monkey see, monkey do. Which is a learning technique to use with little kids or even animals. Shifters do think humans are some kind of animals compared to them, don’t they? Jared would be offended if the dizziness and stomach ache weren’t killing him.  
   
_Who cares._ The shifter just proved there’s nothing wrong with the liquids by drinking them itself. Jared takes the bag from Jensen’s hand, slowly, both hands shaking around the bag once he’s holding it up. He ends up drinking the whole bag even faster than _Jensen_ did, only realizing how thirsty he is once he takes the first gulp. It doesn’t taste like anything specific. It’s like drinking water with a little bit of salt and sugar.  
   
Once he puts the empty bag down, Jared realizes the shifter has been staring at him the entire time, a relieved expression on its face now. Jared extends his hand, eyeing the other bag. Might as well go all the way if he started with one, right?  
   
He ends up drinking four of those bags and the shifter is delighted, looking at Jared like the sun has been shining out of his ass his entire life. It’s incredibly strange to say the least. What does the shifter care if Jared eats or not? They don’t have any trouble chasing them down when humans try to steal food from stores or houses. They didn’t have any trouble hunting all humanity down and locking them away like they were nothing more than cattle. What does this one care what the hell happens to Jared?  
   
“Thank you.”  
   
Jared looks up at the shifter, watching him pick up the empty bags, confused beyond belief. It’s giving Jared medicine so he doesn’t die of starvation but it’s the one thanking Jared for drinking it? Those things must really be insane. But hey., it did just help Jared. _Again_. So Jared gives it a little nod in return right before he turns around on the bed again, facing away from _Jensen_ and waiting for it to leave the room like all the other times. The only difference is that Jared doesn’t go to sleep as soon as he’s alone, too confused about what just happened to be able to even feel tired.  
   
After Jared accepted to drink those bags of weird water, it seems like _Jensen_ took it as an invitation to keep on bringing them to him every other hours. They are different colors but they taste the same, so Jared guesses they must be for different things. Whatever, they haven’t killed him yet and they take away the pain in his stomach and the constant dizziness, so Jared drinks them all without saying a word. It takes _Jensen_ a little bit longer to convince Jared to take the pills, yet the second demonstration of swallowing down a couple of them himself takes Jared’s worry away.  
   
The new energy from the drinks the shifter brings him gives Jared the opportunity to get out of bed and walk around the room, trying to check the closet doors to try and see what else is in there. He has seen _Jensen_ open them when he pretends to be asleep sometimes, yet whenever Jared tries to open them it’s like they are glued to the wall. His inspection of the room also lets him discover that the only door that does open doesn’t take him into a closet but inside of a bathroom. There's only a sink and a toilet inside but considering Jared hasn’t had a decent bathroom in over a year, it feels like a pretty big luxury. The bathroom also lights up when Jared walks in, just like the room with the bed. There doesn’t seem to be any switch anywhere so they must activate with movement.  
   
As time passes by and Jared gets used to drinking the weird liquids in the funny plastic bags and taking a pill whenever it’s due, he slowly starts to get used to calling _Jensen_ by his name or just _the shifter_ in his head, rather than _the alien_ and _it_ like he did before. It’s impossible not to when all Jensen has been doing is, somehow, take care of Jared.  
   
Jared has no idea why that is or the reason behind the white hunters not being there to take him away, so at first he tries to not think about it. But the more time he spends alone in the room without anything to do but sleep and stare at the four falls, it slowly starts to piss him off. Why is he in there? Why is the shifter helping him instead of just calling for the hunters? Why does he insist on making Jared eat as though he cares? He obviously doesn’t care—none of them gave a rat’s ass about humanity since they got to Earth. Is he keeping him alive so Jared can get healthy and he can start doing freaky experiments on him? What is that thing he put on Jared’s wrist? It doesn’t sound right. It can’t be right. Jared is not an idiot. He was able believe people helped others out of the goodness of their hearts once, but not anymore. Not after two years of hiding and running away. Not after losing his family and his friends. Not after waking up terrified day after day, scared of the idea of being taken away.  
   
And they are not even people. They are something else, that came to Earth and took it as their own. Jared can’t fucking believe this shifter doesn’t have some shady reason to keep him alive. Maybe feeding him like one feeds a turkey before Thanksgiving? Must be it. e gets so fed up with thinking about nothing else that Jared ends up opening his mouth one time Jensen is about to walk out of the room with another set of empty bags in his hands.  
   
“Why are you helping me?”  
   
The shifter stops right in front of the door and then turns around to look back at him, eyes wide and mouth hanging open, like he can’t believe Jared is finally talking to him. But Jared doesn’t give a shit anymore. He wasn’t going to make any communication with Jensen at all but what does it matter at this point? Jared is not going anywhere from here.  
   
“Why?” Jared hisses, closing his fists in his lap. “What are you getting out of making me better, huh? Why are you doing this?”  
   
“I’m a healer,” Jensen answers after a long pause, standing still in the same spot and still looking at Jared like he can’t believe his eyes. “This is what I do.”  
   
“Yeah, a healer. Big fucking deal,” That doesn’t mean anything to Jared. It doesn’t make any sense. They are not out there curing all the other sick and starving humans, are they? “When are you going to stop playing hospital and just kill me already? I’m done lying in this bed waiting for the moment you decide to go for it. Just do it!”  
   
He can’t believe he’s talking like that, that’s he’s saying those things without stuttering or starting to cry. It’s probably because the fear and confusion has been eating him alive for days and Jared can’t take it anymore. But Jensen takes in a sharp breath and looks back at Jared like he just said the most awful thing Jensen has heard in his life.  
   
“What?” Jensen says, shaking his head and closing his eyes for a second, like he didn’t understand Jared properly. “What? _Kill you?”_ And for the very first time since Jared crashed into the shifter’s house, he sees sparkle of anger in him as he raises his voice like he has never done before. “Why would I ever do such a thing! All I have been doing is help you so you can get better! I wouldn’t do anything—”  
   
“Oh sure,” Jared snorts and Jensen gives him an even more astonished and frustrated look. “I bet that keeping me hostage is helping me so much!” He yells, pointing at the bracelet around his wrist, who has stopped flickering those blue lights for a while now. Yet Jared hasn’t been able to take it off.  
   
The shifter rolls his eyes, a thing Jared hasn’t seen him do so far, before crossing his arms over his chest and shaking his head.  
   
“You’re not a hostage. Have I ever told you that you couldn’t leave or something like that? _No_ ,” Jensen snaps before Jared can answer. “I was helping _you_ after _you_ broke into my house and almost shot me.” It seems that from all the things Jared had done so far—refusing to talk, not thanking him for the help and trying to escape whenever Jensen gets close—accusing the shifter of wanting him to murder him has finally made him decide it’s enough.  
   
“Then what is this thing?” Jared shakes his arm in the air, pointing at the silver bracelet. “It beeped like crazy the first time I tried to leave the room! It’s some kind of tracker that will probably electrocute me if I try to leave.”  
   
“Are you out of your mind?” Jensen snaps again, and this time he sounds so incredibly frustrated it makes Jared shut his mouth immediately . “Are all humans like that or is it just you? That’s not a tracker, it’s a medical bracelet! It helps me knowing when there’s something wrong with your body. If your heart rate is too high it starts beeping, which is what happened that day. It lights up different in colors if your blood sugar or pressure is low or too high, if you haven’t had any food or if you have fever.”  
   
With his mouth hanging open, Jared stares at the bracelet. If he thinks about it, he was freaking out because he heard steps outside of the door before the thing started to beep. And it has been lighting up in different colors, which then stopped when Jared took the liquid supplements and when he started to take the pills regularly, too.  
   
“Oh,” Jared whispers, looking down at his wrist. He hears Jensen huff, clearly offended by Jared’s accusations, but Jared is not done yet. “Alright then, why can’t I take it off? Of course I would assume if it almost feels like some kind of futuristic handcuff.”  
   
Jensen looks for a moment like he might as well lose his patience, squinting at Jared for a second before moving closer to the bed. This time Jared doesn’t move away, but he sure tenses up at the sudden closeness between them. Jensen takes his arm and holds the wrists with the bracelet around it. And then, all he does is pressing down on one side of the bracelet for three seconds before it makes a soft click and loosens up, letting Jensen take it off of Jared.  
   
“Well, fuck,” Jared mutters, feeling like an idiot. “I had no idea you could take it off like that. It’s not my fault that I don’t know any better, you never explained what it was.”  
   
“Yeah, because you were so talkative before.”  
   
It’s only then that Jared notices has much he has been going on and on, like he couldn’t stop himself from arguing back as soon as they started. It’s hard not to. _Jensen looks so much like a human._ He resembles a human, he speaks like a human and even has reactions like a human would. He got frustrated and offended at what Jared said, he even rolled his eyes at him, for god’s sake. It’s like Jared’s brain just forgets at moments that he’s not dealing with a human anymore. That’s why he kept talking and arguing back, completely blocking out the fact that he never meant to communicate with the shifter at all.  
   
“You still haven’t told me why,” Jared whispers, looking down. He already broke the silent treatment, might as well ask Jensen all the things that have been eating him alive from the inside. “Why are you helping me?”  
   
_Why do you care?_  
   
There’s a long pause in which none of them says a word. Jared pretends to be distracted by the blanket in his lap, even if he takes keep peeks at Jensen from time to time. He seems lost in thought at this point, leaning against the wall and staring intently at the floor.  
   
“I have no idea,” Jensen says at last. It’s an answer Jared didn’t expect at all. “Honestly? I’m not sure. I mean, yes, I wanted to help you because you were sick and hurt. I’m meant to do that cure every creature on all planets I visit. I teach them how to stay healthy, I can make the pain stop. It would have been wrong to not do that for you.”  
   
Jared’s fingers ghost over his arm, reaching the little line across his shoulder, the only thing left after Jensen fixed up the gaping wound. There’s no muscle damage, no pain, no scar. Jared has no idea how he could have he done that so fast. It would have taken a surgery and months of therapy for Jared to recover under normal circumstances.  
   
“But—why keep you here? Why not saying anything? I’m still not sure myself,” Jared looks back up, swallowing as he hears Jensen talk. What does he mean _not saying anything?_ It’s a good thing that weird bracelet is off of him or it would be beeping away in that moment. “We have protocols, you know? Things we have to do when we run into humans and I have followed none of them. And I keep asking myself why and I…I don’t know. I look at you and I don’t know why I haven’t called the _Collectors_ yet.”  
   
Jensen lets out a sigh and shakes his head. “I guess I just wanted to make sure you were okay.”  
   
_The Collectors._ Jared has never heard that title before but he doesn’t need long to understand what it means. Jeffrey and everybody on the websites about conspiracy theories had the name wrong all along. They aren’t hunters, like they all thought. Because hunters kill, and Jeffrey said that shifters like Jensen don’t kill. They collect and take back to the facilities, and that’s the end of it. Collect, like kids collects stamps or postcards.  
   
Like humans are nothing but things they can store away after they have taken them down. Just as they did with Osric, and Chad’s dad and Jared’s family. Just as they are going to do now that Jensen has made sure that Jared is, in fact, okay. That’s why he was curing him all along, soo he wouldn’t feel guilty once he handed him over to the goddamn _Collectors_ dressed in those white clothes?  
   
Of fucking course.  
   
Why would something like Jensen care for someone like Jared, when they all consider humans nothing more than cattle that learns with monkey see, monkey do?  
   
It crosses Jared’s mind before he has fully thought about it. He doesn’t consider what he’s really about to do, images of him and Chad running through the neighborhood they grew up clouding his head. Jared remembers the fear coming off Jeffrey driving the car and telling them how Hilarie didn’t wake up no matter how many times he screamed her name. How humans don’t come back once they are taken away. And Jared really has no real reason to keep on fighting, not when he could be all alone. But the idea of being taken away by the things that have been tormenting him day and night for over two years makes him snap.  
   
He jumps out of the bed, snatching the bottle of pills from Jensen’s hand and shoving him away, trying to make it to the bathroom door. He doesn’t know if it locks from the inside, but he has to try. Death would be better than having to live with the nightmare of being hunted down.  
   
“No!” Jared hears from behind him, the scream almost desperate as Jared tries to push the door open.  
   
He doesn’t make it to the bathroom. One second he’s almost there and the next one he’s being pressed against one of the walls, wrists pinned down as Jared clings to the bottle of pills for dear life. Jensen is holding him against the wall, keeping Jared from moving or pushing him away like before. He looks desperate, breathing hard and applying more force on the hand that Jared is using to hold the pills. Jared takes a shaky breath, eyes filling with tears as he stares back into the green eyes he had been trying to avoid whenever Jensen walked into the room.  
   
“Please don’t,” Jensen pleads with a low voice, his own hands shaking as he keeps Jared pinned to the wall. It must mean he guessed what Jared was planning to do with the pills. Jensen said he was a healer, didn’t he? Yeah, a doctor would know. “Give me back the pills You don’t have to hurt yourself, _please_. _”_  
   
Jared shakes his head, starting to cry. “You’re calling them,” He whispers, feeling the tears on his cheeks. “T-They are going to take me away.”  
   
Gripping the bottle of pills harder than before, Jared squeezes his eyes shut and let’s out a sob, not caring that he’s showing weakness and fear in front of one of them. What does it matter at this point? Jared lost everything. Giving away whatever he has left of his dignity before losing himself won’t change a damn thing.  
   
“No. No, no.” Jensen whispers in front of him only pulling another sob out of Jared. “Please don’t cry. It’s—it’s going to be alright. You don’t have to do this.”  
   
But Jared doesn’t stop, crying bitterly and ignoring the shifter’s words. He only keeps on mumbling about being hunted down and taken to one of those places. He cried about running away and never stopping, about always being scared of the hunters dressed in white and the fact that Jeffrey’s wife never woke up after they took her. And now Jared is going to end like her too. And he shouldn’t give a damn, because he’s all alone and unable to survive on his own anyway. But he cares. He’s weak and scared and he cares so much he can’t stop crying.  
   
“If I die… if I take them.” Jared says between sobs, holding the bottle tight. “They won’t—they can’t.”  
   
“No, you don’t understand: I’m not calling them,” Jensen says, raising his voice so Jared can hear him over his own sobs. “I didn’t call them before and I won’t call them now! I swear to you, I swear—”  
   
“Everybody called them!” Jared snaps back, looking at Jensen’s worried face through teary eyes. “Everyone called them on u-us! They chased us down! I won’t let them—”  
   
“I promise. I promise I won’t,” Jensen softens his grip around Jared’s wrists but keeps him from trying to run into the bathroom again. “Remember the drinks and the pills? I said they were safe, and it was a true. I swear, I promise I won’t call the _Collectors_ if you let go of the pills and don’t hurt yourself. I’ll help you get better and let you go. _Please._ ”  
   
Jared sniffles, breathing hard and looking back into Jensen’s face. So much like a human and yet so different from all of them. He’s not behaving like any other shifters Jared ever ran into. Jensen has had all his time to call the _Collectors_ and he didn’t.  
   
“I promise. I swear on everything I won’t call them and you can leave when you feel better,” Jensen nods, sliding one of his hands up to take the bottle of pills. Jared lets go just for a second, lower lip trembling.  
   
“You could be lying,” Jared whispers, even if he really wants to believe him.  
   
“But I’m not,” Jensen whispers back. “Shifters don’t lie. Except I did. I lied to someone so I could miss work and stay here and take care of you. I haven’t lied in all my life and I did to keep you safe, even if I didn’t understand why.”  
   
Jared loosens the grip around the bottle pills, letting Jensen take them from him.  
   
“I could lie like I did with them, but I won’t. Because I want to help you, ” The only choice Jared has at this point is believing him. He can trust what Jensen is saying or fight to get the pills back and go into the bathroom. Jensen could be lying, Jared doesn’t know him. But his fever is gone, his shoulder is healed and Jensen is staring him with so much worry in his perfectly human face that Jared simply nods in return.  
   
After minutes of them standing there, with Jared pressed into the wall and Jensen holding his wrists to keep him in place, Jensen finally let’s go of him and steps back. Jared brings his hands up to his face right away, cleaning the tears from his cheeks and rubbing his eyes. There’s nothing else to say after that. Jensen promised to let him go once Jared is healthy and Jared believed him. So now they have some kind of deal, and only time will tell Jared if he was right or just made the stupidest mistake of his life.  
   
“You are free to go whenever you want to,” Jensen whispers after a while, bottle of pills secured in both his hands. “I recommend you wait until you’re all better. You’re still weak and recovering, so just wait until your body is ready. Then you can leave, but you’re not a hostage in here. Alright?”  
   
Jared nods, looking down at the floor and sniffing again.  
   
Jensen nods in return and mumbles something about Jared getting in bed and trying to sleep before he steps towards the door. He only stops once he’s at the doorframe, turning to look at Jared over his shoulder.  
   
“By the way, you don’t have to stay in the room all the time. You can come out, this is not a prison. You’re in my house, and from now on, you can think of it as your house, too.”


	6. Chapter 6

—Part Six—  
(Jensen)

 

 

  
It takes an entire day for the human to come out of the room.   
    
Jensen is still shaken from what happened the night before when he goes to offer him another dose of the liquid supplements, but he has to make sure the boy at least doesn’t sleep hungry. He makes a point to leave the pills behind this time, chest contracting whenever he remembers the look in the guy’s face when he took the pills and ran into the bathroom. How could he think that killing himself was the only choice? Jensen has heard about suicide before, from human books and records. That’s a concept unfamiliar to Jensen’s species and the thought process behind it still confuses Jensen to no end. He guesses it’s hard to understand when you haven’t been in such distress and sadness that you thought that death was your only choice.

    
Are _Collectors_ that bad? Jensen always had a completely different idea about them. They look for humans and take them away before they can hurt shifters or themselves. They don’t hurt the humans nor mistreat them. _Collectors_ are the gentlest shifters of them all. They have to do a dangerous task where they can get hurt, and they do it because they want humans to stop hurting each other, taking them to a facility where they can spend the rest of their lives happily suspended in a virtual reality. It’s the best way to deal with dangerous, murderous monsters. A merciful way to stop such a savage species from ending an entire planet and each other. Humans are happy in the facilities. They are happy and contained in a place where they won’t hurt anybody ever again.   
    
How can this guy think that dying is better than that?   
    
Jensen really doesn’t understand a thing about humans. He has been claiming to be an expert all along, but it’s just the physical part. He might never be able to understand the way they think. He had been so glad when his guest started to drink the supplements and take the pills, and then Jensen had been almost fascinated when the guy started to finally speak to him, but he never expected the human to believe Jensen had kept him prisoner. The idea was ridiculous and horrifying—shifters would never do such a thing. Why did humans had to think the worst of themselves and everyone around them? No wonder the guy didn’t want talk to him, thinking Jensen held him hostage.   
    
He lets out a sigh, working on chopping the ingredients for the sauce he’s using that night for the pasta he’s cooking. He’ll also do some Alfredo chicken now that he doesn’t have to go to sleep too early considering he doesn’t have to go to work for some weeks. Danneel had called him again, probably suspecting Jensen was acting weird and keeping things to himself, so Jensen _admitted_ he had been so sick he had passed out. Another lie to protect the human. How far would Jensen go for something he couldn’t explain to himself?

    
There’s a sound on the corridor that makes Jensen look up from the counter between the kitchen and the living room, finding the human standing there, looking like a scared cat and nervously glancing towards Jensen. Jensen had told him earlier that he could come out to eat if he wanted to. There’s no way the guy wasn’t getting tired of only drinking the supplements. Human taste buds were incredible and food tastes delicious on Earth. The boy surely missed that.   
    
“I’m making pasta,” Jensen announces loudly, not sure of what to say and worried he’ll scare the human back into the room for who knows how long. “And chicken. Do you want some?”   
    
There’s a long pause in which Jensen holds his breath and bites the insides of his mouth, wondering if being casual will only make things worse and make the skittish boy running back into the guest room.   
    
But finally, all the human does is give him a little nod.   
    
“Good,” Jensen cheers a little too loud, making the boy jump a little but not move away. Okay. That was too much. Jensen has been dying to interact in a less hostile way with the guy for days now and this is his chance. So he needs to calm down or he’s going to scare the guy again. “Alright. You can sit in the living room while I cook, I told you this can be your house, too until you get better.”   
    
Another pause and then another nod.   
    
Jensen goes back to chopping the ingredients, hoping that taking the guy out of the spotlight will make him walk further into the living room. It must be an entire minute of Jensen pretending the human is not there when he finally tiptoes into the living room and sits down on the couch facing Jensen.   
    
_Progress_. That’s good. At least he’s out of his room, but apparently he’s not talking to Jensen again. Humans are not only interesting but incredibly strange and a little bit frustrating.   
    
Jensen manages to finish the sauce, put the pasta on the stove and start cooking the chicken without the human saying a single word. He’s simply sitting there and watches Jensen move around the kitchen. Even the position must be uncomfortable, all stiff and barely leaning into the couch.   
    
“You know?” Jensen says suddenly, and he catches the boy jumping again on the couch, surprised by the sudden sound of his voice. It would be funny if it wasn’t a little bit sad that he’s still somehow scared of Jensen. “I thought we had passed the awkward silences? You sure went off on me, and while it was a bit aggressive, I was appreciating you finally talking to me,” Jensen clicks his tongue, going to stir the sauce heating on the stove right next to the pasta. “I was hoping we could keep on communicating, it would be nice if I could know how to call you too, but if you don’t want to speak to me maybe even that will be pointless. For a while I thought you didn’t speak any English, but—”   
    
“Jared,”   
    
It comes out soft and timid, and if Jensen hadn’t been paying full attention to the human he wouldn’t have heard him at all. The guy—Jared—takes a deep breath and looks up, finally stopping analyzing his nails like they’re the most interesting thing in the galaxy.   
    
“My name is Jared,” He repeats, a little bit louder this time. “And—” Jared seems to consider the next part, frowning. “I wasn’t aggressive before.”   
    
Jensen smiles a little bit, nodding along as he repeats the name in his head. Jared. Finally he can stop thinking of him as _the boy_ or _human_. He likes the name. So far, Jensen hasn’t heard it anywhere he has been to. The translation into Jensen’s mother tongue would also sound good.   
    
“I like your name,” Jensen replies, then shrugs when Jared makes a face. “What? It’s true. I have been to more planets that you can ever imagine, and nobody was ever named Jared.”   
    
Jared stares back, considering Jensen’s words for a long time. Jensen might just have given him a lot to think about, which is good. If Jared has questions then they  will keep him talking, and it will perhaps give Jensen the chance to pose some questions of his own. As long as he can keep Jared talking he might eventually convince him he doesn’t need to be scared of him.   
    
“Jensen is a human name,” Jared points out and Jensen nods again.   
    
“Yes. It’s the translation of the name my mother gave to me. It’s what  it would sound like in your language.”   
    
It’s not much information so far, yet it seems to be blowing Jared’s mind. Jensen doesn’t think that what he have told Jared is that interesting, just basic information. But he might not know a single thing about shifters and, well, Jensen was the one almost freaking out when he found a small annotation made by a human in a book a few nights ago. He’s not one to talk about inter-species fascination.   
    
“Why are you called a shifter?”   
    
“Well, I thought that would be a bit obvious,” Jensen raises his eyebrows, going to get some fresh lemonade from the fridge for dinner. “Our DNA is so far advanced it lets us change into any physical appearance we want.”   
    
“Anything?” Jared repeats, crossing his legs on the couch to sit a little bit more comfortably. Jensen suppresses an expression of delight. “So…if you want you could change into a cat right now?”   
    
“I could, potentially, turn into a cat, yes,” Jensen laughs for a second, shaking his head. “But not right away. I would need a sample of a cat’s blood and I would need to get the blood injected into my system. Then, my own DNA would pick up the characteristics of the cat’s DNA and I’d start to change. It’s recommended to do it at a health facility though, usually around other shifters who have already morphed into what I’m morphing into, so they can help me and guide me through how my new body it’s going to feel,”   
    
Jared is staring back at him with his mouth hanging open, but he doesn’t seem to realize he’s doing it. He keeps eyeing Jensen like he’s going to do it right away, just drop to the floor and start changing into a cat right in front of him.   
    
“It takes up to a few hours. And it’s a weird, tingling sensation,” Jensen keeps on going, serving the lemonade in two tall glasses. “So we usually sleep through it. We have special capsules to do it, so we’re more comfortable while the transition is happening. That’s why it’s also good to go to a facility to do it. It’s easier that way.”   
    
“So, anything?” Jared repeats, eyes wide. “You could turn into like—a shark?”   
    
“Why would I want to turn into any of those animals?” Jensen asks back, sounding amused. “They don’t have the intelligence, advanced nervous system or the sentient range that other species have.”   
    
“Well, I don’t know! It would be cool,” Jared shrugs, a little offended that his options aren’t appreciated. “If I could change into anything I wanted I’d like to shift into a wolf or something like that.”   
    
Jensen chuckles, unable to stop himself from comparing Jared to young shifters. They are all so eager to change into something new for the first time, to go explore a new planet and modify their bodies so they can do something completely different—like breathe under water or breathe fire. And that same amusement and eagerness usually makes the first choice always a poor one.   
    
“That’s because you have only seen the creatures here on earth, so your choices are reduced to what you know,” He explains, adding the sauce to the pasta once it’s ready. “If you could see the other species on all of the planets in the different galaxies in the universe, the last thing you would chose to be is a wolf.”   
    
When Jensen looks up, Jared has that fascinated expression on his face again. Well, he’s glad the conversation is interesting enough to keep him talking. They keep on a light conversation as Jensen finishes cooking their dinner, serving everything on the table and telling Jared he can come sit down when he just stares at the food from afar. During their chat there are moments where Jared goes silent and looks away, like he’s debating if he should keep on talking to Jensen, but it seems that so far they are doing well. Jensen doesn’t mind the breaks as long as Jared doesn’t go back to not speaking at all.   
    
“I’m really not going to poison you with anything I give you,” Jensen comments once he sits down, watching Jared hover close to the table. “I’m eating it too, you know?”   
    
“It’s not that,” Jared says with a little huff, still eyeing the food.   
    
“Are you not feeling hungry anymore?”   
    
There’s a loud growl that comes directly out of Jared’s stomach, indicating that’s not the case at all. Jared presses both hands over his stomach right away and Jensen can see a light blush spread over the human’s cheeks. Jensen wonders for a second if maybe he’s getting another fever. He knows redness on the face can indicate embarrassment, yet Jensen doesn’t think that can be it. Jared hasn’t had any solid food in a long time, even before he broke into Jensen’s place, and that sound is only a reaction of his body asking for it.   
    
“I haven’t—” Jared points to the food with one hand, shrugging. “I don’t get to eat food like that anymore. At least not for more than two years. It’s…” He nibbles on his lower lip, shrugging. “It’s weird, I feel guilty about it.”   
    
“Guilty? For eating?” Jensen repeats, frowning. Now that makes no sense at all. “Why? You were sick, you need it.”   
    
“Well, because—” he closes his mouth again seeming to think about what he was about to say and changing his mind. Jared breathes out, shrugging. “It feels like I shouldn’t take it from you. It’s not loyal.”   
    
“Why?”   
    
“Because you’re—you know, the _enemy._ ”   
    
It leaves a sour taste in Jensen’s mouth. The enemy. As much as they consider humans dangerous and a threat to the Earth, shifters have never considered any human an enemy. They don’t believe in that kind of thing. They don’t hate so of course they don’t consider anything or anyone their rivals. But Jensen guesses humans do. They were filled with anger and hatred for other humans who were different. Maybe they think everything they don’t understand is their enemy. This is why living peacefully among them like shifters have always done on all the other planets would have never worked out with humans.   
    
“Well, I don’t consider you my enemy,” Jensen replies, pointing at Jared’s plate again. “And it would be rude to throw away all my hard work to fix your pneumonia again by not eating.”   
    
Jared seems to consider it as he pulls back the chair and sits down, drumming his fingers on the table. “You’re just making up excuses so I’ll eat.”   
    
Jensen smiles around his fork after he takes a bite of pasta. “You caught me.”   
    
Jared swallows and then licks his lower lip, still looking at the food intently. Jensen is not sure what Jared has been eating all along. He mentioned something about not eating anything like this in over a year. No wonder he had been suffering from malnutrition and his defenses were practically non-existent. Jensen will have to make sure he keeps eating properly.   
    
“Look, you need the strength if you want to leave when you get better. And for that, you need to eat, right?” Jensen asks and Jared nods in return. “Okay, then you’re only eating this food to get better and leave. It’s all for survival. Sounds good?”   
    
“I guess, yeah,”   
    
_Humans_ , Jensen thinks, shaking his head. Honestly.   
    
At first Jared takes only a tentative bite of the pasta after taking a ridiculous amount of time to roll it around the fork. But after he tastes it, it’s like the levee breaks. Jensen swears that one second Jared is timidly taking a small bite of pasta and next moment he’s eating the chicken with his hands, ripping into it with his teeth and shoving all the food he can into his mouth. Jensen can’t help but stare, chewing slowly, as he watches Jared devour the food. For a moment Jensen even thinks Jared might start eating the pasta with his hands too because using the fork might take a little too long to get the food from the plate to his mouth.   
    
“Huh,” Jensen says, interested, watching Jared take a slice of bread and just put the whole thing into his mouth. “So do you all really eat like that? All the time?”   
    
“What?” Jared asks with his mouth full of food, frowning at Jensen. “What’chu mean?”   
    
“Well—” Jensen shrugs, cutting the chicken in pieces before eating it. “You guys invented cutlery. But you don’t… use them anymore?”   
    
“Dude, shove off,” Jared mumbles, chewing the food and looking down at his plate, cheeks blushing again. Jensen has no idea what _dude_ or _shove off_ means. He needs to make a note to look into that. This time Jared waits until he swallows everything in his mouth before speaking again. “I haven’t had a homemade meal in _years_. And I haven’t had anything good to eat in maybe two weeks apart from that salt-and-sugar water you gave me.”   
    
Two weeks. Jensen tries to not make a pained face. Has Jared been surviving like that all along?   
    
“I just got really excited,” Jared shrugs, taking another bite of his chicken, but this time eating it slower. “I was starving for so long. This tastes like heaven."   
    
“Oh, alright,” Jensen nods. He has never been starving in his life, but he guesses that two weeks of lacking real food would get him to that point of desperation to eat anything when the opportunity came up.   
    
“What did you mean by that?” Jared squints at him, taking another piece of bread. “God. You shifters really think we are some kind of wild animals, don’t you? I was really hungry but I don’t usually eat like this. I had manners before all of you took over our planet.”   
    
“ _Your_ planet?” Jensen repeats, interested by the choice of words. “How is this _your_ planet? It was here before humans evolved and took over. How can humans _own_ the Earth?”   
    
“Well…” Jared considers it for some minutes, chewing on his food and then taking big gulps of lemonade. He seems frustrated when he finally answers. “ _Fine_. Point taken, smartass. But you know what I meant. I didn’t eat like this before you all appeared and pushed us all away like we weren’t all living here first.”   
    
How is Jensen a _smartass_? He has no idea what that means either, but it doesn’t sound nice at all.   
    
“Yeah, you were living here first and killed a planet you thought you owned,” The fact that humans evolved first didn’t excuse them for everything they had been doing for ages. “Animals and plants were living here before humans took over everything, killing nature and pushing them all away with your constructions and contamination. You killed thousands of living creatures just because you wanted every inch of the Earth all for yourselves. How come it didn’t matter then?”   
    
There’s more silence as they both keep on eating, with Jared still a little too eager to devour as much as possible.   
    
“Well damn,” He says at last, shrugging. “I can’t argue with that logic. I’m not going to sit here and pretend we weren’t killing animals and destroying the planet with contamination, all for our own convenience.” Jensen is quite surprised to get Jared agreeing with him. He was almost expecting him to get mad at Jensen’s comment. “But hey, you didn’t answer before. Your kind really thinks we’re just a bunch of savages, don’t you?”   
    
Well, technically yes.   
    
Although right now Jared is not acting like that at all, Jensen had been told that humans were damaged beyond repair. They were all deadly and had evil inside of them, every single one, and keeping them around would only result in shifters getting hurt. And Jensen had seen enough evidence of that. And yet, in that moment Jared is not being dangerous or a threat to anybody, but he could eventually become one. Humans are like a ticking time bomb waiting to explode and show the worst of them at any moment. Any human can end up killing someone, any human can become a monster. It’s inside of them. All of them.   
    
Jensen looks at Jared, watches him eat, almost feeling sad that this is the reality. That this could be Jared, too. Jensen barely knows him but it’s depressing to think that even the guy he has been worrying about and helping along could end up doing all those horrible things Jensen read about.   
    
“Yes, we kind of do.”   
    
Jared huffs and shakes his head, bringing his eyes up to look back at Jensen.   
    
“That’s why you put us away the way you do. You think we’re _nothing_. Insignificant things you could just push aside.”   
    
“Not nothing or insignificant, no. We would never think that of any living being in the universe.” It’s a little hard to explain to a human in the flesh why shifters decided to do what they did. It was not an easy decision considering that colonizing planets is now their mission in life. This was an exception, because the harm humans were doing couldn’t be ignored. “Taking planets is not what we do, but it had to be done in this case. Humans were not right for the Earth or each other. Humans were too dangerous.”   
    
“And shifters aren’t?”   
    
Jared’s question takes Jensen by surprise. If there’s a species that’s not dangerous for anyone it’s them.   
    
“Of course not,” Jensen is even a little bit offended. He has done nothing but show Jared he wants to help him. They wanted to help all humans but they would have never accepted the help.   
    
Finishing his plate of pasta, Jared let’s out a little laugh, but it doesn’t sound like a real laugh. Jensen has heard about sarcasm but he doesn’t completely get it. The concept behind it sounds quite rude and unnecessary. Jared looks back at him, shaking his head.   
    
“Tell that to your _Collector_ friends,” He mumbles, and for a second Jensen remembers the way Jared cried in the room, gripping the bottle of pills and considering death over being taken away. “They have been giving me nightmares ever since I found out you all were real.”   
    
Jensen can’t think of anything else for days.


	7. Chapter 7

—Part Seven—  
(Jared)

 

 

    
Here’s the thing: Jared has really been trying to not get too comfortable with Jensen, in his house. Some days have passed since first he decided to step outside of his room, and things have been a little less tense ever since. Jared is still not sure what to make out of Jensen’s supposed help, but he guesses that staying locked in the room isn’t going to do him any good. While he wants to believe the shifter won’t call the hunters—or _Collectors_ , whatever, that name sounds even more creepy in Jared’s head—and won’t hinder him as soon as Jared feels strong enough to leave, but it’s hard to trust one of them after all this time of fearing them. He’s going to go along with it but not put his guard down. Jensen says he won’t do anything bad but there’s no way Jared can be sure. The important part is that as soon as he gets better, he’s gone. Jared keeps repeating that to himself day after day, especially when he’s around Jensen. He’s not staying any longer than he has to. Living under the same roof with a shifter is insane, but right now is a necessity. So Jared will play along for as long as is necessary.   
    
But after that, _he’s gone._   
    
Jensen keeps insisting on making sure Jared is eating properly, has been cooking all their meals so they have them together. No more weird liquid that tastes like salt and sugar for Jared. He feels guilty about eating like this while his friends back the factory starve themselves and can barely get bread and water It feels like some kind of betrayal, eating at the table with one of the shifters that ended life how they knew it. But Jared takes to heart what Jensen said: it’s a _necessity_ to get better and try and find them. It’s not because he wants to, it’s because he _has_ to.   
    
The shifter keeps checking on Jared’s health every now and then, making sure he’s truly getting better and giving him some shots to make sure Jared doesn’t get sick again. It takes them a whole day of Jensen offering him different things in exchange of Jared letting him administer the injections, with Jared barricading behind the couch and swearing he’s not getting a shot of some weird space medicine he doesn’t know of. Jared finally gives up when Jensen offers him to let him go over all the books in the house, and if he doesn’t like any of them, Jensen will bring him more from the library. Jared hasn’t read anything in such a long time, and the sudden fantasy of perhaps getting to read _The Lord of The Rings_ or _Harry Potter_ makes him give up.   
    
It turns out it wasn’t such a good deal. Most the books Jensen has are all about medicine. Big surprise, the healer only wants to read doctor books. Jared shoots Jensen a betrayed glare while he passes the pages of the tenth book that talks about nothing but the human body, rubbing his forearm even if the shot didn’t hurt at all. To be fair, they would be more painful when he would get them from a human nurse back in the day. But he’s not giving Jensen the satisfaction of letting him know that.   
    
“Would you stop that?” Jensen chuckles from the opposite end of couch, reading one of the books Jared already classified as _boring as hell._ “I know that the shots don’t hurt.”   
    
“You don’t know anything,” Jared mumbles, clutching the book with a huff. The more time he spends around Jensen, the more he realizes he really _is_ a smartass, even if the shifter insists on not knowing what that means. Jared is going to have to give him a lesson in slang, or it won’t be any fun to rub into his face how much of a smartass Jensen is.   
    
After all the books in the house end up being nothing but medicine galore, Jared asks if he can use the TV or Jensen he has any movies lying around. Jensen is more than glad to provide, teaching Jared how to activate the TV with his voice as he shows him the stack of movies he has waiting in the living room.   
    
But it also turns out that everything shifters do is a drag, even what they pass on television their shows are full of their _peace and love_ ideals. Their versions of sports are ridiculous. They play soccer without keeping a score and everyone wins for trying, all the players get medals at the end for participating. The opposite teams celebrate when the other does as well, congratulating them and praising their good job. Jared doesn’t think he has ever seen something so fucking boring in his life. Jensen seems to enjoy it deeply though, which causes a laugh attack in Jared until his stomach is hurting and he’s tearing up. He doesn’t remember laughing that much in a long time. The fact that Jensen doesn’t get for the life of him why Jared finds their version of all sports so boring makes it even funnier.   
    
The movies are even worse. They are all about happy from start to finish. No drama, no conflict, nothing. They are all happy stories, love stories, family stories. Two hours of everyone being happy and helping each other without a single discussion or problem. Jared falls asleep during two of them and asks Jensen if he doesn’t have any human movie around. Turns out he does, but they are only a couple of old _Disney_ movies. Apparently all the other human-made movies are banned because of their violent content.   
    
“So, if someone dies in a movie, you don’t keep it?”   
    
“Not if they are murdered. Natural death is understandable, but killing sends out a bad message.”   
    
Jared groans, falling back into the couch and looking at the ceiling as _Mary Poppins_ plays in the background. Unbelievable.   
    
“That’s ridiculous! Following that logic you can’t even keep _Bambi_ around because his mom gets shot by a hunter.”   
    
“Who’s Bambi?” Jensen asks, giving Jared that confused yet curious stare that appears every time Jared makes a human reference on Jensen’s face. Jared can’t even make fun of it considering he’s a sucker for every detail Jensen can tell him about shifters.   
    
“A deer whose mom dies because a hunter shoots her in the woods. It’s a kid’s movie.”   
    
“ _That’s_ what you make your kids watch?” Jensen asks, horrified, making Jared chuckle and shrug.   
    
“Hey! It’s a life lesson about how life is fragile and you can lose what you love the most at any moment,” If Jared thinks about it, that damn well applied to him. His mom got shot when Jared was a kid. He always hated that movie, but for personal reasons. Jared hated being Bambi.   
    
“That’s a _human_ lesson. Nobody would do that among shifters.” Jensen huffs, still trying to wrap his head around the idea of making little kids watch that. “Humans are so strange.”   
    
“Oh, we’re strange?” Jared asks, amused, sitting back on the couch and crossing his arms over his chest. “Really, mister _we-work-for-free?”_   
    
Shifters think humans are a bunch of barbaric assholes, Jared knows that by now. They think they are too dangerous, too evil, all the bad things in the damn universe. Yet, even if humans are horrible, shifters are fascinated by everything humans used to do. They find all their jobs incredibly amusing. Jared doesn’t understand how a creature can travel through space only to want to clean the streets. Jensen says it’s different on every planet and shifters like everything they are able to do on Earth. They all love their jobs and they all do it for free, which blows Jared mind. Jensen doesn’t have to pay for _anything_. He got this place for free when he got to Earth—which turns out didn’t used to belong to any human before, the house was new and nobody had moved in yet, which makes Jared feel better about living there—just like he got his car once he passed a driver’s test. He gets food for free at the store, he can travel for free if he wants to. And he works for free at a hospital as a healer.   
    
Jared can’t believe it, but Jensen insist it’s all for the community. They work for each other and they are happy to do so. Jensen would never dare to charge anyone for helping them cure their illnesses. He’s happy to make someone feel better, just as other shifters are happy working was waiters at restaurants or being cab drivers for the shifters who are too nervous to drive. They get everything for free so they do everything free in return, all to help the others. They are all the same, they are all equals, and they all care for one another like a big family. They are not greedy so they never take more food than they need from stores and they are not selfish so they don’t use other shifters’ kindnesses for their benefit.   
    
“Well, look at you with your perfect little society,” Jared mumbles as they eat popcorn, watching one of Jensen’s movies. A shifter one. Because shifters work at everything humans did—at least the normal jobs, nobody is out there working as a hitman—even at being actors of boring movies with no drama. “Doesn’t it give you the chills sometimes? Aren’t you a bit suspicious?”   
    
“Of what?” Jensen doesn’t seem to get it, now more concentrated on their talk than the movie. He’s the alien who travels through space and yet he always seems interested in their talks. It feels so strange. Jared is _just_ a human. He can’t be that interesting.   
    
“Well, everyone always being happy and perfect. I’m sure it must be tiring to be just _alright_ all the time,” Jared tries to explain, eyeing Jensen. “Someone being nice all day, all the time, no matter what sounds almost creepy. Don’t you think they might snap sometime?”   
    
Jensen seems more confused by this than anything Jared has said before.   
    
“No. Absolutely not, nobody would ever snap or anything. There’s nothing wrong with keeping away all the bad emotions that will only hurt you and others.”   
    
“So you’re telling me you have never been mad in your life?” Jared asks, clearly suspicious. “Ever? That’s impossible.”   
    
“Of course I have been a little annoyed every now and then. But nothing that harsh,” Jensen takes the coffee from the table in front of them, giving it a long sip. Another thing Jared doesn’t get about Jensen is how he can drink his coffee burning hot and without a single spoon of sugar. “Not to the levels of anger humans get to. Not _murdering_ anger,”   
    
“Oh, come on! That’s ridiculous, not all humans get to the point of _murdering anger_  either,” Jared says, shaking his head. “I have never been so mad I killed someone, you know? I’m aware that everything we have done here doesn’t give us the best credit about not all humans being bad. But we aren’t.”   
    
“The thing is that all humans could potentially do bad things if given the circumstances.”   
    
“And so can you,” Jared argues immediately. Yes, he guesses if pushed to an extreme everyone would become violent. Chad would have never shot that shifter if the situation wouldn’t have called for it, he didn’t even used guns for anything else than going hunting with his dad before. His best friend wouldn’t have shot a random person just _because_. It’s all relative. Shifters see the world in black and white when Jared is sure you can see it in a certain gray scale.   
    
“No, we can’t. Shifters can’t do any bad no matter what. We’re not like humans.”   
    
“That’s bullshit,” Jared groans in return, a little pissed off. It doesn’t help that during those discussions only Jared gets irritated while Jensen remains perfectly calm. It doesn’t prove the point that humans are way more volatile than shifters. But _still_. Bullshit.   
    
“No, it’s not,” Jensen gives him a little smile, taking a sip of his coffee. “We’re simply different.”   
    
“Yes, yes. Humans are monsters and shifters are perfect, yadda yadda,” Jared shakes a hand in the air, tired of hearing that over and over again. “But that’s only because you have lived in your perfect little bubble all along. If shifters were pushed to the limit,  you all would snap like any other human would. It’s natural. Everyone can get to that point.”   
    
Jensen clicks his tongue, setting the coffee back on the table. Jared smiles to himself, proud that he’s at least getting a bit under Jensen’s skin. Their discussions are mostly about what they disagree about as species and it’s somehow fun to debate. Jensen seems to be right, which can become annoying, so Jared likes when he says things that he can tell leaves Jensen thoughtful. It could be nice if he could at least convince Jensen that not all humans are killers in the process.   
    
It kind of bothers him that Jensen would even see _him_ like that, too.   
    
“I don’t know. I don’t think so.” Jensen says at last. “I doubt we would react like a human during a dangerous situation. We would never use violence as an answer.”   
    
“Well, I didn’t shoot you that night, did I?” Jared throws back, arching both eyebrows. “Reacting like a human would have been shooting you, right? And I didn’t do it. Which shows not all of us are like your kind thinks.”   
    
There’s a long silence after that, making Jared wish he hadn’t brought that up. So far none of their silences felt awkward, for some reason Jensen seems to be one to enjoy silence and never presses Jared to keep on talking, waiting for him to feel comfortable enough to speak up whenever he wants to. This time it’s different. Jensen has his cup midair, eyes fixed on Jared’s face as Jared looks away, trying to hide his face behind his bangs. From all the things they have discussed so far, the day Jared broke into the house is not one of them.   
    
“Why didn’t you?” Jensen asks at last, and even if he’s trying to seem as calm as always, Jared has been used to his voice and his face from days of only interacting around him. He can hear the change in Jensen’s voice. He wants to know the answer more that he’s showing.   
    
“I’m—” Jared nibbles on his lower lip, playing with his hands nervously. Maybe it’s a bad idea to tell Jensen. Sure, so far he has been nice and hasn’t done anything bad to him, which is basically a miracle considering what shifters usually do with humans. But what if something happens. Jensen promised not to call the _Collectors_ but what _if_.   
    
If Jared tells him the reason he didn’t shoot him that night, all his possibilities of ever having any self-defense are gone. He has eavesdropped on Jensen a couple times when he thinks Jared’s asleep. Slipping out of his room and tip-toeing to Jensen’s door when he hears him talking to someone else. The two times it has happened, it had been with someone called Danneel. Jensen had explained earlier that he has something called an _accommodator_ but Jared still doesn’t get the concept of what that is. Jensen has only spoken twice with Danneel these days and it’s been about work and Jensen’s health. That’s it. He has kept his word of not telling a soul about Jared being there.   
    
He looks up again, finding Jensen watching him intently. There’s that worry on his face again. The same he had when Jared tried to snatch the pills from him, the one he had when Jared refused to take any food at first. Like he _cares_. Jared understands for what Jensen has told him about shifters that they basically love everything in the universe, they care for everyone and all that stuff that Jared still finds kind of fake and sketchy. Jared doesn’t know if Jensen caring for him specifically is remarkable at all or if he simply cares for everything and everyone he has ever met.   
    
“I have been wondering ever since that night,” Jensen fills in the silence, surprising Jared. “Why didn’t you shoot me? Why did you look so scared? I have been living longer than you can imagine, and nobody ever looked at me the way you did that night.”   
    
“I’m scared of shifters,” Jared whispers in return and he watches Jensen’s face shift into a pained expression just for a second. “They took away the rest of my family, they took away my home and my friends. They made me lose everything I had left. I’m scared of being taken away day and night. For more than two years I couldn’t think of anything else but that. You say shifters are pacifists but they have made my life a living hell.”   
    
Maybe it’s not fair to talk to Jensen like that, not when he has been helping him for days now. But he wanted to know, so there’s the answer. Jared has at least the courtesy to change the pronouns from you to they so Jensen doesn’t feel as targeted.   
    
“And I’m—I’m afraid of guns,” He adds after Jensen does nothing but stay silent. He looks down again, pretending to be too fascinated by his nails. What does it matter? Even if Jensen decided to betray his word, which is not likely so far, Jared has no idea where the rifle is. He breathes in deep, feeling his nose tingle and his eyes fill up. “Because one of those took away my mom.”   
    
Jensen makes a noise in front of him, something that sounds like the intake of a sharp breath, probably horrified about this new detail about what humans are capable of, just like he has been about everything else.   
    
“Y-Yeah, because humans… we’re not fucking perfect like you shifters, you know?” Jared whispers, closing his hands into fists. “Because you’re right there. There was evil and bad people all around before you got here. And I should know that better than anyone.”   
    
How many times has he cried in front of Jensen so far? Jared is pathetic. But it doesn’t matter. He has never been ashamed to cry because of his mom. And that’s not going to change because some alien from another galaxy is there.   
    
“And sure, for you it’s just another proof that humans are monsters. It’s just another thing you can think about when you try to list the reasons why taking over Earth was for the best,” Jared looks up, cleaning the tears from his cheeks as he stares into Jensen’s eyes. Now that he’s close enough and Jared can really pay attention to them, they are not exactly the color of Sherri’s eyes. They seem alike, but Jensen’s are much clearer. “For you it’s just _another_ horrible thing a human did, but for me it’s _everything_. It changed everything for me. It was _my mom.”_   
    
Sherri was all the friends Jared could never make when he was little except for Chad. Sherri would lay on the pillows under Jared’s blanket fort and read to him. She would look for monsters under Jared’s bed and bake him his favorite cookies when he was feeling sad. She knew when Jared needed a hug and knew how to tickle Jared better than anyone. She made Jared smile with just being there. She made him feel safe whenever he was scared. And someone took her away from Jared and his dad and his brother and sister just because they wanted to sneak into the house to steal some money and their new TV. It was different to lose his dad and Jeff and Megan from how he lost his mom. But for Jensen it’s all the same. Jared can talk and talk and he’s not going to get how this feels because to him humans are nothing but monsters that need to be locked down for ever.   
    
“And you probably don’t even get it,” Jared whispers, still keeping eye contact with Jensen, who hasn’t said a word. “You and your perfect society with only goodness. You don’t know what it’s like to get someone you love so much being taken away from you like that.”    
    
He stands up, suddenly mad and frustrated that he even started talking about this. He doesn’t like to discuss this with anyone in the first place. Jared had always felt they will ever understand. Nobody was there, nobody else got her last kiss or her last smile. Nobody heard it happen and still hoped to hear her voice calling their names. And now Jensen—he’s going to understand even less. He doesn’t get human suffering because he’s not even a human in the first place. Jared has been talking with him watching movies together, slowly getting used to Jensen’s company and also forgetting at moments that no matter how much he looks and behaves like human, he’s not one of them.   
    
“You don’t understand what it feels to know you will never see them again because someone killed them like they were nothing,” Jared groans, rubbing the tears away from his face once again. Jensen is up on his feet too, standing in front of Jared and still saying nothing. Jared is crying his eyes out and he has nothing to say. Of course not. He doesn’t get it. “Like they weren’t good and sweet and would sing to me at night when I couldn’t sleep. You think me and every other human are walking garbage, but my mom wasn’t! And she was still killed while I was hiding in the closet waiting for her to come back, but you don’t know—”   
    
He feels a sudden pull on his arm and the next moment he has his face pressed into the space between Jensen’s neck and his shoulder along with Jensen’s arms around his waist. Jared let’s out a surprised gasp, eyes widening as he feels the sudden warmth coming from Jensen’s hug, who uses his arms to gently press Jared even closer to him.   
    
Two days ago they had discussed human closeness. The touching, the reaching out, the physical contact. Jensen has said he wasn’t used to it yet. He saw it in romantic movies and read it in books about love. Shifters don’t express their love with their bodies, rather with their feelings and actions. They show they love one another by caring, helping and being there when needed. When morphing into other bodies after travelling to different planets they have learned each species’ way of showing their emotions, all different and special. But none like humans do. Holding hands, stroking someone’s face, hugging. It’s all new and different and Jensen admitted he wasn’t always comfortable doing it with other shifters, arguing it felt strange to embrace someone, pushing into their personal space and using their bodies to show they cared instead of words.   
    
And now he has his arms around Jared’s back and is holding him close, not moving away even if Jared hasn’t hugged him back. For a second, something in Jared’s head tells him to pull away, tell Jensen to not touch him. But he also knows he doesn’t want that. The contact feels nice, it has the effect of making him feel better almost instantly. Jared is a touchy person, has always been. He likes all the things Jensen doesn’t get from romantic movies. The light touches, fingers tangling together. The kisses.   
    
Jensen hugs him and Jared doesn’t want to pull away. It doesn’t matter what Jensen is. All Jared wants to is lean into the touch, tears still sliding down his cheeks. So, he does. Jared presses his face against Jensen’s shoulder and lets out another sob. He doesn’t wrap his arms around Jensen but he doesn’t need to. Jensen gets it, holding Jared even tighter than before as Jared cries bitterly.   
    
“You’re right. I don’t know.” Jensen mumbles close to his ear, one of the hands on Jared’s back slowly rubbing up and down. Jared hides his face into Jensen’s neck, sniffing. There goes all efforts of not trying to get close or comfortable to Jensen. Jared just quite literally sent that  promise to hell.   
    
Fuck. Who gives a shit. Jared really needs the comfort.   
    
“I’m sorry, Jared,”   
    
He nods, body so close to Jensen’s he can almost feel his heart beating in his chest. “It’s fine. It’s not your fault.”   
    
How could it be? Jensen is not one to blame over his mother’s death or the fact that Jared doesn’t trust anyone to talk about the topic. He has always felt this way, this is not only about Jensen being a shifter. Jared has always thought that nobody could ever get the infinite pain he feels in the middle of his chest whenever he thinks about Sherri.   
    
“Well, I’m still sorry,” Jensen insist and Jared smiles a little bit, feeling his tears fall on Jensen’s shirt. “I’m so sorry it happened in the first place. I’m sorry you have to deal with a pain I can’t even begin to imagine.”   
    
Shifters care for everything and everybody. But Jared thinks maybe Jensen doesn’t have to care this much. Doesn’t have to care to the point of always trying to make Jared feel better and worrying about him this much.   
    
Jared closes his eyes and for a second hopes it’s true. For a moment thinking that Jensen cares because it’s _Jared_ and not because it’s in his nature actually makes the pain in his chest ache a little bit less.   
    
“Thank you, Jensen.”   
    
It could be Jared’s imagination, but he thinks that after he says his name out loud for the first time, Jensen’s heart rate speeds up a little bit.   
    
    
 

 

—

 

 

    
The line has been crossed. Jared knows that, Jensen knows that. There’s no going back from there. The invisible space that kept them apart was broken the moment Jared over-shared one of the most important things in his life and Jensen offered the physical comfort he didn’t understand but knew Jared needed. It’s done. Jared can’t behave the same after hugging the shifter and crying in his arms.   
    
Absolute offense to the human race: Jared can’t pretend to dislike the enemy anymore. And to add insult to injury? Jared doesn’t even consider him an enemy anymore.   
    
He’s just _Jensen_ now.   
    
The best part of all of it must be Jensen not tip-toeing around Jared or pretending that it never happened in the first place. Jared always hated whenever anyone who knew him would act like he needed to be treated like he was about to break after he expressed any feeling over losing his mom. Jensen straight up asks him the next morning how he’s feeling and if he wants to talk about it more or to let it go. He wasn’t behaving any different or talking to Jared like he was a scared animal. Maybe one of the good things about shifters is that they don’t behave like humans. Perhaps that not _always_ so bad.   
    
The two of them being so different also helps with the fact that being inside the house all day doesn’t become incredibly boring. Jensen always has something to ask Jared and the feeling is mutual. Jensen is an alien and Jared gets to sit down and ask him whatever question about the universe, advanced technology and anything he wants. How many humans ever had such an opportunity? Maybe Jared is the only one. Sometimes he feels like the stories he has in return for Jensen are not as interesting. You can’t compare Jensen telling him about living on a planet completely covered in water and basically being a goddamn merman to Jared’s high school years.   
    
Yet somehow Jensen seems fascinated by lockers and band practice. Are shifters honestly that into everything humans do? Sure, they don’t care for the bad parts, but come on. Hearing Jared talk about the time he won a trophy in a spelling contest can’t be _that_ amazing.   
    
“There’s no way you can make remember all the words I had to spell. I barely remember the whole thing,” Jared groans, lying down on the couch as Jensen cooks them lunch.   
    
All the windows are closed and currently projecting the image of a nice summer day on the beach outside. Turns out the windows are some kind of screen too and you can change the view to whatever you want. They just tint black on the outside when activated, helping Jared to stay hidden away from Jensen’s neighbors. He discovered just days ago that his room _did_ have windows all along, but Jensen had used the screen version to make them seem like they were also part of the wall and nobody could see the sick human lying down on the bed.   
    
“I have told you many stories with all the details you wanted.”   
    
“Yeah, well, that’s because your stories are actually _good_ stories. We’re talking about a stupid spelling contest when I was younger.” If Jared could fly to Venus and turn into whatever the fuck they have there he would remember every single detail too.   
    
“I don’t think is stupid. You won, didn’t you?”   
    
“Yeah, but it was years ago.”   
    
“So?”   
    
Jared sits up, finding Jensen leaning on the kitchen counter and looking at him, head tilted to the side while the soup boils on the stove.   
    
“Well, things you did as a kid don’t seem to matter once you grow up.” Jared shrugs, not sure how to explain it any better. “You know, everybody won something when they were little. It’s not a big deal.”   
    
“Not everybody,” Jensen corrects, frowning for a second. “I didn’t. Nobody I met before on more than ten planets ever did. You’re the first creature in the universe I ever knew who did that.”   
    
“Well, yeah, because they don’t have spelling contests on Mars.”   
    
“Exactly. But they do have them here on Earth. And you won one of them, that’s amazing. Don’t you see it, Jared?” Jensen asks and he looks actually surprised about whatever he’s talking about. Jared shakes his head in return. “You did that. All you have done until now, the combination of things you have lived, only you have done it all that way. There’s nobody else like you in the vastness of this galaxy and all the others around us. You are unique, Jared. I think everything you are is a big deal.”   
    
Jared blinks, staring back at Jensen as he feels a weird knot in his throat, face starting to burn. He well knows shifters don’t see things the same, of course, but... _Alright_. Jared never had anyone say something like that to him. He opens and closes his mouth, feeling his face heat up even more. He’s unique? Everything he does is a big deal?   
    
“You do know you are like walking inspirational poster, do you?”   
    
Jensen frowns. “I have no idea what that’s supposed to mean.”   
    
“Do you tell that kind of stuff to everyone you bump into?”   
    
“Not everybody, just to the humans,” Jensen replies after a heartbeat, raising both eyebrows and shrugging at the same time. Jared smiles, big and proud, nodding along.   
    
“Oh look, someone is getting better with his sarcasm. Good for you!”   
    
“After travelling through the universe, learning sarcasm is sure my biggest accomplishment.” Jensen answers back with a similar smile, making Jared laugh and throw his head back, falling onto the couch once again.   
    
“I have created a monster,” He chuckles, shaking his head. Explaining things like slang to Jensen, the meaning of curse words and beyond had been a little frustrating at the start, but nothing paid off like teaching him to use and detect sarcasm. As the smartass Jared sensed Jensen is, he was quite quick on picking up that one.   
    
“Good to know I taught you the wonders of outer space and the stars while you teach me spoken mockery,” Jensen clicks his tongue from the kitchen and Jared laughs some more. “ _Humans_.”   
    
 “Yeah, yeah. You don’t have to worry much. As soon as this terrible human is healthy and can leave, you won’t have to deal with such a monster ever again,” Jared waits, hands behind his head, expecting Jensen to come up with another smart answer in return. But he doesn’t. There’s nothing after Jared’s last comment, which makes him open his eyes again and sit up, expecting to find Jensen leaning on the counter like before. Instead, he’s facing the stove and away from Jared, stirring the soup and staying dead silent.   
    
“Jensen?”   
    
There’s no answer.   
    
Biting his lower lip, Jared lays down on the couch again, staring at the fake view of the ocean outside the window, breeze making the leafs of the palm trees wave in the air.   
    
For the first time since they have started to eat together, Jensen doesn’t say a word during the entire meal.


	8. Chapter 8

—Part Eight—  
(Jensen)  
 

 

  
   
There’s one thing about humans that no book or shifter ever explained to Jensen.  
   
You get attached to them.  
   
They—or perhaps, just Jared—grow on you at an alarming rate. Jensen is almost a little bit worried to admit to himself that he feels more comfortable around Jared than he has felt with many shifters on many different planets. He has met different creatures and species throughout his life but humans— _yeah_ , humans are something else.  
   
Or, again, perhaps that’s just Jared.  
   
What had started as pure scientific curiosity has been growing out of proportion way too fast. For moments Jensen wonders if that’s even more dangerous than Jared behaving like the violent human all shifters believe they’re supposed to be.  
   
Jensen can’t get attached to Jared. He just can’t. It’s a bad idea from beginning to end; it would bring negative consequences for both of them and wouldn’t do him any good at all. Jensen is helping Jared because he was hurt and sick. Then he made a promise to not call the Collectors so Jared could easily run away when he felt better. And now they are just waiting for that moment. But of course, spending so much time together while they wait until Jared leaves has made them unlikely friends of some sort. But it can’t go beyond that.  
   
He really can’t get attached to the boy. What’s even getting into his head? Jensen been visiting planets for years in all the galaxies and he can count on one hand the number of creatures he has become friends with, most of them shifters just like him. He has lived on planets for years without feeling any kind of remorse about leaving behind the ones he met when it was time for him to travel again.  
   
He’s spent mere weeks with Jared. _Weeks_.  
   
Jensen is being ridiculous, fascinated with being able to interact with someone no other shifter can. What’s the point of getting attached when Jared has made it more than clear he wants to leave? Jensen is being nonsensical when he has always prided himself of how sensible he usually is.  
   
It’s probably the human parts of his brain and body, being locked up for so long alone with Jared, making barely any contact with anyone else from his species, that  has been making him behave like this. As soon as he goes back to work, things will go back to normal and Jensen’s head will be back in the right place.  
   
But leaving the house also means something else: Jared could be gone by the time he gets back.  
   
He’s not completely recovered yet, but he could leave anytime if he really  wanted to. And like Jensen told him, he’s not a prisoner of any kind and he’s within his rights to go back to whatever he was doing before breaking into Jensen’s house. They haven’t touched that specific subject—where Jared was before they met and how he ended up in Dallas—and it seems like Jared prefers it that way, so Jensen is making sure to not push him to talk more than he wants to.  
   
Jensen is definitely not calling the Collectors on him. Not now; not ever. It seems like a once in a lifetime opportunity to run into a human who doesn’t want to attack a shifter and so far hasn’t harmed him in any way, but even if Jensen did again, he wouldn’t make the call to the Security Division.  
   
Not after seeing how terrified Jared is of being “hunted down”, as he likes to say.  
   
He tried to explain to Jared how Facilities worked two nights ago before while they chatted in the kitchen drinking something warm. Jensen had dark coffee while Jared preferred incredibly sweet chocolate.  
   
Jared has some comprehension of what happens once humans are taken away by the Collectors. How he knows, Jensen isn’t sure, since Jared avoided explaining that part too. All Jensen can guess is that Jared had heard it from someone else, yet that also seemed unlikely considering Jensen knew it was impossible for humans to escape once they got connected to the VSR. _Virtual Simulated Reality_ : the missing piece of the puzzle Jared didn’t seem to have before.  
   
Humans are connected to it once they are collected. The VSR basically functions like a brain, in which the humans themselves would make all the neuronal connections. Any person connected to this central brain would wake up in their own worlds, with their lives going back to normal, not remembering ever hearing about shifters or the moments prior to being taken down. They would go back to living their lives, doing what they would have done every single day, but it wouldn’t be real.  
   
Shifters constructed the VSR so humans would have a place to live without ever hurting anybody or anything: inside their own heads.  
   
Jensen had tried to explain to Jared how the VSR worked, creating a virtual reality out of the life each human already had. The technology to create it was provided by shifters and the pieces and details to make each reality believable was provided by the humans. They would spend the rest of their lives happy, growing older without ever knowing that what they had been living was only a simulated reality.  
   
It always seemed like a really merciful way to deal with humans. Or so Jensen thought.  
   
Jared had absolutely lost his mind when he found out about it though, even more scared than before, now that he had the details. Jensen had regretted telling him almost immediately.  
   
Jensen didn’t know what was so bad about keeping humans happy while being sure they wouldn’t hurt or damage anything else on Earth. In their heads, life would keep on going without a single change. They would experience it all, the central brain advanced enough to let the humans experience all the sensations they were used to. If someone was being touched in the virtual reality of their own minds, the human would feel the fingers stroking their cheeks, they would experience the tingle in the base of their stomach. There’s no way a human would be able to tell the difference between their real lives on earth and the simulated realities they were now connected to.  
   
Opposite to Jensen and all shifters now living on Earth, Jared found it horrifying, arguing that a fake life wasn’t worth living.  
   
Jensen had tried to explain that it wouldn’t be a fake life. The computer would simply use all the information from each brain and recreate the exact life the human had before, letting each of them experience said life with problems, happy and sad moments, surrounded by the ones he cared about so they could go on with what they once had. They would never know it’s fake. They would be happy; they would grow old after living a long fulfilling life and it would feel just as real as anything else.  
   
Jared would have none of it though. He quoted a bunch of movies, none of which Jensen knew anything about. _Inception. Matrix. Repo Men._ Apparently they all touched on the subject of virtual reality and Jared thought it was “fucked up” in the movies and even more “fucked up” that it was truly happening to all of humanity.  
   
He also wanted to know why humans couldn’t wake up once connected to the VSR, and Jensen debated with himself for a while before agreeing to explain.  
   
It all comes from the brain. Life starts and ends right there.  
   
It’s all _in_ the brain. Humans might think they feel something in the tip of their fingers or the base of their feet, but they can only feel it because the brain can process it. Emotions, feelings, even pain comes from the brain. It controls everything humans know and perceive around them. They function thanks to the brain, they feel thanks to the brain, they can interact with the world around them thanks to the brain. That’s why an accident where humans get bad head injuries can leave them without the ability to walk or completely erase their memories.  
   
It’s because it’s all there. The big boss of everyone’s being.  
   
Shifters know enough about technology and science to understand how every little part of the human brain works and that’s what allowed them to construct the VSR. And for each human to be able to function, feel and interact inside the virtual worlds in their own heads, they need the connection from the VSR to their brain to be direct. Healers who work at the Facilities are in charge of that process. And once the connection is made, there’s no going back. The VSR needs to reach every part of it to make the virtual reality perfectly believable. Separating the VSR from a human would cause all these connections to break, completely damaging the brain and causing immediate death. There’s no way to disconnect a human from the VSR once the process starts. The human will never wake up; they can’t be brought back to reality.  
   
Shifters knew that detail when they designed the VSR central brain, but it was fine for them, because keeping the dangerous murderous humans alive in a happy environment where they would never cause any trouble was ideal. The perfect merciful solution to deal with the only species in the Universe that destroyed everything they touched.  
   
The Facilities were considered a place of compassion and forgiveness among shifters. A place where all humans were forgiven for the bad they had done and could have a second chance to live their lives without causing more trouble.  
   
Jared had stormed into his room and not talked to Jensen for two days straight after he finished his explanation, so, clearly, he disagreed.  
   
Jensen had tried and tried and _tried_ to make Jared open the door and let him explain, but Jared thought everything about the Facilities, the VSR and the Collectors was the definition of a living nightmare.  
   
Not even Jensen’s hopeful addition that shifters cured the illnesses of all humans who ended in the Facilities to make sure they lived as long as possible in their happy virtual realities. A person who would not live past twenty seven because of cancer would be cured by the healers working there and get to live many years more, always being taken care of, keeping their bodies healthy and alive thanks to their technology.  
   
It didn’t make Jared feel better. Jensen had to let him cool off on his own, feeling really bad about it. He had never had someone pissed off at him before, not like this. Jensen had no idea how to deal with Jared being specifically angry at him, even if Jensen wasn’t the one who invented the VSR or decided that was humanity’s future, so he gave him his space until Jared wanted to talk again.  
   
After only one day of Jared sitting to eat with Jensen while absolutely ignoring him, not answering his questions and going back into his room along with a stack of Jensen’s books—even if they were classified as “boring”—Jensen found himself using the laptop with almost ten tabs open, reading different versions of “how to make someone stop being mad at you” and “things to do when you put a friend in a bad mood.”  
   
The internet had become something really controlled and supervised once shifters took over. Jensen had read that there use to be tons of, as Jared would say, “fucked up” internet pages and content when humans ruled the Earth. When Jensen had to tried to ask Jared about it he said it was better not to go down that hell hole; it would only give Jensen a worst perspective of humanity in general. Jared said “it could be fun but some idiots would use it for horrible stuff too.”  
   
Now shifters had used their own technology to alter and fix the already used internet to basically turn it into a big digital book. It was mostly for basic information, educational videos, calming music, all those movies and TV shows that Jared found so boring, news and nice pictures. Most of the human content had been deleted and there were few pages and entries from shifters across the earth to meet, talk and discuss.  
   
So, of course, there was no way for Jensen to find anything about “how to make a human happy.” All he found was pages of medical information on what to do if a shifter started to experience negative human emotions like “violent anger”. How it felt, how to deal with it until you reached the nearest hospital and the numbers you should call to get help.  
   
Jensen read somewhere in a book that giving flowers always helped. He cut some of them from the garden around the house and put them on the table when they were going to eat lunch, but all Jared did was eye them and Jensen suspiciously before taking his plate and going to eat in front of the TV.  
   
Was Jensen supposed to add them to the food? Present them in a specific way? Kneel and show them, waiting for Jared to accept the peace offering? God, humans were so complicated.  
   
Next Jensen tried to leave flowers randomly around the house. The kitchen, the couch, the bathroom. Maybe he hadn’t placed them in the right place? But all Jared did was pick them up and add them to the vase of water on the table along with the previously cut flowers, giving Jensen a confused look before going back to his room.  
   
So, no flowers then? Not the right kind? Color? How did humans deal with this all the time?!  
   
Jensen sighs, picking the clothes he’s going to wear the next day for work. His free time is over after Danneel forced him to take a vacation for at least two weeks, convinced that Jensen had gotten so sick because he did nothing but work and not take time to himself. Jensen’s boss at the hospital agreed, saying that Jensen would even go on weekends and spend nights there if needed. They all liked his presence and appreciated all his help but wanted Jensen to recover properly. That’s what allowed Jensen to stay with Jared all this time, but now he needs to go back.  
   
He really doesn’t want to leave with Jared mad at him. He had been checking for human books online earlier and he found something about chocolates in heart shapes, maybe he should try that? Jared seemed to like sweets, although Jensen doesn’t know how he is going to make the chocolate take a human heart shape. The ventricles are going to be especially hard to carve.  
   
“Uh—hey?” Jensen hears from behind him, causing him to turn around immediately, finding Jared poking his head inside the room. “Can I come in?”  
   
“Sure!” Jensen says immediately, making a silly motion to the inside of the room with one hand. He can feel his heart rate accelerate and sweat on his hands. Maybe he’s getting sick for real. “Yeah. Are you—are you alright? Are you still mad at me?”  
   
Jared sighs and walks in the room, hands behind him and a curious expression on his face. Jensen doesn’t realize Jared is examining his room at first. That’s right. Jared has never been in there before. This one is the master bathroom, or so Danneel said when Jensen moved in, so it’s bigger than Jared’s room and has a bigger bed too. There’s a bathroom to the side, a TV in front of the bed and shelves filled with mostly books.  
   
“I’m not mad at _you_. I’m mad at all shifters, which happens to include you.”  
   
“Alright?” Jensen frowns, not following Jared’s logic. But so far he hasn’t been that successful with dealing with any of Jared’s post-offense logic, so maybe Jensen is not one to argue with this.  
   
“Yeah.” Jared looks down, nibbling on his lower lip. “You do know it’s unfair to make humans believe they are living their usual lives when they aren’t, don’t you? And it’s horrible that shifters act like it’s such a good, compassionate thing!”  
   
Jensen doesn’t know how to answer. He doesn’t want to say the wrong thing and end up angering Jared again. And Jensen could sit here and explain and explain all the good things about Facilities but he truly doesn’t want Jared not speaking to him for another two days. He has missed the sound of Jared’s voice.  
   
“And I know you didn’t design them or anything, but you’re not against them either.” Jared shoots him a frown and Jensen opens and closes his mouth, still not sure what to say to defend himself without making Jared angry. “And maybe you’re just as horrible as the rest of them if you think Facilities are a perfect place.”  
   
“I’m not horrible like them.”  
   
_Honestly_. Of all the things Jensen could say, that’s what he chooses? _I’m not horrible like them._ What’s that even supposed to mean? That he doesn’t think like the rest of them? That he doesn’t agree with the use of Facilities? Jensen doesn’t even know himself; he has been thinking so hard about it for the past days that his head is a mess and he doesn’t have an impartial opinion on them anymore. Sure, they have good things and are a safe way to keep humans contained and happy, but how would Jensen feel if everything he’s experiencing right now was a lie? Would life lose all meaning? Well, he has no clue.  
   
All he knows is that he doesn’t want Jared to consider _him_ “horrible”.  
   
“Well, so far you haven’t reacted like any of them. You helped me and haven’t ratted me out.” Jared nods along, not making a comment on Jensen’s rather stupid answer. “But maybe think about what I’m saying about Facilities from a more human perspective, alright? I know is hard because you see it all with your shifter views but just—try, okay?”  
   
“If I try, will you speak to me again?”  
   
Yeah, he’s not even controlling what he says anymore. All he wants is Jared to stop ignoring him. It’s bothering Jensen more than anything has in his long, vast life.  
   
Jared’s lips curve only for a second but he tries to hold on to  his frown.  
   
“Yeah. If you try I’ll speak to you again.”  
   
“Then I’ll do nothing but try to think about it from now on.”  
   
Jared gives him another look that Jensen can’t quite understand and then nods in return, finally smiling and making the tension in Jensen’s body drain away. He didn’t even notice he had been tense up until now.  
   
“By the way, you need to stop leaving these just anywhere. They’ll die if they aren’t in water.” Jared moves one of his hand from behind his back, showing the rose that Jensen left on the coffee table earlier that day. “I thought you shifters cared for all living things and so on, why are you leaving all those flowers out randomly? Is it some kind of ceremony for you guys?”  
   
For the first time in his life, Jensen feels utterly and completely stupid.  
   
It hasn’t happened before, that uncomfortable feeling in the middle of his chest while he feels his face start to heat up, desperately hoping to change the topic. Jensen can consider himself smart. He has traveled to different planets, learned from their cultures, was taught different dialects and learned what other species had to offer. And he’s a healer. He learned from one of the best shifters in their own history and Jensen has become quite good thanks to this. Shifters across the Universe recognize him by just hearing his name.  
   
And yet here he is, standing in front of a human and feeling like a complete—what was that word Jared taught him?  
   
_Moron_.  
   
Jensen’s a moron. He has been getting all those flowers to somehow make Jared stop being mad at him and he had done it so wrong Jared didn’t even understood that they were _for him_. Jensen is _never_ trying a human practice he doesn’t understand ever again.  
   
This is stupidly embarrassing and there’s no way he’s admitting that in front of Jared.  
   
“It’s—uh. It’s nothing. I read somewhere, they’re for—” Jensen stutters, waving one hand dismissively and shaking his head. Jared gives him a curious look so Jensen turns around, pretending to pick a shirt from his closet. “It doesn’t matter- I was doing it wrong anyway. I won’t cut them anymore.”  
   
“I like how they look in the vase on the table though. I don’t know if cutting flowers is against you guys’ beliefs about caring for nature but…” Jared trails off, which pricks Jensen’s interest and makes him turn to look at Jared over his shoulder. He’s looking at the flower with a little smile while using two fingers to stroke the petals. Jensen can’t bring himself to look away. “They are so beautiful. Can we keep some of them in the house?”  
   
The look Jared has in that moment, distracted staring at the flower while his eyes light up and a little smile appears on his lips, Jensen would do anything to keep him like that all the time. He can’t forget all the times he has seen Jared hurt, Jared crying, and Jared desperate for a way out. Jensen will fill up the house with flowers if Jared wants.  
   
“Yes, of course we can.”  
   
Jared smiles full force, dimples appearing on his face and making Jensen not care that much about how stupid he felt before.  
   
“By the way, why the fancy clothes?” Jared teases a second later, taking a look at Jensen’s suit over his bed. “Getting suited up to make breakfast tomorrow and read more of your boring medicine books? And you say humans are weird.”  
   
Jensen’s sudden good mood dies down when he remembers. That’s right. He hasn’t told Jared yet.  
   
“No. I actually have to go back to work tomorrow. The two weeks off my boss gave me are over.”  
   
Jared’s own smile goes away as soon as he hears him, jaw hanging open as his expression turns into that worried grimace Jensen hates seeing on him. For the first time in weeks, Jared seems like he feels out of place in there, looking from Jensen to the door of his room and then back to the clothes.  
   
“You’re—“ Jared whispers, leaving the flower on Jensen’s bedside table. “You’re leaving? You’re not going to be here tomorrow?”  
   
“Yes, I have to leave to work. But I’ll be back at nighttime.” Jensen adds, and for a moment he wonders if that’s an assurance for him or for Jared. “And there are enough things in the fridge for you to eat if you don’t want to cook.”  
   
Jared nods, distracted and too into his own thoughts. He’s not looking at Jensen anymore and Jensen wishes he could know what he’s thinking. Is Jared planning how to leave already? Has he been waiting to be alone to do it and not expecting Jensen to leave him alone so soon? Jensen bites his tongue to stop himself from saying anything though.  
   
“So I’m just going to be alone.”  
   
“I know it’s not the best plan, to be locked up in the house all the time. And I recommend you don’t get too close to the windows or change them from screening mode so my neighbors won’t see you.” He doesn’t want Jared to stay out of fear of being caught, but at the same time it is true that everything would go completely to hell if someone else saw Jared in there. “You can watch TV or read or do whatever you want in here. Your choice, anything that keeps you distracted.”  
   
There is another nod from Jared and he seems so uninterested in what Jensen is saying that something in Jensen’s head starts to repeat that Jared will leave tomorrow. Jensen will drive off to work in his electric car and Jared will leave soon after him.  
   
The sensation it creates in his chest makes Jensen want to erase that idea from his head. Permanently.  
   
“Sure thing. Thanks.” Jared mumbles, taking the flower from the bedside table again and raising his eyebrows. “Good luck at work tomorrow, Jensen.”  
   
And then he’s gone, closing the door behind him on his way out and not waiting for Jensen to say anything in return.  
   
_Jared’s leaving_. He’s been waiting for the opportunity to leave.  
   
Jensen sits down on the bed, heart bumping hard in his chest as he closes his eyes and presses his face into his hands. Humans might be dangerous, but not for the reasons shifters thought all along.  
   
 

 

—

 

 

 

   
For the past two weeks, Jensen had been convinced that all he needed was to go back to work.  
   
Surrounding himself with shifters like him would make everything stop spinning and put it all back in place. Jensen has been locked in with a human for days; it’s messing with his head to just be around him nonstop. Shifters consider socializing and making friends important and this is probably why. As a healer, Jensen is not used to just being with one creature all the time. He’s always visiting new planets, meeting new species and learning among them. It’s never been like this.  
   
He leaves early in the morning, when Jared is still asleep. Jensen leans into the doorframe and watches him for a couple minutes, enjoying the simplicity of watching Jared’s chest rise and fall as he breathes. Jensen remembers still doing this when Jared wasn’t awake at all, too weak to regain consciousness. How can humans be this fascinating?  
   
Jensen loves his job. But for the minutes he stays in Jared’s room, he wishes he wouldn’t have to leave.  
   
He takes a last look over his shoulder to glance at Jared, thinking it might be the last time he sees him.  
   
The Hospital is the same as the last time Jensen was there, the night he stayed locked in his car for a long time, reading that book. That had been the night Jared broke into his house. It feels like that was a millennia ago. To think Jensen was so excited to read a note a human left in a book and now he had a human living in his own house.  
   
But not for long.  
   
Everything is exactly the same, of course. The route to get there, the parking lot, even Alona is the same, waiting at the entry of the building and standing up to go meet Jensen at the door. They think Jensen was really sick; of course they are going to be worried. Alona puts her arms around Jensen’s neck and presses a kiss to his cheek. Jensen barely pats her on the back, movements clumsy. How can he still feel uncomfortable with human-like contact when he was the one who hugged Jared that night? Jensen reached out, he had pulled Jared close and felt immediate relief when Jared leaned in closer. It couldn’t be that different.  
   
“Oh, sorry!” Alona pulls away after a second, giving him a friendly smile. “I forgot you don’t like hugs that much, Healer Ackles.”  
   
It’s true. He doesn’t. Maybe that time was different, because Jared _really_ needed that hug.  
   
“It’s fine, Alona.” He nods back at her, trying to put on a friendly expression as his brain insists on reproducing the feeling of Jared pressing his face into his neck and crying against his neck. He has seen Jared cry so many times, the sound of his sobs forever imprinted in his mind. It breaks Jensen’s heart.  
   
“We all really missed you, and all your patients keep on asking about you.” She gives him another smile before going behind the counter once again, looking for something in it for a couple seconds before pulling out a paper bag. “They all have left get-well cards and gifts for you, but your accommodator told us to wait until you got back to give them to you.”  
   
Oh, Danneel. She was always a step ahead and had no idea how convenient that was. If a shifter dropped by unannounced at his house, Jared would have—lost his shit? Is that the expression he used once? He’ll have to ask Jared when he’s back home.  
   
_‘If he’s at home at all’ he_ thinks after picking up the bag and thanking Alona, heading towards his office.  
   
This is what shifters do, care for everyone. His patients, his co-workers, his accommodator; They all simply wanted Jensen to get better when it had been nothing but a lie. They took the moment to write cards for him, buy him candies and give them to Alona so she could later deliver them to Jensen. This is the kind of heart-warming thing that should make Jensen realize this is where he belongs and the right place to be, surrounded by his caring species who will always care for him, even if they barely know Jensen at all. This is supposed to be his home.  
   
And yet, all Jensen can do while he walks to his office is think about how excited Jared is going to be when he sees that bag full of candies. He’s going to want to eat all the chocolates, probably try to be polite and leave some of them to Jensen so he doesn’t feel like he’s stealing them, to eventually get ecstatic when Jensen assures Jared he can eat them all. Jensen doesn’t like sweets that much anyway.  
   
The day can’t pass any slower. It becomes a real test of Jensen’s patience.  
   
It feels like every consult takes three times longer than usual, and all he does during them is glance at the clock repeatedly. Helping shifters who are just getting used to their new bodies after arriving on earth is always one of favorite parts for Jensen, happy to see them be fascinated by everything the human body can do. But today, on the other hand, it’s proving to be harder than ever. He tries his best to remain friendly as he explains the basics to a new couple of shifters who came from Neptune: Matt and Mandy Cohen. They seem nice enough, both of them incredibly excited after reading tons of information about Earth and how this body is going to feel.  
   
“Do you like living here so far?” Mandy asks with an excited voice while Jensen checks Matt’s reflexes and checks the nerve endings on his hands. Some young shifters are so excited to change into a new body that they don’t finish the process properly. Jensen has to make sure they don’t leave the Hospital until checking their bodies are in perfect condition.  
   
“Yeah, Earth is a really nice planet.” Jensen nods distractedly, going to type something on his digital notepad.  
   
“We weren’t sure about coming here at first.” Matt comments from his seat.  
   
“How so?” Jensen hums, more out of politeness. He has another forty minutes in here with them and time might go by faster if they at least talk.  
   
“Because we heard not all humans were captured. Apparently small groups remain here and there.” Mandy speaks again, and this time her voice sounds agitated. “That’s horrible! Imagine running into one of them in the street and getting hurt. Collectors are so brave, risking themselves for us so all humans can be taken away to where they belong.”  
   
Jensen grips the notepad immediately, breath catching in his throat. _Where they belong_. Where does Jared belong? A Facility, a place that keeps on giving him nightmares and keeping him awake at night? Does he not belong, not even a little bit, safe in Jensen’s house? He seems happy enough there. He smiles and laughs and talks for hours with Jensen about the things they don't know or understand. On the other hand, he cries bitterly with the idea of being “taken away”.  
   
Not all humans were captured. Jensen doesn’t think that’s horrible at all.  
   
If they were, he would have never met Jared.  
   
Jared’s not bad. _They don’t get it_. He’s not what shifters think. _Jared’s different_. He doesn’t “belong” anywhere he doesn’t want to be.  
   
“Healer Ackles?”  
   
The sudden feeling of someone’s hand on his shoulder makes Jensen turn around, surprised to find Matt standing in front of him giving him a confused look.  
   
He’s been quiet ever since Mandy spoke about the Collectors taking away all humans. Matt looks down at his hands and frowns, making Jensen realize he’s gripping the notepad so hard that his knuckles are turning white and the touchscreen is pixelating. Jensen tries to act normal the rest of the consult, letting Mandy fill up the silences with her constant chatter, but something in him doesn’t let him appreciate the rest of their forty minutes together. He’s basically relieved to see them go get the shots they need, calling a nurse to help him out with that task.  
   
Jensen can’t believe how badly he wanted to get away from them. He’s not usually too social but he has never rejected any shifter’s company. But this is different. _Jensen didn’t like them_.  
   
That’s not how a shifter is supposed to behave. They don’t dislike anybody.  
   
Being back to work should be helping him, but instead, is only making it even worse.  
   
During lunch Jensen takes his food to eat alone in his car and considers calling the phone at his house to ask Jared how he’s doing, but he didn’t tell Jared he would call at a certain hour, and he might not pick up thinking someone else is calling.  
   
Or he might not pick up because he’s not home at all.  
   
Jensen closes his eyes and presses his forehead against the wheel.Maybe he should have stayed home after all.  
   
The rest of his day doesn’t help in the least. Jensen has one in-vitro procedure and it takes him twice the time it usually would, drifting away constantly, thinking about things he and Jared had talked about and all the details about the Universe that had interested Jared. He really liked to hear details about how other species in other galaxies looked, how their bodies and minds worked, how their usual life would be. Jensen could spend hours telling Jared stories, enjoying the way Jared would open his mouth or look extremely fascinated. Humans were the only ones who never had any contact with beings from other planets so everything was new and interesting for Jared.  
   
Jensen loves that he was the one who had the chance to explain him everything he didn’t understand.  
   
What was supposed to be a day to help him relate with shifters again turned out to only make Jensen think about Jared even more than before. Jared, Jared and Jared. Not like Jensen had an important job to think about. His mind was far away, too busy thinking about the human who could potentially not even be at his house anymore.  
   
By the time Jensen’s shift is over and he has to drive back home, he’s convinced that Jared won’t be there anymore. Why would he? Jensen knows Jared doesn’t belong inside of a Facility, but that doesn’t mean Jared thinks he belongs hidden in Jensen’s house. Jared would want to be surrounded by humans. He’s not like Jensen, who would rather go home to be with someone completely different than him than stay with his own kind.  
   
Jensen is fascinated with humans. He’s fascinated with Jared.  
   
But it’s clearly not mutual. Jared is afraid of things like Jensen, he said it himself.  
   
Parking in front of the house and seeing all the lights off makes something in Jensen’s chest sting. _He was right._ Jensen stays in his car for more than he should, hoping to see any movement or indication that there’s someone in there. He told Jared to leave the windows in screening mode to not raise any suspicion, but that option doesn’t give him any relief. He steps out of the car and looks at both sides of the street, wondering what direction Jared could have taken. How could Jensen ever know if Jared made it safely to the place he came from? What if he got sick like before and Jensen wasn’t there to make it all better? But even if it meant Jared had to starve himself and be at risk constantly, he would choose all that as long as he could be with other humans. Because anything was better than being with a thing that had caused him so much fear.  
   
The house is in complete silence when Jensen walks in, locking the door behind him. He has been doing that since Jared broke into the house, not to protect himself from more humans, but to keep shifters out. Not that any of them would come in without permission, but it was better to make sure. To keep Jared safe.  
   
The kitchen seems to be just like Jensen left it, no indication that anybody cooked in there. All the books are in the same place on the coffee table and when he calls Jared’s name, there no answer.  
   
Jensen closes one hand into a fist, the burning in his chest growing inexplicably. He knew this would happen all along. Jensen was only helping Jared until he felt better.  
   
He only wishes he could have had the time to at least say goodbye.  
   
The last inch of hope, Jared’s room, is completely empty when Jensen walks in. The bed is perfectly made and the lights are off. The screening mode of the windows are back to making them look like part of the wall, something Jared seemed to hate because it made him feel locked up. He had made sure to leave everything how he found it before leaving.  
   
Jensen leans into the doorframe and stares at the empty bed.  
   
The velveteen rabbit had been right to be worried when the boy got sick in the story, but not for the reason it thought. The kid had refused to sleep unless he had his stuffed animal with him, which made the velveteen rabbit happy once again, glad to be able to help his kid when he needed him; but as soon as the boy felt healthy again it was time to burn the old stuffed animal. The velveteen rabbit was now contaminated after spending so much with the kid while he was sick.  
   
The boy needed a new rabbit to keep from getting sick again. He needed what was better for him. The velveteen rabbit wanted to stay with the boy, but that wasn’t what the best for the boy.  
   
Jensen wasn’t the best for Jared.  
   
He gives one last, long look at the empty room before turning away.  
   
Things will go back to normal again. The only problem is that Jensen doesn’t want normal anymore.  
   
The door of his room opens once Jensen gets close, making him stop once he notices the only light inside of it coming from the TV. One of the old human movies Jensen had at home is currently playing, more than halfway done by that point, not a single sound coming from the TV since it seems to be muted. It’s the light coming from the TV that let’s Jensen see the fort of pillows and blankets on his bed along with the body curled on one side, completely asleep with the movie playing silently in the background.  
   
Jared is there. Sleeping on his bed and currently drooling on one of Jensen’s pillows.  
   
Jensen smiles instantly and walks closer to the bed by pure instinct, ache in his chest asking for him to close the gap between him and Jared after thinking he would never be able to see the human again.  
   
He sits by the end of the bed and watches Jared sleep, the feeling inside his chest completely changing to a placid, warm one when he sees Jared reach over and hug Jensen’s pillow.  
   
 


	9. Chapter 9

 

—Part Nine—  
(Jared)

 

  
  
  
He wakes up to the feeling of the sun on his face. It makes him sit up on the bed, startled, as he looks around. He shouldn’t feel any sun if he left the windows in screening mode. Did he forget? Jared looks around, only needing a couple of seconds to realize he’s not in his room. The windows are on the opposite side of where Jared is used them to be and there are shelves everywhere filled with books that his room doesn't have.  
  
It’s Jensen’s room.  
  
But if he slept here all night, then where—?  
  
“Jensen?” Jared calls out a heartbeat later, remembering that he fell asleep before Jensen got home. Did something happen? What if Jensen didn’t come back? “Jensen!” Jared is screaming this time, about to jump out of the bed. What if Jensen got caught for helping a human? Jared has never asked about  that before. He assumed that because shifters don't believe in any kind of violence that meant they wouldn’t do anything to Jensen. The punishment would be just for him, a human.  
  
But Jared could be wrong.  
  
The door opens before Jared can move out of the bed to do anything else and suddenly Jensen is there. He’s wearing the suit Jared saw on the bed the night before, but he doesn’t have his tie on and his shirt is untucked out of his pants. All accompanied with a clear case of bed-hair because of the spiky mess of Jensen's head.  
  
“Jared, what—” Jensen blinks, yawning while he rubs his eyes, seeming both confused and worried. “Are you alright? Did something happen?”  
  
Jensen looks around the room, trying to find something wrong with it. Jared lets out a sigh of relief, pressing a hand to his chest, feeling his heart beating fast.  
  
“No. No, I’m fine. I just—” Jared licks his lower lip, feeling his cheeks burn when he realizes why he had been screaming like that. He had just woken up and reacted before thinking rationally, before even going to check the rest of the house. Jared fell asleep in here so it makes sense for Jensen to find another room to spend the night. “I woke up in here and I didn't see you so I thought you didn’t—I’m sorry. That was stupid.”  
  
Jared hadn’t even planned to stay there all night, he just wanted to watch some tv and felt weird on the living room all alone, house silent except for the noises from the boring shows he could find. He had been tip-toeing around the house all day, feeling strange being all by himself. Without Jensen there to keep him company, Jared felt like he was exposed, waiting for someone to break into the house and take him away. He had been somehow okay in Jensen’s room though, some of the tension leaving his body when he sat on the bed, surrounded by things that reminded him of Jensen. Jared had decided to watch a movie in there since Jensen did say Jared could do anything he wanted, so wandering around Jensen's room had to count, too. Jared's idea was to organize everything and go back to his own room once the movie was over, but apparently, he fell asleep before he could hide the evidence.  
  
He swallows nervously, licking his lips before looking down, hiding his eyes behind his bangs.  “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to take over your room.”  
  
Jensen gives him a little smile, walking past the door and coming closer to sit on the bed. He really does look like he has just woken up, which makes Jared feel terribly guilty. He should have really considered the option of Jensen being somewhere else in the house before he started to yell like that.  
  
“It’s fine. But maybe I should get you a tv for your room?”  
  
“Oh! No, that’s not that why I—” Jared licks his lips again, glancing down. Sometimes it’s easy to talk to Jensen because he doesn’t think like a human would. Jared really likes the way Jensen sees the world, how he seems to have a different vision on everything because of what he is and because of what a lifetime of traveling through the universe has taught him. But at the same time, it can get really hard to speak to Jensen at certain times as well. Because a human maybe would get why Jared ran into Jensen’s room as soon as he started feeling lonely. “I didn’t come here for the TV. You were gone and I… well, I was scared.”  
  
Jensen frowns for a moment, leaning closer to him. “Scared? Did something happen?”  
  
“Yes.” Jared makes a pause. Again, a human would get it by this point. But Jensen is not human at all. “ _You left,_ that’s what happened.”  
  
“But I said was coming back at night as soon as my shift was over.” Jensen replies instantly, seemingly too worried about Jared’s apparent fear to even realize how embarrassing it is that Jared’s first reaction to feeling scared is going to curl up in Jensen’s bed. This is exactly why Jared was planning to leave the room before Jensen got home.  
  
“I know but I hadn’t been alone in here until yesterday and I kept imagining all these scenarios about shifters breaking in and taking me away. And I already told you I’m afraid of shifters.”  
  
“But I’m a shifter too.”  
  
Yes, indeed. Jensen is as much of a shifter as any of the ones Jared is terrified of. But at the same time, he’s somehow different from all of them. Shouldn’t Jensen have reported him by now? Jensen promised he wouldn’t call the _Collectors_ but he didn’t have to keep that promise. Jared is just another human, and  at the end of the day Jensen doesn't owe him anything. As a matter of fact, Jared is the one who owes Jensen for everything he has done to help.  
  
As Jared fails to think of a reasonable answer, a rather cocky smile starts to appear on Jensen’s face before he begins to laugh softly.  
  
Jared opens his mouth, both offended and amused. He takes one of the pillows behind him, throwing it at Jensen, who laughs harder when it hits him into one side of his face.  
  
“Fine, if you really want to know, I kind of think you’re not full of shit.” Jared crosses his arms over his chest, staring at Jensen, who snorts and mumbles “Thanks a lot _.”_ with a sarcastic tone. “Shut up, I’m not done. I think you’re… alright. But it doesn’t mean I like the rest of your kind. I don’t believe in all of them, I only trust _you_.”  
  
 Jensen stops laughing, but the smile is still there.  
  
“That’s good to know.”  
  
“Really?” Jared arches an eyebrow, expecting Jensen to come out to defend all the other shifters like he usually does. “You don’t mind I think the rest of your species is full of shit?”  
  
To his utter surprise, all Jensen does in response is shrug.  
  
“I think I’m never going to be able to convince you of the opposite, ” Crinkles appear around his eyes as the smile grows again. “Besides, I think that as long as you trust me, I can deal with the rest. That’s what really matters.”  
  
Jared is not sure what to make of that answer, but he can’t help smiling back at Jensen.  
  
  


 

—

 

  
  
  
After another two weeks have gone by and Jared starts to get used to Jensen leaving for work but coming back every night, he realizes something that leaves him thinking all day and keeps him awake at night: Jared’s feeling good as new. It shouldn’t be a problem, except for the fact that being healthy again means that it’s time for him to leave.  
  
It’s not exactly a surprise that he’s feeling better, it was bound to happen with Jensen giving him his advanced space medicine and weird injections along with healthy plates of food at least three times a day. Jared has done nothing but eat, sleep, drink all his medicine and basically relax in the house. Of course he would get better under those conditions.  
  
Jensen always seems to be worried about Jared being bored, but at this point of his life, the last thing Jared is worried about is being entertained. He’s alive and safe. That is pretty much all that matters for any surviving human. Besides, being at Jensen’s place isn’t as bad as Jensen makes it sound. Yes, Jared is alone when Jensen has to work, but he tries to stay busy. He can search for movies and videos on Jensen’s laptop, not minding that all he’s going to find are happily boring stories. Jensen has been bringing him books from the library too, anything that doesn’t include medicine and can distract Jared somehow. He really enjoys the history books, especially the ones that are about shifter history. Jensen went to a store just to get him a recently published story about a shifter that had been living at what humans would refer to as the Pinwheel Galaxy. Shifters and all the other species out there seem to call it Synthi Prime Galaxy instead. Jensen had explained before that all the planets in this solar system have different names in his native l language too, but they use the human names while here on Earth, considering them some kind of translation.  
  
That’s another reason why staying bored around Jensen is almost impossible. He has so much knowledge and stories about what is out there, stuff Jared will never be able to see with his own eyes. It’s clear to him by now that humans knew basically nothing about the universe. The fact that there are living things in their very same solar system and humans never saw them no matter how much research they tried to do is a big proof of that statement. Jared can sit and hear Jensen talk about galaxies and planets for hours, fascinated with the mental images it provides him with, pushing the nightmares about _Collectors_ far away from his head and instead letting him dream about Cinnra, a planet with a purple sky and three different suns that change colors during daytime.  
  
When Jensen is around, Jared doesn’t need books, movies or anything of the likes. He’s focused on whatever Jensen has to say or discuss at all times they are together. Jensen's basically a walking sci-fi audiobook. Not to mention telling Jensen common things about life on Earth before shifters got there seems to entertain him as much as Jared feels when Jensen explains how shifters can travel through space and cross such ridiculous distances like it’s nothing.  
  
He’s really going to miss Jensen when he leaves, there’s no denying that by now. Jared has grown to really enjoy Jensen's company so far. It’s like nothing Jared has experienced before. He would go as far as to consider Jensen a friend.  
  
The question is: where will Jared end once he takes off? Assuming Chad and Sandy made it back to the old factory—and Jared still doesn’t allow himself to think different—the group would have noticed Jared was missing and his friends probably had to admit they went to Dallas. Jared can imagine the rest of the story. Adrianne and Chris would give Chad and Sandy tons of shit for doing something stupid that could put them all in danger, but all that anger would come from worry and sadness after losing someone who was part of their group. Then, Jeffrey Dean would say that the important part was that at least Chad and Sandy were okay, add something sentimental about losing Jared and how much he would be missed and then make everyone start to pack so they could leave.  
  
None of them would stay so close to Dallas after what happened.  
  
It’s been a month, they probably have a new place to hide by now. How is Jared ever going to find them? He could perhaps go to the factory, look around trying to find any notes or indications from Chad or Sandy in case they had the hope that Jared was still alive. But at the same time, they wouldn’t leave any maps or clues behind for Jared to find their new location, it would be too risky to in case a Collector found it.  
  
Which means Jared is going to be all alone from now on.  
  
How is he going to make it? He’s not stupid, Jared is aware he survived so long thanks to Chad and then JDM. Jared wouldn’t last a day out there on his own, being afraid of the Collectors as much as he is of guns.  
  
But what other options does he have besides trying to survive on his own? Stay? Jensen might have been nice enough to help him get healthy and not alert the Security Division—Jared knows that after Jensen explained how shifter jobs are divided by Divisions; Jensen himself is part of the Health Division since he's a healer—but that doesn’t mean he’s going to let Jared stay there for ever.  
  
Jared doesn’t want Jensen to think that the more he gives him, the more Jared wants to take.  
  
He won’t take advantage all Jensen has been doing for him. Jensen has done more than enough.  
  
Not to mention that Jensen hiding a human could be a huge deal among shifters. Jared has been thinking that since the morning he woke up in Jensen’s bed and thought Jensen didn't come back from work. Jared doesn’t want to bring Jensen any troubles after all he has one for him.  
  
Jensen has been amazing to him this far, but he might not want Jared to stay. It’s pretty obvious. You help the dying human but you don’t keep him in your house for ever. And Jensen himself said he thought all humans were capable of horrible things; he wouldn’t want to have a violent pariah like a human as his permanent roommate.  
  
Jared understands he has to leave. If not for him, then to not bring Jensen any troubles.  
  
That night Jensen gets a little earlier than usual, and to Jared’s delight, Jensen comes bearing gifts for him.  
  
Jared is the middle of a really interesting chapter of the book Jensen got for him, the one about a female shifter living in all of the “top ten planets” of the _Synthi Prime Galaxy_ "and why you should consider a trip there" when he hears the door open and then Jensen's voice announcing he's back. Jared puts his new bookmark of a photograph of the _Aurora Borealis_ —a gift from Jensen—on the page he just finished reading and springs out of bed, carrying the book with him and shouting _“Let’s make grilled sandwiches for dinner!”_ before he makes it to the living room.  
  
“I was thinking of something a little different.” Jensen comments, taking off his jacket and leaving it on the couch. Jared raises both eyebrows, open to suggestions, and then Jensen raises a white paper bag with orange stripes as his wordless answer.  
  
 _“Whataburger!”_ Jared cries out, giving two excited jumps before running to take the bag. Jensen laughs in return like there’s nothing more exciting than seeing a human feeling happy over junk food.  
  
It smells exactly how Jared remembered, which makes Jared’s stomach growl embarrassingly loud—which gets him another little laugh from Jensen—before he takes the first bite and lets out a moan with his mouth full of food. Jared's so stupid happy about being able to eat something so familiar as a burger that he could cry. He had talked to Jensen about his favorite place to go eat with his best friend and how much he missed those burgers. He hadn’t mentioned the afternoons him and Chad spend day dreaming at the factory, thinking of eating Whataburger fries or choking burger after burger until they threw up. Jared skipped that part, the memories now almost painful to remember, but Jensen probably got the point of how bad Jared dreamt about eating something from his favorite restaurant once again.  
  
“I asked Alona to find one for me and she passed me a route from the Hospital to the nearest restaurant.” Jensen explains, eating his burger much more calmly than Jared. It doesn’t matter to Jared now, Jensen saw him eat like a pig after starving for weeks. Nothing can be worse than that.  
  
“I can’t believe you remembered!” Jared mumbles with his mouth full as he licks his lips and takes another bite. He groans happily one more time and Jensen grins, dipping his fries in ketchup. “Jensen, you’re the _best_.”  
  
“Let it be noted that a human thinks a shifter is the best.”  
  
“Only you man, only you.” Jared nods, too delighted to even try to outsmart Jensen with a cocky reply. “This is so fucking good. Isn’t it the best burger in the entire Universe?”  
  
“I suppose, considering it’s the only one I ever had.” Jensen takes another bite, nodding along while he shrugs.  
  
Jared rolls his eyes and gives him the finger, which makes Jensen snort and then he starts to cough after almost choking on his fries. Jared mumbles a _“serves you right for not respecting this food”_ while he keeps on eating happily.  
  
“It’s pretty tasty.” Jensen admits after he can breathe properly again and Jared lifts his chin proudly like it’s a compliment directed at him.  
  
“Right? It tastes almost the same as before.”  
  
“What do you mean?”  
  
“Well, this is not real meat.” Jared points at the burger in his hand, shrugging. “But I gotta say you shifters did a really good job imitating the taste. What is it?”  
  
Jensen gives him a rather proud smile, nodding as he keeps on eating his fries.  
  
 “I’m surprised you noticed.”  
  
“Dude, I’m from Texas.” Jared points out with an obvious tone, to which Jensen makes his usual _“I don’t know what that means”_ face, but Jared is too curious about the fake-meat discussion to jump into an explanation. “I know my meat, okay? Let’s leave it there. I assumed since all the chats we have about shifters caring for all living creatures that you guys wouldn’t actually kill animals for consuming.”  
  
“Well, seems like you’re catching up on how we work pretty fast.” Jensen gives the fried onions a weird look before picking one and taking a small bite. He makes a displeased face and leaves it back on the plate. Jared laughs. More for him then. “It’s a mixture of different things. Proteins and vitamins along with different flavors to make it taste just like human meat did.”  
  
“And let me guess, all the chemical substances to make the flavor are also good for your body too.” Jared adds, trying to imitate Jensen's matter-of-fact voice.  
  
“Exactly. All the chicken, meat and so on that you had so far when I cook is an imitation of what you humans had before.”  
  
“I figured.” Jared takes the onion ring Jensen just rejected and gives it a bite. Just as delicious as he remembered. “Hey, I’m not complaining. That's pretty cool that you can have meat without killing animals. I wasn’t a vegetarian back in the day because, fuck, meat is so good. But this is nice.”  
  
Is good to know that even if shifters are dicks to humans, they are pretty good at taking care of animals on Earth. They ruined sports, movies and made so many things incredibly dull, but at least this is good. They actually improved something without taking out the good parts. Jared’s impressed.  
  
“I’m glad you approve. I was hoping you could still enjoy your favorite food.”  
  
Jared nods before filling his mouth with another bite a little too big. He’s eating like an animal and he knows it but, who cares? Jensen doesn’t seem to mind. Actually, he keeps on watching Jared eat like is the best thing ever, smiling fondly when Jared looks up at him and their eyes meet.  
  
That has happened plenty of times since they met, Jensen looking at Jared like he’s the most interesting thing he has ever seen and so far.  But tonight, for the first time, Jensen’s glance makes Jared blush.  
  
Is not out of embarrassment or frustration like the time Jared couldn’t explain why he went to sleep on Jensen’s bed. This is different and Jared knows it. Because this is _that_ kind of blush.  
  
All this time Jared has been all over the place, first thinking Jensen had him hostage and then living in constant fear of being taken away by the Collectors. Just now he’s starting to get used to Jensen being around without any of those worries making his head constantly remind him to not trust him.  
  
But now Jared does. He thinks Jensen is different, he believes in him.  
  
Which is making Jared finally start to really see him. Jensen looks like a human. Sure, they all do, but for what Jensen explained, this is what he would look like if he was born a human instead of a shifter. This is _Jensen’s human_ body, _his_ human face. Now Jared gets it.  
  
And now Jared can stop and pay attention whenever Jensen looks intently at him.  
  
The shifter might not be aware of it, but he has one of the most attractive faces Jared has seen. Counting pre and post-alien conquering. And that's saying a lot, because Jeffrey Dean was pretty good looking himself. Jensen, on the other hand, is incredibly good looking.  
  
God, who is he kidding? If Jared had met him as a normal human when Earth was still theirs, the first thing Jared would have done after meeting him would have been calling Chad to tell him all about the “ _really hot doctor”_ he saw on the bus or met at the Hospital after getting pneumonia.  
  
Jared has been feeling pretty weird about it the past days, considering an alien “hot”. That only happens in certain erotic Japanese comic-books or weird porn. And there are usually tentacles involved and it can get really weird really fast. But, at the same time, this is different. Jensen doesn’t have a weird body or green sticky skin. He _looks_ like a human. He _is_ a human. Physically, at least.  
  
And, here’s the other thing: Jensen is a guy. He’s a male shifter with a male human body and Jared—well, Jared is gay.  
  
That doesn’t change, not even after the human race is erased from the Earth. He was gay before—and really deep in the closet except for Chad (and eventually Sandy), along with a couple people who knew back in High School—and he’s gay now. One hundred percent playing for dicks team, as Chad liked to say.  
  
And here’s Jensen. One hundred percent good looking shifter with a human body.  
  
Confusing as hell, sure, but still making that something inside Jared flush when Jensen smiles that way at him. He’s the kind of guy Jared would have been into back in the day. The kind of guy Jared is into.  
  
Like he said. _Weird_. Jared’s still trying to come to terms with how he feels about the whole thing.  
  
Furthermore, Jared has absolutely no clue how sexuality works with shifters. Jensen has never mentioned it and Jared never had the courage to ask so far. Besides, it doesn’t even matter. Jensen might be nice enough to help him and become his friend, but Jared is still a human.  
  
Jensen would _never_...not with him. Jesus, is stupid just to think about it.  
  
For Jared, Jensen might look the same as he is. But for Jensen, Jared is completely different.  
  
“Thank you for this, Jensen.”  
  
He didn’t have to bring him Whataburger. Jared had no idea the restaurants were still open and functioning when he told Jensen about it was just to make conversation. Jared didn’t expect him to go and actually try to get him his favorite food. Jensen being so nice really doesn’t help with his confusion at all.  
  
“My pleasure.” Jensen smiles, crinkles appearing around his eyes again. “You keep on getting healthy, which is so great, Jared. I thought you could use your favorite food to celebrate.”  
  
Healthy. Celebrate.  
  
Jared swallows and tries to smile back as he takes another onion ring. Maybe Jensen considered this to be a “goodbye” dinner? Jared is good as new so a nice way to end their improbable friendship is to offer him his favorite food as a farewell gift.  
  
Which, once again, shows how nice Jensen is. God, Jared is really going to miss Jensen. A lot.  
  
But now it’s getting clearer that Jensen probably wants Jared to go. There’s no way Jared can take advantage of Jensen’s niceness and ask him if he can stay. Jared will have to figure it out, try to find Chad and the group again or get caught trying. The odds are not in his favor and it seems like the last option will be the one going down, he’ll probably never find them, and it’s impossible to guess where they went. Jared is going to be hunted down. There’s nowhere for him to go.  
  
But Jared can’t bring Jensen down with him. Jared can’t get him in trouble.  
  
They finish their dinner with more small talk and Jared devours everything Jensen says he’s too full to eat, yet he suspects Jensen is just doing it so Jared can keep on eating and enjoying his favorite food. Jared helps pick up the dishes, wash them and then organize the kitchen. He has been insisting that he’s feeling better and can help around the house, yet Jensen tried to argue against it. Jared doesn't mind, it keeps him busy when Jensen is working.  
  
They walk down the hall and Jared goes to his room first, waving at Jensen goodnight and thanking him for the meal one last time. But before the door can completely close behind him, Jensen stops it and pushes it open again, leaning against the frame.  
  
“I was thinking all night and I—I wasn’t going to say anything, but I have to.” Jensen says with a serious voice, setting his jaw. “I get that you want to leave, I get it, Jared. I understand wanting to be with humans and go back now that you’re okay but…” He trails off, looking down and making Jared stop breathing until he speaks again. “I’m worried about you. I’m worried about you being taken to the Facilities, worried about you getting sick again.”  
  
It’s strange. The feeling that tingles all the way from Jared’s chest, down his arms and then reaching every part of his body. Nobody can’t deny it feels nice when someone cares about you. But somehow, Jensen caring for him is different. It’s nicer.  
  
He doesn’t have to care for a human; he doesn’t have to care for Jared.  
  
“I know is not the best option.” Jensen laughs nervously, shaking his head. “I know is not the best or the most convenient, but it’s safe. You can be safe here, I can keep you safe. You have a house, and a bed and all the food you want. I’ll bring you books and try to find you movies or games and—we’ll figure something out.” He seems a bit desperate, which is not that usual. Jensen is always calm and put together, however, it’s obvious to Jared how hard he’s trying to convince him to stay. “I know being locked in a house is not the ideal life but we can think of something so you won’t feel trapped in here. We can make it work, _I can—”_ Jensen sighs, biting his lower lip and shutting up once he realizes he has spoken nonstop for a whole minute. “You can stay, if you want, Jared.”  
  
And then, there’s silence. It’s usual for them now, after so much talking there are always moments when they both need to shut up and think of what they are learning from the other. Yet this is a difference kind of silence because there’s so much being said simply by the way they stare at each other.  
  
Jared almost wants to ask if Jensen wants him to stay. It’s pretty obvious after all Jensen said, but Jared wants to hear it from Jensen’s mouth. He wants the “I want you to stay”, which is ridiculous. Why is Jared being so weird about Jensen lately?  
  
“I’m going to miss you, Jared.”  
  
It's the last thing Jensen says before turning around to leave the room, finally letting the door close once he’s gone. Jared opens his mouth for a second, thinking about saying something, but nothing comes out. He doesn’t know what to say.  
  
Jared could leave right now. Tonight could easily be considered the goodbye dinner Jared thought it was and this their very last conversation. It’s nighttime, the best moment of the day to sneak around. He could take provisions with him, Jensen wouldn’t mind considering he can get food for free and he knows Jared had malnutrition before so he would understand Jared needs it out there. If Jared takes off now, he could make it to the factory by the early morning of the next day and figure things out from there.  
  
Everyone could be gone, sure, even Chad and Sandy. But maybe Jared could use the factory for himself, live there for as long as possible. All alone, hiding from what scares Jared the most for the rest of his life.  
  
Or he could stay here. With Jensen.  
  
It means giving up on ever finding Chad and Sandy or living with a human ever again, that’s true, and the thought alone makes Jared’s eyes fill with years instantly. He’s never going to see his best friend again.  
  
But Chad would want him to stay safe, and so would Sandy.  
  
And so would Jared’s mom.  
  
Going out there is risky, even more when Jared has no idea how to survive or defend himself on his own.  
  
Here, he has a chance to survive. And of course, he can stay with Jensen. He won’t be alone, he won’t be scared.  
  
All this time he worried about bringing problems to Jensen, but if he’s offering—well, maybe it’s not a terrible idea. Jensen said they could figure it out. Together.  
  
Jared misses Chad and Sandy terribly, he thinks about them every day and also misses the new family he found at the old factory, he really does. And he probably always will, but this sounds like a good option. Jensen was wrong, it is the best option. He has no idea how much Jared has come to like being in the house around him, feeling protected just by hiding in there with Jensen keeping him company.  
  
If Jared is honest with himself, Jensen has done more than grown on him. Jared likes Jensen, on which degree and what it means is a little too confusing to consider, but he knows that much. Jared likes him.  
  
So staying can’t be that bad.  
  
 _Yeah_. Jensen is not that bad.

 

 


	10. Chapter 10

  
  
—Part Ten—  
(Jensen)

 

  
  
  
  
They never really have the talk. The _“I’m staying”_ talk after the night they share Jared’s favorite food together and Jared looks so happy about it that Jensen can’t stop thinking about his smile for days.  
  
Jared’s doesn’t say anything. He just… _stays_.  
  
Which is exactly what Jensen wanted all along.  
  
Jensen kept on thinking as days went by—and Jared kept getting better—about the idea of living all alone. Watching Jared go would be too much to handle. Jared lives with him now, here, on Earth. They share rooms. Jensen keeps a human hidden in his place, this is his life now and Jensen doesn’t want to change that. He has the chance to help Jared and he’s going to.  
  
It's funny to think that Danneel wanted Jensen to make more friends and be more social.  
  
And then Jensen went and did exactly that. With a human. If he could only tell that one to Danneel. Jensen is sure it would be his best joke on Earth by far.  
  
Jared’s attitude is all the indication Jensen needs as prove that he won’t go anywhere, and even though Jensen would really appreciate a verbal confirmation, he’ll take what he can get. He has learned that going on at slow pace and giving Jared his time always brings back good results.  
  
Jared starts asking Jensen to bring him things for his room, small stuff here and there to decorate. Jared wanted to know if it was still possible to buy things online, which apparently it is and Jensen didn't know until then, so he gives Jared his laptop and lets him go wild ordering things to decorate his room. Jared gets new shelves they have to put up together, a couple plants Jared insist he wants to take care of. He also fills his room with photos and drawings of the planets and galaxies Jensen has talked about, hanging them close to his bed.  
  
Jensen has been thinking of getting Jared a new computer and see if they can find some video game that Jared won't find absolutely boring like he does with shifter movies and series. Jared keeps on insisting that video games with a little bit of drama or terror were the best ones, but as much as he tries to explain Jensen why, he never seems to get it.  
  
Jared helps to clean around the house, takes care of the plants they now have in the rooms and living room—considering he can’t do any gardening on the plants around the house—and is also starting to watch videos on the computer to learn to cook different meals. He makes a list of the ingredients he’ll use the next time he’s going to cook and Jensen makes sure to get them all at the store. The cashiers who work at the store close to Jensen’s house—and are there to scan the products to keep inventory and help costumers pack their groceries—are convinced that he’s taking cooking classes.  
  
Jensen, on his part, starts getting used to his job again. He’s back on track working with his patients and chatting with his coworkers whenever is necessary. He doesn’t have lunch with all the other healers as before though. Sometimes he looks for excuses to go to his office so he can call Jared in peace, who knows the number of Jensen’s office by now and recognizes it whenever Jensen calls.  
  
Jared usually answers on speaker phone, always doing something different. Sometimes he’s vacuuming, sometimes he’s changing or adding something new to his room, other times he's cooking or watching TV. He usually asks about Jensen’s day and makes him talk about all the specifics of the procedures with his patients.  
  
And somedays Jared makes little requests for Jensen. What he wants for dinner that night, maybe asking Jensen if he can go rent a movie or go get him something new to add to his room.  
  
Jensen has to admit, he’s getting pretty bad at saying “no” to Jared. It’s almost impossible when he knows the smile Jensen will get in return if he makes Jared happy.  
  
There’s nothing like the satisfaction of making Jared feel a little bit more at home.  
  
That’s probably what pushes him to do it. He has been going to the library just as much as before, but now to get Jared books instead of medicine literature for himself. Mrs. Ferris is just as helpful as always, not suspecting a thing form Jensen’s sudden change of taste in books, going from anatomy to space history.  
  
“Jensen!” She waves at him from the counter as soon as Jensen walks in, closing the door behind him and leaving his umbrella at the entry. It started pouring down when he was on his way there, but lucky Jensen has been carrying a big coat with him all day. Funny enough, the coat was not taken in case of a storm, but because Jensen had planned to come to the library since he woke up that morning.  
  
“Hi, Mrs. Ferris. Busy day?” Jensen takes a glance around, finding different tables full of shifters concentrated in their reading.  
  
“Yes, darling. Whenever it rains, everyone wants to come in here to spend the time.” She gives him a nice smile, patting his hand. “Did you just leave the Hospital? You healers work so hard for the community.”  
  
_Samantha Ferris likes him_. Jensen is no good when it comes to understanding human things like how to behave when one of them is mad at you or how to interpret their irony in some of their comments. He still doesn’t know if he’s interpreting Jared correctly half the time and he always has to ask to make sure. Jensen is an expert on human bodies, but that’s _it_. Beyond that, he doesn’t know a thing.  
  
But this? Shifters? Oh, _shifters_ Jensen gets.  
  
He has lived among them in different planets for more years than he cares to count. He has seen shifters meet their life partners, has seen others get kindly rejected and has also attended different types of marriages all across the Universe.  
  
So he knows. Jensen is aware that Mrs. Ferris seems to have a sweet spot for him. And while he’s not interested to know if it’s because he might remind her of someone special—like a son—or because she has some kind of crush on him, it would be silly to take that attraction for granted.  
  
And that’s bad. That’s really bad. Jensen shouldn’t somehow use that _something_ Mrs. Ferris feels for him and use it for any kind of advantage. That’s human behavior, shifters don’t do that. Usually, Jensen would never do this.  
  
But. _Jared_.  
  
“You still haven’t found the book I returned the other week?” Jensen leans into the counter, letting out a worried sigh. Jared said learning to lie when Jensen is hiding a human is key for it to work out, and while Jensen is not completely comfortable with the idea of constantly lying and Jared isn’t the master of lies either, he has been giving Jensen some pointers on how to make a lie believable. “I can’t believe I just came and left it back on the shelf when I know I have to let you register it again. I feel so bad, I’m so sorry.”  
  
“Oh, Jensen, please.” Samantha bats one hand in the air, smiling. “Honey, it's fine. I’m sure it’s somewhere in here. Sometimes when the books look like they are falling apart because they are really old we take them down to fix them up, leave them good as new. I’m sure it’s there. And we have another three copies of that one book, so you’re fine.”  
  
It’s the history book. The one he had been reading in the parking lot the night Jared crashed in his house. Weirdly enough, Jensen felt something about that book and Jared. It had human handwriting on it and Jensen found it at the same time Jared found his house. Giving the book back could make it end in the banned pile. It's stupid, but it made him think of Jared. As if making the book end in the banned section was like giving Jared away to the Collectors.  
  
There was nothing wrong with the book, only a couple phrases written in ink. Just like there was nothing wrong with Jared.  
  
They could both stay with Jensen.  
  
That’s why Jensen is sure Mrs. Ferris is not going to find the book now or ever. It’s currently in one of the shelves in Jensen’s room and it won’t be coming back to the library anytime soon.  
  
“I feel terrible, I really do. It’s like I lost it after you let me take it home.” _A white lie_ , thinks Jensen. A white lie that won’t hurt anyone. It’s just a book. “Is there anything I can do? Maybe if you let me try to find it?”  
  
Samantha clicks her tongue, shaking her head and giving him another smile. _How nice_ , she must be thinking. _What a good guy,_ is the opinion Samantha must have of him. Jensen wonders if Mrs. Ferris would like him at all if she knew Jensen has a human back home.  
  
That he’s currently lying to her just for that human.  
  
“Or maybe you can let me bring you another book in exchange? I have some favorites back at home, I’m sure one of them would do good in here—”  
  
“Oh no, honey, please keep your books.”  
  
Someone who also works in the library calls for her in that moment, waving a hand in the air. Jensen has seen the guy in there a couple times but doesn’t really know his name.  
  
“Oh, we are just starting a book club and is time for the discussion.” Samantha looks down at the watch on her wrists before glancing back at Jensen, who tries to put on his best guilty face. He’s sure that if Jared was there he would be laughing his ass off. “Oh, alright. Do you really feel that guilty? I swear it's fine.”  
  
“I lost it.” Jensen nods. “I feel terrible.”  
  
“You healers are too good. I keep telling that to everybody.” She sighs, starting to look for something in the drawers behind the counter. She opens and closes two of them before bending over to take what she's looking for. It’s an ID card with her name and a picture. Pretty much the same one Jensen carries around in the Hospital. Jensen's own ID card opens different doors like his office and the cabinet where they keep medicine and surgery supplements. The one Mrs. Ferris has must open all the doors in the library. “Even among us, healers are the core of our society. You are always looking out for all of us. Such a giving job and such wonderful shifters.”  
  
Jensen smiles, feeling truly flattered.  
  
But the feeling doesn’t compare to how hard his heart is beating as he eyes the card-key Samantha is holding.  
  
“I love my job and I’m glad you think that way  of us. You flatter me, Samantha.”  
  
Mrs. Ferris blushes at his answer, so perhaps she doesn’t think of him as a son. Jensen knows shifters really admire healers, his grandfather was a living prove of that. Jensen remembers being just a kid and seeing the admiration in everyone’s eyes whenever his grandfather walked into any room.  
  
Shifters usually feel more attracted to healers because they have a caring and giving job. The purest the shifter, the more attractive they are to others. She must think that way of Jensen too.  
  
Samantha Ferris has no idea.  
  
The guy from before calls her name again and she nods repeatedly, pressing her card to Jensen’s hand and giving it a little squeeze.  
  
“Go down the stairs behind the counter, honey. Try to look for the book in the first room on the right, that’s where we keep the ones that need fixing. You’re truly a gentleman, Jensen.”  
  
He waits until she’s out of sight, watching her walk towards the other shifter who gives Jensen a friendly smile. Jensen nods in rerturn, not moving an inch until they have both disappeared after a big bookshelf.  
  
The basement of the library is the exact example of how shifters would try to change something that had been constructed and previously owned by humans. The doors are automatic, opening as soon as they recognize the chip in Samantha’s card. The walls are made out of concrete and the stairs look really old, even if it seems like the have been painted in white recently. Shifters tried to make the basement look a little bit more cozy and new, but it still has that human vibe down there.  
  
Jensen likes it.  
  
He goes all the way down, checking the walls and the ceiling, looking for any cameras. It would be silly to have one of them at a library. This is owned by shifters. Jared said all kind of places used to have security cameras, mostly to make sure no client nor employee tried to steal something. Shifters don’t think that way. Nobody steals because it’s wrong. And of course, nobody needs to steal when you can get anything you want for free.  
  
But Jensen isn’t sure, maybe they kept some of those security cameras around, yet a quick look around the basement lets Jensen know it doesn’t seem like they did.  
  
The basement he descends into doesn’t seem as big as he expected, and the door Mrs. Ferris talked about is right by the end of the stairways along with a white sign that reads “book repair” in golden letters over the doorframe. There’s no way Jensen could get lost.  
  
But he doesn’t have any interest in checking that room.  
  
He throws a quick glance at the other three doors down there. Only one of them has a scanner like the one Jensen found at upstairs, so he guesses that’s the one he’s looking for. The other two are probably where Samantha and the other employees eat and enjoy their breaks. Maybe one of them could be Samantha’s office. It doesn’t matter. Jensen only cares for the one locked down.  
  
He can hear a voice call “ _bingo_ ” in his head when he gets to the end of the room and stops in front of the black door. It has a small plate next to the scanner that reads _“For authorized personal only.”_ They have one of those at the hospital too, next to the cabinets with strong medicines. The sign in the hospital is there only in case a shifter who's not a healer but finds the door will understand they are not supposed to take anything from there.  
  
Or, in this case, the sign is there so any lost shifter who ends in the library's basement won't go in.  
  
Too bad he’s not lost at all.  
  
Jensen passes the card in front of the scanner and for a long moment, nothing happens. That’s when it occurs to Jensen that maybe it won’t work, maybe not even Mrs. Ferris is authorized to go in there. What if there’s an alarm somewhere on the first floor as soon as someone tries to go in? How’s Jensen going to explain going inside a place he’s clearly not supposed to be in?  
  
The flickering red light of the scanner goes bright green just when Jensen is considering turning back and going into the repairing room where he’s supposed to be. Jensen hears a clicking noise behind the door and it slides open right before his eyes a second later.  
  
He drops the card to the floor once he can see the inside of the room.  
  
Now he understands why the basement looks so small at first when you go downstairs. All the missing space is here. Shifters probably added the walls that separate this room from the rest.  
  
The huge basement you would expect from such a big library is right there, locked behind an automatic door that only authorized shifters can pass.  
  
Rows and rows of books. Jensen doesn’t think he has ever seen so many in his life. He can’t see the end of the room or how many perfectly organized lines of bookshelves are in there. Jensen could probably pass the rest of his long life in there just counting.  
  
The basement keeps on lighting up as Jensen walks in, turning his head from left to right, like his brain can’t process what he just found.  
  
He knew very well that a lot of human books had been banned and taken away, but for some reason, Jensen assumed they just—destroyed them somehow. But maybe destroying books seemed too barbaric for shifters, who decided that keeping them away forever would be a good option. _Just like they did with humans, too_. Jensen swallows, feeling himself shiver for a second at that idea, Jared’s voice suddenly loud and clear in his head. “ _It’s creepy, don’t you think?”_ Yes, a little. But Jensen’s sure shifters aren’t doing it on purpose.  
  
This is probably why all the other two libraries Jensen had driven by are closed and being modified to convert them into something different. The remaining books weren’t enough, so they had to put them all in one library alone and then hide all the forbidden books in here.  
  
As Jensen keeps on walking through the hallways formed by the rows of books in shelves, he realizes most of them have labels and a sequence of numbers glued to the spines. He recognizes the numbers immediately as _their_ numbers, not humans’. The printed sequences on the labels made by complicated lines and dots are shifters numbers.  
  
It also says where each specific book came from, all the details are there. The one Jensen is currently checking used to belong to someone named _Colin Ford_. The book was retrieved from his home almost two years ago. Jensen slides two fingers over the spine of the book as he thinks that the guy who owned his book has probably been connected to a Facility for a long time by now, not knowing his real book is in here, locked in a cold basement of a library owned by aliens. _Colin_ must think he’s at home, with his family, when in reality he’s sitting along strangers in one of many Facilities, connected to an advanced machine that makes him dream a fantasy he’ll never be able to wake up from.  
  
Jensen can give that to Jared. When you think about Facilities from a human perspective they don’t sound _that_ nice. But again, shifters never did it with that intention.  
  
He slides the book out of the shelf, almost waiting for some alarm to go off, but there’s nothing. Turning the book around, Jensen finds the picture of a blue broken umbrella on the floor—like a car ran over it—along with what looks like fake blood all over it. _Mr. Mercedes_ a novel by _Stephen King_. Well, for the cover alone Jensen can guess why they decided the book wasn’t appropriate.  
  
The book right next to the one Jensen took seems to belong to the same guy. _The Shinning_. And it seems to be written by the same author too. Jensen thinks he read somewhere about _Stephen King_ being one of the "best authors of this human century".  
  
Checking the summary of both books lets Jensen quickly guess that probably every single thing Stephen King wrote has got to be hidden in here.  
  
Jensen looks down at both books again, not sure about them. Jared had mentioned another kind of books and Jensen has to be quick before Samantha realizes he has been down there too long. Besides, he doesn’t have enough space to take too many books.  
  
But he has to take something in case he doesn’t find the specific books he’s looking for. After a long minute, Jensen decides to put them on the inside of his coat before he keeps walking through the basement filled with forbidden books. It’s even a little thrilling, knowing these have all been taken away for one reason or another and now Jensen can take them out once again. Maybe he’ll give them a read himself after Jared is done with them.  
  
Sadly, the books don’t seem to be organized alphabetically, so it’s going to be more tricky than expected to find the exact titles he memorized since the night Jared spoke about his favorite books.  
  
Jensen is down there for almost forty-five minutes when he hears someone calling his name.  
  
He stops in his tracks, holding his breath and turning around to look at the automatic door at the other side of the basement. They have closed again. Jensen needs to get out of there before someone comes downstairs and realizes he’s not in the room he’s supposed to. Hoping his steps won’t make too much noise, Jensen starts running towards the black doors, feeling some relief once he’s close enough to see the blinking red light of the scanner on the inside of the room.  
  
That’s when he realizes it, when he’s about to slide the door open and answer to the voice calling his name. _Jensen doesn’t have the card anymore._  
  
He has walked row after row, looking at the different books and trying to find what he came from in the first place, he could have dropped it anywhere.  
  
“Jensen, honey?” Mrs. Ferris muffled voice at the other side door makes his blood start to run cold. She can’t get down there without her card but she could easily ask the other employee to lend her the one he has.  
  
Jensen looks around, watching the farther lights in the basement start to turn off once the sensors don’t catch any more movement anymore. What would be better? Get caught doing something incredibly suspicious that could get any shifter thinking that Jensen is developing all the _bad_ human emotions that then pushed him to do such a thing (and could get Danneel and a Security Division wanting to take action against him), or stay locked in there for hours while Jared is alone at home?  
  
It’s stupid to get instantly worried at the idea of Jared being alone by the time Jensen should already be back home. Nobody is going to go inside the house. Why would any shifter get inside his house? _They wouldn’t._  
  
But the small possibility makes Jensen’s remaining patience disappear in thin air. He starts to check all his pockets again, thinking about running through the entire damn basement if he needs to in order to find the card.  
  
At the same time Jensen is slowly losing all self-control while locked in the one room he’s not supposed to be in, Samantha Ferris slides Rob’s card trough the scanner, waiting for the light to turn green and for the door so slide automatically to go in. She walks downstairs, calling Jensen’s name once again before opening the door for the book repairing area to peek inside.  
  
There’s nobody there and the lights are off.  
  
Then, she hears a door closing behind her, making her jump on the spot and turn around, watching Jensen walk out of the employee’s bathroom.  
  
“Jensen, honey.” She smiles at him, pressing her right hand to her chest. “You scared me!”  
  
“I’m so sorry.” Jensen smiles at her, zipping up his coat before handing her the card he found right under the locked door, half of it peeking of the room where Samantha could have seen it if she had glanced down at the floor. “I saw the bathroom sign and went in, but it _just_ occurred to me I shouldn’t have used the ones upstairs instead. My apologies.”  
  
“Oh, please, it’s okay!” She bats one hand in the air. “We were letting some shifters come here and use this one when we had to repair the ones in the first floor anyway.”  
  
“You’re so kind.” Jensen puts one of his hands on her shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze. “And I did found the book. Is in there in the pile of books that need to be fixed.” He studies her face, waiting for her to make any kind of confused expression since Jensen is full of shit right now. He doesn’t know if there’s any pile or a queue of books waiting to be fixed.  
  
Yet all Samantha does is smile in return.  
  
“That’s wonderful news! I told you it had to be here somewhere.”  
  
“Thank you for letting me come down and check. I feel much better now.”  
  
Ms. Ferris nods in return but then stops and squints for a second, pursing her lips. Jensen holds his breath, mouth going dry as he uses the hand in the right pocket of his coat to push one of the books deeper inside.  
  
“Are you sure you’re alright, Jensen? Your face is red and you’re sweating.” Samantha brings her hand up, pressing it to his forehead. “And your forehead is warm, too.”  
  
Because Jensen ran half the basement in this warm coat and then proceeded to freak out right next to the locked door.  
  
“I was sick a couple weeks ago. Seems that tonight’s storm isn’t helping to my recovery.”  
  
Jared must be a better teacher than Jensen expected, because Ms. Ferris believes his lie instantly. She grabs onto Jensen’s arms as they go upstairs, telling Jensen he needs to take care of himself. She believes he’s always exposed to all kind of sickness working at the Hospital all the time, taking care of other shifters as the sweet and kind healer she thinks Jensen is.  
  
“But of course, I don’t have to tell you how to take care of the flu. A healer would know.” She pats Jensen’s hand and gives her a smile. “Are you taking any books with you?”  
  
“Not tonight.” Jensen says with a friendly expression. At least not the ones she’s talking about. “I just came to the library because I was worried about that history book.”  
  
Samantha takes the opportunity to insist how polite and wonderful Jensen is once again, showering him in more compliments for coming to the library when it’s raining and he’s sick just because of a book she knew was somewhere in here all along. Jensen thinks that if Jared was here he would be rolling his eyes to the back of his head. Jensen thinks Mrs. Ferris is sweet, yet she goes a little overboard with her compliments. It’s a bit much.  
  
Jensen wishes her a good night and waves his hand at the guy he saw before, taking his umbrella from where he left it right next to the entry on his way out.  
  
Of course it would be there.  
  
No other shifter is walking out of that library with stolen things that night. Just Jensen.  
  
  
  
  


 

—

 

  
  
  
  
When he walks in the house, Jared is already waiting there for him, sitting on the chair closest to the door. There are two cups on the coffee table, and for what Jensen guesses they are both cold now. Next to the cups there are three DVD movies and a bowl full of popcorn. Jensen feels an instant pang of guilt for being late, guessing that Jared was probably planning a movie night since it's been raining for a while. Jared mentioned something about humans doing this kind of stuff when there was a bad weather.  
  
Jared jumps out of the chair as soon as Jensen walks in.  
  
“You took longer than usual to come back.” Jared mumbles immediately, seeming nervous as he nibbles on his lower lip. “Are you alright?”  
  
Jensen nods, giving Jared a big smile that makes the human frown in return.  
  
“I’m sorry I’m late, but I think this might make it up for it.”  
  
Jared frown grows bigger, wrinkles appearing on his forehead and between his eyebrows. Jensen shoves his hand in the right pocket of his coat, pulling out a heavy book with mountains drawn on the cover.  
  
_“The Hobbit!”_ Jared cries out in delight, eyes widening as he stares as the book like is the most wonderful thing he has seen. “Where did you get that?”  
  
Jensen nods in return. “And other ones too. I don’t know if you like Stephen King at all, and I could only find the seventh book of that wizard boy you also told me about, but—”  
  
Before Jensen realizes it, Jared is crossing the space between them and throwing his arms around Jensen's back, hugging him tight, face pressed to Jensen0s neck. Jensen is too startled to do anything at first, but after a couple seconds of Jared keeping his arms wrapped around him while repeating _“thank you, thank you, thank you”_ over and over again, Jensen smiles and hugs Jared back, pressing his nose to the top of Jared’s head for only a couple seconds.  
  
It’s strange. He and Jared use the same shampoo, but somehow, Jared smells better than anything Jensen remembers. It makes Jensen wish the hug could last just a little bit longer so he could keep on surrounding himself with the nice scent.  
  
Jared pulls away after a long moment, cheeks and nose bright pink, but that dimpled smile Jensen has grown to like so much right there, making Jensen’s chest flare in happiness.  
  
They leave the movie night for another occasion, Jared seems to have forgotten about it, too distracted checking all the books Jensen could sneak out of the library.  
  
Before getting in the house Jensen wondered if he should rip off the labels that indicated where the books came from since he didn’t want to trigger Jared with the details of humans being taken away. But there’s no way Jared could understand since it's all written using the shifter alphabet. Besides, it felt wrong to take away the history of the owners of each book.  
  
Jensen warms up his coffee and Jared’s chocolate for them to drink while Jared freaks out with every single book, almost bouncing on the couch while he talks and talks about every single one of them. Apparently, Jensen made a good call, Jared seems to be into Stephen King as well.  
  
They spend the night discussing Jared’s new _old_ books and how Jensen got them. Jared seems both fascinated and horrified about Jensen sneaking in the basement. He looks like his eyes are going pop out of his skull when Jensen gives him the details about the endless rows of banned books. Jared tells Jensen to _never_ go back in there because _“what if you get caught, Jensen? No way!”_ but Jared seems so happy with everything Jensen got for him that Jensen is sure this is not going to be his last visit to the locked room in the basement of Mrs. Ferris' library.  
  
The books have Jared with a smile from ear to ear for days. He does nothing but talk about the plot of each book when Jensen comes back from work or when he wakes up early enough for them to have breakfast together before Jensen leaves. And of course during the weekends too, when Jensen can stay right there with Jared all day long.  
  
Jared starts telling Jensen about how he wrote a really good essay about one of Stephen King’s books when he was in High School, which eventually leads them to more topics about Jared’s past.  
  
And he keeps on going from there, talking about things Jared has never spoken about before, sharing more and more details about his life. Before he wouldn’t mention anybody by name, but now Jensen knows how everyone in Jared’s family is called and that the best friend he had been running away with is named Chad. For all the stories Jared shares, that _Chad_ guy sounds like a really weird human. Even for human standards. When Jensen points that out to Jared, all he does is laugh again and shrug before going _“Of course he’s weird. It’s Chad!”_  
  
Jensen has no clue what that’s supposed to mean, but he rolls with it. Seems like he’s not getting any other explanation for each strange story apart from “ _It’s Chad.”_  
  
Jared seems to be opening up and happy to tell Jensen everything he was uncomfortable talking about before, yet there are some moments Jensen can tell Jared is holding back, catching himself mid-phrase and shutting up again, looking down nervously and then completely changing the topic. Jensen always pretends not to notice and never makes a comment about it, but it seems like Jared feels quite awkward when he lets slip something he wasn’t supposed to.  
  
For what Jensen has noticed, it especially happens when they touch the topic of relationships and love.  
  
It seems a touchy subject for Jared, and while Jensen wonders why, he doesn’t want to press on the matter. Maybe Jared had a bad experience and doesn’t even want to talk about? Jensen isn’t an expert on the topic himself, so he doesn’t have room to speak about romance either. While love seems to be a universal thing—it doesn’t change no matter the planet or the specie—Jensen doesn't such a big personal experience regarding it.  
  
Sure, he loves in the more common way. He loves all shifters he knows or not, loves his patients, loves animals, loves the planets he lives in and loves the stars and the vastness of the Universe. But that is _general_ love, not the undying love you read about in human novels where you feel such thing for one person alone. And while shifters _do_ believe in life partners and finding the one you care about even more than the rest, it really hasn’t happened to Jensen yet.  
  
Maybe it’s the same for Jared? In which case, he shouldn’t be embarrassed. Jensen has lived much longer than Jared and hasn’t experienced that type of love yet, there’s nothing wrong with it.  
  
But then again, Jensen has been learning that he’s no expert in human emotions, so it might be better to leave it alone. He still remembers his massive failure when trying to make Jared forgive him when he was mad at Jensen, the whole flowers charade he pulled was embarrassing. And sure, now they always have flowers in the house because Jared likes them, but Jensen fucked that one up at first for sure. He doesn’t want to do that again.  
  
At the same time, and to Jensen’s surprise, the one subject Jared has been opening up about more and more is about his mother. Jensen can only guess, of course, but it seems like he has a long time wanting to talk about Sheri but never being able to. Jensen sits by his side and lets Jared talk about her for as long as he wants to without interrupting, smiling along when is a happy memory or reaching over and placing his hand over Jared’s whenever he starts to tear up.  
  
Jensen himself has to bite his tongue and control himself when Jared tells him exactly what happened the night his mom died, chest hurting from knowing Jared had to experience something like that when he was so young.  
  
They were alone at home, a different home, a big house in San Antonio. Sheri had always wanted a big house, she would always tell that to Jared while playing outside in their backyard. She wanted a big house since she was little, and she had loved their house since the moment they moved in along with Jared's dad, two weeks after getting married. Jared says it would break her heart to know that after she died they sold the property and moved away.  
  
The memories were too painful to keep the house of Sheri’s dream after her death.  
  
It happened one night, a normal night during the summer. Jared’s dad was working, his brother was at a friend’s house and his baby sister was spending the night with Jared’s grandparents, who always loved taking their grandkids out whenever they came by to visit. Jared was invited to ice cream and a movie too, but he didn’t want to go. Sheri had to stay home so Jared stayed too. _“I was always a momma’s boy”,_ Jared says in that moment with a sad smile.  
  
He would be with her up and down. Drag his toys around the house to sit by her side on the floor or kept her company every Sunday morning when she went grocery shopping. Jared explains that he loved his dad, but his mom was— _his mom._ Jensen knows parenting is different from humans then how it is or shifters, so he understands what Jared means when he talks about that special bond.  
  
Sheri was in the kitchen when it all started, with Jared playing with his stuffed animals close to the washing machine, waiting for her to be done cleaning so they could go upstairs to watch Jared’s favorite movie. They lived in a “good neighborhood”, as Jared explains. Nothing ever happened in that part of town. The worst thing before Sheri’s dead had been a lost bicycle that was later found after being forgotten at the ice cream place two blocks away.  
  
That’s why sometimes they wouldn’t lock the door until everyone was back home.  
  
Jared’s dad would always forget his keys and Jeff would ring like crazy whenever he was back from baseball practice, waking up Megan from her nap just after Sheri had been able to make her fall asleep. And it was a good neighborhood. People did that. They left the house unlocked until it was nighttime and everyone was back home and going to sleep.  
  
It reminds Jensen of shifters for a second. You don’t lock your door unless you’re worried someone who doesn’t belong in there might try to come in. You don’t need locks when you feel safe. Jensen felt safe here, that’s why he never locked the doors, that’s why Jared could get inside the house in the first place.  
  
Now Jensen locks everything, because he worries someone might come in looking for Jared.  
  
Sheri didn’t think anyone would come looking for her or whatever things of value they had in the house. She and Jared heard a loud crashing noise coming from the living room—what Jared later found out was the noise of the guy kicking the door open. He meant to come in and leave as soon as possible, thinking the place was alone.  
  
Sheri heard the noise and then screamed when she saw a guy with a gun in the house of her dreams in the middle of the safest neighborhood in San Antonio.  
  
She picked Jared up and ran upstairs, with Jared scared like he had never been while clinging to her, asking her what was going on, wondering why he could hear someone chasing them.  
  
Jared’s mom put him in the closet in her room and told him to stay there. Sometimes Jared would play in his parents’ room, pretend the big closet was a cave and his mom’s shoes were the hidden treasures left by pirates. For a second Jared ha wondered if it was a game, but Sheri’s tears along with her scared smile made Jared understand it was real.  
  
He waited sitting inside the closet, pressing his hands to his ears while keeping his eyes squeezed closed. Just like she told him to do. But Jared could still hear it, the sound of the gun going off and then the horrible, terrible silence.  
  
And in the house of Sheri’s dreams, Jared sat in the closet of her room, crying and covering his ears, waiting for the voice that was supposed to call him. But the voice never came along.  
  
Jared never heard his mother say his name again.  
  
After Jared is done telling Jensen the story, they sit side by side on the couch. Jared is hugging his legs, wrapped in a blanket while drinking the glass of water Jensen got for him. Jensen can still see the wet lines on Jared’s cheeks after how much he cried and Jensen wishes he could lean over and clean with them with his thumbs.  
  
There’s nothing in the entire Universe that breaks Jensen’s heart like the vision of Jared suffering.  
  
“I do agree humans were fucked up.” Jared nods, sniffing. “You guys are right on that one. Not all of us, sure, but maybe you do have a point when you say we’re all capable of being evil.”  
  
_Not you_ , thinks Jensen instantly, but he doesn’t say it. Jared’s different. Jensen has shared with him, he sees him day and night, Jensen _knows_ Jared. He’s not bad.  
  
Maybe Jared is the one who was right all along and shifters didn’t stop to think that perhaps some humans had good in them. Because when Jensen looks at Jared’s face, he can only see goodness in a boy who had a past full of painful memories and suffering.  
  
Jensen sees Jared and all he feels are good things. The good human emotions, the ones that make Earth so special.  
  
If there was ever an exception in the human race, it has to be Jared.  
  


 


	11. Chapter 11

  
—Part Eleven—  
(Jared)

 

 

  
  
Jared _has_ to tell Jensen, he decides the next Sunday morning while he watches the shifter pour them cereal for breakfast, following the lines of Jensen’s forearms and the trail of freckles that go under the short sleeve.  
  
He has to tell him _now_.  
  
There are two options: he either tells him using an appropriate explanation or he ends spilling it out by mistake while discussing with Jensen about his High School years or whenever Jensen makes basic questions about human relationships.  
  
Of course Jared doesn’t _have_ to tell anybody about his sexual orientation, he can keep it to himself all his life if he damn pleases, but it seems almost ridiculous that even when he's living with an alien Jared has to stay in the closet. He did it with his family and most people he knew for years and is incredibly tiring. Besides, Jared _wants_ to tell Jensen. He wants to be able to answer all his questions about dating, how love feels between humans and even if Jared has ever kissed anybody before.  
  
You would think that at least after most humans were hunted and caged down Jared could openly state that, _yes, he likes dudes_.  
  
Then again, he’s not exactly sure how shifters feel on that matter. Jensen has been just as vague about his own love life—probably because Jared violently changes the topic whenever they get a little close to it—so Jared is not really clear on how sexuality works among shifters.  
  
Shifters seem too into the whole _peace and love_ ideals to get to the level of hatred humans could have for queer people, yet Jared is horribly nervous about Jensen finding it _weird_. What if he thinks that’s another reason why humans were strange and had no hope?  
  
What if he thinks is wrong?  
  
Jared had enough of that for a lifetime after living in Texas most of his life. At least in New York he could be a little bit more open about it, but when he was younger he kept it secret.  
  
Jared likes his life with Jensen now. He _likes_ Jensen. _A lot._ He’s still not dealing with the meaning of that but there’s no denying it.  
  
What if telling this part about himself will change everything and he has to live with an alien who thinks that Jared feeling attracted to guys is fucked up? He doesn’t want to screw it up. But he also doesn’t want to hide who he is from Jensen. If they are doing this, Jared staying with Jensen until—well just staying with Jensen, he can’t keep on pretending that he doesn’t mind hiding his sexuality. Jared has done that for long enough.  
  
So, he convinces himself to tell Jensen that he’s gay and hope for the best. Shifters don’t seem to be like humans at all, so Jared hopes Jensen doesn’t have that awkward reaction when you tell a straight man you are into guys just to have him start to act weird around you because he thinks that means you’re into him. Well—actually Jared is kind of into Jensen. He already admitted to himself that he finds Jensen very attractive but that’s _not_ the point here.  
  
Jared’s only stating his sexuality, he’s not giving Jensen any details about the weird inter-species attraction.  
  
And so, in the next days, Jared tries. He tries to bring it up to Jensen when they are watching one of those boring shifter movies on TV and there is a classic heterosexual kiss on the screen. He tries to say _Jensen “I have had kisses like that, but only with boys”,_ but instead Jared ends sinking into the couch and biting his tongue for the next two hours of the movie. Then, Jared tries during dinner while Jensen cooks and Jared explains what Prom night is when you’re in High School and what a big deal it seems to be back then, just for you later on completely forget it ever happened. When Jensen asks who he went to the dance with, Jared wants to say _“With my friends because I was scared to say yes to the guy who invited me”._ He wants to explain he wanted to have another boy as his prom date but almost nobody in his school knew he’s gay.  
  
Instead, Jared just shrugs and mumbles _“no date, just some friends”_ and then proceeds to completely change the topic of conversation.  
  
Jared hates that he can’t do it. That he can’t look at Jensen and just say it. _I like men_. Only three words. Jared doesn’t have to say more than that.  
  
And then, finally, Jared decides he had enough and tells Jensen all about it one afternoon when they are eating lunch together. But it’s only because Jared has been trying and failing so many times that he’s incredibly pissed at himself. Therefore, Jared ends up almost _yelling_ it at Jensen in the middle of a conversation that has _nothing_ to do with it.  
  
Jensen is in the middle of explaining how it felt to live and breath underwater in one of the planets he previously visited when Jared slams his hands on the table, cutting Jensen off and making him give a surprised glance at Jared. But Jared doesn’t even care he looks like he lost his mind because Jensen has no problem sharing every single thing Jared asks about but Jared can’t say he’s gay out loud. Jensen can speak for hours and Jared can’t say _three words._  
  
“Are you alright?” Jensen mumbles, clearly worried. Jared doesn’t say anything in return, breathing hard and closing his hands into fists over the table. “Is it the food? Or maybe the story? I know I can give too many details about the anatomy of each body I have morphed into when we talk about this topic, but I can make it less—”  
  
“I only care about anatomy if it’s the male anatomy!” Jared snaps loudly, like he’s indeed out of his mind. Jared’s breathing hard and his hands are shaking a little.  
  
Jensen stops talking again, blinking and making the most utterly confused face Jared has seen on him so far.  
  
“You— _what?”_  
  
“Yeah, you heard it!” Jared yells again, snapping his head up to look at Jensen, face starting to burn. God, he’s not making any sense and he’s freaking out already. “I just—I don’t care for girls. I mean, yeah I do in a friendly way. Sandy was my friend, you know?”  
  
Jared nods repeatedly and Jensen nods slowly in return, squinting at Jared. Yeah, it doesn’t seem like he’s getting what Jared’s saying at all.  
  
“But-but, you see. We humans—“Jared pats his chest with one hand, and swallows loudly. “Sometimes we have attractions, _different_ attractions. Everyone says it should be girls and boys playing house together at the park but sometimes a boy wants to play house with another boy, right? And that’s--that’s fine! And is not weird!”  
  
He’s trying so hard to make it sound casual while freaking out with the option of Jensen thinking Jared is doing something wrong. He doesn’t want Jensen to give him weird stares or completely change how he behaves around Jared. He doesn’t want Jensen to stop reaching out when Jared’s sad or casually touching him when they are joking around. Jared likes this. He likes their friendship, he likes Jensen and it sucks that something as simple as this could change everything.  
  
“Jared.” Jensen starts to speak again when Jared doesn’t say anything else, looking down at his hands and rubbing them nervously. He looks up slowly when Jensen gives him a gentle tap on his chin. “I hope this doesn’t rude but you’re not making any sense right now. Is this—another human thing I’ll take me a while to get?”  
  
Fuck. Jared hopes not.  
  
“I’m different.” Jared whispers “My attraction is different than many humans I lived with used to have. And maybe is different than the attraction you shifters have.”  
  
“Everybody is different.” Jensen replies with a little smile.  
  
“And that doesn’t make them bad, right? You believe that, don’t you? Y-You guys go all over the Universe meeting different species and changing, so you have to believe that just because someone is different doesn’t make them bad!”  
  
Jensen can’t be like all the homophobic douchebags Jared has always hidden from. Shifters say they are good, they say the love every living thing no matter what. It has to include Jared being queer. It _has_ to.  
  
“ _Jared_ —Jared!” Jensen grabs him by his shoulders, making him stop for a second. “Of course being different is not bad. I really don’t understand what you’re trying to say but—”  
  
“I’m gay!”  
  
Jared yells and then the living room goes silent except for the noise of his harsh breath. He stares at Jensen, cheeks starting to blush as he grips his hands into fists so they will stop shaking, heart almost bursting out of his chest.  
  
“I—I like guys.” Jared adds in a whisper. “I’m not attracted to women at all. Just men. Romantically a-and, you know, sexually. Always have and, well, always will.”  
  
Jensen let’s go of his shoulders and sits back in his chair, blinking while giving Jared a blank stare. Jared swallows nervously, refraining himself from snapping and groaning _“Say something!”_ feeling like he’s going to have an anxiety attack from Jensen’s lack of response when Jared just came out of the closet.  
  
 _“Oh.”_ Jensen mumbles at last, nodding a couple times and shrugging. “Alright.”  
  
And just like that, he goes back to cutting and eating his fake space meat, like Jared just made a fuzz just to tell him that his favorite ice cream flavor is strawberry. They might as well be talking about the weather and Jared could have just confessed that he prefers rainy days over sunny ones.  
  
“T-That’s it?” Jared frowns for a second. He has been killing himself over how to tell Jensen and he still feels like he’s going to have a heart attack after finally spitting it out, and _That’s all?_ “Alright?”  
  
Jensen stops eating, frowning and then making a face.  
  
“Uh, is this one of those human moments where I should say something traditional?” Jensen rubs the back of his neck, now obviously feeling bad. “I’m sorry, Jared, is there anything I should—do? You can tell me and I will. I’m so bad with some human cultural responses, I need to start reading more into that.”  
  
“Cultural responses?” Jared shakes his head, moving his hands in the air. “No, no! There is no tradition about this! I meant—is it okay? You don’t mind that I like guys?” He starts smiling at the possibility, relieved to see Jensen is still being the same as always. “You don’t think is bad?”  
  
“Well, of course not.” Jensen frowns in return, crossing his arms over his chest. “Why would something natural be bad?”  
  
“I—don’t know, actually. Some humans thought it was.”  
  
Jensen sighs, shaking his head like he does every time Jared tells him something disappointing about the human race. This time, Jared completely agrees with him. Jared never quite understood why so many people had problems with different sexual orientations.  
  
“Jared, you love who you love.” Jensen leans in, leaving one hand on Jared’s shoulder and squeezing it reassuringly. Jared is so fucking glad the touch is as normal and casual as it has been for weeks. “There’s nothing to argue about that and there’s certainly nothing bad or wrong about it. Species all over the universe are different, they like different things, love in their own way. And who you like is fine.”  
  
It’s basically music to Jared’s ears. He lets out a sigh and leans against the chair, feeling like he can breathe properly for the first time in days. _Jensen doesn’t mind._ Closing his eyes, Jared lets himself laugh out loud over how ridiculous he was the past days when Jensen is absolutely okay with this.  
  
When he opens his eyes again, smile still in place, Jensen is giving him a curious stare but smiling in return.  
  
“So, for shifters, relationships between two beings of the same sex are normal?” Jared asks, trying to be as general as possible. He wants to know if it’s okay between species in general.  
  
“Yeah. My two closest friends are partners. Have been for more years than I can count, and they are both males.”  
                             
They spend the rest of their meal discussing how different sexual and romantic orientations have always been normal for Jensen’s race. There’s no rejection or hatred for those who feel attracted to the same sex. For them, it's all the same. They only care everyone is happy. Besides, Jensen insists shifters usually fall for personality, goodness and what’s inside, not the physical appearance or gender. They change constantly, so they know that how one looks is subjective. Their bodies change but what’s inside is the same. Jensen will always be Jensen no matter what he looks like. That’s what matters for shifters when they fall in love.  
  
While Jared still finds the eternal peace and love mentality a little creepy, he thinks this is quite nice. Jensen has always lived in a society where being yourself is fine. Jared could only dream of sitting down with his dad and big brother to let them know he was never going to get the girlfriend they kept on asking for.  
  
“What about adoption and having kids?”  
  
“It depends on how reproduction works on each body we morph into and what the shifter prefers to do with their bodies.” Jared nods along as Jensen explains. It makes sense. Having kids must be easier or harder depending the kind of creature you are, he supposes. “But at least here on earth, most of them choose in-vitro pregnancies. There are many female shifters who like being surrogates for shifters who can’t have kids themselves. I have told you I do many in-vitro procedures at work.”  
  
Yeah, Jared just guessed it was for heterosexual couples who couldn’t conceive.  
  
“And that’s—legal? Accepted by all of you?”  
  
“Of course it is!” And Jensen actually looks blown away that Jared is asking in the first place. Jared doesn’t want to give Jensen more reasons to think humans are a walking disgrace, but really, Jensen has no idea how things were with some humans and their homophobic laws and rules.  
  
“Well, it’s not accepted among humans, so I never really told many people. My family didn’t know.” Jared shrugs, looking down at his hands once again. His entire family is gone and they never knew such an important part of himself because he was scared. “But I didn’t want to hide from you.”  
  
Jared is more than reassured to know he’s out of the closet at least to the alien he’s going to keep on living with. It’s quite nice to know that when Jensen asks him about human relationships Jared won’t have to lie or change the topic like his life depends on it. He can answer Jensen’s questions and be open about his sexual orientation. It’s a breath of fresh air.  
  
Jensen keeps on explaining more about how sexual orientations works for shifters and other species on different planets, and it pleases Jared greatly to know that different sexual orientations are wide and present all over the Universe. If humans only knew.  
  
That’s why Jared coming out to Jensen wasn’t that surprising. Jensen's used to this. He sees same-sex couples all the time, in all galaxies, all the time through his entire life. Jensen shares a little bit more about his friends Tom and Mike to help Jared feel more comfortable, which makes Jared even more interested than before since Jensen hasn’t talked about _friends_ that much.  
  
“And what about you?” Jared takes the courage to ask after they have been talking about the subject long enough to not make the question weird or intrusive. Or at least Jared hopes so. “What do you… _like?”_  
  
He hopes it sounds casual, like asking Jensen what’s his favorite ice cream flavor after Jared just answered himself, but he knows it's bullshit. Jared _wants_ to know. He can feel his palms sweating and for a quick second he remembers the silver bracelet Jensen put on him to monitor his health after Jared passed out. Thank God he doesn’t have to wear that thing anymore or the alarm that kept track of his heartbeat would be beeping like crazy right now.  
  
Luckily, Jensen takes the question as calmly as anything else.  
  
“Like I said, what matters to us is what’s inside and not the rest. So, I have been close with both female and male shifters before, but not for too long. I’m not like Tom and Mike, who found each other from the start.”  
  
Something warm and pleasing spreads through Jared’s chest, and for a second he has to hold himself from smiling. Both guys and girls. Alright then. Jensen’s not straight. It shouldn’t mean anything to Jared but somehow it pleases him just as much as the idea of Jensen not having long-term relationships so far. It’s ridiculous, because, what does Jared care? Shouldn’t mean a damn thing.  
  
But it does. It makes Jared strangely happy to know that Jensen hasn’t found anybody that especial. Is stupidly pleasing to sit and think about it.  
  
“So no partner so far, huh?” Jared clicks his tongue, nodding along and not being able to hide a little smile. “Probably because you’re so cranky.”  
  
Jensen throws his head back, laughing loudly before pushing Jared away playfully, both of them sitting together in Jared’s room by this point. Jared has been insisting about them hanging out in his room more often, mostly because he’s proud of how good it’s looking now that he decorated it and he kind of wants to show off his good taste to Jensen.  
  
“I’ll give you cranky.” Jensen huffs, squinting at Jared, who laughs and lays down on his bed, Jensen sitting by his feet. “Wait a second. Is this why you would always change topics whenever I asked you questions about human relationships?”  
  
“You noticed?” Jared makes a face, a little embarrassed of how obvious he was but grateful that Jensen never asked about it before. Jared wouldn’t have known how to explain it then. “Well— _yeah_ , I didn’t know how you would react.”  
  
It'ss not like he wanted to lie to Jensen. And they weren’t exactly lies either, he was just not telling him the whole story. Jared would take away chunks of each explanation he would give Jensen and then change the topic when they were getting too close to the parts where Jared would have to explain that he was speaking about relationships with guys and not girls.  
  
“So, can you tell me now?” Jensen asks, sitting more comfortably on the bed to face Jared, making that interested expression once more, like Jared is about to tell him the secrets of the Universe. Funny and ironic, because Jared’s pretty sure Jensen knows much more of that than him.  
  
“I suppose, yes.” There’s no reason to hide it now that Jared knows Jensen won’t mind the most specific details.  
  
“Did _you_ ever have a partner?”  
  
“Not in the way you shifters do, nothing that serious.” Jared shakes his head, closing his eyes and letting out a little sigh. He relates finding a _partner_ —as Jensen always says—to getting married. Jared never got even close to that. “But I did have a boyfriend when I was in High School. And we had to keep it secret because we were both in the closet. Only Chad knew.”  
  
He can still remember how it felt, discovering that a guy liked him, that a guy was hitting on him and waiting for Jared to show he was interested too. And sure, they had to hide from start to end and it was pretty bad when it was all done and said—only some months after it all began. But still, Jared got to experience that before the Earth stopped being a planet inhabited by humans and they got taken away.  
  
He could hold hands under restaurant tables with a boy and kiss in the School’s hallways when everyone else was gone.  
  
Jared smiles at the few good memories, eyes still closed as he remembers how nice it had been to be asked to be someone’s boyfriend when the person at the other person had been a boy too.  
  
“His name was Stephen.”


	12. Chapter 12

—Part Twelve—  
(Jensen)

 

  
  
  
  
For some reason—and no matter how close Jensen got to Jared in the time they have been living together—Jensen never expected to get to this point. He never expected _this_ to happen to _him_.  
  
Not even after he first lied to Alona to say he was sick and miss work so he could stay home and help Jared recover, not when he also lied to Danneel or even when he _lied and lied_ nonstop to Mrs. Ferris so he could steal banned books for the human Jensen is hiding in his house.  
  
 _It was all for Jared._  
  
And yet somehow, Jensen found an excuse for it all. To help the sick human. To make sure Jared was okay before letting him go. A white lie that didn’t hurt anyone. It was just to make Jared happy. One after the other, endless reasons to do the wrongs things he had been doing.  
  
But not even Jensen can excuse this one from himself.  
  
He _has them_ now. What you’re supposed to call the Security Division and your accommodator about and consider it a number one emergency.  
  
The violent, deadly human emotions.  
  
The _bad_ ones, the few that make shifters scared to come to Earth no matter how interesting this planet might be.  
  
And Jensen, after all this time with Jared, has started to develop them. Silent, like a virus with no symptoms. They have been growing inside of him until this point, and is now too late control or stop them.  
  
They are no longer at a point where they can be eradicated. They are not a single reaction of a new body. They are not the body’s emotions anymore. They are Jensen’s emotions by now.  
  
He’s utterly and completely fucked. And is a good thing they have such word in the human language to illustrate this situation because it doesn’t exist in Jensen’s native language.  
  
He’s fucked because of what Jared has awakened in him.  
  
Jensen sits on his bed, the clock nailed to the wall indicating is past two in the morning. It doesn’t matter though. Jensen really doubts he can go to sleep tonight. Staring to his palms, Jensen opens and closes his hands, trying to get used to the tingling on his finger tips and the need deep inside of him of just grip them in a fist, crack his knuckles and then hit something.  
  
Possibly something that will _hurt_ so he can let that some of the uncomfortable feeling out trough the pain.  
  
Reading the literature about how experiencing something like this doesn’t really give it any justice. Jensen is sitting in his bed, breathing hard and trying to make some sense of his head.  
  
Not even his healer knowledge can save him now.  
  
He guesses that blaming Jared is wrong. All Jared did was answer the questions Jensen wanted to know now that Jared had opened up about something that seemed to be a huge secret among humans. Attraction towards the same gender seems to be way more complicated on Earth than it ever was anywhere else Jensen ever visited.  
  
He has known all along that humans were judgmental and didn’t understand what was different from them, the reason why living among them in peace was never an option for shifters, but sometimes Jensen forgets what degree that hatred could reach.  
  
Jared could never tell his own family such an important part of himself, which for Jensen sounds incredibly painful. Feeling the need to hide from your own family, the people who are _supposed_ to love you the most sounds almost haunting.  
  
And while in shifter society announcing who you are interested in isn’t anything that relevant, when you have to hide such a thing, it acquires a completely different meaning. Jensen understands why Jared would feel like he had to hide. He was scared, he didn’t want to be rejected. Sometimes lying about who you are can be safer than being violently hated.  
  
Jensen’s glad Jared didn’t want to hide from him. It made Jensen want to show in any physical way he could how much it mattered to him that Jared trusted him that much, but Jensen is still learning the appropriate moments to lean in and _touch_.  
  
They moments when Jensen has had physical contact with Jared usually come out naturally whenever he’s around the human, but this specific moment of Jared revealing something that he kept hidden for so long was such a big step for Jared that Jensen didn’t want to screw it up by doing something that could be inappropriate.  
  
And after Jared admitted that he has a preference for males rather than females—just like Tom, actually—the _"Questions and Answers"_ session began. Now Jensen was convinced he could get all the answers Jared had been dissecting before for obvious reasons. But there was no need to do that anymore, Jared could explain all the concepts about human relationships and love that Jensen had troubles understanding from books and cold medical records.  
  
He didn’t expect this would happen in consequence.  
  
Jensen feels that something burns in his chest again, nostrils flaring as he fights the itching need to let all that frustration out as he thinks about the events that unfolded that night. Letting out a small groan, Jensen lets himself fall back onto to bed, head starting to hurt. He’s going to get a serious headache from remembering every single thing Jared said while fighting with the growing discomfort inside of himself.  
  
 _Stephen Amell._ The name makes echo in his head, brain even supplying the tone of voice Jared used to _sigh_ it out every single time he pronounced it. It makes Jensen’s fingers twitch on the bed.  
  
Stephen, the only real relationship Jared had before shifters took over Earth. Stephen, the only other guy at Jared’s school who seemed to also be attracted to males like Jared did. Stephen, who could make Jared laugh whenever he was feeling down and would wait until Jared’s debate team practice was over during Thursday afternoons to drive him home or make out with him once the classroom was empty.  
  
Stephen, who maybe didn’t get to be Jared’s first kiss—since a girl convinced Jared to kiss her at the playground when he was a kid—but got far enough to be the only one Jared ever got physical with. The one Jared _slept_ with when they were only sixteen.  
  
Jensen feels his own fingers grip on the blankets under him, harsh breathing getting deeper and harsh.  
  
 _Anger_. Jensen doesn’t need to be a healer to know this is _it_. The real deal, what ultimately caused so much problems among humans for centuries. Sure, he can detect all the physical reactions, but they are far from being the worst part of it. His face and body feel hot while his hands sweat cold, his heart beat keeps on speeding up, his muscles feel tight and he’s basically panting. Jensen feels shaky and his stomach keeps on turning just as his headache grows out of proportions.  
  
The symptoms are awful, but is nothing compared to how it feels on the inside.  
  
There’s anger inside him, pumping everywhere along with his blood and Jensen can’t do anything to stop it.  
  
What this anger causes is a rather unpleasant mixture of needs. Jensen feels like pressing his face into a pillow and yelling his frustration out. He wants to put on his sneakers and run until his legs are aching as bad as everything seem to be burning inside of his chest. Jensen feels the need of hurting others. He wants to ball his hands into fists and crash them into something, preferably the vague image of a sixteen-year-old boy kissing Jared at the empty hallways of his High School.  
  
Letting out a stranded gasp, Jensen sits back up on the bed and hides his face between his hands, breathing so hard at this point he’s surprised he hasn’t woken up Jared in the room in front of his.  
  
This is ridiculous. This is not Jensen. He doesn’t believe in violence, he finds any desire for harming any living being repulsive.  
  
“Then why…?” Jensen mumbles to himself, staring at his shaky hands before cleaning the sweat from his forehead.  
  
Why the idea of mildly hurting the guy who made Jared sigh his name out and smile the way he did feels so pleasant in Jensen’s head?  
  
Jensen’s sick.  
  
Sick with human emotions. Sick with human needs and human violence.  
  
And more than anything, Jensen’s sick with human _jealousy_.  
  
Which is absolute and utter _nonsense_. Why would Jensen feel jealous in the first place? Is something he has never felt in his life. He’s never been jealous for what others possess or have done before. Jensen has never been jealous of Danneel for being better at living on Earth and feeling comfortable in her human body, he has never been jealous of Tom and Mike for finding each other and being happy for years and years while it seems like Jensen’s destined to not find anyone in the entire Universe. He’s not jealous of his patients traveling together an having someone there on Earth already like Matt and Mandy. He’s not jealous of the fame, love and recognition his grandfather has among shifters even after passing away—even if Jensen’s aware he’ll never reach that level as a healer himself.  
  
Jensen has never been jealous before of any of those things.  
  
And yet here he is, dealing with the waves of anger, envy and frustration because Jared loved someone so much it still makes him smile when he thinks about him. _Stephen_.  
  
It feels like drowning on nothing but air, seeing bright red whenever Jensen remembers all the things Jared said, the way he would smile, how absolutely happy he seemed whenever he named something he shared with Stephen.  
  
Did Jared ever smile that bright around Jensen? _Because of Jensen?_  
  
Jensen pushes himself out of the bed violently, pushing the door of his bathroom open when it doesn’t slide fast enough, washing his face with cold water as he tries to make any sense of what’s currently going in his head _. In his entire body_.  
  
There’s no logic explanation on feeling this way because jealousy is nothing but the fear of losing something you already have. Or that someone you already have will prefer somebody else.  
  
Jensen doesn’t _have_ Jared. He doesn’t belong to him. Jared is his own person and he can prefer anybody he wants and it shouldn't make Jensen feel a damn thing in response. Sure, Jensen has been deeply interested in helping and protecting Jared since the start and by now Jared is his friend, his roommate, he’s the person Jensen spends more time on Earth with.  
  
Jensen is supposed to get somehow protective of Jared, right? How can he not?  
  
Jared is— _he’s Jensen’s human._  
  
Looking up, Jensen finds his own stressed out reflection staring back at him in the bathroom mirror. His jaw is set and his nostrils flaring whenever he breaths out harshly. There’s no need to press his fingers to his pulse to know how fast his heart is beating.  
  
Who knew anger and jealousy could feel this strong, almost blinding. No wonder humans had such a hard time dealing with it. Jensen only started experiencing it tonight and he’s already feeling like absolute shit.  
  
How is Jensen supposed to process this? He should alarm Danneel and someone else but Jensen knows he’s not going to. That could mean the Security Division coming to get him checked, it could get Jared caught and Jensen instant rejection from Earth. He would have to leave, choose another planet to visit and Jared would have to escape to avoid being taken to a Facility.  
  
And then Jensen would never be able to see Jared ever again.  
  
The pain that last option causes him is way worse than the feeling of jealousy and anger.  
  
If that ever happened, Jensen would carry the pain wherever he goes, forever crushed inside by not being able to see Jared again no matter how many times he changes his body to form a new heart.  
  
  
  
  


 

—

 

  
  
  
  
The next morning Jensen calls in sick. It’s only been weeks since he’s back at work and it could worry his supervisor and Danneel, but Jensen doesn’t really care how bad it sounds that a healer is sick again. Is just going to be one day. Jensen loves his work but dragging himself out of bed and pretending to be alright after spending most of the night awake, tormented by the feelings he barely knows how to handle, sounds like a living nightmare.  
  
He hangs up before Alona finishes wishing him a soon recovery, rolling back into the bed and pressing his face into what he realizes is the pillow Jared was hugging the night he fell asleep in Jensen’s room.  
  
Bad human emotions are horrible. How could anyone deal with them? How can Jared do this without losing his mind?  
  
Jensen sleeps in until Jared wakes up and knocks his door, bringing with himself black coffee and looking quite worried, asking Jensen if he’s feeling alright. So far Jensen hasn’t missed work since Jared recovered enough to be able to be alone at the house. And even when he stays home, he would usually be up and about since early in the morning. He’s not one to stay in bed doing nothing more than wish the burning in his chest would go away.  
  
“Hey.” Jared whispers from the door when Jensen turns on the bed, opening one eye and feeling like the daylight is going to give him a new headache. “Want some breakfast? You’re not going to work today?”  
  
Somehow, Jared’s niceness only makes the burning flare up in his chest. Is this just going to follow Jensen around forever?  
  
“No, no work today.” Jensen mumbles, closing his eyes again. “I’ll make something for breakfast in a minute.”  
  
Jared walks into the bedroom, leaving the cup of coffee on the bedside table, rich smell enough to make Jensen want to fight the annoying light and take the cup. Then, the sudden feeling of Jared’s hand on his forehead startles him, making Jensen move on the bed and open his eyes.  
  
“Huh, you seem to have some fever. Do you have any of the medicine you gave me before?”  
  
Jensen nods, mumbling where he keeps the pills in the kitchen. He knows he’s not sick but taking some of the medicine won’t kill him. He wishes there could be a cure for the horrible and confusing feelings having a human body can cause in a shifter.  
  
Jared is back almost twenty minutes later, carrying the pills along with two plates with eggs and pancakes. The smell of syrup makes Jensen's stomach make an embarrassing sound and Jared chuckles, making Jensen crack a smile in return.  
  
Oh, well. There’s no way he can resist Jared and stay in bed feeling sorry for himself now.  
  
They both sit in Jensen’s bed and keep a light chat while they eat what Jared cooked for them. Just being there with Jared seems to help with whatever is going inside of him that Jensen doesn’t quite get. But at the same time is not enough.  
  
“About what you told me last night.” Jensen says at last, unable to hold it together any longer when they are about to finish eating. “Do you miss it?”  
  
“What?” Jared mumbles, mouth full of food.  
  
“I mean—all the things you told me, what you felt and the things you shared. About that guy and all you did together. Do you miss him?”  
  
“Stephen?” Jared asks and Jensen nods in return. Jared makes a face a moment later, frowning before smiling a little bit. “No, I guess I don’t.”  
  
For only a wonderful second, it’s like everything dies out and things go back to normal. Just for a moment the fire inside of him disappears and Jensen feels like he can breathe again.  
  
“How can you not? He made you happy, you loved him—”  
  
“Woah, woah, woah!” Jared raises his hands in the air and widening his eyes. “Jesus, who said anything about love? Oh fuck, no. I wasn’t in love with Stephen.”  
  
“You…weren’t?” Is time for Jensen to frown now, not following along with what’s going on now. “But, everything you said about you two—how he made you happy, how you would do things with him you didn’t do with anyone else. The way you said his name…”  
  
Jared turns bright pink as Jensen speaks, and Jensen’s not sure if it’s because of the _“do things with him”_ that clearly includes the physical intimacy part or the fact that Jensen pointed out Jared was letting out those little sighs whenever he spoke about Stephen.  
  
“Well, yeah, he made me happy to a certain degree, but think of the context, I was only sixteen and so deep in the closet I couldn’t even see the doors to open it.” Jared jokes for a second, smiling just so. “I had never had a boyfriend or a guy who liked me before so it was amazing at first and _that’s_ what makes it a good memory. How happy I felt to be myself, but I wasn’t—” Jared purses his lips, cheeks still bright. “I wasn’t sighing because of _him_. He freaked out and dumped me after some months because he was convinced people were going to catch us. I told you that last night.”  
  
Jared did, Jensen remembers that part very clearly, but he wasn’t sure then how much it affected Jared, if he made him depressed for months and broke his heart. Jensen had _supposed_ it did because he thought Jared loved Stephen, but apparently, that’s not the case.  
  
“I’m sorry. I really did think you were in love.”  
  
“No way, I told you I didn’t have anything as serious as what you guys call getting a partner.” Jared shakes his head and his bangs go everywhere on his face. It makes Jensen smile instantly. “Sure, Stephen was a lot of first things but he wasn’t my first love. And thank God for that, dude turned out to be quite the douchebag.”  
  
Jared starts to laugh right after dissing his ex-boyfriend and Jensen joins him soon after, feeling like he could laugh forever after hearing Jared say all that.  
  
The news of Jared never being in love with anyone before might keep Jensen happy for the rest of eternity.  
  


 

 

—

 

 

  
  
The imminent arrival of Tom and Mike to Dallas is such a fuzz that everyone at the Hospital, Danneel and even Jared end finding about it. Everyone who might know Jensen are probably informed by now, and it’s simply because Mike can be a huge pain in the ass just to get under Jensen’s skin since apparently he thinks that’s the definition of  fun. Somehow _—_ probably thanks to their own accommodator _—_ Mike gets a hold of all the lines where he can locate Jensen and he makes sure to call every single one of them multiple times a day to leave the message that they are finally in town and want to meet up.  
  
Jensen spends the entire day at the Hospital running into healers and nurses that are looking for him just to let Jensen know that a shifter named Mike called ten times and to please, _please_ , return his calls. Tahmoh walks by his office at least three times that day to remind Jensen about it because Mike keeps on calling him.  
  
Danneel leaves him voice messages going _“Hey, Jensen. Your friend Mike got my number from his accommodator and he wants you to know—”_ Jensen hangs up before hearing the rest. _That they are in town_. Jensen _knows_.  
  
And when he finally gets home, he finds Jared sitting on the couch hugging his knees and giving the phone weird stares every now and then. He seems a little agitated and Jensen swears Tom is going to be single again after Jared explains that a shifter has been calling home all day and leaving messages, even threatening to drive by and crash Jensen0s house to wait for him if Jensen doesn’t call back.  
  
Jensen rubs his temples, taking deep breaths before assuring Jared everything will be alright.  
  
He hands Jared the tub of ice cream he got him on his way back home and that seems to cheer Jared up a bit, going to Jensen’s room to find something to watch on TV while eating the ice cream directly from the tub with a spoon. In the meantime Jensen stays in the living room, taking the phone and tapping the touch screen to call Mike back.  
  
“Don’t eat the whole thing!” Jensen calls out loud as the phone beeps in his ear, waiting for someone to pick up. “That can’t be your dinner or you’re going to end with a stomachache!”  
  
“You’re no fun!” Jared yells back from the room before laughing, making Jensen smile no matter how stressed he was just seconds ago.  
  
“I know that, just make sure to not—! _Hello?”_ Jensen stops yelling when he hears someone pick up at the other side of the call.  
  
“Jensen?” Tom answers back and Jensen is surprised for a second that he recognizes his voice. They haven’t been talking that much even if Jensen's friend have some months living on Earth too. The have mostly exchanged some emails and quick calls. “Hey! How’s it going? I bet you got all the ten thousand messages Mike left you.” Tom chuckles and Jensen rolls his eyes. “And who were you talking to?”  
  
“I— _nobody_ , it was the TV.” Jensen lies in a heartbeat and it should be really worrying that he’s getting so good at lying on the spot. “And yes, I believe shifters I had never even seen before at the Hospital came to me today to let me know Mike had called them. Your partner is _insane_.”  
  
Tom laughs again, like Mike’s annoying behavior is adorable. Yeah, of course Tom would. “Well, he’s excited that we can finally meet considering someone has been an anal friend, basically ignoring us the whole time we have been on Earth.”  
  
Jensen sighs, leaning back on the couch and rubbing his forehead.  
  
“I know, I know. I’m sorry, Tom, you know how I get with work and this planet is so—well, it keeps me busier than I usually am.”  
  
And at first it was work. Jensen was too focused on working at the Hospital and keeping on his human research he barely did anything beyond that. And then, well, then _Jared_ happened. And Jensen hasn’t had a second to think about anything that’s not related to the human currently eating Ben and Jerry's in his room.  
  
“Hey, it’s fine. We have always known what kind of work-obsessed friend we made planets ago.” Tom mumbles casually and Jensen can almost imagine Tom on the phone after they sent Jensen a picture of how they look in their human bodies.  
  
Tom has always been like this, calmed and put together, probably one of the nicest shifters to ever be around.  
  
And of course Tom would choose Mike as a life partner. Loud and all over the place, messy and constantly trying to make everything into a joke. Jensen has always used them as living example that opposites do attract. Maybe even more than they should.  
  
Before Jensen can say anything else, he can hear a loud yell at the other side of the call, making him pull the phone away from his ear for a second. He can also hear Tom laughing again and his two friends fake-fighting for the phone. Seems like Mike realized who’s calling.  
  
“Jensen!” He greets him a little to laugh, making Jensen decide to keep the phone away from his ear while his friend speaks, just so Mike doesn’t give him a headache. “I called you all day. You can’t ignore us now that we live in the same city, you old cranky asshole.”  
  
“Oh, you called? I didn’t realize by the entire city telling me you left me a message with them.” Jensen clicks his tongue, but he’s actually not that annoyed at Mike anymore. Hearing his friends again is making him realize how much he has truly missed them. “And I wasn’t ignoring you—and hey, where did you even learn that word?”  
  
Jensen is now familiar with human cursing thanks to Jared but he’s quite surprised Mike knows it as well.  
  
There are more noises at the other side of the call and then Tom speaks again.  
  
“We found a human movie in the place we first moved into back in California. We watched it and it was full of cursing words. Mike has been incorporating them into his language ever since.”  
  
Tom sounds rather amused about it while Mike cackles in the background, making Jensen crack a smile.  
  
“What did your accommodator say when you handed them the movie?” Jensen kind of wishes they still had it no matter which movie it is. Now Jensen knows where to get banned books if Jared gets bored of the ones Jensen found for him, but he still has no idea what happened to all the banned movies from human times. He guesses shifters also kept them stored somewhere, but is impossible to guess where that is.  
  
“Oh.” Tom makes a pause for only a second. “We didn’t give it back, actually.”  
  
Jensen sits up straight on the couch, frowning a little. “You didn’t?”  
  
“It’s just a movie, Jensen.” Tom breaths into the phone, tone as calm as ever. “I know you’re all for obeying the rules and how they exist to keep us safe so we don’t turn into the _big bad humans_ or whatnot, but is just a movie. Watching it won’t change who we are.”  
  
Jensen stays quiet after hearing Tom, phone pressed to his ear. It’s just a movie. In all the time he has been on Earth, he hasn’t heard a single shifter say that. Is just a movie. Is just a book. _Just a human_. Shifters don’t seem to question the idea of banning any trace of the human race and many of the things they even touched or owned. but Tom is absolutely right. How could one thing change who they already are?  
  
Will watching a movie make Tom and Mike as bad as the worst humans who used to cause pain and violence on Earth? No.  
  
Keeping Jared by his side will change who Jensen is? Not really. It might awaken new things he doesn’t exactly understand how to deal with _—_ he still hasn’t been thinking about the anger and jealousy he felt some days ago and doesn’t really want to analyze it too hard since he doesn’t know the answer. But it won’t ultimately change him, right? As Tom said, is just a movie.  
  
For Jensen, is just a couple emotions he feels whenever he’s around Jared.  
  
“Jensen?” Tom calls again, making snap out of his own thoughts. “You’re not going to report us, are you?”  
  
Jensen huffs, shaking his head even if Tom can’t see him. “Don’t be ridiculous. But at least tell me the movie is interesting.”  
  
Tom laughs into the phone once again. “It’s terrible, actually. But Mike loves it.”  
  
“That movie is great, shut up, Tom!” Mike groans somewhere in the background, making both shifters laugh at the same time. “And tell Jensen to get his ass here at the end of this week so we can finally see him. I swear we get more communication from him when he’s on another planet.”  
  
“You heard him.” Tom speaks next. “Friday works for you?”  
  
Jensen opens and closes his mouth, not sure of what to answer. “Well, Friday’s actually not—I’m not sure.” Jensen bites into his lower lip, looking over his shoulder at the hallway that could take him to his own room, where Jared is probably currently lying down on his bed watching something on TV.  
  
“Saturday, then?” Tom asks, like it’s a matter of changing the day.  
  
Is not that at all. Jensen hasn’t been doing anything that doesn’t revolve around Jared whenever he’s not working. He goes out sometimes to do certain things like getting more food, but even then he only takes a couple hours and he stocks the grocery bags with food Jared might like and always makes sure to bring something different that Jared will enjoy. Usually candies. But even something as common as going grocery shopping has Jared as the main focus.  
  
Not that Jared can’t stay alone, he does it  every time Jensen has to work, but is not about that. Jensen wants to be with Jared whenever he doesn’t have to be working. Is what he does now, here on Earth. Jensen works and Jared. Gets food and Jared. Goes to the library and Jared.  
  
And then Jared. And Jared _. And more Jared._  
  
Jensen doesn’t mind one bit, that’s the thing. He almost wishes he could bring Jared along to meet Tom and Mike. He’s sure they would all get along, but of course that’s too risky. His friends being okay with watching a human movie doesn’t mean they are going to be alright about meeting a real human.  
  
Jensen is not going to risk it.  
  
“Oh, come on. You can’t possibly cancel on us when we live right here too.”  
  
“I’m not, Tom. You know work is hard—”  
  
“The Hospital can survive one night of you missing some work to come have dinner. Just one night.” Tom insists and for a second it makes Jensen feel guilty to hear his tone of voice. They really haven’t seen each other in a while and they are both Jensen’s best friends. “Otherwise Mike is going to keep calling every single day.”  
  
Jensen chuckles, nodding along. He guesses one night is fine. He misses Tom and Mike, and well, he’s sure Jared won’t mind spending some alone time on Saturday night. They can spend that morning and afternoon together doing whatever Jared wants before Jensen takes off.  
  
“Sure, why not? Saturday night it is. Should I bring something?”  
  
“No, don’t worry. Just your rare presence should be enough.” Tom answers and Jensen can actually hear Mike cheering too.  
  
“See you then. Talk to you later, Tom.”  
  
Jensen hangs up and closes his eyes for a second, thinking about what on earth he’s going to tell his friends when they ask him what he has been doing on Earth apart from working. They are not going to believe Jensen has just been reading and working for months, even if that was exactly his routine before meeting Jared. This is different. They are not Danneel or Alona. They know Jensen.  
  
Maybe they’ll figure out that he’s lying.  
  
“You’re leaving on Saturday?”  
  
Jared’s voice makes Jensen sit back up, opening his eyes, finding the human leaning against a wall while holding the tub of half-finished ice cream in one hand. Jensen leaves the phone on the coffee table again, standing up and stretching his arms. He’s really tired after a day of work and hanging out with Jared while sharing the rest of that tub of ice cream doing _whatever_ together sounds fantastic.   
  
“Oh, just for the night. Those best friends I talked you about? They moved to Dallas and want us to meet this Saturday.”  
  
“Here?” Jared asks, tone wary as he gets visibly tense.  
  
“No, don’t worry Jared, we’re meeting at their place for dinner.”  
  
He can tell Jared relaxes almost immediately, sighing and leaning back into the wall, staring around the room while he nods.  
  
“Your friends moved in, huh?” Jared mumbles, nibbling on his lower lip. “How long have you known them?”  
  
“A lifetime.”  
  
Jared nods again, clicking his tongue and saying nothing in return. And then he just stands there for a whole minute, drumming his fingers on the tub of ice cream while nibbling on his lower lip. Jensen is about to ask him if he’s okay when Jared seems to snap out of it, walking towards the kitchen to leave the ice cream in the freezer.  
  
“Is there anything you want to do tonight?” Jensen calls from the living room, stepping out of his shoes and wondering if tonight Jared will give him the summary of the chunk of the books he read while Jensen was at work.  
  
“Not really.” Jared says once he walks out, shrugging. “I actually feel like sleeping in, is that okay?”  
  
Jensen frowns for a moment. “Sure, if that’s what you want.”  
  
“Yeah, I was dozing off while watching TV on your room and—” Jared yawns, stitching his arms, but if Jensen had to guess, he would say it looks kind of fake. “Is late, right? We should sleep.”  
  
“Is six in the afternoon.”  
  
Jared opens his mouth and then snaps it close, looking to the floor as his cheeks start to turn red. Jensen has learned by now that Jared usually blushes when he’s feeling nervous or embarrassed.  
  
But right now, Jensen has no clue what’s going on.  
  
“Well, so what? Is never too early for a nap, right?” Jared mumbles, crossing his arms over his chest and then speaking again before Jensen can say anything. “Right. Okay, glad we cleared that up. Goodnight and thanks for the ice cream.”  
  
And before Jensen can say a word, Jared is turning around and walking away to go back into his room.  
  
When Jensen goes to check on him a couple hours later to ask if Jared wants something to eat, he finds him curled in bed, fast asleep.  
  
Just when Jensen thought he was starting to understand humans a little bit better.  
  
As the week goes by, Jensen isn’t sure why, but he swears Jared is acting weird. Like he is both trying to ignore Jensen but also making sure they are together every minute Jensen is home. Is a strange combination of Jared saying he wants to read alone in his room and then coming out ten minutes later to sit on the kitchen counter and actually read right there while Jensen cooks. Jared doesn’t speak a word to Jensen while he does it, but he sighs hard and constantly and passes the pages as loud as possible, changing positions on the counter and jumping down to get a glass of water or a package of cookies every now and then.  
  
If that behavior means anything at all, Jensen doesn’t have a clue what it is. Jared just started doing it out of nowhere. One day he was fine and the next he’ was both ignoring Jensen while making sure Jensen doesn’t forget he’s right there.  
  
And it only gets worse as the days pass. When Jensen tries to ask Jared what’s going on with him all Jared does is laugh nervously, blush and stutter he’s absolutely fine and Jensen is imagining things. Just to seconds later get somehow mad at Jensen for even asking in the first place.  
  
Humans are incredible. Jensen has months living with one and he still doesn’t know how to solve this.  
  
When Saturday arrives, Jared’s behavior is even weirder than the rest of the week. He offers to make both breakfast and lunch for Jensen, saying he can cook anything Jensen wants. And then he indulges Jensen by asking him about his work and to please teach Jared more about constellations and how to read them. Jensen is almost sure Jared knows by now how much he enjoys talking about his healer work as he likes talking about stars and the Universe. Jared really is indulging him, trying to make his day beyond pleasant—which is not that hard, Jensen enjoys it as long as he gets to spend it by Jared’s side—but Jensen can’t guess for his life why Jared is doing all that after wanting to somehow ignore him the past days.  
  
At six, when Jensen is ready to leave after taking a shower, Jared is back in his room reading one of Jensen’s books. Which is even weirder. Jared has the books he actually likes now, he doesn’t have to stick around with the ones that he thought were boring and “full of medicine crap”.  
  
“Jared, I’m leaving!” Jensen calls from the living room, taking the keys of his car. “I’ll be back in some hours, probably not too late, but Mike will probably want me to stay longer. You don’t have to wait up if you get tired!”  
  
There is a loud noise coming from Jared’s room, like he threw something to the floor right before Jensen hears Jared’s quick steps coming down the hallway. Jared runs into the living room a second later, almost tripping with one of the chairs once he gets there, breathing hard and looking at Jensen up and down, like is the first time he sees him.  
  
“You’re leaving… _now?_ I thought you said the dinner was at seven.”  
  
“Yeah, but I want to leave with enough time ahead.” Jensen shrugs, predicting some traffic on his way there. “And even if Tom said not to take anything I think I shouldn’t arrive empty handed. Maybe I’ll stop for a cake or something like that.”  
  
Jared licks his lips and nods before looking down. Jensen turns around to put on his shoes by the door, but before he can bend over to take them, Jared’s voice makes him turn to face him once more.  
  
“You’re...coming back, right?”  
  
He’s not looking back at Jensen, eyes fixed on the floor like he didn’t say anything at all. Jensen opens his mouth, still processing what Jared just asked him. He doesn’t know what’s worse, the question itself or the tone of voice Jared just used. Jensen has heard it before, that broken little tone Jared’s voice shifts into whenever he talks about the friends he’ll never see again after shifters colonized Earth and all the family he lost.  
  
Jensen is so confused he doesn’t know where to begin. Why would Jared think that? Where did he get that idea? But it seems like Jensen won’t even get a chance to answer back, because Jared looks up suddenly, a forced smile tugging on his lips as he chuckles.  
  
“Of course you’re coming back! Yeah, that was a stupid question, ignore me.” Jared shakes his head, scratching the back of his neck. “Have-have fun with your friends, Jensen. See you tomorrow.”  
  
And before Jensen can at least wish him good night, Jared is disappearing down the hallway and into his room.  
  
  
  


 

—

 

  
  
  
Against Jensen’s predictions, there is no traffic and he’s in and out of a bakery with two boxes full of chocolate cookies in less than ten minutes. One to leave at Tom and Mike’s and one to bring back to Jared.  
  
And all Jensen does on his drive to the bakery and then to his friend’s apartment, is think about the human in question. _Jared_. Jensen swears he had never thought so much and so hard about any living thing in the Universe before. It’s like life is telling him _“you wanted to know more about humans? Well, here it is!”_  
  
He has no idea what happened back there. And it’s kind of getting under Jensen’s skin that he doesn’t know. Shouldn’t he know by now how to understand Jared? They have several time living together and they talk for hours during the day. He should know why Jared is behaving like this and how to make it better, so why doesn’t he?  
  
It’s frustrating to not understand Jared. Like Jensen really should. He knows Jared, doesn’t he?  
  
The idea that Jensen doesn’t understand him that much is somehow not alright for him.  
  
 _Jared is his human after all._  
  
Jensen sighs, waiting at a red light and drumming his fingers on the wheel. He’s being as ridiculous as the night he almost gave himself a cardiac arrest over feeling jealous for the first time—thing that he has been leaving in the back of his head to not analyze it too hard—and Jensen knows it. He knows he’s being stupid about this. Humans are strange, they are different. Jensen is learning that first-hand from living with one.  
  
But it’s more than that, too. It’s one thing to not be an expert on _humans_ in general and not knowing what is happening with _Jared_ in particular.  
  
Why? _Because it’s Jared._  
  
There doesn’t seem to be further explanation than that in Jensen’s head.  
  
He makes it to the apartment complex where his friends moved only weeks ago with ten minutes to spare, so Jensen sits in the car while turning his head around the problem with Jared over and over again, trying to find anything in Jared’s behavior that could indicate what’s going on. All Jensen can place together is that Jared started to act weird after Jensen spoke with Tom and Mike on the phone at the beginning of the week. But Jensen has also spoken with Alona, Danneel and many other shifters from work on the phone before and Jared hasn’t cared much, barely noticing even when Jensen does right in front of him.  
  
Maybe Jared is annoyed because he can’t come along, always locked in the house? Jared doesn’t complain about it but Jensen understands it can’t be easy to be there all the time, unable to do anything else. It’s not a prison, sure, but Jensen gets it. Besides, Jared lost all his friends and family, he doesn’t get the chance to simply do what Jensen is doing right now.  
  
Perhaps Jensen was a little insensitive to Jared’s situation when he accepted his friends’ invitation and kept on talking about it during the week.  
  
Jensen gets out of his car with the box full of cookies at seven o’ clock, taking the elevator to the third floor as he follows the indications Tom mailed him. Apartment 302. The apartment complex seems fairly new, and even the elevator and construction in general reminds Jensen a lot of the kind of things a shifter could design, it doesn’t look at all like the library, where the collision of human and shifter architecture is obvious. No humans lived here before, which somehow makes Jensen feel better about being there.  
  
Mike is the one who opens the door basically five seconds after Jensen rings the bell, like he has been waiting next to the door  all along even when Jensen is right on time. And the first thing he does is pull Jensen into a hug, patting his back and calling for Tom to witness the miracle of Jensen _actually_ coming to hang out with them.  
  
“You are so noisy, I don’t know why I accepted to come in the first place.” Jensen jokes, patting Mike’s back in return, yet feeling a little uncomfortable into the hug. He’s still no good at this kind physical contact with anyone who’s not Jared, even if has known Mike all his life.  
  
“Because you fucking love us. What would you do without us? Die of boredom, probably.”  
  
“Sure, Mike. Whatever lets you sleep at night.” Jensen rolls his eyes, laughing and letting go of his friend, even if Mike keeps a hand on his shoulder.  
  
“I think you should let go, Mike. Jensen is about to have a meltdown over you touching him too long.” Tom says as he walks out of the kitchen, giving Jensen a bright smile.  
  
Jensen and Tom just look at each other with similar smiles, not getting close to hug like Mike did. Jensen met Tom first, and then he met Mike when Tom introduced them. They were only friends back then, but that didn’t last long. Jensen has known Tom for a long time and the reason why they always got along so well is probably because they are so alike in many aspects.  
  
Tom, just like Jensen, is probably just getting used to the customary human interaction by excessive touching and closeness. Jensen wouldn’t be surprised if Tom only does it with Mike. _Jensen gets it._  
  
“Oh, you two awkward geeks. Two beans in a fucking pond.” Mike smirks, winking at Tom before snatching the cookies from Jensen’s hands.  
  
Tom is not a healer like Jensen, but he’s a scientist who has specialized in different fields. Here on earth, he’s studying the different plants and their benefits. Finding medicinal purposes that can be used here as well as in any other planets is one of his specialties, which is usually why Tom and Mike travel through different planets as much as Jensen does.  
  
They sit at the table soon after, and just seeing his friends interact and chatting together reminds Jensen how much he has missed them just as much as it makes him think of Jared being alone at home, unable to do something as simple as hang out with his best friends.  
  
Most of the night goes by with them discussing about Earth and how different it is to live here from all the other planets they have visited before. They all discuss their jobs, getting used to the physical change and all it brings along. Mike seems to be especially fond of Earth and the body they get to morph into while living here. He loves his new body and he’s quite proud of the way he looks as a human, just to add that Tom looks very hot himself, leaning in to press a kiss to Tom’s cheek as Tom nods along.  
  
“I’m telling you, I’m never leaving this planet. This body? I’m keeping it forever.” Mike singsongs as they eat, leaving his right hand open in front of his own face, looking at his palm and nodding in approval. “The nervous system is amazing, and all the things you can do in this form? _Wow_. They should promote that instead, best experience in the damn Universe.”  
  
Tom chokes on his drink for a second, coughing at the same time he laughs, giving Mike amused looks. If Jensen thought different, he would swear Tom is even blushing a little bit. Jensen frowns for a second, feeling like he’s not properly keeping up with the conversation.  
  
“Sure, the human body is remarkable. I was very pleased when I was invited to come study all about it here on earth.”  
  
“Yeah, yeah. The human brain, the chemicals, the emotions. _Yada-yada-yada!”_ Mike shakes one hand in the air, like all is irrelevant. “You know what I’m talking about though. And when we got here the healer who made sure we had morphed correctly barely even mentioned _it_. Like, _'sure guys you can try it if you want.'_ Like he was talking about trying a new juice flavor and not the best thing I have felt in the seven bodies I have had!”  
  
Now Jensen is completely lost. He blinks, chewing slowly before giving Tom a quick glance. Tom can usually explain what Mike means whenever he starts to speak his own language. Tom smirks, raising both eyebrows at Jensen in return. Jensen frown grows.  
  
“For fuck’s sake, Jensen!” Mike cackles, shaking his head. “We’re talking about _sex_. Best thing in this galaxy and beyond!”  
  
Is Jensen’s turn to choke on his food, coughing as takes a sip of his drink, watching Mike cackle and Tom laugh a little bit more discreetly.  
  
“Why you healers don’t say is the best thing ever? We tried it one time and I can barely keep my hands off of Tom ever since.” Mike explains, like it’s nothing, shrugging and winking at Tom, who simply laughs and shakes his head in amusement at Mike’s oversharing tendencies. “If you weren’t here we would probably be doing it right now.”  
  
“ _Mike_.” Tom chuckles, giving him a look, like an indication that saying all that might be too much, even for him. Mike bites his lower lip and shrugs, giving him the most perfectly fake innocent expression in return.  
  
 _Sex_. Yeah, of course. Jensen, as an expert in the human body and all there is to know about the anatomy, understands why sexual arousal and stimulation must be a gratifying experience thanks to all the components that are necessary for it to be possible. A combination only possible in the human body, since many species can reproduce in different ways but not many can call the process “enjoyable”.  
  
“Oh, yeah. Sure.” Jensen shakes his head. “I have read a lot about the hormones present during sexual encounters between humans and why—”  
  
“Wait, wait, _wait_.” Mike interrupts, raising both hands in a “ _stop_ ” sign, mouth hanging open. “You have _read?_ You can’t tell me you haven’t done it yet, Jensen!”  
  
“Mike!” Tom calls again, but he’s still smiling behind his hand.  
  
“What? He’s a healer! He probably does know all the biological process for one to have the best orgasm in the entire cosmos and he _still_ hasn’t done it? Where is your scientific curiosity, man?” Mike seems baffled, absolutely surprised that Jensen hasn’t had sex like a human would. Like it’s the most terrible news he could have received.  
  
“That is none of our business.” Tom points out before giving Jensen a glance, who has stopped eating and is just staring at his friends in silence. “We are already together, but shifters who don’t have a partner might feel different about the matter, Mike.”  
  
“Everyone back in California thought it was so weird we did it.” Mike rolls his eyes. “Said the process seems barbaric and messy, they don’t see the appeal at all and wouldn’t even do it for reproduction purposes. Our neighbors wanted a kid and she got embarrassed in-vitro.”  
  
“And that’s their choice.” Tom adds once more, pointing at Mike with his fork. “Judging isn’t right, Mike. We decided to give it a try and enjoyed it—”  
  
 _“Loved it.”_ Mike interrupts, matter-of-fact.  
  
“True, we loved it. But all other shifters are allowed to not even want to try it. Just like Jensen, it’s their choice.”  
  
Mike agrees, yet he seems disappointed that everybody isn’t humping each other like bunnies because apparently he thinks that there won’t ever be an experience as pleasant as human sex. And just like that, the conversation keeps on flowing, without Jensen ever getting the chance to explain why he hasn’t tried sex at all. He guesses he's grateful Tom interjected to make Mike drop the topic, because Tom understands that just because Mike doesn’t have boundaries doesn’t mean that everyone else is like that. Specially Jensen.  
  
He’s not that surprised that Tom and Mike’s neighbors chose to have in-vitro pregnancies instead, many of Jensen’s patients choose it as well, even if they have the chance to do it by trying the traditional physical way. Human reproduction and sex in general is something shifters encourage others to try if they feel comfortable with it, yet compared to what other species do, human sex is quite… _interesting_ , Jensen could say. He has also had patients describe it as messy and awkward. Something they can only see animals trying on but not someone like them should do. Some even consider it quite violent.  
  
Everyone can have their own opinion, healers just make sure to explain the general process and mention to newly morphed shifters that they are encouraged to try sex if they want to, but of course is not required nor forbidden. Most shifters don’t seem to have any interest in trying sex on Earth, while some—like Jensen’s friends—seem to be _loving_ it.  
  
And Jensen, on his part...well, Jensen hasn’t had the chance nor the interest so far, he guesses. He knows, as an expert on human anatomy, why a sexual experience in the human body could be very pleasing, but he hasn’t been interested on it beyond general knowledge.   
  
He guesses that he hasn’t had sex just for the same reasons he hasn’t tried scuba diving. He hasn’t had the opportunity nor the intention to. Who would he do it with, anyway? It seems very intimate and Jensen can barely feel comfortable with other shifters touching him casually.  
  
Jensen is aware that humans used to do things described as “one night stand” and how the entire concept of having sex was much more casual and simple for them. He sees sex from his shifter perspective, of course, so it doesn’t seem as casual for him. Jared even briefly talked about it when speaking about Stephen, but Jensen would rather not think about Jared being intimate with anyone. The thought doesn’t sit well with him.  
  
He can even feel his stomach turning and hurting as he lets the thought sit in his head for a minute, but he brushes it off as maybe eating too much or too fast during dinner.  
  
As the visit goes by, they keep on changing topics and the specifics about human sex and Jensen never trying it seems to be left behind, yet Jensen doesn’t seem to be able to completely disconnect himself from it. They joke, laugh and have a pretty good time the rest of the night, with Mike finally letting Jensen go when is almost eleven thirty. He makes Jensen promise that they will meet up again soon, saying the next visit could be at Jensen’s house, but Jensen dodges that problem by arguing he’s not as good at entertaining as Mike nor as good as cooking as Tom. So next time will have to be at their apartment again.  
  
They say their goodbyes, with Mike giving Jensen another soul-crushing hug and Tom nodding in his direction while smiling fondly at Jensen, who once again thinks how much he missed his friends as he takes the elevator to the first floor and walks to his car in silence.  
  
When Jensen makes it to his house and pushes the front door open, he’s surprised to find Jared curled on the couch. He seems to be lying in an awkward position, so Jensen guesses Jared fell asleep without meaning to. To his further surprise, Jared didn’t seem to be there watching TV since it's turned off and Jared is sitting on the couch facing the door.  
  
Jared was only waiting for him.  
  
Jensen feels a knot in his throat as he remembers Jared’s question before Jensen left hours earlier. He really did think Jensen wouldn’t come back? The knot in his throat seems to slide down to his chest, starting to burn alive with both affection and guilt.  
  
He approaches the couch, kneeling in front of it before pressing his hand on Jared’s shoulder to shake him gently. Jared wakes up instantly, jumping on his spot and looking confused for good three seconds.  
  
“Jared, hey, it’s me.” Jensen whispers, not wanting to startle him even more, giving him a smile when Jared blinks in his direction. “You fell asleep in the living room.”  
  
Jensen acts by pure instinct then, like he always does whenever he’s around Jared and he starts to feel the way he does now, reaching over and cupping Jared’s face to stroke one of his cheeks gently. Jared yawns, wrinkling his nose. Jensen chuckles, keeping his hand on Jared’s face.  
  
“I was waiting for you to be back.” Jared mumbles, still half-asleep and rubbing one of his eyes with the back of his hand.  
  
“Thank you.” Jensen whispers in return. “I told you I could be back late, I’m sorry you had to wait so long you fell asleep.”  
  
“I just thought—” Jared squeezes his eyes shut for a moment, still trying to wake himself up and make some sense. Jensen wonders for a second if Jared will move way once he realizes Jensen is touching him, but all Jared does is lean into Jensen’s touch. Jensen lets his fingers travel over Jared’s soft skin, fingertips digging into the curve of his right dimple. “It’s stupid.”  
  
“No, it’s not.” Moving even closer to the couch, Jensen tries to make Jared look at him. He wants to know what’s going on with Jared, he wants to be able to understand him. And not because Jared is a human, but simply because is Jared. Jensen wants to be able to get so close to him that he understand every single thing about the boy sitting in front of him. “You can tell me, Jared. _Please_.”  
  
“Maybe you’ll get bored of me. Or realize I’m not that much compared to your shifter friends.” Jared shrugs and Jensen can feel Jared’s cheek heating up against his palm. It makes that something in his chest burn even stronger than before.  
  
It makes Jensen wish he could do something more than just hold Jared’s face and stroke his cheeks.  
  
“You have to be with me here all the time and I’m just a human. Maybe you’ll want to be with your friends even more now and that’s fine, but I—” Jared sighs, looking down, debating if he should keep on going and Jensen so hopes that he does. “I wish I could make you want to stay here with me. Because I really like being here with you.”  
  
Once again, Jensen acts before thinking, moving his other hand up to completely cup Jared’s face, making him tilt his head up so he will stare into Jensen’s eyes. Because Jensen needs Jared to look at him, so he’ll know Jensen is telling the truth. He moves his eyes down the curve of Jared’s nose and then looks at the beauty mark next to Jared’s eye, thumb moving up to stroke over it before squeezing Jared’s face a little.  
  
Because he needs Jared to _understand_. How every single thing Jensen is about to say is exactly how he feels.  
  
“Jared. I have traveled to different planets and been to countless galaxies. I have seen all there is to see out there, and yet, there’s nothing else I would rather do in the entire Universe than be here with you.”  
  
Jared's eyes light up at his answer, and just for a second, Jensen wishes he and Jared weren’t so different from Tom and Mike.

 

 

 

—

 

 

 

  
There are two things Jensen can assure after his visit to Tom and Mike's place. One, he can’t get their annoying sex talk out of his head and two, he has something going on with Jared. _He_. Jensen does. And it’s something different, something he hasn’t caught on before. It started with Jensen being worried about the human, to later on care more and more about him and finally consider him his friend.  
  
But it looks like it hasn't stopped there, because just some nights ago Jensen thought about leaning in and kissing Jared after he found him waiting for him in his living room.  
  
Him. _Jensen_. Thought about kissing Jared. A _human_. When Jensen is a _shifter_.  
  
And is not like Jensen has a problem with Jared being a human, inter-species relations are well known around shifter society, even if shifters usually pick their life partners among their own for different reasons. But the cases exist, Jensen has seen them. So that’s not the problem. What starts making a mess here is that Jensen is a shifter.  
  
He’s the problem. He’s the alien who landed on Earth and took everything from Jared’s life. Jared has learned to trust him and now they are close but there is a huge gap between Jared being friendly with Jensen and not caring if Jensen tries to kiss him.  
  
Jared’s a human. He’s used to human relationships, feelings between and for humans. Jared doesn’t see things the way Jensen does, he’s—he’s so much younger than Jensen, he’s in there living with him because he’s hiding of other shifters like Jensen. Jared might be attracted to males and sure Jensen is a male too, but Jared was talking about human males. _Like Stephen._  
  
Jared has to hide away to survive, these aren’t some vacations for him and Jensen couldn’t possibly burden him with something that not even he can begin to understand.  
  
Jensen has never felt like this, he can barely make sense out of whatever is going on with him. And he could blame the human body and the emotions it brings along but he would also know it's all bullshit. It’s _Jensen_. The way he feels whenever he’s around Jared. It’s all him, coming from deep inside from his shifter cores and has nothing to do with how he looks on the outside.  
  
He would have a hard time dealing with this level of attraction if it was anyone else considering Jensen has never felt anything so strong, but the fact that is a _human_ and is _Jared_ just makes it so much more complicated.  
  
And then, to make his head even a bigger mess than it already is—thanks to all the things that he feels whenever he’s around Jared and the explicit talk he had with his friends last week—Jensen walks into the bathroom when Jared is using it.  
  
It could have been taking a shower or washing his teeth, Jensen thinks any other option could have been better than _this_ type of _using it._  
  
To put it the most human term Jensen’s knows: he basically walks into Jared _jerking off_ in the bathroom.  
  
It happens the only Friday he has been back from work earlier than usual and apparently it was a big mistake. That and not knocking the door before walking in the bathroom. He thought Jared was in his room.  
  
Jared curses at him with all the words Jensen knows and also doesn't understand yet, face shining in bright red before he throws at Jensen all the bath products he has around before closing the door in Jensen’s face, telling him to _stay the fuck away_.  
  
And then, Jared proceeds to lock himself in the bathroom for at least two hours.  
  
Jensen tries to speak to him through the door, but that seems to only make it worse. He hears Jared throwing him more bath products, not caring they will hit the door instead of Jensen, telling him once again to _fuck off_ or Jared's going to give him a real reason to want to leave.  
  
At one moment, when Jensen finally gives up and goes busy himself in the kitchen, he hears Jared running from the bathroom in Jensen’s room to his own room, already gone by the time Jensen turns his head around. Jared locks himself in his own room next and tells Jensen he’s not having anything for dinner that night, once again refusing to come out and talk to Jensen any further.  
  
Jensen doesn’t see an inch of Jared for almost twenty-four hours, finally giving up and coming out of his room to have dinner the next day, probably surrendering after going so long without eating anything at all. Jensen is glad, he was starting to get worried.  
  
Yet all Jared does is sit in silence at the table, not daring to make eye contact with Jensen as he eats in silence, hiding behind his long hair and looking like he wants to run back into his room. Jensen understands why Jared might feel embarrassed, for all he has read, what Jensen saw it’s rather a private act for humans and he was clearly not meant to see it happen.  
  
Jensen didn’t even see that much anyway. He turned his face away as soon as he noticed Jared— _well_ , that Jared didn’t have his pants or underwear on. Jensen isn’t some pervert, he wouldn’t ogle or look at Jared without his permission.  
  
“Jared.” Jensen starts after twenty minutes of silence, and Jared groans immediately, moving his head down so more of his hair will cover his face. “Listen to me, please. You don’t have to feel embarrassed. Masturbation is completely normal and extremely common among humans, and it’s a healthy way to deal with stress and—”  
  
“Oh, no!” Jared yells, snapping his face up, letting Jensen see how red his face is at the moment. Even Jared’s nose and ears are bright at this point. “Don’t you dare make it all— _medical_ and stuff. Don’t make it into your healer lessons, that’s even worst!”  
  
“How so?” Jensen blinks, confused.  
  
“B-Because—it’s weird! Is like you’re giving _the talk_ or something. I-I know jerking off is normal and all that, spare me the fucking anatomy class for pre-teens.” Jared huffs, and he looks utterly mortified, hands shaking as he grabs the fork to keep on eating, so Jensen decides to shut up.  
                              
Apparently talking about the benefits of masturbation is not the way to go here. Noted.  
  
“Alright.” Jensen nods. “I just wanted to let you know there’s no reason to feel embarrassed, you were just doing something natur—” but Jared shoots him a look to shuts Jensen up before he can insist how natural it is for humans to want to relief some of their sexual tension with masturbation. “Fine. I’ll shut up.”  
  
“Thanks.” Jared groans, avoiding Jensen’s eyes. “And of course I feel embarrassed, are you insane? I wanted to die after you walked in the bathroom! Even _you_ should get that. P-People isn't supposed to see you— _you know._ Everybody knows it happens but nobody talks about it _or_ gets an eyeful of someone else doing it.” Jared huffs again, brushing his hair nervously.  
  
“I didn’t get an eyeful.” Jensen comments after a moment, only to get another deadly glare for Jared, so he nods and shuts up again.  
  
They go without talking or looking at each other—or at least Jared doesn’t look at Jensen at all—for another twenty minutes before Jared speaks again.  
  
“I didn’t know you would be coming home early a-and I—” Jared shrugs, nibbling on his lower lip. “I just…well, you know how it is. Heat of the moment, whatever. You don’t think someone might walk in and—yeah, _anyway_. You get it, you know what I mean.”  
  
Jensen raises both eyebrows in response, watching Jared play with the rest of the food in his plate.  
  
“Actually, I don’t know.”  
  
That seems to get past Jared’s embarrassment, who finally looks back up and stops hiding behind his bangs. He looks confused for a second, just before squinting at Jensen suspiciously.  
  
“What?”  
  
“I don’t know what you mean, at all. I have never experienced or dealt with anything you just explained.” Jensen repeats, shrugging again. “But I suppose I can understand why you would feel embarrassed if you say it’s something intimate. And I walked in and I’m sorry for—”  
  
“No, no. Wait a second.” Jared raises one of his hands, doing the exact “stop” gesture Mike did the night Jensen had dinner with them. “What do you mean you have never experienced what I just said?”  
  
Jensen frowns, thinking is weird Jared is not understanding what he’s saying.  
  
“It means what it’s supposed to mean. I have never done it before, so I—“  
  
“What!” Jared squeaks, widening his eyes and letting his mouth hang open as he looks at Jensen like is the first time they meet. “Wait. _No_. You have never…” He trails off, just before he makes a hand movement in the air, moving his fist up and down in a jerking motion. Jensen tilts his head in confusion and Jared groans life before, but this time he lets out a little nervous laugh. “You silly alien. Jerking off! That’s what _this_ means.” And then he does the jerking motion with his fist in the air again. “You have _never_ done it? No way!”  
  
“No. I really haven’t. It didn’t seem that appealing and kind of awkward when I read about it.” He can understand sex and how it involved somebody else, but doing it yourself, alone...well it didn’t sound that much fun. And while Jensen did know all the steps for it and why it was a healthy and normal activity, it really did seem like a weird concept.  
  
“Shut the fuck up!” Jared giggles again, mouth still hanging open. “Not appealing? Dude. You shift into humans and you all don’t try the only good thing our bodies have to offer? Shame on you, Jensen.” Jared snickers this time, and it seems like his embarrassment is magically drifting away.  
  
Like talking about Jensen never masturbating before is the cure for Jared feeling bad after getting caught doing it.  
  
Jensen rolls his eyes, crossing his arms. “Give it a rest, is not even that much of a big deal.”  
  
“You say that because you have never tried it! And you’re a _guy_. Dude, is so much easier for us to get off than for girls!” Jared smacks his forehead, like he still finds so mind-blowing the whole conversation. “But, alright, being serious. You _do_ know that orgasms feel like really good food tastes, right?”  
  
If he’s honest, Jensen is the one who doesn’t understand why Jared is so surprised he has never tried it. Sure, it sounds like a nice experience but, again. Kind of awkward, too.  
  
“I have read that the combination and flow of hormones and neurotransmitters present during the entire sexual response cycle along with the stimulation from visual, physical and mental sources can cause a positive and pleasant response in the human body.” Jensen quotes perfectly from one of the best anatomy books he has read. “But, even so, the process didn’t see that appealing.”  
  
Jared nods along Jensen’s entire explanation, yet somehow Jensen thinks his serious expression is nothing but condescending. _Smartass_. Now Jensen knows the word to indicate what Jared is doing.  
  
By the time Jensen's done explaining, Jared has a small little smirk and doesn’t seem to be embarrassed anymore.  
  
“Okay, sure, you may have your reasons to not do it. But…” Jared gets up, taking his almost empty plate and walking towards the kitchen, only stopping once he’s by Jensen’s side. “As a guy and a fellow human who had to keep his sexual orientation secret and therefore had a lot of time alone, I’m an expert on this subject. And as an expert, I say you _have_ to give it a try at least once, Ackles.”  
  
He taps Jensen’s shoulder twice and then winks at him before walking towards the kitchen, snickering the whole time he stays in there washing his dishes.  
  
They don’t talk any more that night, with Jared just whispering about going to sleep to give Jensen his _“private time”_ , letting out another chuckle before prancing to him room. Jared really does think this is _hilarious_. Jensen, on his part, stays on the table to eat the rest of his dinner in silence.  
  
And the entire time Jensen eats, washes the dishes, organizes the kitchen and then proceeds to take a shower, he does nothing but think about the same thing over and over again. He’s used to have nothing but Jared in his head by this point. But this is _different_. The taps on his shoulder, the winking, the giggles. And of course, how insistent Jared was about Jensen giving masturbation a try.  
  
What is it with everybody and sex all of sudden? First Mike and all his details and comparisons. Best experience in the entire Universe and so on. Even Tom seemed to agree, and then Jared—well, Jared straight up told Jensen he had to do it.  
  
He huffs as he steps out of the shower, a little annoyed with everybody and even with himself. Since when experiencing one kind of pleasure and relief had become so important? Jensen knows the chemistry behind it, and sure, it could potentially be a nice experience, but so could be going swimming with dolphins. And Jensen isn't rushing to take a plane to go do that, right?  
  
What is the big deal with the human body and sexual relief?  
  
For some reason it’s really starting to rub Jensen wrong.  
  
Yeah, he hasn’t done it before. So what? The entire process of jerking off—as Jared said—looked really uncomfortable. Jensen can understand shifters who chose to reproduce in-vitro to avoid the most common and physical method. It sounds like nothing Jensen has seen or heard about before, and he's almost positive Mike and Tom were exaggerating. Maybe Jared doesn't know any better, but his friends? They have been to as many galaxies and planets as Jensen. They can’t honestly think that human sex is better than _anything_ else out there.  
  
“Bullshit.” Jensen whispers,  mad for a reason he’s not sure he can understand. He has been thinking about the whole thing since the night he spent with his friends, but now that Jared has brought it up too, it’s worse than before.  
  
Jensen can’t point which part is the one irritating him the most. The fact that everyone keeps insisting Jensen is weird for not trying masturbation this far—which many shifters also refuse to do, mind you—or how he suddenly feels an even bigger gap between him and Jared because of something as simple as this. _Sex_. Another thing that makes them different.  
  
Now is not only the fact that Jared is a human, that he’s used to human relationships and attraction between humans. Jensen can add something more to the bingo card of why the feelings he experiences around Jared are nothing but a mess.  
  
Sex. Even that is different for them. Jared is used to human sex, of course. He’s used to the human way of relieving sexual tension and desires and Jensen—well, Jensen doesn’t even know what jerking off feels like.  
  
He lets himself fall back on the bed with a huff, lying on the covers with only his underwear on, feeling his hair starting to soak the pillow under his head.  
  
Being so different from Jared stops feeling fascinating at points only to become frustrating. Jensen understands it’s impossible for them to be the same, they are different species, they have different backgrounds and their lives couldn’t be more opposite. But he also wishes they could be alike in some things at least.  
  
Jensen stares at the ceiling, trying once again to deal with an anger and frustration he’s barely getting used to. _Whatever_. He bets Mike, Tom and even Jared are full of it. There’s no way a simple release of hormones can feel that good. It's not that big of a deal and it's just proving once more how different Jared and Jensen are and he honestly hates it.  
  
Fine, then. There’s a simple way to prove them wrong and make that gap at least a little bit smaller.  
  
Closing his eyes for a second and feeling kind of stupid about what he’s about to do, Jensen loops his thumbs on the elastic band of his boxers, pulling them down until they are around his knees. Jensen makes a face, still staring at the ceiling and feeling strange just lying there on his bed basically naked. Humans think this is the best? Was Jared serious about it?  
  
Jensen vaguely remembers reading about not being recommendable to just do this dry. He sighs, still irritated, bringing his hand up to lick his palm. Jensen’s not sure how wet it’s supposed to be, so he simply keeps on licking until the entire surface of his hand feels sticky and soaked.  
  
Sighing once more, Jensen takes a look at his right hand—shiny with spit—thinking how this is normal for Jared. For all humans. Men and women did this and they probably didn’t have as many doubts about it like Jensen. But of course Jensen does, because he’s different. Because he’s not like Jared, who maybe even did this with _Stephen_.  
  
That’s the last little push Jensen needs before closing his eyes again and simply thinking _“Fuck it”,_ lowering his arm and wrapping his palm around his dick.  
  
And, here’s the thing: Jensen knows the process he’s supposed to follow. He knows the science behind it. He has read about it, studied it, knows by memory how his body is supposed to react as he slowly moves his hand down all the way to the base of his dick, squeezing just so before bringing it back to stroke the head. It’s uncomfortable after never doing this before, and Jensen guesses the light tingles he start to feel in the base of his stomach could be a good start, but after some strokes it doesn’t feel like anything that special.  
  
Probably the same nice sensation he could get from rubbing his hands when is cold or a massage on his neck when he's stressed. Is not that much. Jensen moves on the bed, palm still around his dick as he lets his hand slide up and down as his mind concentrates on the biology book he read months ago and had a whole chapter on the physical reactions humans felt during sexual arousal and relief. Jensen can probably quote entire paragraphs word by word, he thinks, hand still pumping up and down awkwardly.  
  
He knows by memory that sexual arousal and orgasms are the results of environmental and psychological stimuli coupled with neurochemical mechanisms. Jensen can also name all the neurotransmitters and hormones present during sexual excitement, orgasm and post-orgasm. Dopamine. Prolactin. Oxytocin. Serotonin. Norepinephrine. The last one being the indicated to constrict and dilate blood vessel in the genitals during sexual stimulation, which would make them more sensitive to touch.  
  
Which should be happening right now. Norepinephrine should be synthesized and released by the central nervous system and it should be increasing his arousal.  
  
Biologically and theoretically speaking, it should all be happening right now, but in practice, Jensen is feeling nothing but small amounts of a nice sensation every now and then. Which really can’t be compared to how awkward he feels. The comparison could easily be one point for arousal and ten points for feeling uncomfortable.  
  
Jensen bites the inside of his cheeks, frustrated at yet another prove that he can’t do something so basic that any human would be able to. Because he's _different_.  
  
Tom and Mike were exaggerating.  
  
And Jared was wrong. This doesn’t feel that incredible.  
  
Then, for a quick second, Jensen feels it. The sudden pleasant sensation exploding at the soft contact of his hand sliding down his cock as his brain provides him the image of Jared talking to him during dinner. Is just a moment that starts and ends before Jensen even realizes it, but the clear image if Jared’s face is enough to make his dick twitch in his hand, getting a loud pant out of him.  
  
He stops immediately, opening his eyes and feeling his face heat up just so.  
  
A new part of the book Jensen has been quoting in his head seems to come back to him in that second, making him remember details about masturbation being not only physical but also mental. The book used the words _fantasy_ and _visuals_.  
  
Swallowing loudly, Jensen gives it a second try, sliding his fingers all the way to the base of his dick as he thinks about Jared blushing during dinner, looking down to try to hide his eyes behind his long bangs.  
  
The response is immediate and unbelievable. It feels so good is stupid, the sudden rush of arousal making Jensen stop again, warm sensation staying at the base of his belly.  
  
Is it even okay to think about Jared while he’s doing this? It didn’t seem to feel that good until the image of Jared popped in his head. His body needs the psychological stimuli, it seems like only the physical part is not going to be enough.  
  
Jensen can’t help but wonder if that’s a shifter thing or just him: needing the emotional connection to be able to enjoy it.  
  
Maybe he’s the only one who needs to think about the human sleeping in the room across from his to feel sexually aroused.  
  
Jensen can feel his heart bumping hard, guilt starting to creep on the back of his neck, but his curiosity for the anatomy he has been fascinated to study is too big now that he has started to experience what Mike and Jared were talking about.  
  
So he gives it another try, moving his hand from the base to the head of his dick, making sure close his eyes and think of the feeling he experienced the first time he hugged Jared. Jensen groans heavily, dick hardening in his hand and making the touch even more pleasant. This is wrong, this is so wrong. Screwed up. _Fucked up._  
  
Jensen shouldn’t be imagining Jared as he jerks off. Yet the more he does, the better it feels.  
  
If he had to compare it to something, it could maybe be to finally being able to drink something after your mouth and throat are dry all day long. Or perhaps starting to scratch your arm after it’s been itching for a long time, not being able to stop and instead wanting to scratch more and harder as the sensation grows.  
  
Within minutes Jensen has already kicked off his underwear, spreading his legs even more on the bed to get into a more comfortable position, jerking himself off steadily by this point. He starts realizing what feels better after some minutes, running his thumb around the head of his dick, smearing the pre-come over the slit. He would rather do it slow, stopping at moments to let his body enjoy the waves of pleasure, feeling something he can’t begin to describe build up inside of him.  
  
He can feel the tip of his toes tingling as well as the inside of his thighs as he slides his hand down to hold his sack and rub the base of his balls. All while keeping Jared in his head.  
  
The perfect image of Jared’s face. Jared’s voice. Jared’s smile. Jared’s laugh. It all pays in Jensen’s head like a movie as he raises his hips to meet with his closed hand, almost by mere instinct, starting to moan between pants.  
  
And the sensation keeps on growing, building inside of him and all Jensen wants to do is take it to the top, stretch that feeling to every part of his body and keep on making it grow until it explodes.  
  
A simple glance down at himself lets him see that his dick is rock hard by this point, head turning red and a little swollen as Jensen rubs the new drops of pre-come over the slit.  
  
Jensen has the sudden idea of that being Jared’s hand around his dick instead his own. Is just a second, a flash in his head of Jared lying in bed with him like they have done so many times when they have watched movies together, one of Jared's hands around Jensen’s cock, slowly getting him off.  
  
Jensen moans harder than before, bringing his left hand up immediately to cover his mouth, biting onto his palm.  
  
He stops for only a moment, holding his breath and trying to hear any noise outside, hoping he didn’t wake up Jared just now.  
  
Letting go of his hard-on and feeling it slap back against his belly feels like pure torture, dick aching for more contact. But Jensen has to make sure.  
  
After a whole minute, that is probably the longest minute of Jensen’s life, he decides to wrap his right hand around his cock once again, giving a slow pump as he imagines it's Jared’s hand instead, eyelashes fluttering as he bites once more onto his left hand. Jensen wonders how Jared’s hand would feel like, if it would be softer than Jensen’s and maybe warmer. If he would know exactly how to get Jensen off, if he would be able to make it feel even better.  
  
Which would be ridiculous if it was possible, because Jensen is feeling pretty fucking fantastic right about now. He licks his lips, moving his left hand away to leave it over the bed again. There’s no way to describe how incredibly pleasant it is, the flashes of arousal and want, want, _want_ that pump through his veins as he jerks himself off and does nothing but think Jared, Jared, _Jared_.  
  
There’s not a single trace of the phrases from his texts books in his head anymore, Jensen couldn’t remember a word from them even if his life depended on it. All he can think about is increasing the pleasant sensation, making them grow, keeping Jared in his mind as Jensen wonders if this is how his human felt the day before when Jensen walked in the bathroom.  
  
Jensen didn’t lie before, he didn’t get an eyeful of Jared in that moment and he did look in another direction when he realized that Jared was semi-naked. But there’s one thing Jensen’s brain decided to keep, the image he got before turning away. And now, with his hand around his dick and Jared’s name on his lips, Jensen can remember it.  
  
Jared sitting on the toiled, head thrown back and lips open in the middle of a moan. Jensen can remember his pleased expression almost perfectly. He can see it behind his eyelids, the way Jared’s cheeks were bright pink and how he looked just as pleased as Jensen feels.  
  
That something inside of Jensen that has been building up all this time seems to suddenly raise and expand in the blink of an eye, growing so much and feeling so good that for a second Jensen is sure he’s going to die because it. There’s no way his body can handle so much pleasure, it feels too good to be real.  
  
It’s too hot to think about Jared getting off while Jensen fucks into his closed fist.  
  
Jensen grips the blankets under him with his left hand, letting out a loud groan that is a clear mix of a moan and Jared’s name, and then everything goes white for a second.  
  
He can’t feel, think or exist beyond the waves of pleasure that explode all over his body, mental image of Jared’s face engraved in the inside of his eyelids.  
  
The relaxing sensation that comes right after the orgasm is just as enjoyable, leaving Jensen in a blissed state as he tries to recover his breath, looking down at himself as he moves his hand away from his dick, fingers and stomach now covered in a sticky fluid. _Come_. A little voice in Jensen’s head provides the explanation that he just ejaculated and now he’s experiencing the post-orgasm hormones, but he really can’t bring himself to give a crap about the science behind what he just did.  
  
 _Holy shit_. Holy fucking shit. Well, clearly Jensen was wrong when he said they were all full of it. Because that was—yeah. _Wow_. Jared wasn’t kidding when he said it was the best thing the human body had to offer.  
  
Jensen lets out a deep breath, still trying to make any sense of the mess that is his head, blissed out and beyond pleased. He decides to just clean his hand and himself with his own blankets, not feeling like getting up to go to the bathroom. Actually, all Jensen wants to do right now is roll in bed and go to sleep.  
  
Yet as soon as he closes his eyes, Jared’s image comes back swinging.  
  
Jensen takes a sharp breath, starting to realize what has just happened. Now he doesn’t only feel really intense emotions whenever he’s around Jared. Jensen has officially realized he’s also sexually attracted to his human too. He likes Jared in every single possible way there is. He likes him more than he has liked anyone in the entire Universe. What Jensen just did snapped a new paer of him, waking something in his body he has never experimented before.  
  
Jensen _wants_ in a physical way. He wants _Jared_.  
  
Letting out a sigh as he presses his face into one of his pillows, Jensen knowa that there’s no going back from this now.  
  
He’s utterly and completely fucked.

 


	13. Chapter 13

  
—Part Thirteen—  
(Jensen)  
  
  


 

It’s been months since Jared broke into Jensen’s house and now it's almost weird to think about a time on earth without Jared being right there. They have fallen into a comfortable relationship that Jensen enjoys even if he wishes they could be more than unlikely-friend. But it doesn’t matter. Jared is right there with him. That’s the important part.  
  
Of course things have changed since that rainy night Jared was being chased by a group of Collectors. Jensen thinks he has changed more than Jared himself, who simply ended trusting him and feeling at home right there at Jensen’s house.  
  
But Jensen is the one who has really changed.  
  
He has what all shifters fears. Jensen has now experienced most of the bad emotions they basically consider a deadly virus. Jensen has felt them, and not only that, he's kind of embracing them. Being here, with Jared, has taught Jensen that perhaps being afraid of what you don’t know and simply decide to avoid every aspect of it might not be the best way to deal with things.  
  
Shifters were scared of humans because of his violent records, so they locked them up in Facilities. Shifters were worried about the content of certain books and movies, so they banned them and took them away. Shifters are terrified of ever experiencing all the emotions and feelings they have considered bad since the beginning of times, so they keep them at bay and try to control them once they morph into human bodies.  
  
But who said that was the right way to do it? Jensen has started to understand that just because shifters say it's bad doesn’t mean it is. Experiencing certain emotions doesn’t make you bad. Perhaps shifters have been missing out all along by not letting themselves experience more than the happy bubble they have known all along.  
  
After all, how can you know light exist without the dark? You can’t have goodness without the bad counterpart. And sure, murders, hatred and some of the things humans did were not okay.  
  
But a movie is just a movie. An emotion is just an emotion.  
  
Jensen has stopped seeing things in white and black thanks to Jared. He can see the Universe in grayscale now.  
  
He can’t say any of that out loud, of course, he could end getting himself sent to another planet if he ever expressed how he feels. Jensen still has to pretend he thinks the same way he did months ago whenever Danneel comes around to check on him—and whenever she does, Jared has to hide in Jensen’s bathroom and he, of course, loathes it—to not get in any kind of trouble.  
  
There’s no way he’s leaving Earth now. Not after Jared.  
  
Jensen’s staying for Jared. With Jared.  
  
Because, of course, the feelings Jensen has been experiencing around Jared have done nothing but keep on growing like there’s no tomorrow. He swears that every time he wakes up to see Jared’s smiling face his heart feels like is going to expand so big in his chest that it will rip his body apart. The tingles on his skin whenever Jared touches him seem to keep increasing with every time it happens. And of course, Jensen hasn’t been able to stop jerking off almost every night thinking about Jared. Is like his body can’t get enough now that he got a taste. Jensen has discovered that there’s nothing quite as pleasing as thinking about Jared in the mornings while he’s in the shower or before he goes to sleep at nights.  
  
Mike was right all along. _Best thing in this galaxy and beyond._  
  
Jensen has morphed his body into many forms, but he never felt anything like this.  
  
And of course he also never felt like he does when he's around Jared. It doesn’t even matter what they do every new day, whatever it is, Jensen just sits and enjoys Jared’s presence, watching him talk and laugh. Sometimes Jensen stops to wonder how is possible that Jared doesn’t see it, the way Jensen looks at him, how his entire life seems to spin around Jared like the Earth orbits around the sun.  
  
But it doesn’t matter if Jared doesn’t notice at all, Jensen has decided that acting on emotions he can’t begin to explain even to himself would be beyond stupid. Jared needs a place to feel safe and someone he can trust after losing everything else. Jensen isn’t about to throw that away just to make Jared feel uncomfortable by living with someone who has weird inter-species feelings for him.  
  
So Jensen doesn’t mind. He thinks he can live like this for as long as he has to if it means he can have Jared right there.  
  
“So, uh—remember when I explained about birthdays the other day?” Jared asks from across the kitchen, working on the pancake mix.  
  
“Yes, and I think I got a pretty good grip of how humans used to celebrate them.” Jensen nods, taking a sip of his orange juice as he lets Jared work alone after he kept insisting he wanted to do all the cooking that morning. Shifters don’t have such a thing as a celebration of the day you’re born, probably because every time they morph bodies could be considered a new date to celebrate, and it would get complicated to do keep track of all the dates. “Yours is next week, right?”  
  
Jared perks up immediately, turning his head and giving Jensen a little smile that makes Jensen feel pretty damn good about himself.  
  
“How do you know that?”  
  
Jensen shrugs, trying to not make it sound like a big deal, yet he’s fighting the smugness he's feeling at how happy Jared seems to be over Jensen knowing that detail. Lately, making Jared happy in any way has become one of Jensen’s favorite activities.  
  
“You mentioned it months ago when you were telling me about all the books your dad would usually get you as presents.” Which later impulsed Jensen to steal the banned books from the library.  
  
“You…remembered?” Jared’s smile grows bigger and Jensen nods in return, leaving the glass over the counter and crossing his arms.  
  
“Of course. So, do you have anything in mind you want to do that day? I already got the cake part pretty clear, but it seems like the activities for the day are always relative to what the human in question wants to do.”  
  
Jared had given him different examples of the activities he would do on each birthday. Apparently, birthdays for kids were a bigger deal and therefore they had bigger parties, but adults kept on celebrating too. Jensen is not exactly clear on some parts but he understands the point of the celebration and little details like the cake, blowing candles—that are apparently a representation of how old you’re becoming, again, _weird_ —and getting presents after eating the cake.  
  
“Yes, that’s true. The person who is celebrating usually chooses the activities for the day…” Jared trails off, leaving the bowl with the pancake mix over the counter, starting to play with it absently. There is music playing in the background from one of the only radio stations Jared seems to enjoy since they still play some human music. “Like the food you eat that day and the flavor of the cake. And you usually give out hints weeks earlier of what you want as a present.”  
  
Jensen frowns for a second, making a face. _Oh, shit_. Had Jared been giving him hints of what he wanted and Jensen didn’t get it? Typical. He had proven before he is the worst with human traditions.  
  
“You—told me what you wanted already?” Jensen wants to hit himself in the face. The first birthday Jared is spending with him and Jensen is already fucking it up.  
  
“What? Oh, no!” Jared laughs, and the sound makes Jensen relax almost instantly. “I actually haven’t sent you any hints. That was just an example.”  
  
Jensen sighs in relief, leaning against the counter. Well, at least he still has the chance to actually make Jared’s birthday an enjoyable experience. He’s sure it won’t be easy without his friends and family being there this time around, for what Jensen understands it’s the kind of day you want to spend with people who are special to you. Jensen wants to make it special so Jared won’t feel sad on _his_ day.  
  
“But…I actually wanted to talk to you about that today.” Jared adds a moment later, starting to play with his hands nervously.  
  
“Is that why you were so insisting on making me breakfast?" Jensen arches and eyebrow, shaking his head. “And here I thought you were just being nice.”  
  
“Shut up, I’m always nice.” Jared rolls his eyes, giving Jensen the finger and trying to chuckle, but Jensen can easily tell Jared is really nervous about this.  
  
“Alright, tell me what you want then. I promise I’ll do my best to get it for you.”  
  
“Okay…” Jared takes a deep breath and then lifts his chin, trying to look confident as he makes eye contact with Jensen. “For my birthday, I want to go outside.”  
  
“ _What?”_  
  
Jared flinches at Jensen’s immediate answer but that doesn’t seem to completely discourage him, taking a deep gulp of air and looking straight at Jensen again. In the meantime, Jensen says nothing, Jared's words repeating inside of his head over and over again.  
  
“I want to go outside. I was wondering if we could go…I don’t, anywhere you want.” Jared shrugs, like the details don’t matter. He keeps on rubbing his hands, starting to get anxious at Jensen’s lack of response. “It doesn’t matter. I just want to go somewhere. You see, sometimes for my birthdays I would take a road trip with my family or with Chad. Like a tradition. And I miss it.”  
  
 _Outside_. Jared wants to leave the house. And not in the leaving sense that would make Jensen’s chest hurt. No, it’s a different kind of _leave_ , because he wants Jensen to go along with him. Outside of the house, where anybody could see him. _Outside_ , where thousands of shifter eyes could pick something strange in Jared’s behavior. A simple answer, how he speaks, a small detail Jared wouldn’t even realize is giving him away. And something that small could end in Jared being taken away. The Collectors would appear before Jared even has the time to run or for Jensen to bring him back home. One second and Jared’s gone. A human in a sea of shifters who fear everything Jared is and would never understand that he’s not what they think.  
  
Jared going out is basically a direct sentence for a Facility.  
  
“A-And I was thinking that I’m with you, we could just figure something out. You can tell me what to do and I—”  
  
“No.”  
  
At Jensen’s reply, Jared stops speaking for a second, resolution weakening for a heartbeat.  
  
“N-No? You think we could do fine without you giving me indications on what to do?”  
  
“No, as in, _we’re not going out_. You’re not going out.” Jensen explains, raising his voice a little bit. “Jared. _No_. That’s too dangerous, anyone would be able to tell you’re a human in a heartbeat. I realized the second I saw you for the first time!”  
  
“That’s different!” Jared argues immediately. “I had a gun with me! Now I get why that would give away a human in a second. But I have spent all this time with you, I have seen the way you behave, so I think I can—”  
  
“No, Jared! There’s no way you can go out there without someone realizing you’re a human.”  
  
“B-But, Jensen. Come on. Is not that I don’t like our place, I do, but my birthday…” Jared trails off, voice breaking a little bit. “This was my thing, you know? I would wait all year for my birthday road trip. I loved that tradition. Jensen, _please_.”  
  
It’s harder than Jared will ever imagine, to look at him in the eye when he’s pleading that way and say “no”. Jensen never wants to be the one to get in Jared’s happiness, sometimes Jensen thinks is a miracle Jared can be happy at all after all the things he had to deal with so far. Humans are braver than shifters could ever be, anyone from Jensen’s species who lived and lose all Jared has would completely destroy them.  
  
Jensen understands where Jared is coming from, he really does, but it’s just too much of a risk.  
  
“Jared, listen, I’m really sorry. We can do anything else you want—”  
  
“That’s what I want, though!” Jared keeps on insisting, his expression so discouraged now it makes Jensen hate himself immediately. But this is for Jared’s own good, he has done all he can do for the boy so far, but this time he can’t give up. “Jensen, this is all I want for my birthday. I just want to be able to feel normal for a day, I want to go out and go grocery shopping, go get a pizza, anything! It doesn’t matter. Anything that resembles just a little bit of what I could do back then.”  
  
Jensen sighs, rubbing his forehead with one hand and shaking his head as he listens to Jared speak.  
  
“Jared, listen— _Jared!”_ Jensen calls when he won’t stop speaking and explaining why he wants to go out so badly at least the day of his birthday. “ _No_. It’s too dangerous, don’t you see that? Any shifter who notices any weird behavior could call the Security Division.”  
  
“It’s just going to be one day though, one day. It doesn’t even have to be all day.” Jared keeps on pleading, voice breaking every now and then. “It doesn’t even have to be all day, just-just a couple hours and we will be back. Jensen, come on, please. I’m begging you.”  
  
“No. Absolutely not. No matter where we go, shifters would be there.”  
  
“Please, Jensen. Please, it will be fine, we can go anywhere you choose. Jensen, _please_ —”  
  
“ _JARED!_ I said _no!”_  
  
It must be the first time Jensen has ever yelled at him and it makes Jared stop talking immediately, giving Jensen a sad look in return. Jensen bites on his tongue, still shaking his head and keeping his ground, decided to not risk Jared’s life, even if it means he will probably ruin the birthday that Jensen was hoping Jared could enjoy. But not like this. Not if it can get Jared dragged into a Facility and connected down to a machine that won’t let him ever wake up again.  
  
“You don’t get it.” Jared whispers and it’s so low Jensen actually has to step close to hear him. “Jensen, I _need_ this. You might not get it because you guys don’t even celebrate this kind of thing, you must think is just another stupid human behavior.”  
  
“Is not that at all, Jared, come on.”  
  
“But this is important to me. Getting used to my mom being dead during my birthdays was bad enough, but now all my family and friends are gone too!” Jared snaps, starting to breathe hard. “Even last year! Even then Chad was with me, but now maybe even he’s—”  
  
Jared stops speaking abruptly, face turning pale. Jensen waits for him to keep going, not wanting to interrupt again during such a touchy subject; it didn't seem like Jared was done talking but now he looks like he might pass out at any moment. He seems to be lost in his own thoughts, staring nowhere in particular in the kitchen before he slowly turns his head towards the digital radio, lower lip starting to shake.  
  
“Jared, what—?”  
  
But before Jensen can cross the kitchen to get closer to him, Jared lets out a strangled sob, covering his mouth with one hand before he springs out of the kitchen, pushing Jensen out of the way when he runs past him.  
  
“Jared!” Jensen calls again, trying to grab him by his wrist before Jared can leave, but all Jared does is shake Jensen off, crying out a broken _“Just leave me alone!”_ before he disappears to go into his room.  
  
Jensen stands there in the middle of the kitchen, not sure of what just happened. He understands that Jared was upset about Jensen denying him his idea of going outside, but then something else happened. He turns around, staring at the digital radio as a nice song plays out loud. Jensen sighs, leaning against the counter as he tries to pay attention to the music but the voice of the human singing barely registers in Jensen’s head.  
  
He clicks his tongue, deciding that they probably won’t have any breakfast. He knows he can’t have a bite after seeing Jared react like that, so he better starts to clean around.  
  
 _‘Don’t worry…about a thing.’_ Sings the human while Jensen takes the bowl of pancakes mix to put it in the fridge. _‘Because every little thing gonna be alright.’_  
  
Jensen smiles sadly at the lyrics for only a moment. It has a nice message. But even so, Jensen decides to simply turn off the radio a moment later before the song can be over.  
  
  



	14. Chapter 14

  
—Part Fourteen—  
(Jared)

 

 

  
Sheri was the one who started the tradition about birthday roadtrips for all Jared remembers. She wanted to make sure she could make her kid’s birthdays something they would never forget, a memory they could carry when they were adults and far away from home. She had no idea how far away Jared would end but it was like she somehow knew. Moms always do.  
  
They would have three road trips during the year, one for each kid. Jeff, Jared and Megan. They could choose wherever they wanted to go but it would usually be a few towns over, nothing too crazy. Except maybe for the time their dad flew them to Orlando to go to Disneyworld one summer. He counted it as Jared’s birthday trip that time around and all three of them had been so excited about it that Megan and Jeff didn’t even complain about what a big difference it was to drive two hours to a different town and take a plane to another state.  
  
As time went by and all three of them grew up, it became more complicated to put the family together to go on small trips. Jeff got into Stanford and he always had classes on Saturdays or was working during vacations to pay rent. Besides, it seemed like a waste of money to buy a ticket to fly from California back to San Antonio just to he could take a small trip for Megan or Jared’s birthday. They would all understand, the tradition their mom left and they tried to keep allive like an extension of Sheri would eventually become too complicated to achieve.  
  
Sometimes Jared’s dad would have to work or Megan would have cheerleader’s practice. Everybody was busy doing their own things. Taking time to drive around an entire weekend became more of a hassle as their kid years were left behind.  
  
And as much as Jared understood that, it always broke something inside of him to not be able to carry on what his mom loved to do for her kids so much. Like he was disappointing his mom even when she was no longer around. So, he kept on going with the tradition with Chad, who always seemed up to take his dad's car and drive Jared anywhere he wanted.  
  
A new tradition. The grown-up version of Sheri’s birthday parties. But it still felt real and that made Jared feel closer to her somehow.  
  
He’s sure this year she would understand. His mom wouldn’t want Jared to get caught just for keeping a tradition she held close to her heart. She would get it. It's not because Jared doesn’t want or didn’t try hard enough to convince Jensen.  
  
Just mentioning going out had led them into a discussion and then the complete denial it ever happened in the first place from Jensen's part. Jensen behaved like usual the rest of the week, not bringing up Jared’s birthday anymore and never asking again what Jared would like to do that day.  
  
Jared isn’t expecting anything anymore. Jensen had tried to join into a celebration that wasn’t part of his own culture and then Jared had been kind of an asshole when Jensen didn’t agree with an idea that could potentially harm Jared. He doesn't blame Jensen for deciding to just ignore the event altogether, he doesn't have to put up with such a bother anyway. Jared brought it on himself.  
  
He eventually explained about the song when Jensen later on asked about it. Jared told him it was Chad’s song, how it hit him in the wrong place at the wrong time, like a cruel reminder that he wouldn’t see his best friend ever again when only a couple years ago they would have been packing and planning where to travel this time.  
  
Jensen seemed to understand that and he looked really sorry about Jared’s loss, but that was it. They talked about Chad and Bob Marley, the best songs he ever wrote and why Chad liked them so much. But Jared’s birthday didn’t came up again. And Jared didn’t say a word about it during the week.  
  
He could take a hint.  
  
The night before his birthday, Jared goes to sleep early, not feeling like waiting for midnight, realizing how stupid this whole thing is in the first place. Wanting to celebrate your birthday when the human race went to shit and there are few of them still alive is ridiculous. Just because Jared was lucky enough to find Jensen, it doesn't mean things are going to be like before. And that includes his birthday, he should be grateful he's alive and forget about the rest. Trivial things like this should be left behind.  
  
Jared goes into Jensen’s room for a second to wish him a good night, but all Jensen does is mumble a faint _“goodnight”_ in return without even looking up from his book.  
  
Jared falls asleep that night swimming in disappointment, just to be waken up hours later by Jensen, who keeps on shaking one of Jared's arms and telling him to get out of bed already.  
  
He groans and pulls his blankets up, telling Jensen to piss off, but all Jensen does is laugh and pull the covers off Jared.  
  
It’s summer in Texas so Jared technically doesn’t need them, but thank god that Jensen likes to keep the house cold all day long by leaving the AC running even during nightime. Which means Jared actually gets cold at night and needs his blankets to sleep, so basically Jensen just pulled the worst dick move ever by waking him up like this. _On his birthday_. The fact that they aren’t going to celebrate it doesn’t mean Jensen gets to be mean today.  
  
What happened to his stupid shifter beliefs about being a goodie-goodie all year round?  
  
“Jared, stop that!” Jensen laughs again, way too cheerful when it's this early in the morning. And Jared can tell it's early because he set the alarm for 9 a.m. and no alarm has gone off yet. Anything earlier than nine is too early and Jensen needs to _leave_. “Wake up!”  
  
“Leave me alone.” Jared groans, turning on the bed and pressing his face into his pillow. “Jensen, fuck off, I’m serious. I’m not in the mood today.”  
  
But instead of listening to him, like Jensen usually does, the goddamn alien decides to keep on shaking Jared on the bed non-stop. Jared tries to ignore him for as long as possible, but he’s wide awake now and two seconds away from kicking Jensen in the stomach.  
  
Jared finally turns around on the bed, sitting up and snapping a loud _“What?”_ as he opens his eyes.  
  
Jensen has already showered and is wearing the type of clothes he would wear during days he spends at home. Jeans and a shirt. No suit or healer coat. Which is weird, because it’s a week day and Jensen should be getting ready to go to the Hospital.  
  
But instead, he’s standing in Jared’s room, holding what looks like a homemade chocolate cake and looking at Jared with an excited expression.  
  
“Happy Birthday, Jared.” Jensen smiles at him, sitting on the bed and bringing the cake closer. “We’re going out today, so you better get ready.”  
  
Jared opens and closes his mouth pathetically, like a fish out of the water, looking from the cake to Jensen’s cheerful face, not sure that he actually heard him correctly. Jensen is not only celebrating with Jared, he’s actually going to do the only thing Jared asked for. But there’s no way. Jensen seemed angry the first time Jared brought up the idea and kept insisting about it. Jensen had said it was too risky, he insisted he wasn’t up for taking Jared out with a bunch of shifters around them. Not even if it was Jared's birthday.  
  
“Are you-are you serious?” Jared whispers, biting onto his lower lip. “If this is a joke then it’s really cruel.”  
  
Jensen chuckles, shaking his head. “No joke. I’ve got it all planned out. So you better get ready, we have lots of places to go today.”  
  
Lots of places? Not just one? It can’t be real.  
  
Jared keeps on staring at Jensen, biting on his lower lip harder than before as he feels his eyes start to water and heart do something as embarrassing as skipping a beat as he looks at his name written on the chocolate cake. _No_. He’s not going to cry. Not today, not in front of Jensen. The shifter has already seen him cry for a lifetime.  
  
Yet this would be the very first time Jensen sees him cry out of happiness.  
  
“That’s if you still want to go, of course.” Jensen adds after a second, frowning at the lack of Jared’s response. “Or is it the cake? I didn’t ask which one you liked the most because it was a surprise, and you usually like sweets so much that I just assumed—”  
  
Jared pushes himself into Jensen’s arms, being careful to not throw the cake off of Jensen's hand as he puts his arms around Jensen's neck, hugging him tight. Jared presses his face in the space between Jensen’s shoulder and neck and takes a deep, shaky breath, still trying to control his sudden need to cry like a baby. Jensen uses his free arm to hug Jared too, rubbing up and down his back softly. Jared smiles instantly at the contact, squeezing Jensen even closer to himself, pressing his face to Jensen’s so they can be cheek-to-cheek.  
  
“Thank you.” Jared whispers, holding onto Jensen’s shirt, heart beating fast. “Thank you so much, Jensen.”  
  
He feels Jensen smile, faces pressed so close Jared can actually feel the momentof the muscles when it happens. Jensen brings up the hand on Jared’s back to then leave it on his head, stroking Jared’s hair a couple times before pressing it on Jared's neck. Jared feels tingles from the top of his head to the tip of his toes almost instantly, melting into the contact.  
  
“Anything for you, Jay.”  
  
Jared has told Jensen that’s a nickname some friends and family had for him but Jensen hasn't used it so far.  
  
Right now, Jared doesn't think he ever felt happier about anyone calling him _Jay_ before.  
  
He makes sure to blow out the candle on top of the cake right after he's done hugging Jensen like his life depends on it, eating a pig peace while ignoring Jensen’s nutritional facts about how bad it is for the human body to eat candy first thing in the morning. Jared barely pays attention to his healer talk, munching on his birthday cake happily and only adding that if Jensen didn’t want him to eat it right away he should have brought the cake later. There’s no way Jared is not eating chocolate right after smelling it.  
  
Besides, it’s really good. He can’t believe is the first time Jensen baked something. Damn shifter has to be good at everything.  
  
Jared makes sure to shower and get ready in record time that morning, almost jumping on the couch in the living room as he waits for Jensen to finish cleaning the kitchen.  
  
Jensen also made eggs and toasts as a _real_ breakfast after Jared was done eating his cake—which meant another ten minutes of Jensen nagging about nutritional facts—and then told Jared to go wait in the living room because he wasn’t allowed to help clean that day.  
  
Jared could be reading one of his books or watching a boring movie on TV, but he doesn’t want to do anything, too nervous and excited to stay still. So he sits there and waits for Jensen to finish cleaning, bouncing on the couch and giving Jensen big smiles whenever Jensen glances in his direction, clearly amuse by Jared’s attitude.  
  
“Alright.” Jensen finally sits down in front of Jared twenty minutes later. “If we’re doing this, you need to promise— _no_ , you have to swear on everything that you will follow my instructions word by word, Jared.”  
  
Jared nods violently, sitting on the edge of the couch and holding his breath.  
  
“Every little thing. You will pay attention and follow my instructions and if at any time I feel like anyone is getting suspicious, we’re coming back.” Jensen points at him warningly and Jared nods like his life depends on it once more. “And if I tell you we’re coming back, you are not going to freak out or try to run away. You're going to follow my instructions even if we have an emergency out there. We clear, birthday boy?”  
  
Jared smiles so hard he thinks his cheeks are going explode. “I swear, Jensen.”  
  
“Okay. Pay attention then, this is going to be a long class.”  
  
There’s something that not a single human survivor ever knew and could have helped Jared and his group a lot if they ever found out back then. Jared only knows now because Jensen has explained this to him, and it's also the key to understand why he and Chad could get away with living in two cities even after shifter colonization.  
  
Shifters can’t tell humans apart from his own kind. Not physically, at least.  
  
They could see Jared walking down the street and they wouldn’t be able to know he’s not a shifter just by his physical appearance. There’s no way for them to realize Jared is a human just because of how he looks.  
  
The reason why shifters and Collectors can distinguish humans is not for the way the look, but because of how they behave. Humans hide, humans run when they see shifters, human carry guns, humans break into houses to steal, humans are violent and try to hurt shifters, humans are _humans_. What makes them who they are is not their body but how they act.  
  
Jensen explains that every time Jared almost got caught is because he was displaying one of those obvious human traits. The woman who was already living in Jared’s house knew right away because Jared was there “stealing”. Sure, everything in the house belonged to Jared's and Jensen agrees on that, but for the female shifter it was _her apartment_ now and it obvious that only a human would break in. Then, the times Chad and Jared went into a store and tried to pay, it was probably around the time when the world was vastly populated by shifters already, which means they didn’t have to really pay for the things they needed. That’s how the cashier knew, just after Chad tried to hang her some money.  
  
And then, when Chad, Sandy and Jared broke in that house—well, it’s pretty obvious. They broke in, they were stealing and they had guns.  
  
So, if Jared simply knows how to behave when they go out, if he can do it in a way that won’t be suspicious or bring any attention to him, nobody will be able to tell he’s a human.  
  
Of course he wouldn’t be able to do that without Jensen right there, a shifter who knows exactly what could get Jared caught and every little thing Jared has to do and say once they step out of the house.  
  
They spend almost an hour talking about it, with Jensen repeating some of the basic instructions over and over again and making Jared quote them back.  
  
Jared is going to take a deep breath and relax once they are outside. He’s going to be by Jensen’s side the whole time and he cannot, by any reason, go on his own. He won’t speak to anybody unless someone addresses him directly, otherwise Jensen is doing all the talking. In case a shifter speaks to him, Jared needs to act natural. He has to answer back, talk like he always does. He has to avoid swearing words and make sure to throw some smiles around, be polite to other shifters if they say _hi_ an even wish them a good day.  
  
Jensen makes Jared memorize a quick back story in case it's necessary, but it’s all basic fake information. Shifters love to find out where other shifters come from, what planets they have visited, it's one of the most common topics when meeting someone new on the streets. Jared can give his real name if he wants and say that “Padalecki” is just the last name that he got assigned, exactly how Jensen got named “Ackles” when he arrived to Earth. Jensen tells him some things about the planet Jared is supposed to have moved from, how creatures look there and how long he stayed. Conversational facts, things that will make it seem like Jared is one of them too.  
  
Of course there are many other indications. Jared can’t under any reason run away if they drive or walk past a group of Collectors. Jared has to smile at them and wish them a good day, no a trait of fear in his eyes. Jared can’t openly point at things and ask about them but rather wait until they are alone again so Jensen can answer him without it looking suspcious.  
  
And the list of rules keeps on going on and on.  
  
Jared keeps on repeating everything in his head along with his fake back-story, even reciting it to Jensen until he’s standing in front of the door and they are about to leave.  
  
The reason why Jensen woke him up so early was so they could study the instructions for Jared’s safety. And also because Jensen doesn’t want many of his neighbors to see Jared leaving the house. He doesn’t want any of them coming to ask if Jared is new around or if he is Jensen’s roommate now; they would ask why Jensen didn’t tell them someone else moved in to throw Jared a welcome party and it would become a mess to explain.  
  
Jensen knows that by this hour shifters around his neighborhood have already left for work or are sleeping in.  
  
“Ready?” Jensen asks by his side, placing his hand on Jared’s back.  
  
Jared takes a deep breath, staring at the closed door as hears his own heartbeat in his ears. He nods, cleaning the sweat on his palms on his jeans before giving Jensen a glance. He’s embarrassed to ask. It’s just him stepping out of a door—no big deal—but even after all the reassurance Jensen has given him, Jared’s is still somehow thinking there’s going to be a group of those shifters dressed in white waiting to outside of the house to take him away.  
  
“Would you…” Jared starts and then bites his lips, taking another breath while looking away. “Would you mind holding my hand? I know is just a stupid door and your car is parked right in front of the house, but—”  
  
Before Jared can finish explaining the reasons why asking for Jensen to hold his hand is stupid and unnecessary, Jensen slides his hand down Jared’s right arm until his fingertips are touching Jared’s palm. Jared stops talking immediately, turning his head towards Jensen, who’s looking straight ahead as he brushes Jared fingers gently before squeezing his hand.  
  
From all the different types of casual touching they have shared so far, they have never held hands before. Jensen has asked about it, of course—curious about so many mentions of it in romance novels—and Jared has done his best to try and explain it. Now Jared knows he did a half assed job telling Jensen what it means and how it feels. This is so different than all the other times Jared held hands with anyone else. There's no way to put it into words.  
  
Jensen holds Jared’s hand and Jared knows he can step outside of the door, or even into a whole new planet, as long as he gets to keep Jensen by his side.  
  
Jared has the honor to push the door open himself, sunlight hitting him right in the face and heat clinging to his skin. It’s hot outside and it smell like freshly mown grass. Jared brings his free hand up, trying to cover himself from the sun light as they step into the front yard.  He hasn’t seen the outside of Jensen’s house since he broke in months ago. And even then it was nighttime and raining like crazy, not to mention Jared was terrified out of his mind and could barely think beyond his fear and bleeding arm.  
  
Jensen lives in a beautiful neighborhood. _They_ do. All the houses appear to have a similar architecture designs, yet some of them seem bigger since they are two story houses.  
  
A quick look down the street lets Jared know there are no shifters out, heart beating hard in his chest.  
  
He’s outside. Jared is out of the house, about to go to the city—he supposes, Jensen hasn’t really said what they are doing—without running or needing to hide. Jared almost forgot how it feels. To be, somehow, _free_. He hasn’t experienced this feeling in almost three years. The simple pleasure of going out to have fun seems like a dream.  
  
Jensen squeezes his hand and Jared looks up without realizing his’s smiling while breathing hard, not even caring about the hot weather.  
  
“How you like our neighborhood?”  
  
Our. That alone makes something spark in Jared’s chest. Which is bad. He has enough sparks around Jensen already.  
  
“It’s really nice.” Jared whispers, looking at everything like _he’s_ the alien stepping on Earth for the first time.  
  
Houses, grass, car, mailboxes, fences. All things Jared saw before, things he was used to, but now they feel like something completely new and wonderful. Jared has never been so happy to step outside during a sunny day.  
  
“The flowers we have in the house!” Jared gasps suddenly, pulling Jensen along as he steps on the grass, walking closer to the flowers planted around the house. “I didn’t know they were so many!”  
  
“You know, in all this time it didn’t occur to me I could have just taken pictures of the surroundings of the house.” Jensen clicks his tongue as Jared shakes his head in response.  
  
“No. I like this better, I love being able to see them myself for the first time.”  
  
“There weren’t so many before though, I have been planting more since you said you liked them.”  
  
Jared turns around as he hears Jensen, a new spark making him want to give Jensen another hug.  
  
Jensen's looking at Jared in _that way_ again. Jared wishes he could read Jensen’s mind just so he could know what Jensen is thinking when he looks at Jared without saying a word.  
  
Jared wants to know what Jensen thinks of him more than anything.  
  
They give a quick look around the house, with Jensen allowing it only because there are no shifters down the street, but then he convinces Jared to get in the car. Jensen had already explained how shifters have eco-friendly cars and they are only a little different to the cars Jared was used to. On the inside they look like a high-tech version of the car Jared’s brother used to drive. It has multiple screens and many of the functions inside activate with voice control. Jared sits on the passenger sit, smiling nonstop and asking about every little thing as Jensen takes the car out onto the street and drives offw.  
  
Jared’s outside. In a car. And he’s going to be around other shifters who aren’t Jensen and he won’t have to hide away.  
  
It still blows his mind.  
  
“Where are we going anyway?” Jared asks fifteen minutes later after a quick session of him pointing at every single screen and button in the car while asking _“what does this do?”_ over and over again.  
  
“Well, I thought that while I don’t mind sharing clothes or getting you some every now and then, I never seem to get your size right and we have different taste when it comes down to clothes. So maybe you could actually get something you liked this time.” Jensen shrugs, giving Jared a quick smile. “Everything is free, so we’re going to a mall to get you whatever you want.”  
  
Jared feels his mouth hanging opening, looking at Jensen in surprise.  
  
“Are you serious?” He’s incredibly excited, of course. Anything he wants. For fucking _free_. But he’s also starting to get nervous now. “Won’t the mall be full of shifters, though?”  
  
“Not so much, today is a working day.”  
  
It surprises Jared how much that works how it did when Earth was populated by humans instead.  
  
“How are you missing work, by the way?”  
  
“Asked for a free day, said I had some personal errands.” Jensen explains as he turns left down the street. Jared tenses immediately when he starts to see more cars around them, sinking into the chair. Jensen’s right hand finds Jared’s and holds it again, giving it a soft squeeze, all while keeping his eyes on the road. _Everything’s alright_. Jared's in the car. They can’t tell Jared is a human by the way he looks, and he’s with Jensen. _Jared’s fine_. “I arranged it days ago, so I didn’t have any patients for today.”  
  
“T-That’s great.” Jared hisses through his teeth, body tense as they stop next to another car when the traffic light changes to red. A quick glance lets Jared see it’s a woman who looks younger than Jensen but older than him.  
  
“Jared, you’re alright.” Jensen mumbls, still looking straight ahead, stroking the back of Jared’s hand with his thumb. Jared holds back for dear life, nodding a couple time as he tries to steady his breathing. “She doesn’t know. It’s impossible for her to know.”  
  
“She doesn’t know. She can’t.” Jared repeats out loud, like that will make it more real. “But what if she does?”  
  
“Just turn around and smile to her. Come on, trust me.”  
  
Jared holds onto Jensen’s hand so hard that he thinks he’s going to break it, yet all Jensen does is hold back to give Jared some kind of reassurance. Jared takes a long, deep breath, feeling his mouth go dry. He trusts Jensen. He would never lie to Jared or put him in danger. Jensen’s different.  
  
Turning his head slowly to look out the window, he watches the woman tap her fingers on the wheel of the car, looking at the road. Jared licks his lips nervously, almost praying for her to not notice that Jared is staring, but after fifteen seconds of so, she turns her head left and locks eyes with Jared.  
  
He digs his nails on Jensen’s hand immediately, yet all Jensen does is huff and then laugh a little, nudging Jared with his elbow. Jared pushes himself to do it, slowly giving her a timid smile before raising his right hand to wave.  
  
She smiles back a heartbeat later, moving one of her hands away from the wheel to wave back at Jared before mouthing _“Good morning.”_ Jared feels like his heart is gonna sink down to his stomach as he tries to keep the smile on his face, giving her a nod in return. Jared feels Jensen let go of his hand just for one second to also wave at the female shifte; Jared almost wants to take the hand mid-air and put it back on his lap so they can keep holding hands instead. But that would be a weird behavior, so he restrains the impulse until Jensen grabs onto his hand again.  
  
The light changes to green and Jared feels like he can breathe properly again, throwing his head back and cleaning the sweat off of his forehead.  
  
“Oh my God.” Jared whispers, shaking his head as he starts to draw a smile. “Did you _see_ me? Did you see _that?_ She didn’t know at all! She even waved back at me and she didn’t know I’m a human!”  
  
“Proud of you.” Jensen nods and Jared laughs loudly, letting relief wash over him as he bounces on the passenger seat while rubbing the red marks he just left with his nails on Jensen’s skin.  
  
Jared is so blown away by the whole thing that he waves at three other cars on their way to the mall, all the shifters waving back just like the woman did, making Jared squirm in delight while Jensen laughs by his side, watching Jared enjoy himself.  
  
It’s a little different once they park and it's time to go inside a place with a good amount of aliens. The car isn’t there anymore to keep Jared away and safe, but Jensen is still there, who offers his hand once again. Jared clings to him, walking plastered by Jensen's side while simultaneously trying to act normal.  
  
He thinks he doesn’t breathe as soon as they walk into the mall, already seeing shifters working in the stores, couples walking around, someone repairing one of the elevators. Jensen moves closer, brushing Jared’s ear with his lips—making Jared’s brain disconnect for a good minute, completely forgetting where he’s standing—and telling him to relax. Everything is going to be alright.  
  
“I won’t let anything bad happen to you.”  
  
Jared has never believed something so much in his life.  
  
Just like the woman in the car, nobody around Jared seems to notice Jared's different from them. He doesn’t move an inch away from Jensen, but he tries his best to not look too tense, smiling to some shifters every now and then. They don’t seem that terrifying once you’re not trying to run away from the ones dressed in white. But Jared still doesn’t like them. He just likes Jensen. He’s still Jared's exception.  
  
Luckily, Jared feeñs better as they go inside of one of the stores and Jensen indicates they’ll just take a look around when one of the employees tries to approach them to offer some help. Jared is grateful to not find the place as packed as he imagined.  
  
The entire time they pick Jared’s clothes, Jared doesn’t more than thirty centimeters away from Jensen, which makes him feel much more comfortable. He rejects Jensen’s idea of going into the changing room to try on some shirts, arguing that Jensen would have to wait outside. Jared’s fine, he knows if a shirt will fit him by just looking at it.  
  
Jensen laughs at some of the shirts Jared picks, making fun of the printed design on them. Jared shoves him away playfully—just to then move close to him once again—and tells Jensen to fuck off in a whisper. They are _not_ ugly shirts. They just have personality, which Jensen happens to know nothing about.  
  
Jared also gets to prove on ten different benies, just to then pick every single one of them, adding them to the shopping cart Jensen has been pushing around the store. He gets a new pair of sunglasses, socks, underwear and two new pairs of shoes. It’s strange to not worry about the prize tag every single time he decides to take something, throwing worried glances at Jensen. Jared doesn’t want to abuse the system and take more than he needs, but Jensen keeps on encouraging Jared to take whatever he wants.  
  
By the time they make it to the cash register, half the car is full of clothes and Jared is pressed to Jensen’s side once again. Jensen puts his arm around Jared’s hips this time, and for a good minute Jared doesn’t even realize it's only to put on an act in front of the cashier. He’s so used to Jensen touching him that Jared just though that Jensen wanted to have Jared closer.  
  
“Nice beanies.” The woman behind the register nods her approval, and if Jared wasn’t a little terrified to be so close to a shifter who’s not Jensen, he would have bragged to Jensen about what a good taste he has and how Jensen has no room to make fun of Jare's cool shirts with personality. “You're making a wardrobe change or something?”  
  
Jared swallows, looking at the cashier and then back at Jensen, but Jensen steps in to answer before Jared has time to freak out.  
  
“We just moved to Earth.” Jensen brings Jared a little closer and Jared rolls with it, giving the woman a little smile. “Our accommodator told us to come here and fill our closets.”  
  
“That’s wonderful!” She cheers, helping them back everything on different paper bags. “Clothes are a fun part of living here, aren’t they?” She smiles at Jared who simply nods, not saying a word. “I hope you guys enjoy them. And welcome to Earth.”  
  
It’s the most bizarre thing anyone has told Jared. Being welcomed into his own planet. Incredible.  
  
Jensen thanks the shifter and then takes most of the bags, giving only a couple to Jared—who is too busy still hugging Jensen for dear life—saying goodbye to the employees before they leave the store.  
  
“All this stuff for free.” Jared whispers, awestruck as he looks at the bags. “You guys are insane.”  
  
Jensen laughs by his side, arm still around Jared's waist as they go into another store for Jared to pick more things to decorate his room and then maybe a couple new books.  
  
By the time they leave the mall some hours later, they can barely carry all the paper bags along with the ice cream cone Jared got on their way out. Jensen had to order for him, of course, Jared is getting used to being around shifters but he doesn’t feel like speaking to them yet. He thinks he will screw everything up as soon as he opens his mouth. They can’t tell Jared is a human by the way he looks, but they will sure as hell realize it if he says the wrong thing. Jared's okay shutting his mouth and letting Jensen do all the talking.  
  
All the bags fill up now only the trunk but also the passenger seat, and as soon as they are back in the car, Jared starts to attack Jensen with question after question. He tried to memorize every single thing he wanted to ask about once they were alone, and Jensen seems more than pleased with Jared’s good behavior by following the rules he was told. Jared almost beams at Jensen’s praise, proud of himself. Maybe if he does good enough this won’t be the last time they go out together.  
  
For lunch, they go into _Whataburger_. Of course. Jensen comments how Jared shouldn’t get anything but his favorite food for his birthday, and Jared honestly can’t believe he’s going to walk into a _Whataburger_ again. When he was hiding away in the old factory he didn’t even imagine he could do something like that for the rest of his life. And now here he is, sitting across from Jensen, happily eating a burger, left hand linked with Jensen’s over the table. Jensen helps Jared relax so much he actually laughs out loud at his jokes in a restaurant full of shifters, only focusing on Jensen and forgetting about the rest of the world.  
  
If there’s a prove that the Universe is incredible it’s probably right there. Jared is eating with an alien, holding his hand and hoping Jensen won’t ever let go of him.  
  
The real roadtrip happens by the end of the day, after they drive around the city a couple times. Jared has been inside their house for so long that he just misses sitting in a car and looking out of the window, feeling free and normal for the first time in three whole years. Jensen even shows him the Hospital where he works, the library where he got all the banned books from and all the new places shifters have built since they took over the city.  
  
At the end of the afternoon they drive to the outsides of Dallas, finally stopping at one side of the road after almost an hour of driving. There’s nobody there. Not cars passing by or shifters' houses in the area. It’s just the two of them and miles of nature and an empty road. Jensen explains that maybe this not exactly a roadtrip, they are not even making it to another city, yet this is the exact spot he wanted to bring Jared to for his birthay.  
  
Whenever he thought about bringing Jared outside, Jensen could only imagine them coming here.  
  
“Get out of the car and look at the sky.”  
  
Jared does as he’s told, only realizing how dark it is once he looks up, getting a perfect view of the sky covered in stars. He hears himself gasp, not even wanting to blink, scared that the million white dots will dissapear if he looks away. Jared has never seen so many stars in his life, like a sea of diamonds in the sky.  
  
“How?” He whispers once he feels Jensen getting out of the car too, closing the door and walking around the car to get by his side. “Where did all these starts come from?”  
  
“They have always been here, Jared.” Jensen mumbles, leaning into the car as he looks up too. Jared turns his head towards him, feeling a sudden pressure over his chest when he sees the emotion in Jensen’s face once he gets a glance at the sky. “This is what happens when light pollution and contamination doesn’t hide the Milky Way.”  
  
“It’s… _beautiful_.” Jared breaths out, mesmerized by the colors of the night. Black blending with blue that fades into bright purple.  
  
“Birthdays are a human tradition, but star gazing is what we shifters do when we want to celebrate something important.” As Jensen explains, he closes the passenger seat door and then winks at Jared. “I wanted to celebrate you the way we do.”  
  
Jared swallows slowly, suddenly feeling incredibly sentimental that Jensen would ever share something like this with him. He’s not only going along with Jared’s human tradition, Jensen's bringing his own as well.  
  
Jensen’s celebrating Jared like they are the equals. Like they are both the same, no interspecies barrier, no differences between them. It’s just the two of them. Jared and Jensen. Nothing beyond that really matters.  
  
They end up sitting on the roof of Jensen’s car, both of them looking up at the sky as Jensen talks, explaining Jared things he never knew about planets and stars.  
  
“You know, stars can help us find our way, like a compass.” Jensen speaks softly, pointing at certain dots in the sky. “They have done it since the beginning of times, guiding us through the Universe. You can always find your way home as long as you can see the stars.”  
  
Jared smiles as he hears Jensen talk, not only fascinated by the view in front of him but also thinking he has never felt closer to Jensen. He speaks about space in a way that makes Jared happy. Jensen loves space and Jared can understand why. Jensen has seen what’s out there, he knows the cosmos and enjoys teaching Jared about it. It almost feels like Jensen is sharing a secret with him, a part of himself that only Jared gets to see. The way Jensen smiles when names the stars, more crinkles appearing around his eyes. How more feckless seem to appear on his skin under the moon light, making Jensen a sight that could easily make competition to the starry sky in front of them. Or at least he does in Jared’s eyes.  
  
As Jensen keeps on talking, Jared leans into him, tilting his head to press it on Jensen’s shoulder as the shifter explains how you can see Mars, Jupiter, Mercury, Venus and Saturn without a telescope from different countries on Earth at certain moments of the year.  
  
At one point of the explanation, Jensen moves one arm behind Jared’s back, pulling him in closer. Jared smiles, pressing his cheek to Jensen’s neck as the stares at the sky once more, following the figures Jensen traces with his fingers, using the stars as guiding dots.  
  
Jensen shows Jared the constellation of Scorpius, only visible from Texas during summer. He points out Ursa Major, that can always be seen along with the Big Dipper, that is part of the Ursa Major constellation and changes it’s orientation in the early hours of each season.  
  
“See? The sky can tell us more than we can possible imagine. The stars are right there to guide us.”  
  
“You really love this, don’t you?” Jared whispers, moving his head away from Jensen’s shoulder so he can see him clearly. Jensen turns his head, nodding in his direction as he smiles. “Thank you for letting me see this with you, Jensen.”  
  
“I realized how unfair it would be to keep you in the house and make you miss something like this. I wanted to make your day special, even more now that you don’t have your friends or family with you anymore.” Jensen explains, bringing one hand up to tilt Jared’s face by tapping his chin.  
  
“But I have _you_ now.”  
  
Jared doesn’t shy away this time, holding Jensen’s gaze as he smiles in return. Jensen uses the hand he already had on Jared's chin to follow the outline of his face.  
  
“You want to know the more special part about the stars? It’s impossible to tell how far away they are with the naked eye.” Jensen whispers, but this time he doesn’t turn to look up at the sky like before, keeping his eyes fixed on Jared. “You need machines and all sort of technology to point that out. But just by staring at them like this? It’s impossible to make a difference. Do you know what that means?”  
  
Jared shakes his head slowly, sliding his hand over the roof of the car until he can meet with Jensen’s, moving inch by inch until his fingertips can touch him.  
  
“That the only thing we know for sure when looking at the stars with our own eyes is that everything beautiful is far away.” Jensen whispers, moving his hand to tuck some of Jared’s hair behind his ear. “And I know that’s truth because I had to travel through them to find you, Jared.”  
  
Jared breaths out, keeping his eyes fixed on Jensen. And before they can move away once again, Jared leans close and finally kisses Jensen.  
  
It’s impossible for the kiss to feel different than any of the other few kisses Jared has had in his life. Jensen has a human body, the experience shouldn’t be any different even if he’s an alien. And even so, it does. But not because Jensen is different from Jared, but because it’s the first time in Jared’s life that he’s in love with the one he’s kissing. It feels different because is _Jensen_. He presses their lips together, closing his eyes and enjoying the warm sensation that travels down his body as his face starts to heat up.  
  
He doesn’t have time to doubt if perhaps this is not what Jensen wants, because Jensen cups Jared’s face two heartbeats after the kiss starts, kissing Jared back slowly. Following logic, this would be Jensen’s first kiss in this body, perhaps his first in general considering other species have different ways to show affection for what Jensen has told him. So maybe it shouldn’t even be a good kiss, but even if it sucks royally, Jared doesn’t notice. Or even better, he doesn’t think it sucks at all. It feels wonderful. Maybe Jensen even studied how kisses are supposed to function and he’s finally putting in practice.  
  
Jared wouldn’t put it past Jensen to get ten books on the theory of making out.  
  
So they kiss and kiss and then kiss so more. And Jared thinks that his body is going to explode and his heart is beating so hard that Jensen will be able to hear it when they finally pull apart. Jared presses his face into Jensen’s neck, breathing as hard as he’s smiling.  
  
Jensen hugs him in return, arm around his lower back as Jared puts his head on Jensen’s shoulder once again, both of them staring at the starry sky as Jensen continues his explanation about the Milky Way.  
  
  
  
  



	15. Chapter 15

  
—Part Fifteen—  
(Jensen)

 

 

  
From all the human behavior Jensen will never be able to understand, this has to be the worst. The most _painful_ one. He doesn’t think he has ever been this confused before, not in the other ten planets he has visited in galaxies older and bigger than the Milky Way.  
  
Jensen thought what real emotional pain felt like after his grandfather died, but not even that can be compared now. Back then they had all been expecting it for a while, his grandfather kept talking to him about it and explaining Jensen why it was time for him to go, why death was not the end but rather the next big step of life. For them, shifters, it was the next trip beyond space.  
  
By the time it happened, Jensen had been ready.  
  
Nothing could have prepared him for Jared’s behavior the days after his birthday.  
  
After they stayed hours out there, parked in the middle of nowhere stargazing while sitting on the roof of his car, Jared had felt asleep leaning on his shoulder. Jensen had carried him off the car, making Jared sit on the passenger seat for them to drive back home. Now Jensen could consider it his home because Jared was there. And even if Jared was fast asleep the entire trip, Jensen made sure to reach over and look for Jared's hand once again, holding it like they have done that entire day, memories of Jared kissing him flashing in his head the two hours Jensen drove in silence.  
  
Human intimacy is better than Jensen imagined, but books have been wrong. It’s not something you share with everybody, not in the way shifters have been trying to do. Jensen doesn’t care for leaning down and pressing a kiss on Alona’s cheek every day he gets to work. He doesn’t want to embrace Danneel in a hug whenever she goes check on him. Jensen doesn’t want to touch anybody but Jared.  
  
Now he understands why Tom only does it with Mike.  
  
You touch the one you love.  
  
Or at least, Jensen does.  
  
They had been back so late that night that Jensen’s street had been completely alone, not a single shifter out and about, which made easier to carry Jared into the house without anybody getting suspicious. For a moment Jensen had the idea of taking Jared into his own room instead, but he thought that he had work early next day and didn’t want to wake Jared up before time, so Jensen turned left on the first door down the hallway to go in Jared’s room.  
  
As expected, Jensen had to wake up only a couple hours after to get ready to go to work. He made himself the strongest cup of coffee he had on Earth so far, cooked Jared's breakfast and left him a quick note telling him Jensen would be back that night after his shift.  
  
On his way out, Jensen had stopped by Jared’s room, leaning into the doorframe and watching him sleep, starting to smile as Jared tossed around and hugged one of the pillows. Months ago Jensen didn’t even know Jared, and now he can imagine living without him.  
  
That day at work everyone comments on how different Jensen seems, lightly teasing him about his change of mood, but Jensen ignores them all, unable to stop smiling to himself, body itching for time to pass faster so he could go back home and—well, they should probably talk first. Jensen had a lot of things to say to Jared, to nobody’s surprise, but this time it had nothing to do with space and the stars. It was all about the two of them.  
  
Then came what Jensen didn’t expect.  
  
As soon as he got home, Jared had started avoiding Jensen’s attempts to get close and talk. Jared tried to act normal, but it was a weird version of their relationship before his birthday. Jared would be around Jensen whenever he was back from work, sitting on the counter reading while Jensen cooked or across from him on the couch as they watched a movie in silence. But he would also leave the room if Jensen tried to talk about anything that wasn’t trivial work chat or the list of repetitive activities Jared did that day at home.  
  
Even worse, Jared would move away if Jensen tried to reach over to touch him. He wouldn’t let Jensen brush his hair nor allow Jensen to slide the tip of his fingertips over his hand.  
  
It provoked a kind of pain Jensen had never experienced before. He didn’t know it was possible to feel _physical_ pain—like someone was digging their nails in the underside of his heart—because of emotional conflicts. No book ever warned him a heartbreak is more than a romantic concept.  
  
 _Humans are cruel._ Jensen thought every now and then, observing his own palm and remembering all the time he and Jared spend holding hands days ago.  
  
But Jared isn’t. Jared is none of the things Jensen ever learned about humans. He’s not evil, violent, selfish or cruel. He wouldn’t inflict this kind of pain in Jensen on purpose. The only logical explanation is that Jensen misinterpreted everything from the beginning. While the human version of intimacy has different connotations for him, it’s something Jared has dealt with all his life. It’s not that special or new for him. All the little things that Jensen had picked as hopeful clues that Jared felt the same way he did could mean absolutely nothing in Jared’s head.  
  
Not even the moment they kissed.  
  
Kissing was common among humans, wasn’t it? _Of course_. Even bigger levels of intimacy could be performed between strangers who would meet at a bar, spend the night together to then never see each other again. Kissing was nothing. While it represented the first time Jensen ever engaged in any show of romantic feelings in a traditional human way, it was nothing new for Jared. He had kissed others before Jensen and he wasn’t with any of them any longer, was he?  
  
 _"A gentleman doesn’t kiss and tell."_ Jensen reads in one of the few books about human love he finds in the library after work, barely speaking to Mrs. Ferris, not greeting nor smiling back to any of the shifters who try to talk with him.  
  
Book after book, phrase after phrase. _“There’s a weird pleasure in loving someone who doesn’t love you”._ They all seem to blend together in Jensen’s head, frustrating him and increasing the physical pain in his chest. _“I loved him in the way some people are to be loved – from a distance.”_  
  
He doesn’t get it. Jensen doesn’t understand a thing. Human romance seems too complicated, too far way for him to reach with his hand. Jensen can’t do it, he can take all the books left in the world or sit across from Jared in the living room for a lifetime and he will never be able to understand.  
  
Because it’s not a type of love made for him. Jensen can seem like a human, he can lie like a human and try to be a human, but he will never become one.  
  
Jensen thought he could reach the gap between himself and Jared and was almost convinced he had done it the night they got close enough to kiss. But just as it happened many times before when it concerned _human behavior_ and _Jared_ , Jensen was wrong.  
  
Can a shifter fall in love with a human? Yes, absolutely. But the human won’t love him in return. That’s the end of the story.  
  
How ironic that the best feeling in the Universe can wake up all the bad emotions shifters are so scared for. That's what none of them was able to predict once they landed on Earth. What not even Jensen understood until it was too late. All the bad human emotions and behavior that are engraved inside of him by this point didn’t start own their own.  
  
They were all born out of love.  
  
Lying to protect. Jealousy and anger over not being able to have. Greed for desiring what he shouldn’t want. Betrayal of his entire race to remain close to only one human.  
  
Shifters don0t know that what they should be avoiding on Earth is love.  
  
At least if it implicates a human in the equation. Human love is not for Jensen’s kind.  
  
And Jared’s love is not for Jensen. Period.  
  
That night he drives to Tom and Mike’s place after spending a couple hours at the library, frustration and sorrow growing out of control in his system. Going back home to sit and pretend in front of Jared is becoming a daily torture. He drops by their friend’s apartment unannounced, trying to find some answers that books and research couldn’t give him. His friends are surprised to see Jensen appear without the need of a forced invitation, and then confused to hear Jensen ramble about the whole thing without giving many details.  
  
He doesn’t mention Jared’s a human—the key of the problem—but even in this situation he knows it would be stupid to share that little part of the story.  
  
Sadly, they are not much help. They have a shifter conception to form opinions on the whole problem. They don’t get it either. Just like Jensen, they are different, not human enough. They seem more surprised that Jensen has feelings for anyone at all and keep on insisting he should talk to the other shifter. They think Jensen has feelings for one of their own, _of course_.  
  
That’s probably what’s tipping them off and making the whole thing so confusing: a shifter wouldn’t behave like Jared is doing.  
  
That’s the breaking point, isn’t it? Jared’s not a shifter. Jensen’s not a human. Everything beyond that doesn’t matter.  
  
After leaving Tom and Mike’s place, Jensen decides to drive around, still refusing to go home and play pretend. It hurts too much. He could probably choose to move to another galaxy and it would hurt just as much over there, too. No matter where Jensen does, _there it is_.  
  
His unrequited love for Jared.  
  
Not even his healer abilities can fix a broken heart.  
  
It’s ironic to think Jensen would always rush back home as soon as work was over, eager to see Jared more than anyone. And now he can’t even bring himself to go home. How could he be so blind for so long? How could Jensen not realize he was falling in love with Jared every day they stayed together? He tried to find excuses to the reasons why he felt the way he did around Jared when the answer was in front of his face the whole time.  
  
His long drive ends taking him nowhere else but the outsides of Dallas once again, not the exact spot he went with Jared for his birthday, yet it's still away from the city and anybody else. Jensen parks his car at one side of the road before getting out, leaning against the door as he looks up at the dark sky.  
  
Watching the stars has always given Jensen some kind of direction, he didn’t lie to Jared then, he truly finds his way whenever he stops and sees all the celestial bodies above him. Maybe that's because it reminds Jensen where he comes from, all that he has learned while traveling the Universe. The stars remind Jensen of his past and have always shown him his future too, because he would always end up somewhere different in space eventually. He thought traveling the Universe would always be his mission in life, exploring all the planets he could possibly visit.  
  
Jensen read that humans tried to do that at their own pace with the limited technology they bad. They built spacecrafts to explore their solar system and called them _Voyager_ , a word that does not exist in shifter language.  
  
Now Jensen knows that a voyager is someone who goes on a long trip, especially if they travel in a ship. The word has usually been assigned to describe explorers who would take a trip to a far away land. A very appropriate name for an object that would travel through space and also an even better word to describe what Jensen thought his life would consist on.  
  
Jensen _was_ a voyager. But he’s not anymore.  
  
Because when he looks at the stars up in the sky he doesn’t see his future anymore. He can’t see himself traveling to another planet. Jensen can’t leave anymore.  
  
He has found his home, and is not Earth. Is Jared.  
  
Jensen looks at the starry sky an even if he still feels the same emotional connection, he can’t find the answers up there any longer. The beauty of the night can’t take the pain of his heart. The stars aren’t the biggest source of light in Jensen’s life any longer.  
  
After a couple minutes, he gets back in his car and drives away, not finding any answers how he expected. Instead, he's feeling even worse than before now that he has realized not even the endless knowledge and peace of the Universe can help him. Nothing in the vastness of life can solve what only one human can fix.  
  
By the time he gets back home and parks in front of his house, is almost two in the morning and the street is a desolated as the night he carried Jared in after they went stargazing together. He sighs, staring ahead at the silent house before finally getting out of the car and dragging his feet to the entry, pushing the door open after unlocking the only house on Earth that needs to be secured from all the shifters outside.  
  
He only gets to step into the dark living room and close the door behind him before feeling two hands grabbing him by his shoulders, pulling him inside violently just as Jensen touches the switch on the wall.  
  
Jensen stumbles forward—almost falling to the floor if it wasn’t for the hands on his shoulders—just as the entire room lights up.  
  
“What the—!”  
  
“Where the _fuck_ have you been!” Jared yells, making Jensen turn his head to look at him, finding Jared only a couple centimeters away from his face, eyes red and thin wet trails all over his cheeks.  
  
Jensen blinks, confused as he stares at Jared, who only grips his shoulders harder.  
  
“Answer me, Jensen!”  
  
“I-I went to the library!” Jensen mumbles, frowning as he sees Jared bite onto his lower lip and angrily fight to hold in his tears. “And then to visit Tom and Mike…later I decided to drive around but…”  
  
“Your shift at the Hospital was over nine hours ago.” Jared whispers, voice shaky. “ _Nine_. Which means you would have usually been back eight hours ago but you _weren’t_.” He almost sneers, holding onto Jensen’s shoulders so hard his knuckles start to turn white.  
  
“I changed my mind during the day, I didn’t have anything planned—”  
  
“Do you even understand what I have been thinking the last eight fucking hours you were out and about?” Jared shouts, finally letting go of him just to shove Jensen away. “I was losing my mind over the idea of that stupid Security Division taking you away!”  
  
Jensen shakes his head, even more confused than before.  
  
“Why would they—?”  
  
“Oh, I don’t know!” Jared yells again, throwing his arms in the air and then using one of his hands to rub his eyes. “Maybe because you’re illegally keeping a human in your place? Maybe I didn’t do that good on my birthday, maybe someone did pick up that I was acting weird and they called Security to take care of it!”  
  
Jared stops only to take a deep, shaky breath and throw Jensen an angry stare as he blinks and tears keep on falling down his cheeks.  
  
“You told me that if shifters ever caught you helping me they would make you leave Earth.” Jared sniffles, face so full of pain it breaks Jensen’s heart even more. “You said they would make you leave and then they would take me to a Facility. After you were missing for _hours_ I thought—I was almost expecting a Collector to be the one getting in the house to come get me after taking you away.”  
  
To say Jensen feels terribly guilty for not telling Jared that he wouldn’t be back on time is an understatement. In all honestly, it didn’t ever occur to him with their current situation. They barely speak to pretend everything is okay. Jensen didn’t think that calling Jared to tell him he was having an existential crisis because of him was something he should do.  
  
Yet, there’s something that Jensen can’t help focusing on.  
  
“You thought Collectors were coming to get you.” Jensen repeats, an idea that makes him feel really strange in the back of his head, fingers twitching. “And yet…you didn’t leave? Why didn’t you escape?”  
  
Jared looks down, crying silently only a couple steps away from Jensen.  
  
Jensen wants to reach over and hold Jared’s face to make him stop crying, but he won’t touch Jared when he doesn’t want to be touched by Jensen anymore. Jensen won’t do anything Jared doesn’t want him to.  
  
“Why do you think?” Jared finally whispers, looking up at Jensen as he steps close, raising one hand to leave it over Jensen’s chest, right over his beating heart. Jared closes his fist around the fabric of Jensen’s shirt, holding onto it. “I was worried about you.”  
  
“Why?”  
  
“Was me kissing you days ago not enough to make you understand?”  
  
Jensen holds his breath as soon as he hears Jared bring it up, using his right hand to press Jared’s fist against his chest.  
  
“But you started avoiding me all these days, Jared. I was sure you were trying to make me understand I should forget about it.”  
  
“No.” Jared whispers, shaking his head slowly. “I don’t want you to forget the kiss. I don’t want you to forget about us.” He grips into Jensen’s shirt again and Jensen holds onto his hand in response. “And I don’t want you to forget about me when you leave.”  
  
“Leave?”  
  
Jared makes eye content once again, tears rolling down the curve of his nose and cheeks.  
  
“Promise me you won’t forget me when you leave Earth.”  
  
It makes absolutely no sense. Jared doesn’t know what Jared is talking about and the way he keeps holding on and crying is driving Jensen out of his mind. Jensen never wants to be the reason why Jared suffers. He never wants to make Jared cry.  
  
He moves his hand away from Jared’s, just so he can cup his face and clean the tears with both thumbs. Jared sobs as soon as Jensen’s hands touch his skin.  
  
“Jared, please, stop crying. What are you talking about?” Jensen mumbles, desperate from seeing him like this. “I’m not going anywhere! I’m not leaving.”  
  
“Maybe not now, but someday you will. In months, or even years. You’re a shifter.” Jared whispers, crying in Jensen’s hands. “You’ll eventually go to another planet, morph into another body, and I won’t be able to go with you.”  
  
It makes Jensen stop trying to make Jared calm down, his explanation making the constant pain inside of him multiple a hundred times, the idea of leaving Jared behind practically unthinkable.  
  
“That’s what I thought after I woke up the next morning.” Jared sniffs, looking down once again. “I was so stupid happy thinking that you liked me back after I had months dying to tell you. But then I realized how unreasonable I was because…I’m a human.”  
  
“So what?” Jensen snaps, making Jared look up at him. “I don’t care that you’re a human.”  
  
“I can’t be your partner, Jensen.” Jared mumbles sadly. “I can’t live as long as you, I can’t travel the space to go together anywhere just like you say life partners do. I can’t even leave this house so we go on dates. You can’t introduce me to your two best friends.”  
  
Jensen keeps on shaking his head, cleaning Jared’s tears repeatedly while moving even close to Jared and mumbling _“I don’t care, I don’t care about any of that.”_  
  
“And is not only that. I mean, look at me!” Jared brings the hand he had on Jensen’s chest, leaving it on his cheek, making Jensen leaning into it immediately, looking at Jared desperately. “I’m no competition to any other shifter. I’m full of the bad things you guys fear. I’m not perfect, I’m not pure nor good like you are.”  
  
Jared slides his fingertips over Jensen’s lower lip, tilting his head to the right so he can lean into Jensen’s hand on his face.  
  
“I’m just a human.”  
  
Jensen lets out what’s almost a relieved laugh, shaking his head right before he lets go of Jared’s head and takes him by his shoulders, backing him up until he’s pressing Jared to the wall behind them.  
  
“Jared, you’re not _just a_ human.” Jensen whispers, pressing their foreheads together as he strokes one his cheeks. Jensen smiles then, and he knows he can _feel_ the smile now. He feels it every single time he looks at Jared. “You’re _my_ human. And I’m not going anywhere without you.”  
  
And just to make sure he puts his point across, Jensen shows with actions what he can’t make Jared understand with words by kissing him.  
  
Jensen is pleased to feel Jared kissing him back instantly, pain in his chest disappearing.  
  
If the reason why Jared tried pretend nothing happens is because he’s afraid Jensen will leave, he’s going to show Jared there’s nowhere he would rather be that here on Earth with him. Jensen will prove it to him every single day if he has to.  
  
Jared pulls back after a moment so he can breathe, making sure to keep their foreheads pressed together as he moves his hands up to stroke Jensen’s hair. Jensen doesn't even want to blink, not wanting to miss any of Jared's reactions. The way his cheeks are turning red and his eyelids keep on fluttering as he tries to catch his breath. No matter what Jared does, he always looks beautiful. Nothing else Jensen has seen could compare.  
  
“Only two kisses and you’re getting better?” Jared whispers, brushing their lips together but then pulling away when Jensen tries to kiss him once more. “You better not be practicing with anybody else.”  
  
Jensen smiles instantly, letting go of Jared’s shoulders so he can slide his hands down his forearms and then around his waist, pulling him in closer.  
  
“Have you met me? I only want to try everything with you.”  
  
Jared licks his lower lip, smirking at Jensen in return, which makes an endearing view considering Jared’s eyes are still watery and his nose red from crying.  
  
“Good. Then maybe we should make you try all the intimate human actives you have never done before.” Jared links his hands behind Jensen’s neck and brushes their lips once again as he speaks. “It could help with your healer research.”  
  
It takes Jensen ten whole seconds to understand what Jared actually means. He stops trying to chase after Jared’s lips and snaps his eyes up to meet with Jared’s, feeling like someone just punched the air out of him.  
  
Jared bites his lower lip and raises both eyebrows, shrugging a little in response.  
  
“Wait. Jared, did you mean—”  
  
“ _Yes_ , you know exactly what I mean. For once in your life stop _studying_ every single thing I say and _act_ on it instead.” Jared whispers, using his hold on Jensen’s neck to pull him down to both make Jensen kiss him and stop talking. Jensen loses all resolution to complain when he feels Jared’s tongue brushing along his lips so Jensen will open his mouth and they can start to make out properly.  
  
The sensation is a bit strange at first, but as Jensen said, he’s open to try anything Jared wants to teach him. Especially anything that has to do with physical interaction. Jared had been quite right about jerking off, was he not? He clearly knows what he's doing here.  
  
Jared sets the pace of the kiss, slow and moderated, trying to make Jensen get a hang of how he’s supposed to move his tongue along with Jared’s. All while stroking Jensen’s hair with his fingers. Jensen doesn’t know if he’s doing a particularly good job himself, but the more they make out, the more he’s starts to enjoy it. It still has a weird sensation, the feeling of their tongues curling together, but he also understands the appealing of it. He huffs, out of breath, hugging Jared close as he licks into his mouth and gets a little moan out of Jared in return. _Good_. Maybe Jensen doesn’t suck so much at this.  
  
But he’ll be happy to get more lessons anyway.  
  
Jared is the one pulling away once again, causing Jensen to groan a wordless complain and try to chase after Jared’s lips. Jared laughs, brushing Jensen’s nose with his own—almost like he’s nuzzling him—just as Jensen frowns.  
  
“Will you _stop_ doing that? I’m trying to learn properly but I can’t do it if you keep moving away.”  
  
“Bossy, aren’t you?” Jared snickers, moving his right hand from behind Jensen’s neck to clean some of the spit on Jensen’s lower lip. “I like that.”  
  
Something changes in the way Jared is looking at him when he says that and Jensen presses him back onto the wall as pure instinct, pleased to see Jared cling to him in return and nod repeatedly.  
  
“Yes, that’s exactly what I mean.”  
  
“Good. Seems like I’m a fast learner.” Jensen smiles smugly before leaning down, but this time he goes past Jared’s lips so he can press his lips against his neck instead, starting to kiss down his pulse. Jared squirms in his arms as soon as Jensen starts, and for some reason Jensen’s doesn’t quite understand, it makes his ego grow internally.  
  
He likes making Jared react like this, Jensen wants to make him keep doing that.  
  
Jensen’s medical knowledge is what helps him understand why touching certain parts of the human body feels good. The sensitivity all over the skin is high, and there are specific points where such feeling multiples thanks to higher blood pleasure or nervous endings. _The neck, for example_ , Jensen thinks as he stops kissing down Jared’s skin for a second just to lick it instead. Jared tenses up and lets out another strangled moan.  
  
 _More, more, more._ It’s all Jensen can think in his head as he licks all the way down to Jared’s collarbone, leaving a wet trail of spit behind. More of Jared reacting to Jensen’s touch. More of him making those pleased sounds. More of the salty taste of Jared’s skin on his tongue. Jensen will lick every inch of his body if Jared allows it.  
  
Jensen knows about sex just for the same reasons he knows all the other details about the human body. It all comes from research. But of course his knowledge is mostly about the basic steps, he doesn’t know it like Jared, who understands it as more than a definition in a dictionary. Jensen knows that reading about heart surgery is not the same as performing one.  
  
Yet he guesses he can apply the few things he learned from the books.  
  
Jensen moves back up on Jared’s neck, kissing over one of the beauty marks on the skin. He really loves Jared’s moles. Jensen kisses it once, twice. Three times. And one second later, he bites carefully on the skin, starting to suck around it to bust the small superficial vessels under the skin _. A love bite_ , if Jensen remembers correctly.  
  
Jared, on his part, throws his head back and moans harder that he has done so far as soon as Jensen starts to nibble a suck on the skin of his neck. Once Jensen thinks he’s done, he pulls back, watching his masterpiece proudly. Jared’s neck has a dark red circle on his skin now, which will probably get even darker as time passes.  
  
“Jesus, you even know about giving hickeys?” Jared breaths out, moving one hand up to touch his neck. Jensen smiles proudly. “Do you know you usually give them to someone to mark them up? Like a prove that you were _there_ and others will know what you did.”  
  
That part Jensen did not know. His smile grows as he watches Jared touch his neck. Logically nobody will really see Jared since he’s hiding most of the time, but it doesn’t matter. The possessive concept behind it is more than enough.  
  
“Then I should give you many more.” Jensen announces, leaning down to kiss the other side of Jared’s neck as Jared laughs and hugs him back in return, throwing his head back to give Jensen more space to work.  
  
In between making out, hickeys and learning that Jared seems to like the biting part of the process, they end stumbling into Jensen’s room. Jensen is discovering that keeping up with time and space is really hard once he has his hands and mouth all over Jared. It could have been two minutes or two hours since they started and he wouldn’t be able to tell. The entire Universe stopped existing as soon as Jensen could kiss Jared again.  
  
By this point, Jared is done letting Jensen get all the fun, already unbuttoning Jensen’s shirt as they go into his room, kissing a little bit more desperately than before. Jensen gets rid of the shirt as soon as Jared is done opening it, throwing it to the floor. Jared slides his hands up and down Jensen’s chest, licking his lips while staring at him in a way that makes Jensen’s dick start to harden in his pants.  
  
“So, did you try at all what I told you?” Jared inquires with a little smile, pushing Jensen so he will lose his balance and fall back onto the bed. Jared moves close until he’s crawling onto the bed as well, sitting on Jensen’s lap. “Did you enjoy the best thing about the human body?”  
  
Jensen grabs one of Jared’s wrists, bringing up to his mouth so he can kiss the inside of his palm, nodding along while he looks at Jared in the eye.  
  
“Only felt good when I thought about you.”  
  
Jared falls silent at that, eyes a little wide. Jensen wonders if maybe that’s wrong, if it’s inappropriate to tell that to Jared or to even do it in the first place. Maybe he shouldn't have the image of Jared in his head every time he gets off. It's true that the process only feels really pleasant whenever Jensen thinks of Jared. And by now Jensen has gone as far as to not only imagine Jared’s smile or think of his voice, but also fantasize about Jared touching him back, wrapping his fingers around Jensen’s dick and getting him off.  
  
“Jesus fucking Christ.” Jared breaths out, moving on his lap to straddle Jensen instead and lean down so they are face to face. “You say you haven’t done this before but that’s— _fuck_ , that’s so hot.” Jared mumbles against Jensen’s lips. “Tell me what you thought about, please.”  
  
Jensen is glad to hear Jared finds his fantasies hot rather than weird, and he’s sure he won’t be able to deny Jared anything at this point. Not with Jensen half-naked, half-hard and with Jared sitting on his lap.  
  
“At first it was just your face. How you look when you smile or when you’re happy. That made me hard the first time I tried it.” Jensen explains and Jared whines softly against his lips, nodding along as he starts to kiss Jensen’s neck, encouraging him to keep going. “But then thinking of you _with_ me, you _touching me_. It made everything feel so much better.”  
  
Jared bites down onto Jensen’s neck in that moment, pulling a pleased groan out of him. It hurts but also feels good. Jared kisses over the same spot a couple times, wanting to make the light pain go away before he moves up, going all the way to Jensen’s left ear.  
  
“You got a taste of how jerking off felt like. All while thinking about me.” Jared whispers, licking around Jensen’s earlobe. Jensen grabs onto Jared’s hips instantly, holding him in place and nodding. “Let me show what comes next.”  
  
Jensen has no clarity of what Jared means or what he’s doing when he sits up again. It's not until Jared is kissing down Jensen's stomach while opening his pants and pulling down the zipper that Jensen thinks he gets the idea.  
  
Again, it all comes from basic information and this part wasn’t detailed at all. Just one word as the definition and it didn’t tell Jensen much, but it seems like he’s about to get the real meaning of what his anatomy book described as _fellatio_.  
  
“Jared.” Jensen breathes out, looking down and brushing Jared’s hair out of face while Jared keeps on gown lower and lower with his kisses, pulling down Jensen’s pants and leaving him only in his underwear. Jensen is hard by this point, bulge obvious now that Jared’s face is almost pressed into his crotch. All Jensen knows is that the whole thing is insanely arousing. Humans really knew what they were doing once they added all these steps to sex. “Are you going to—”  
  
“No talking.” Jared whispers, bringing one finger up to his lips while making a shushing sound. Jared's face is still red but Jensen assumes is for a different reason and not because of the previous crying anymore. “I can’t answer with my mouth full.”  
  
 _Full of what?_ Is all Jensen can bring himself to think, not keeping up with the human references or sex talk, but all coherent thinking shoots right out of his head once Jared rubs his dick over the fabric of his boxers. Jensen moans out loud, throwing his head back and taking a fist full of Jared’s hair as an immediate reaction. Sure, Jensen had lots of times to practice jerking off on his own but someone else touching him feels ten times better.  
  
Jared only teases Jensen by touching and rubbing him over his underwear for so long—making Jensen reconsider if he ever felt pleasure before in his life and all of his bodies before—finally looping his fingers on the elastic of the boxers and pulling them all the way down. Jensen blinks up, head still dizzy with what’s going on, yet Jared’s silence and lack of reaction make Jensen push himself up on his elbows and look at him.  
  
All Jared is doing is kneel in between Jensen’s legs—after getting off of his lap at some point, Jensen was too distracted by everything to really notice—while staring at Jensen’s hard cock curving up against his belly.  
  
Nudity is different for humans, it’s a big deal. Jensen has lived among species that don’t use such things as clothes or anything of the sort. It's something cultural and Jensen understands that, so he doesn’t particularly minds being fully naked in front of Jared.  
  
And then, all Jared does is lick his lower lip slowly, face turning so red even the tip of his ears seem to color.  
  
“It’s just—” Jared mumbles when notices that Jensen is looking back at him. “S-Seems like your human body is very well proportioned.” He nods, and bites his lips again. “Good to know.”  
  
Jensen is amazed of how easily something like that can make his ego fly to the skies at the speed of light, a smug smirk appearing on his face immediately.  
  
But once again, all coherent thought leaves his mind as soon as Jared wraps his hand around the base of his dick and then puts his lips on the head. The sensation is something Jensen can’t bring himself to describe, groaning out Jared’s name. Humans are really creative for sex. _Amazing creative_ , in Jensen’s opinion.  
  
Jared takes his time doing it, showing Jensen what he can do and how it feels. He jerks him off with one hand while licking and sucking around the head of Jensen's dick, catching drops of pre-come with the tip of his tongue. Then, he slowly moves his hand away and only uses his mouth, licking up and down and then wrapping his mouth around the head, fitting more and more of it inside his mouth every time Jared bobs his head down.  
  
Jensen, on his part, is a mess. The warm, soft feeling around his dick might drive him insane. It's too much, too good, like every single part of his body is burning but the fire it brings feels agonizingly good.  
  
Not to mention that the visual of looking down and finding Jared with his mouth wrapped around his dick has to be the hottest thing Jensen has ever seen. He moans and pulls Jared’s hair in response, who also moans around his dick, vibrations making Jensen almost think that it's too much to handle.  
  
“J-Jared.” Jensen groans, breathing so hard he thinks is a miracle Jared can understand him at all. “Jared. Stop. It feels—oh fuck.” Jensen curses, trying to find some self-control. He needs Jared to pull off now. “Jared, _Jay_. Come on…”  
  
He thinks that Jared should understand, get what Jensen means by " _stop"_. Jensen had enough practice on his own to know by now that the growing pleasure in the base of his stomach is a big warning that’s he’s about to come, and it can get messy if Jared is—well, doing what he’s currently doing when it happens.  
  
Instead of pulling off like Jensen hoped Jared would, all he does in response to Jensen’s pathetic pleas is look up at him—with his mouth full of Jensen’s dick, _now_ he gets what it meant—and then takes another inch in, using his tongue on the underside of Jensen’s dick, moaning softly as he does so.  
  
It’s the last little push Jensen can stand. Jared moaning while sucking him off, like he’s enjoying it just as much as Jensen. It’s like his mind is melting, overthrown by all the sensations Jared wakes up with him, something Jensen has never experienced before and doesn’t know how to control. He comes with a new moan of Jared’s name, hands fisted in Jared’s hair while raising his hips to meet Jared’s mouth.  
  
And maybe the biggest surprise is not feeling Jared pulling off and coughing, leaving Jensen’s apology hanging in the tip of mouth. Because instead of pulling off to spit, Jensen can feel Jared swallowing around him.  
  
“Oh my—!” Jensen groans, looking down at Jared while breathing hard, watching him finally pull off and clean some of Jensen’s come from his lower lip, breathing even harder than Jensen is. Best damn view Jensen ever had in his life. “ _Jay_. You’re going to kill me.”  
  
Jared looks up, face so red it might be heating up the entire room, and then gives Jensen a little smile. His hair is a mess thanks to Jensen pulling and stroking it the entire time Jared was on his knees. It makes Jensen want to lean down and kiss him more than ever.  
  
But Jensen doesn’t have to go to Jared, because he moves close to lay down on the bed next to Jensen, cupping his face and pressing a deep kiss on his lips. Jensen kisses him back instantly, hungry to taste Jared’s lips and tongue after what he just did. Jared moans into the kiss, happy to comply and opening his mouth for Jensen’s tongue.  
  
“I thought about you too.” Jared mumbles between kisses, pressing his forehead to Jensen’s like before. “That time you walked in the bathroom? I was thinking about you. Had been for weeks.”  
  
The dizziness provoked by the best orgasm Jensen has had so far seems to snap out of him when he hears Jared speak, a warm sensation taking over him. He gets on top of Jared and pushes him against the mattress before he realizes what he’s doing, leaving Jared’s wrists pinned down as Jensen looks at him, heart beating hard in his ears.  
  
“You thought…” Jensen whispers, awe in his voice as he lets go of one of Jared’s wrist to stroke his cheek. Jensen can feel his dick twitch, trying to get hard again, but he knows it’s too soon. He just came some minutes ago. “…about me?”  
  
The idea might keep Jensen with a silly smile on his face forever.  
  
Jared nods, skin brushing Jensen hands as he does so, and Jensen loses all little self-restraint he had up until then. He is kissing Jared a second later, biting and sucking onto his lower lip, hands all over Jared’s chest, sliding them under Jared's shirt so Jensen can directly touch on his skin. It feels soft and warm under his fingertips and Jensen wants nothing more than leaning in and kissing every single inch.  
  
Jensen presses his mouth to the side of Jared’s face, close to his ear, talking as he starts undressing him.  
  
“What did you think about?” Jensen mumbles, helping Jared get rid of his shirt. “Jay. What did I do to you when you touched yourself?”  
  
Jared moans, louder than before, hooking one leg around Jensen and rubbing himself up against him. Jared's hard, of course, unlike Jensen he hasn’t been able to get any release yet.  
  
“Fucking shit. When did you learn dirty talk?”  
  
Jensen blinks, confused, looking down at Jared with a frown.  
  
“Dirty talk?”  
  
Jared covers his face with one hand, shaking his head. “You’re doing it without realizing it. And _you_ say _I’m_ going to kill you.”  
  
Jensen supposed he can ask later. Right now it's not the time for questions. What he wants now is to get his hands all over Jared and put all his clothes away. What matters is that Jared is enjoying it, so Jensen keeps on doing the same. He kisses Jared in between asking all the details about what Jared would think about, what Jensen would do in Jared's head while Jared would jerk off.  
  
Jensen wants to know it all so he can do it to Jared for real.  
  
He has to move Jared’s leg from around his waist just so Jensen can take his pants off, kissing the inside of Jared’s calves as he rubs his hips too.  
  
Jensen’s in the middle of kissing down Jared’s chest, licking over his nipples and feeling them harden against his lips, when Jared suddenly puts his hand on Jensen’s chest, pushing him off him and breathing out _“Oh, shit! I forgot! Be right back.”_ Jensen blinks, watching Jared get out of the bed and sprint out of the room.  
  
What the hell just happened? One second he was making Jared moan and squirm under him and the next Jensen can only see a quick flash of Jared’s attractive ass still wrapped in his black boxers, running out of the room.  
  
“Jared!” Jensen calls out, feeling quite stupid lying alone in bed with a new hard-on and Jared away from him.  
  
“Coming!” Jared yells back from somewhere in the house. _‘Well, you should be’_ Jensen thinks, lying on his side, waiting. But Jensen can’t really make that _coming_ happen with Jared leaving without any explanation.  
  
Jared runs back in the room in less than a minute, throwing Jensen something he catches mid-air, examining up close just to find he’s holding a bottle of lube. Jared crawls back on the bed to lay by his side like before, watching Jensen with a smile.  
  
“You do know we need it, right?” Jared teases, nudging him with his elbow. “I ordered it online some months back when you let me start buying things with your laptop.” He explains before Jensen can begin to ask. “Getting off dry is not that fun.”  
  
Jensen chuckles, pushing Jared away playfully.  
  
“ _Yes_. I do know.” He’s a little embarrassed to admit, but since the first night he got off thinking about Jared, he has done some research about sex. Between two guys. How’s supposed to work, what they have to do, the preparation, things that are supposed to feel good. All theoretical, but it was _something_.  
  
Jensen guesses he was just wishful thinking when he did that research.  
  
“Oh, you do?” Jared arches an eyebrow, amused. “Got yourself a gay porn guide? Do you even know what to do to make me come?”  
  
He starts laughing as Jensen rolls them over the bed, pinning Jared down once again while digging his fingers into Jared’s sides, making him laugh harder.  
  
“I probably know more about it than you do by now, this is all anatomy knowledge, smartass.” Jensen mumbles against Jared's neck, biting over the hickey. “Did your stupid ex-boyfriend _Stefan_ even know how to give you a proper orgasm?”  
  
Jared doesn’t get time to answer, yet he seems amused for a second before throwing his head back and moaning Jensen’s name as he starts to rub Jared’s dick over his underwear.  
  
When Jensen finally gets around having Jared completely naked under him, he finds himself thinking different than he did earlier, stopping for only a moment so he can stare at Jared. He’s beautiful. The curve of his muscles, the color of his skin, the moles Jensen keeps finding everywhere—like the inside of Jared’s thighs or next to his belly button. Jared’s beautiful from head to toe. The most breathtaking sight, even comparable to the thousand starry skies out there.  
  
Nothing can be compared to this, Jared blushing and looking back at Jensen while completely naked and only _his_.  
  
And while Jensen knows the theory, he follows Jared’s instructions when it comes to open him up, using maybe too much lube, but wanting to be sure he’s not going to hurt Jared at any moment. He takes his time fingering Jared, enjoying the way Jared moans and tries to make sense while asking Jensen to add another finger in. It only takes Jensen the appropriate twist to find the right angle for him to touch the exact spot he read about, the one that has Jared clawing Jensen’s elbow and repeating his name so much it seems like Jared could come just like this. With three of Jensen’s fingers inside of him and Jensen’s name on his lips.  
  
“No more, Jensen, please.” Jared breaths out, grabbing his arm while trying to catch his breath. “I want you in me. _Now_.”  
  
Is hard to pretend that Jensen couldn’t come just from hearing Jared say that. “How’s bossy now?”  
  
“Shut up and just give it to me, you silly alien.”  
  
It's hard to resist going all the way in as soon as Jensen positions himself on top of Jared and between his legs, making sure to stroke his dick while his hand is still covered in lube to make the process a little easier. Jensen goes slow anyway, because both literature and Jared say that getting used to the sensation is not easy at first. So Jensen takes his time, just as he did before, he has no trouble waiting if it will make Jared feel better.  
  
And if Jensen thought that Jared’s mouth around his cock was the best he could possibly feel, he had another thing coming.  
  
Jared feels warm and tight around him as Jensen pushes his dick inside, watching Jared arch and moan, sweating and cursing as he pulls on the blankets under them. Best torture Jensen ever had to endure, seeing and feeling Jared like he's doing without pushing his dick all the way in, wanting to make Jared his.  
  
Jensen only moves when Jared gives him a green light, starting slow but then not being able to show too many self-restrain, placing one hand under Jared’s body to hold his lower back as he thrust into him, pulling more and more moans out of Jared as he does so.  
  
He could spend the rest of his life just doing this with Jared—hearing him moan Jensen's name into his ear or making out while feeling Jared hug him and rock his hips. Is too good, too much, even harder to handle than all the previous pleasure Jensen had experienced. I'ss different because Jared is right there, under him, saying his name and clinging to Jensen. He presses his forehead to Jared’s, not wanting to miss any second of it, wishing he could memorize each one of Jared’s reactions.  
  
Nothing ever felt the way this does. And he’s not talking about the physical connection. Jensen means the combination of the incredible pleasure Jared is giving him along with the amounts of endless love Jensen feels for his human whenever he looks at him. Jared wakes up everything in Jensen, fills him with life. Jared is everything, the stars, the moon and every sun in the Universe. Jensen traveled through space without ever knowing he was meant to come find Jared all along.  
  
He glances down at Jared, who hugs Jensen and holds onto him, and all Jensen thinks is that he was born thousands of planets away just for him to cross the space and meet Jared. Jensen looks for one of Jared’s hands as they both start to move out of synch, desperate to feel more, get more out of each other. Jensen laces their fingers together, holding onto Jared’s hand as they look into each other’s eyes.  
  
Jared really is the living prove that everything beautiful is far away. Brighter than any star and the most important thing in Jensen’s Universe.  
  
Jensen feels Jared come first, inner muscles tightening around him as Jensen thrusts into him.  Jared closes his eyes and whines Jensen’s name one last time as he squeezes Jensen0s hand. Jensen looks for Jared’s lips before he reaches his own orgasm, making sure he can kiss Jared right before coming inside of him.  
  
It takes them both a good time to catch their breaths, Jensen’s body still swimming in the sensation of the best thing he ever tried. By far. He places his head on top of Jared’s heart, closing his eyes to listen to his heartbeat. Months ago he did that after helping Jared get healthy, wanting to feel Jared's heartbeat with his hand to make sure Jared was alive. Now is to make sure Jared is real and with him, safe from anyone who could try to take him away. Jensen will never let them. Nothing bad will ever happen to Jared again as long as Jensen lives.  
  
“So…” Jared whispers after a while, stroking Jensen’s hair with one hand while they keep holding each other, fingers still laced together. “Did you enjoy your first time?”  
  
Jensen looks up, watching Jared smile in return. He moves just enough to reach Jared’s face, starting to kiss his mouth repeatedly.  
  
“Indeed. And at the same time I can’t wait for the second time in about five minutes.” Jensen raises both eyebrows while Jared opens his mouth, amused. “And then the third time. And fourth. And then try it again. And again. And _again_.” Jensen announces, kissing Jared’s lips with each pause, making Jared break out in laughter as Jensen rolls them on the bed.  
  
Maybe he’ll even be ready for round two even faster than in five minutes.


	16. Chapter 16

 

—Part Sixteen—  
(Jared)

 

 

  
  
They wake up late into the next day’s afternoon. It was already two in the morning once Jensen got home and then Jared has no idea until what time they stayed up. All he could count was how many times they went at it, with Jensen wanting to practice this newly discovered level of intimacy and Jared more than happy to help him.  
  
At one point Jared hears Jensen take the phone in his room to call work and say he’s not going. To think Jensen used to be a perfectly dedicated healer and now he skips work and takes breaks to be with Jared more often than not.  
  
But Jared doesn't mind tainting Jensen’s work perfect record once Jensen hangs up and curls in bed with him again, arms around Jared’s waist, kissing his temple before they fall asleep once again.  
  
Jared drifts in and out of sleep for the next hours, wanting to stay there and be lazy in bed with Jensen for as long as possible. Jensen insists on making breakfast in between slow lazy kisses but Jared only groans his complaints, tangling their legs together and telling Jensen he can’t leave.  
  
He changes his mind half an hour later when his stomach starts to make loud noises, calling for food. Thankfully, breakfast in bed exists and Jensen doesn’t take that long cooking.  
  
They stay in bed the rest of the afternoon, Jared lying on his stomach as he eats an apple while Jensen slides his fingers on his back. When Jared asked five minutes ago what he was doing, all Jensen said was that Jared’s back dimples reminded him of a starry sky. So Jensen is currently drawing constellations with the moles on Jared's skin or _something like that_. Jared only thinks is equal parts of endearing and ridiculously romantic.  
  
“So. We kissed, we said cheesy things to each other and then we had sex.” Jared recapitulates, looking over his shoulder to find Jensen, who's still deeply focused on his back. “Are we a _thing_ now?”  
  
That makes Jensen stop, who looks up at him with a smug smile. “A _thing?”_  
  
“Yes, a thing.” Jared insists, taking one of the pillows and throwing it at Jensen, ignoring his mocking tone.  
  
“You know I’m not a human. I’m going to need a clearer term than _“a thing”_. Is that some kind of slang?”  
  
“Oh, bite me.” Jared snickers, rolling his eyes, just to then yelp loudly when he feels Jensen actually biting down over the dimples on his back. “Hey! You’re just taking advantage now because you know I like that. But okay, _fine_. Are we together now?”  
  
“Of course we are.” Jensen answers, just like that, leaning down to press a kiss on the spot he had just bitten down.  
  
That’s more than enough to make Jared happy, who turns around again to lay his head on his pillow and enjoy the soft touches of Jensen’s hands on his back. He still can’t believe all that happened in the last hours. Jared has known for a long time how he feels about Jensen, but the more he thought about Jensen picking him over anything else, the most selfish Jared felt. Like he was taking away something Jensen loved too, he has seen the way Jensen would look at the sky and the stars. As a creature who has seen it all out there, Jensen loves space, and Jared couldn’t make him give up something that means so much to him. Jared couldn’t make Jensen stay.  
  
But Jensen said he _wanted_ to stay. With him.  
  
And if it’s really what Jensen wants, Jared will be happy to stay forever by his side.  
  
“I still can’t believe I had sex with an alien.” Jared snorts when Jensen finally finishes doing whatever he was doing on his back, turning around to look at Jensen. “I was quite surprised to realize you don’t have any tentacles.”  
  
Jared breaks into loud cackles a second later, enjoying his obviously clever joke, but all Jensen does in return is put that confused face Jared has grown to love and look like Jared just spat a bunch of nonsense and he’s out of his mind.  
  
“I have no clue what that’s supposed to mean.”  
  
“Of course you don’t.” Jared brings one hand up, patting Jensen’s cheeks. “Is one of the things I love about you.”  
  
Jensen smirks before turning Jared around, easily manhandling him and pinning him to the bed. Jared thinks that for someone who doesn’t practice violence and doesn’t possess any kind of fighting skills, Jensen is really good at bossing him around like this. Of course Jared doesn’t mind. He’s really digging it.  
  
“Oh, really? And what else do you love about me, huh?” Jensen asks as he starts to kiss one side of Jared’s neck, slowly making him melt.  
  
“Many, many things. We would stay here all day if you made me tell you.” Jared whispers in return, closing his eyes and stretching on the bed, happy to just lay there and let Jensen have fun kissing him everywhere—just like Jensen declared he was planning to do.  
  
“What a coincidence.” Jensen whispers in his ear. “Because I also love you, Jay.”  
  
Jared smiles, eyes still closed. “It would be really sad if you didn’t. Because I loved you first.”  
  
That triggers a pointless argument about who loved whom first, like a competition to see who fell for each other faster. Jensen arguments it’s obvious he did since the moment he decided to help Jared when he broke into his house while Jared took days to even speak to him. Jared argues that it was all just Jensen’s normal shifter behavior; he helped Jared because Jensen's nice not because he fell in love at first sight.  
  
It doesn’t take them anywhere but is nice to fake-fight over something so silly that makes them so happy.  
  
The conversation slowly drifts into different topics, some more serious than others too. Jared curls close to Jensen and hears him speak about mortality and how he can live much longer than Jared, but also decide when to let his body grow old. Shifters do that when they find somewhere to call home and stay forever. They don’t live so long out of greed for life, it's only so they have time to find where they belong. And Jensen knows by now he belongs on Earth by Jared’s side.  
  
It would be a lie to say that’s not the most romantic thing anyone has ever told Jared. It earns Jensen a good make out session and a lot of kisses all over his face in return.  
  
“You won’t mind staying with this body forever?” Jared asks, curious. “No more shifting, no more discovering new planets or meeting new species?”  
  
“Jared, I have lived a long life and I have also seen enough.” Jensen answers as calm as ever, taking one of Jared’s hands to stroke his fingers. “I don’t have any interest into going anywhere else and be any different than this. And I have to say, from all the bodies I have had, I like the human one the most because it allows me to be with you and is the one you feel attracted to.”  
  
“Hey, wait a second, you don’t know if I wouldn’t like all your other bodies.” Jared argues with a smile, too happy about what Jensen just said. He leans in to kiss his lips, heart fluttering in his chest as Jensen’s words make echo in his head. “I don’t love you just because you look like a human, okay?”  
  
Jensen chuckles, nodding along, but it just seems like he’s indulging him. Jared nudges him with his elbow.  
  
“I’m serious!”  
  
“Jared, all the other bodies I had morphed into are like nothing you have seen before.”  
  
“Well, why don’t you explain me then? We have time.” Jared leans into Jensen’s chest. “You always tell me about the other planets you have visited, but you never say anything about your home planet. What is it called? What’s the first body you had?”  
  
“Fair enough. I think is because we all think is more interesting to talk about places we have visited than where we come from.” Jensen explains as he starts to stroke Jared’s hair gently. Jared sighs, leaning into the touch. “My home planet is located in the Andromeda Galaxy. It’s called _Asherahlia_.” Jared can’t keep a surprised gasp as all answer, awed about how far away Jensen comes from. As long as humans knew, it was impossible to find life in the Andromeda Galaxy, but they were clearly wrong. The Universe is full of life and they never saw it. “Which means ‘ _constant change for the better’_ in my native language.”  
  
“Very suiting for you guys.”  
  
Jensen only chuckles in return, nodding once more. “I suppose. It’s almost like a compliment in my language. Is something good. There’s nothing better than changing to go to other planets to help and learn.” Jensen licks his lips and hums, like he’s trying to find more interesting things to tell Jared. Like this isn’t mind-blowing enough. “We have one big sun. And it’s violet, so we have violent sunlight. It’s always warm, even our seas are bright purple and always hot once you dive inside. Is really nice to swim in them.”  
  
Jared closes his eyes, trying to imagine everything Jensen is telling him, wishing he could go there and see it on his own. If he could only travel the universe by Jensen’s side, go back to his own planet and learn from it just like Jensen does on Earth. Jared would love to go with him and see how Jensen looked like in his very first body,  
  
“My first body wouldn’t be able to survive here, we don’t breath oxygen.” Jensen mumbles, voice soft and shooting. “We are around four to seven meters tall. And our skin is light blue…” Jared opens his eyes to look at Jensen with his mouth hanging open at the description. “I was around six meters myself when I left.”  
  
“Show off. I’m still taller than you _here_ , which is what matters.” Jared whispers and Jensen digs his fingers on Jare’s sides until he’s squirming and laughing.  
  
“Only by a couple inches but anyway.” Jensen moves one hand in the air. “Doesn’t matter.”  
  
“What else?”  
  
“Well, let’s see…some of our physical features were alike. We have eyes and noses and our eyesight is really good. We can see from miles away.” Jensen keeps on going as Jared tries to put the picture together. “But we don’t have mouths.”  
  
“What!” Jared gasps, turning his head to look at Jensen with a surprised expression. “How do you speak then? And how do you eat?”  
  
“We can read each other’s minds. All the time. That’s how we communicate and why shifters are so honest and trust each other so openly.” Jensen smiles and he seems to be having fun with Jared’s reaction. “You can’t help but be that way when you’re used to hearing what everybody thinks and feels.”  
  
“That’s insane…” Jared whispers in awe. “How can you get used to everybody reading your mind?”  
  
“We’re born that way, it’s normal for us. I actually found it weird to express myself with words and actions the first time I shifted into a new body. I was used to everybody just reading it all from my head.” Jensen clicks his tongue, leaning his head into Jared’s shoulder. “And we feed from the earth. We press our hands like this—” Jensen opens his palm and presses it down onto the bed. “Anywhere on the ground and _Asherahlia_ provides for us. Our planet keeps ups safe, feeds and protects us and all she asks in return is for us to take care of her.”  
  
“Her?”  
  
“She’s alive just like all the other planets, too. They breathe and live with us.” Jensen moves his hand from the bed to rub Jared’s arm. “They are a living being, just like both of us. That’s why we need to treat them as such.”  
  
And what humans never did, Jared thinks, processing what Jensen said. No wonder shifters always thought so badly of them. The way Jensen speaks of his planet is beautiful, nothing compared to what humans did with the Earth. That’s something Jared can at least understand; shifters are curing and treating the Earth in a way humans should have.  
  
“Tell me more.” Jared asks as he nuzzles his face against Jensen’s neck, happy to hear him speak about all Jensen seems to love while feeling him so close.  
  
And while Jensen keeps on talking and brushing his hair, Jared can’t help but feel selfish because right now he thinks that if shifters had never taken over the planet, he would have never been able to meet Jensen.  
  
Jared should feel guilty for choosing Jensen over humanity.  
  
But he doesn’t.

 


	17. Chapter 17

—Part Seventeen—  
(Jensen)

 

  
  
  
  
The next few weeks must be the best of Jensen’s life. By far.  
  
He wishes he could skip his job so he could stay with Jared all the time. It was hard enough to leave him when they were unlikely friends, but now Jared said _I love you_ and the entire game has changed. Jensen doesn’t understand how anyone who has found his life partner can get anything done. _Ever_. How can Tom go to work every single morning and just not be with Mike? The idea of getting out of bed, take a shower and leave every day while Jared stays asleep on bed—which can be in his room or Jared’s, they have been rotating since Jared is really proud of his room and wants them to sleep there too—is basically torture.  
  
But it might be suspicious if a healer who loved his job suddenly decided to quit. And Jensen loves being a healer, he still does. But not as much as he loves Jared. It's that simple.  
  
Everyone at work keeps on teasing him that he looks more cheerful than before, congratulating on whatever is making Jensen stare at nothing during breaks and smile. _If they only knew._ Mike keeps on calling him to find out what happened with the shifter that had Jensen in such a poor state days ago, but Jensen says he will explain it eventually. He lets Mik and Tom know that’s he’s doing much better now, just so his friends won't worry. Mike laughs during the call and whistles before shouting _“Get it, tiger! Go try some of that amazing sex!”_ making Jensen pull the phone away from his ear.  
  
Jared cries laughing when he hears Mike, sitting right by Jensen’s side when he gets the call.  
  
Jensen has to hang up when Mike starts to ask whose laugh was that and if Jensen was already sharing more than his time with the _“lucky shifter”_ who was going to deal with Jensen’s _“anal cranky mood”_ for the rest of their life.  
  
Jared needs good ten minutes to stop laughing about that, mumbling that he wishes he could meet Mike. So does Jensen, and maybe someday, he will. If there’s someone out there who could understand, it would be Tom and Mike.  
  
And during the time Jensen’s not working, all he does is Jared. Figurative and literally speaking. Now that Jensen got a taste of how amazing sex feels with Jared, he can’t get enough. Not enough sex, kisses or anything else Jared has to teach him. It's like an evolution of the relationship they had before, but with much more touching and Jensen constantly repeating how much he loves Jared. The last one is just to see him turn bright pink. Jensen has come to enjoy that too.  
  
For a while everything seems fine. Jensen rushes back from work as soon as his shifts are over, never staying one second to do extra work and never taking files home. He doesn’t stop for the library as often, going straight towards Jared as soon as he can.  
  
That night in particular is pouring like the sky is going to fall off and is later than Jensen would usually be driving back home because Tahmoh needed to exchange their shifts that day. Jensen felt guilty to say no after all the days he has skipped work or asked for permissions and Tahmoh had covered Jensen's patients—as Alona told him—so it would be rude to not return the favor. He called Jared from his office before leaving and told him to not wake him up and go rest, Jensen would sneak in bed once he got home.  
  
They stayed up until really late the night before and then Jared decided to wake up early to cook and clean while Jensen slept in—since he didn’t have to be at work until two in the afternoon.  
  
Jensen parks his car in front of the house, taking a moment to gather his coat and umbrella before getting out, wondering if Jared at least had something to eat before going to sleep. He’ll try to ask him once Jensen gets in bed, but sometimes is so hard to wake Jared up that Jensen also feels bad about disturbing him when he’s so tired.  
  
Unlocking the front door with his set of keys, Jensen steps inside, leaving the umbrella at one side and stepping out of his shoes. As expected, all the lights at off and he can’t even hear the noise of the TV in his room. Jared must have been really tired to go to sleep already, he usually tries his hardest to wait up for him.  
  
Trying to not make too much noise, Jensen leaves his coat by the entry and tip-toes into the kitchen. There are some dishes in the sink so maybe Jared did have dinner before choosing to go to sleep. Jensen could wash them right now, but he would rather take off the wet clothes and get in bed with Jared. He’ll wake up early next morning to clean.  
  
Turning the kitchen's lights off before heading into the dark hallway, Jensen tries to not make noise as he opens the first door. Jared’s room is empty and the bed perfectly made. His room, then. Jensen smiles to himself, thinking that perhaps Jared picked Jensen’s bed because Jared couldn’t wait up but at least wanted to feel close to him somehow.  
  
But Jensen doesn’t make it to his room.  
  
Before he can get close enough, he feels something cold pressing against his back and someone breathing behind him. He freezes, wondering about Collectors for a quick second before he realizes that a Collector wouldn’t get in without permission nor point at Jensen’s back.  
  
And if it’s not a shifter, then there’s only another possible option.  
  
“Put your hands up and turn around.” A voice commands and then pushes Jensen twice on the back when he doesn’t obey. Jensen swallows, raising his hands up slowly as he stares at the closed door of his room. Is Jared okay? Did they do something to him thinking that Jared's a shifter too? A human wouldn’t be able to tell, and they could easily assume considering Jared's living here with Jensen.  
  
He turns around slowly, just to find a gun right in front of his face when he does so. He breaths out, feeling a small deja-vú as he remembers Jared doing the exact same thing months ago. But when he looks past the weapon and towards the person holding it, he realizes this is not going to end like it did last time. He can’t see in the dark that well, but he can tell this man is not harmed nor sick like Jared was the night he broke in.  
  
This human is healthy, he has a gun and he's not scared. Things are not working in Jensen’s favor here.  
  
“Now I want you to tell me where is he.”  
  
 _Jared_. The human do knows Jared is here, Jensen is not sure how they could tell there are two people living in the house but the details are not important. This human knows and he probably thinks Jared is a shifter too, therefore he wants to hurt Jared as well. Jensen is not going to let that happen.  
  
“How did you get in here?” Jensen snaps in return, not even considering answering that question while wondering if he could be fast enough to get in his room before the guy shoots him.  
  
“You forgot to lock the door, asshole.” The guy says and then presses the end of his gun to Jensen’s head. “Now answer the fucking question or I’m going to blow out your brain.”  
  
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”  
  
“We saw his shirt outside.” A feminine voice says further in the black background, taking Jensen by surprise. Unlike his male companion, the girl is not breathing hard nor making any noise, at least not until this moment. “It was drying in the backyard along with other clothes.”  
  
So much for drying now that is raining. But that’s not the point. The point is that Jensen can’t figure out what the hell these two humans are talking about.  
  
“Listen, I don’t know what you want.” Jensen starts, trying to remain calm. “But if you leave now without doing anything stupid I won’t call the Security Division nor the Collectors. Nobody will know you were here, you can even take food from the kitchen. I’ll give you medicines for the ride. But only if you put the gun down and leave.”  
  
“Stop fucking around!” The guy shouts this time, grabbing Jensen by his shirt and suddenly slamming him to one of the walls. “You think I want your fucking charity? You think I need help from something like you? _Answer the other question!_ He was wearing the fucking shirt the night we split up and I want you to fucking tell me what you did with the human who broke in your house!”  
  
Stepping away from Jensen, the human points his gun to Jensen's chest. Right to his heart. Not even shifter technology would save Jensen if he got shot there.  
  
“Tell me where the fuck is Jared or I’m going to shoot you to death!”  
  
Jensen doesn’t get to answer, too many things happening at once.  
  
He doesn’t think he gets time to process the fact that this human knows Jared before the door of his room slides open, lighting up the corridor and letting Jensen finally see the two young humans standing in front of him. The guy has short blonde hair and blue eyes, a gun tightly held in his hand. He’s not shaking nor crying like Jared was that night months ago. He’s gripping the gun and looking at Jensen with enough determination to make Jensen be sure that this human has all the guts to kill him. The girl behind him has brown hair up in a ponytail, skin darker than Jared’s. She's small and petite compared to Jensen and the other guy. Both their clothes look old, dirty and raggedy; the exact same aspect Jared’s clothes had when he broke into the house.  
  
All the humans do is stare back him now that they can see him too, but none of them gets to do anything before Jared is jumping out of the room and standing right in front of Jensen—between him and the gun—with his arms stretched open so he can cover as much of Jensen as possible.  
  
“Chad!” Jared cries out and Jensen watches as the guy steps back and the gun falls from his hand.  
  
The girl behind Chad—who now Jensen knows is the best friend Jared has talked him about so many times—lets out a loud gasp and then covers her mouth, looking at Jared like she can’t believe her own eyes.  
  
Chad stares at Jared too, eyes going up and down Jared’s body, mouth hanging open. Jared stays in front of Jensen like some kind of shield, eyes going from the blonde guy to the girl behind him  
  
After a long time of nobody saying or doing anything, Chad finally moves again. Jensen tenses, ready to kick the gun out of reach or take Jared with him in the room so they can be safe in case. All in the guy does something stupid.  
  
But instead, all Chad does is put both hands on Jared’s shoulders and pull him into a long hug.  
  
  
  


 

—

 

  
  
  
  
They all sit in the living room once things have calmed down and clarified to certain points. It basically feels like one of those human jokes Jared has told him before. _Three humans and one shifter walk into a bar._  
  
Chad and Sandy—whose name now Jensen knows thanks to Jared introducing them vaguely in between rushed explanations right after jumping in between Jensen and Chad—sit on the opposite side of the living room in silence. Jared and Jensen sit on the other couch, all of them with a cup of coffee in front of them and nobody saying a word.  
  
Jensen doesn’t mind silence but this is basically awkward.  
  
Jared keeps shooting nervous looks from Chad to Jensen, fidgeting on his spot and niggling on his lower lip. Chad, on his parts, throws glances at the house before squinting at the minimum space in between Jared and Jensen on the couch. Sandy is the only one who doesn’t seem to find anything suspicious, yet she doesn’t take her eyes off Jensen, like she’s expecting him to do something interesting out of nowhere, like disappear in thin air or pull a bunny out of front pocket.  
  
After all the hugging part of the reunion happened—with Sandy and Chad clinging to Jared for dear life while Jensen offered to go prepare something hot for them to drink and towels for the unexpected visits so they can dry off; an excuse to give them some time alone once he hears them all start to cry—Jared started to explain the entire story of how Jensen had helped him once he broke into his house. Jared talks and talks, barely taking breaks to breathe, stuttering or repeating himself every now and then. He explains about Jensen being a healer, about curing Jared and not calling the Collectors on him. Jared tells Chad and Sandy about them becoming friends and Jared deciding to stay because he couldn’t survive on his own and he wanted to stay here with Jensen after all.  
  
He doesn’t explain the rest and Jensen can understand why. Jared’s friends seem to have enough troubles wrapping their heads around the fact that they are friends at all.  
  
Jared sighs by his side and then turns to look at him, giving him a small smile after taking a sip of his coffee. He looks tired and it makes Jensen want to kiss the bags under Jared's eyes and tell him to go to sleep. But right now might not be a good time for it.  
  
“Oh my fucking God.” Chad snaps then, making everyone turn to look at him. He’s shaking his head, mouth hanging open while he looks at Jared with disbelief. “Really, Jared? With that _thing?_ An alien? Dude. _Gross_.”  
  
Jensen frowns, lost in the sudden conversation, but he’s glad that Sandy looks just as confused as him.  
  
“Jensen is not a _thing!”_ Jared argues back, body tensing on the couch and huffing. He reaches for Jensen’s hand and gives it a little squeeze without taking his eyes off his friend. “Chad! Don’t call him that, I told you his name is _Jensen_ and he’s a _shifter_.”  
  
Chad crosses his arms over his chest and leans back into the couch, clicking his tongue.  
  
“What’s going on?” Sandy whispers, leaning towards Chad, who huffs and keeps shaking his head at Jared.  
  
“He’s fucking the alien!”  
  
Jensen has no clue of how Chad could guess that from the way Jared and Jensen looked at each other, but Jared did say they had been close all their lives. It's almost like Tom knowing how uncomfortable Jensen would be with physical contact the first time Jensen visited.  
  
Sandy leans back on the couch too, looking at Jared with her mouth hanging open, making no comment about it while she sips on her coffee.  
  
Jared turns bright pink and raises his chin in response, puffing his chest out like he’s proud of Chad’s accusation and is not going to feel embarrassed about it. Jensen squeezes his hand in return, throwing Chad a dirty stare. What a douchebag, just like Jensen guessed when Jared fist spoke about him.  
  
“I’m doing more than have sex with Jensen.” Jared speaks trough his teeth, looking at Chad, who squints again in return.  
  
“Elaborate, Padalecki.”  
  
“Agent J and Laura in Men in Black II.”  
  
Jared might just have spoken into another language for all Jensen knows. Chad, on the other hand, seems to have gotten every part of that reference because he mouths _“oh shit”_ and doesn’t say anything else, eyes wide as he stares at the carpet. And then, nobody adds anything for another two awkward minutes.  
  
There’s more fidgeting on Jared’s part as he waits for Chad’s answer, with Sandy and Jensen glancing at each other every now then, feeling like they are both witnessing a conversation they shouldn’t be part of. And they aren’t. This is all human-best-friends talk going down, so Jensen is happy to just sit there and hold Jared’s hand.  
  
Finally, Chad clicks his tongue and looks back at Jared, expression hard to read.  
  
“So…” he trails off and arches one eyebrow. “How many tentacles?”  
  
“Not a single one.”  
  
They both stare at each other with a serious expression and then Jared and Chad break into loud laughter at the same time. Jared throws his head back before turning around to press his face on Jensen’s arm, muffling his cackles while Chad holds onto his stomach, laughing with the exact little shit laugh Jensen imagined he would have. Even Sandy is chuckling now, looking down to her lap and trying to cover her smile with one hand.  
  
“You know, I still don’t get what’s with that tentacle joke.” Jensen mumbles and it makes Jared laugh harder and Chad almost howl on the couch, absolutely losing his mind like Jensen said the funniest thing on Earth.  
  
“I’ll explain later.” Jared whispers between laughs, cleaning some of the tears from the edge of his eyes before pressing a kiss to Jensen’s cheeks.  
  
Things seem to completely change from that moment, awkward silences gone and Chad behaving like he has been coming around to hang with Jared and Jensen for weeks now, placing his shoes on the coffee table and acting like he’s in his own house. Sandy seems more relaxed too, but at least she behaves.  
  
They explain how the night they were all running away, Chad and Sandy could escape from the Collectors and go back to the old factory Jensen already knows about. Jared has already told him about the survivors' group he stayed for almost a year with and it blows Jensen’s mind that such a large number of humans was living so close to Dallas without anybody realizing. Chad says that he told everything to Jeffrey Dean, Chris and Adrianne when they were back and Jeffrey decided they had to move, the idea of staying too dangerous after Jared got caught so close to their refuge. Jared’s friends tried to argue about going back to look for Jared but everyone kept telling them it wouldn’t do them any good. They would never find Jared and it was more than probable than Jared was connected inside a Facility already.  
  
“But I wasn’t about to leave my best friend here. Fuck that.” Chad groans, frowning as he keeps on talking. “So we made a plan with Sandy.”  
  
“The group moved and we went with them, but some weeks ago we drove here instead of going for provisions.” Sandy explains as she now munches on the cookies Jensen brought for them. “Adrianne is going to murder us when she finds the note we left.”  
  
“You’re going out for provisions now?” Jared asks, looking worried.  
  
“We had to. It was part of an ongoing plan.” Chad adds. “We had to get a car to come back, and only the ones in the group who go to the cities for food get the keys.”  
  
“We left the car were they used to keep it when we lived in the factory, by the railway in that forest where they found you.” Sandy explains and Jared nods in return. “We left a note telling Adrianne that if we didn’t come back in a month they should come get the car and not look for us.”  
  
“You guys…” Jared whispers and even Jensen has to admit he’s touched too. They risked themselves just come looking for Jared without any clue of where to find him.  
  
“We knew you were still alive, Jared.” Sandy smiles at him and then blows him a kiss. “That night we had to split up because I passed out and you ran away to distract the Collectors and get them away from us. You’re our friend, we couldn’t leave you alone.”  
  
That’s when it hits Jensen. They are here to take Jared back, bring him to their new refuge now that they know he’s alive. That has been their mission all along. He glances at Jared, who looks thoughtful.  
  
Jensen loves Jared with everything he is, but he would never keep him around against his will. If Jared wants to leave with his friends, Jensen won’t get in his way. Just try to make sure he’s safe and healthy, but not force Jared to choose him instead.  
  
“But I’m not alone now.” Jared finally says, turning to look at him with a smile. “I will never be alone again, I’m with Jensen.”  
  
He smiles to Jared in return, feeling like his heart could burst out of his chest at any second. Chad makes a gagging noise in the background, mumbling something about not buying a ticket for a romantic-comedy movie. Sandy slaps his arm and whispers _“stop that”_ but Chad only gags louder than before. Jared chuckles, turning his head towards them.  
  
“And you guys don’t have to be alone to either! Maybe you can—” and then he stops, turning to look at Jensen while he nibbles on his lower lip.  
  
“They can stay if they want to.” Jensen clarifies in case that’s what Jared is worrying about. If it means Jared staying, then he can move all the group of survivors in here if that’s what it’s necessary to make Jared happy.  
  
“Really? Jensen, you’re the best!” Jared cheers, throwing his arms around Jensen’s neck and pulling him into a kiss right in front of his friends.  
  
This time Chad makes a gagging noise for two minutes straight, yelling for them to get a room.  
  
It’s already late but there are some restaurants that deliver until midnight, so Jensen orders a pizza on the phone and shoos all the three humans to the kitchen when the delivery boy gets there. The guy makes light chat with Jensen for good five minutes before finally leaving, and when Jensen goes back into the kitchen Jared is in the middle of explaining how shifters don't have to pay for anything.  
  
Chad and Sandy devour the pizza and is a good thing that Jensen wasn’t that hungry himself. He swears Chad is actually about to tear up, mumbling something about not being able to eat anything like this in years and thinking he just saw heaven.  
  
Jared and Jensen fix Jared’s room for Chad and Sandy, getting an extra mattress in there along with pillows and blankets. Jared gives them a quick tour through the house and Jensen clarifies they are welcome to eat anything in the kitchen and use the bathrooms if they want to, even take showers or watch TV. The only two rules are that they can’t go out or move the windows from screening mode because the neighbors will see them. And second, they have to put the gun in one of the closets and leave it there.  
  
That’s where Jared’s rifle has been all along.  
  
Chad seems against letting go of his weapon, but a quick chat with Jared makes him give up and hand him the gun along with a knife, looking defeated as he goes sit on the extra mattress on the floor. Jared offers them to change into some of his clothes if they want to and wishes them a good night, sharing long hug with each of his friends before closing the door and going to Jensen’s room.  
  
“Thank you so much for this.” Jared says as he gets in bed, only wearing one of Jensen’s shirts. Jensen hugs him by his waist, bringing Jared close by his chin to kiss him softly.  
  
“Of course, they are your friends, Jay. If you trust them then I do too.”  
  
“I want to stay here.” Jared adds, once again making Jensen feel like there’s nothing better in the Universe than being loved by Jared. “I’m not leaving you for anything. But I’m worried about them. I don’t want Chad and Sandy out there.”  
  
“I know, Jay.” Jensen nods along, brushing his bangs out of his face. “We’ll figure it out, alright? I promise. We’ll find a way to keep them safe.”

 


	18. Chapter 18

 

 

 

—Part Eighteen—  
(Jared)

 

  
  
  
  
Jensen keeps his promise.  
  
For the next days and making it up to weeks, Chad and Sandy stay with them at the house, keeping Jared company and learning about everything Jared once did. Jensen does a medical check up on them—he really has to insist for Chad to accept while Sandy is more up to it, arguing that Jensen is a doctor and clearly has made a good job taking care of Jared—and also finds they have malnutrition and dehydration. Jensen doesn’t give them the metallic band he once used on Jared, worried that they will overreact like Jared did, but he does give them medicine and some shots. He also gives Jared the task of keeping them well feed whenever Jensen is not around.  
  
Jared can barely believe Chad and Sandy are there. He's happier than he could imagine he could be now that he not only has Jensen but also knows his friends are safe and right there with him. He keeps telling Jensen he doesn’t want to impose, but Jensen assures over and over again that it’s fine for them to stay until they all figure out what to do.  
  
Chad and Sandy are just as mind blown as Jared once was about being able to have luxuries like a soft, warm bed, a bathroom with hot water and as much food as they want. Especially the food. Sandy doesn’t seem to mind about the boring and perfect movies shifters produce now and Chad sits for days in the living room reading The Hobbit, only stopping every now and then to eat and sleep when it’s time.  
  
It’s still unclear what’s plan from there. Sandy and Chad had planned to come rescue him, but now they know Jared is alright and happy by Jensen’s side. That’s a possibility they never thought. Jared wants them close and safe, not wanting his friends to risk themselves or starve for days any longer. It will a thought decision when they sit and decide what’s going to happen next.  
  
For now, Jensen keeps on telling them they are welcome to stay as long as they need to. Which of course makes him win all the good points in Jared’s book. Every time Jensen is polite and nice to his friends Jared wants to drag him into their room and show Jensen how much that means to him.  
  
They are both sleeping in Jensen’s room now and Jensen doesn’t seem to mind one bit. They can’t be as loud when it comes to sex but they are not taking a break from it. Not Jared nor Jensen want to stop into their ongoing intimacy lessons for the shifter.  
  
So life moves on, and just as before, they figure it out.

Jensen seems to be slowly warming up to Jared’s friends, getting along a lot better with Sandy than with Chad, but that was to expect. He has actually started talking to Sandy about his experiences in other planets and she seems fascinated by everything Jensen says. Jared knows how much Jensen loves telling those stories, so he's glad Jensen has a new crowd to marvel at all he has to say.

And Chad…well, it’s more complicated with Chad. He makes clear that he might trust Jensen because Jared does, but it doesn’t mean he has to like him. At least Chad has stopped calling Jensen rude names like _'that thing'_ and _'space monster'_ and is sticking to call Jensen by his last name, which is somehow progress. Jared really wants his best friend and Jensen to get along. 

Jensen still has his job at the Hospital and all three of them still have to hide, but is not that hard to work around.

  
Things seem to go back to the version of _normal_ they had before, with the house a little more crowded, sure, but they all start to settle down and get used to the new routine.  
  
That week is rains almost every day, thunderstorms every few hours, making Jensen take longer to get to work or come back home every day. The rain has been causing some car accidents, which gives him more emergencies at the Hospital and keeps him away longer certain afternoons. Jared understands it, but he can’t help but sit around and simply wait for Jensen to be back, with his friends teasing him about being a goner for Jensen. He doesn’t really deny it.  
  
Yet the first unusual thing after Chad and Sandy break in happens only a couple weeks later. And is, by far, the weirdest series of events Jared has witnessed since he started to live with Jensen. Nothing like that happened before, which starts to rub Jared wrong since the beginning.  
  
They are awakened at five in the morning when Jensen gets a call from work. Jared groans and rolls in bed, covering his face with one pillow, annoyed at the noise. They try to ignore it for a while, but hey keep ringing until Jensen gives up and gets out of bed to pick up. He mumbles some answers into the phone while Jared tries to go back to sleep, a little pissed that work would call so early in the morning. They already keep Jensen until later, what else do they want? And it’s Sunday. Jensen doesn’t even have to work that day.  
  
He’s dossing off once again when he feels Jensen sitting at the other side of the bed instead of getting under the blankets with him once again. He presses a kiss to Jared’s forehead and says he’s leaving.  
  
“What?” Jared mumbles, blinking and trying to make the dizziness go away. “What do you mean leaving? It’s Sunday, Jensen. Get back in bed.”  
  
“I can’t. It was my supervisor from work.” Jensen explains, yawning as Jared rubs his eyes with both hands. “They need me for something, I don’t know what it is. But they are coming to pick me up in one hour.”  
  
That seems to help Jared wake up.  
  
“Pick you up?” He repeats as Jensen moves around the room to get clean clothes from the closet. “Why? You always drive there.”  
  
“I have no idea. Probably want to make it up to me for making me go work today.”  
  
Jared forces himself to get out of bed once Jensen is out of the shower to keep him company while he eats something for breakfast. Jensen’s supervisor didn’t give him many details, just that they needed Jensen and wouldn’t call him today if it wasn’t necessary for him to come to work. Exactly one hour after the call, a black car stops in front of the house. Nobody gets out of the car nor they go looking for Jensen, simply opening the passenger door and waiting for him to get in. Jensen gives Jared a quick kiss and promises he will make it up for him later for needing to go on a day they would spend together. He wishes Jared a fun day with his friend and then Jared watches him leave in the black car, getting a bad feeling about this in the pit of his stomach.  
  
But it’s probably nothing, just Jared being a little paranoid and not trusting any other shifters. Or that’s what he tells himself at six in the morning of that Sunday.  
  
Twelve hours later with not a single call from Jensen—when he usually would have any other day of work—Jared thinks completely different. He has been trying to be reasonable and not freak out, keeping himself busy by doing anything else. Jared can understand Jensen getting busy, he gets the fact that Jensen is a healer and can’t be taking breaks every hour just to call Jared. Yet, he wouldn’t just not call at all.  
  
He wouldn’t be gone this long either. His shifts are not more than eight hours long. Shifters don’t get anybody over-worked. This is not like the other times Jensen had to go replace someone else’s shift.  
  
And then, something even worse happens.  
  
One of Jensen’s neighbors goes to knock the front door.  
  
Jared, Chad and Sandy are in the kitchen, thinking about what they should cook. Jared knows his friends are just trying to keep him distracted after he already explained his worries about how suspicious was everything hat happened that morning. They never call Jensen so early, they never make him go on Sunday and they never come to pick him up. And Jensen didn’t even know why they were calling him exactly. The whole thing seemed weird.  
  
All three of them stop talking as soon as they hear the knock and a guy’s voice calling Jensen’s name. Jared makes signs for Chad and Sandy to shut up, walking to the kitchen door and taking a quick look at the living room. All the windows are in screening mode so whoever is out there won’t be able to see them. And the door is locked, so they can’t go inside either.  
  
“Jensen!” The shifter calls, knocking twice again. “Jensen, your accommodator has been calling me! Her name’s Danneel, right?” Jared holds his breath, knowing that part is true. “She called my accommodator so I would get to you. Apparently she has been trying to reach you all day but can’t do it! Says she was told you would be at work today but you weren’t!”  
  
It makes Jared’s blood freeze in his veins. He might as well have stopped breathing, heart staying still in his chest as the shifter keeps on knocking and calling Jensen’s name. At the end, the guy writes a note and pushes it under the door before leaving. But Jared doesn’t move, all worry from before multiplying at an alarming rate in his head.  
  
“Jay, calm down, please.” Sandy asks him twenty minutes later, she and Chad sitting on the couch while Jared paces around it, rubbing his hand and pulling his hair nervously. “He’s probably fine.”  
  
“Then where is he?” Jared whispers, more to himself. “This is weird. I knew it was weird, the whole thing…and I didn’t say anything…”  
  
“Jared, you didn’t know.” Chad adds from his spot. “Maybe he took off somewhere else once they dropped him at the Hospital.”  
  
“Jensen is not like that.” He insists, frustrated. “I know him, he would have come back home. This is not normal, something happened to him.”  
  
“Like what? What can shifters even do to each other?”  
  
Jared remembers them, stopping in the middle of the living room while he thinks of the night Jensen took longer to get home and Jared almost lost his mind for one reason alone.  
  
“If they find out he has been helping humans they can make him leave Earth.” Jared whispers, heart sinking in his chest. “He told me that shifters wouldn’t let him live on Earth anymore and they would send the Collectors to get me.”  
  
_“What?”_ Chad snaps, jumping to his feet while Sandy starts checking all doors and windows by instinct before eyeing one of the knives they left in the kitchen. “Jared, are you sure? There could be Collectors coming for us?”  
  
“If they took Jensen, yes. That’s what he said would happen.” Jared mumbles, feeling numb. They caught Jensen. They got him. Jensen said he wouldn’t want to travel again, finding home there on Earth by Jared’s side and now he’ll be forced to leave because of his fault.  
  
“Then we have to go!” Sandy gasps, standing up like Chad, ready to get into action. “We have to leave before they get here!”  
  
“No.” Is all Jared answers, staring down at nothing while remembering everything Jensen said the night they got together. You’re my human and I’m not going anywhere. They are going to force Jensen to leave him and Jared won’t be able to ever see him again.  
  
“Jared!” Sandy grabs him by his shoulders, shaking him out of his thoughts. “Snap out of it, please! If those things are coming for us next we have to leave!”  
  
“I’m not going anywhere.”  
  
“Have you lost your mind?” Chad asks next, coming to grab one of Jared’s wrists, starting to pull him towards one of the rooms. “Jared we can’t stay here, it's too dangerous! If what you’re saying is true then Jensen might be long gone by now and we’re next. Let’s move!”  
  
“No!” Jared shouts, pulling away from Chad and making him let go of his wrists. “Chad, I’m not leaving Jensen behind! I love him, I have to go find him!”  
  
Chad groans, leaning into the wall and rubbing his forehead with one hand, breathing hard. Sandy keeps on giving Jared pleading eyes, but there’s no way Jared can just take his things and leave. Chad’s wrong, if they have Jensen, he would find a way to let Jared know. If it was too late he would at least warn Jared so he can escape from the Collectors. Which means Jared still has a chance to set things right.  
  
“Alright, then.” Chad huffs at last, crossing his arms. “What’s the big plan to go save your space boyfriend?”  
  
“Chad!” Sandy calls out, looking desperate. “Not you too! I like Jensen just fine but we can’t stay here like an easy prey!”  
  
“He’s not leaving.” Chad points at Jared and licks his tongue, shaking his head. “Look at him, he’s fucking in love and shit. I can’t just go knowing he’s here in risk. I already left my best friend once and I’m not doing it again.”  
  
Sandy looks at both of them nervously, rubbing her hands and brushing her hair out of her face. Finally, she gives up just like Chad did, letting out and stressed sigh and rubbing her face.  
  
“If we die because of you two I’m going to kill you in the afterlife myself.”  
  
The so called "plan" doesn’t have that much participation from Jared’s friends on the other hand. He doesn’t want to get them at risk and they have never been outside around of shifters like Jared did for his birthday. Sure, he had Jensen with him the whole time but he remembers all the rules and even knows parts of the made-up story Jensen made for him. Jared has a fake shifter back-story if someone asks him for any reason whatsoever. Jared knows many stories of the planets Jensen has visited but is not enough to make stories for Chad and Sandy too. Besides, he needs them to stay home in case anything happens so he can call them. Chad is against the plan from start to end but Jared’s constant begging and explaining of why they can’t tag along seem to convince him at the end.  
  
Chad tries to make Jared take one of the guns in the closet at the end of the hallway, but Jared refuses. He remembers what Jensen said. Shifters can tell humans apart from their behavior. Carrying a weapon with him would be a red flag, he won’t do it.  
  
“I know where Jensen works, he showed me the hospital. All I have to do is go in and ask for him, maybe he hasn’t answered Danneel because he’s so busy.” Jared explains as he takes one of the jackets Jensen got him for his birthday and an umbrella too. “If he’s not there then something bad happened and I’ll ask someone there to point me out to the nearest travel station where they probably took him.”  
  
“And then what?”  
  
“I’ll figure how to get him out of there.” Jared shrugs nervously, not going that far along in his plans yet.  
  
“That’s a stupid idea.” Chad sighs.  
  
“Do you have any better?”  
  
“Yeah! Take the fucking guns!”  
  
No, Jared won’t take them.  
  
Chad and Sandy should have them in case Jensen has been taken away, which would mean Collectors could be on their way there. He hugs both his friends and promises he’ll be back, but they all know is a broken promise already because Jared can’t be sure of that. Chad tries to talk Jared into letting them go to one more time, but Jared just hugs him harder and tells him that he never understood how he got such a great best friend. Then he lets go of Chad, who gives him a sad smile and nods in return. He gets it. There’s no way he can’t convince Jared not to do this.  
  
Driving Jensen’s car shouldn’t be that complicated. It looked like a normal car, just a little bit more advanced and eco-friendly. Jared had paid a lot of attention to Jensen once they drove around the city for his birthday and besides, he was an engineer. There’s no way Jared can’t drive the damn car. And sure enough, even if it takes him some minutes to figure it out, he’s out on the streets driving towards the Hospital Jensen pointed out to him.  
  
It takes longer than he expected before of the rain, a storm pouring down harder than all the days before.  
  
Jared swears he got lost after an entire hour of trying to find the hospital, but catching sight of the big bright letters on top of the building make Jared start breathing easier again, turning left so he can go into the parking lot. He takes a minute to put himself together, staring at all the different buttons and screens on the dash and remembering Jensen explaining every single one of them not long ago.  
  
He can do this. It’s for _Jensen_. Jared needs to make sure he’s not just here at work. He remembers all the instructions to behave around shifters, and even if Jared wasn’t supposed to do it on his own, it doesn’t matter now. He will do it for Jensen.  
  
Taking the umbrella and the coat, Jared gets out of the car, slowly walking towards the glass doors at the entry. The parking lot seems to be pretty packed to be this hour but Jensen did say that all the rain have been causing more people to get the flu or any other common virus.  
  
The doors open once Jared walks in front of them, letting him see the inside of the hospital. It looks like the entry of any ER Jared went to when he was a kid and had silly accidents around the house. There’s also a blonde woman typing something on a computer while sitting behind a counter, who looks up and smiles instantly when she sees Jared.  
  
Taking another deep breath, Jared tries his hardest to not throw the umbrella to the floor and run for his life. She doesn’t know, Jared thinks as he walking towards the counter slowly. Like the shifter in the car. She can’t possibly know I’m a human.  
  
“Good afternoon.” Her smile grows when Jared is close enough and Jared forces himself to smile in return. He hopes it doesn’t look too fake. “My name is Alona, is there anything we can do for you tonight?”  
  
Alona. Jared knows that name, he has heard it before. Perhaps Jensen said it on the phone a couple times?  
  
Jared's hands are starting to shake, so he shoves them in his pockets, hoping that the rain outside can mask this as him simply being cold.  
  
“Hi.” Jared whisper, voice low. “I’m Jared.”  
  
Alona nods, encouraging him to saw more. Jared can hear his own heartbeat in his ears, hands starting to sweat in the inside of his pockets. She doesn’t know. Jensen said so and Jared trusts him.  
  
“Is there any reason why you’re here tonight, Jared?” Alona takes the cup next to her desk, taking a sip of what looks like coffee. “Are you sick? Maybe visiting someone who’s hospitalized?”  
  
“Do you know… _healer Ackles?”_ Jared adds awkwardly, hoping he remembers that correctly. Jensen said that’s how shifters called him in the Hospital.  
  
“Of course I do!” Alone answers cheerfully, typing something on her computer. “Do you want an appointment with him? He’s a very talented healer, so I’m not surprised someone recommended him to you. He works from Monday to Fridays during morning and parts of the afternoons. I can give you a card and the number of his office if you would like to—”  
  
“Is he here?” Jared snaps another question, interrupting Alona in the middle of her explanation. Jared can’t wait to get out of there and all he wants are answers. She shoots him a confused stare next, which makes the hairs on the back of Jared’s hair stand up and his mouth goes dry. “I’m-I’m sorry.” Jared stutters and he smiles, digging his nails into his own palms. “I’m his friend, so I wanted to know if he’s here. W-We were supposed to have dinner tonight.”  
  
Alona’s little frown disappears instantly as she smiles.  
  
“You are friends with healer Ackles! That’s wonderful. Between you and me, it doesn’t seem like he has a lot of friends. A little shy, I think.” She nods, drumming her nails on the counter. “But, I’m sorry Jared, like I told you he doesn’t work during the weekends.”  
  
“Not even today?” Jared basically hisses, closing his hands into fists in his pockets. No, no way. Jensen has to be here, is his last good option.  
  
“No, I’m sorry. He never comes here during the weekends.”  
  
“I know that!” Jared snaps then, nerves and worry getting the best of him. “But maybe today—!” He stops when he sees Alona leaning away from him, face seeming just a little bit scared at Jared’s reaction.  
  
Deep breaths, he can’t make a scene. He can’t make her realize he’s not a shifter.  
  
“I-I’m sorry.” Jared stutters again, giving a step back. “The cold is killing me. I just m-moved to Earth and back in _Eonthy_ it was always so harm. And I’m still getting used to this weather and body. I’m very sorry, Alona.”  
  
She seems to understand, not even a little bit distrustful of Jared’s story. Because shifters believe in each other, they never lie. Jensen had been right about it, Jared explained the reason for his apparent bad mood and she believed it right away as she would to any other shifter.  
  
“Don’t worry, we have all been there. And it usually doesn’t rain like this here! Although nothing can be compared to all the suns around Eonthy, right?” She jokes, laughing and Jared joins her with a forced laugh, nodding along as he keeps on stepping back.  
  
“It’s fine. I’ll try calling his house.” Jared mumbles, turning around before Alona can add anything else, mumbling a quick goodbye before he starts walking fast towards the entry. Jensen’s not there, he didn’t come here at all. Wouldn’t he appearing during a weekend make it such a big deal that this shifter would notice it? Jared bites his tongue, trying to resist the sudden need to cry. He’s going to find Jensen. He doesn’t know how, but he will.  
  
Jared almost makes it back to the glass doors when he hears Alona calling for his name while running towards him. He tenses up, holding his breath as he stops just by the entry of the Hospital as he considers about running away this time, feeling like he’s going to throw up the closer she gets to him. Maybe she did figure it out.  
  
“Jared, wait!” She presses her hand to her chest, taking a deep breath and then placing the other on Jared’s shoulder. Jared bites the inside of cheeks until it hurts to prevent himself from pushing her hand away from him. She seems nice but—she’s a shifter. Jared loves Jensen but most of his species still terrify him because of what they can do with him. “I just remembered, earlier this morning there was this big accident two towns away and they don’t have many healers there.”  
  
Jared breathes out, nodding along for her to continue, forgetting for just a second about how scared he is.  
  
“Jensen must be there, I heard they called a lot of healers to go help them. Almost forty shifters were hurt after a bus had an accident leaving Dallas and everyone knows Jensen is the best healer here.” She smiles, tapping his shoulder in a friendly manner. “I’m sure he didn’t mean to cancel your plans, he just must be so busy, probably didn’t have a minute today.”  
  
It’s like his own soul came back into his body, letting Jared breath properly once again. He nods, still tense but showing Alona a real smile before thanking her and turning away. Jensen must be there. He said his supervisor really needed this favor, even if Jensen didn’t know what it was And maybe that’s why they went pick him up, just so Jensen wouldn’t have to drive all the way there when it was all favor. Jensen is the best. They would want him there for such a big emergency.  
  
Jared walks slowly towards the car, holding the umbrella and thinking how he did overreact, but it was justified. Everything looked so suspicious since this morning, Jensen would understand. Jared would have to tell him, Jensen needs to have a story ready for when Alona mentions Jared went look for him.  
  
But everything will be alright, as long as Jensen can still come back to him, they can still deal with anything else.  
  
He’s even a little proud of himself for going out and actually speaking to a shifter on his own. All of Jensen, of course.  
  
Jared’s about to get in the car when he realizes he should probably call Chad and Sandy, let them know things are alright and they don’t have to be worry anymore about running away. It means speaking to another shifter by going into a store and ask for a phone—Jared guesses shifters would let him, after all, they give away stuff for free—but it seems almost mean to not give his friends a break. To let them know he’s okay and they can relax because nobody is going to get them.  
  
It won’t hurt to do so.  
  
So Jared walks past Jensen’s car and leaves the parking lot, crossing the street to the small cafeteria in front of the Hospital. It’s not too packed at this hour, which means not many of them will have their eyes on him. That’s good, the less attention he brings upon himself, the better.  
  
“E-Excuse me?” Jared whispers once he walks in the cafe and one of the waiters looks up from cleaning a table, nodding at him. “Hey, hi.” _Casual, no nerves_ , Jared reminds himself. Not using many words and try to be really polite. He’s going to be in an out in a second. “How are you? I was wonder i-if you would let me use your phone for a second.”  
  
Once again, the rain outside can help mask Jared’s nerves and make it look like he’s just cold.  
  
“Of course, sweetheart.” The woman nods, pointing to the end of the cafeteria. “Right next to the bathroom sign, handsome.”  
  
“T-Thank you.” Jared shutters again and walks past her, going way too fast. He hopes it doesn’t look suspicious. There’s a Hospital right in front of the place, this could be some kind of emergency, right? The shifters in there have no reason to think Jared is different from them. A human wouldn’t even know he could get away with this without a shifter telling him, and none of them would ever believe that a shifter would pick a human over their own.  
  
But one did.  
  
He presses the phone to his face and punches the telephone number Jensen made him memorize the day of Jared’s birthday, taking it as an extra security measure in case something drastic happened. It was a really smart idea, but Jared never thought he would end up using it like this.

  
There are five long beeps before the machine takes the call and Jared hears Jensen’s voice saying to please leave a message after the tone. Jared starts speaking as soon as he hears the beeping noise.  
  
“Chad, pick up. Is me.” He whispers, looking over his shoulder. There are some customers in there, but everyone seems too busy minding their own business to really notice Jared.  
  
A moment passes and then sometimes picks up the phone at the other side of the call but nobody talks in return.  
  
“It’s me. I’m at a cafeteria in front of the hospital.”  
  
“Fuck, you almost gave us a heart attack.” Chad whispers in return, like there’s someone who might hear him all the way from there.  
  
“That’s why I’m calling, don’t worry. Jensen is just taking care of a massive accident they had two towns over.” Jared mumbles quickly, hiding his mouth behind one hand. “Nobody is coming to get you guys, so you can relax. I’m driving home right away."  
  
“Thank fuck.” Chas breaths out and Jared hears him whispering what he just said to Sandy. “Then hurry up and get here. Ackles is going to freak out or something if he gets back and you’re gone.”  
  
“I know, I know.” Jared smiles instantly, happy at the idea alone of Jensen really going back home. He’s not going anywhere, which is a relief Jared can’t put into words. “He won’t be glad to hear about what I did but I…”  
  
And as Jared turns around to look at the door, he stops speaking, heart freezing in the middle of his chest as he sees a group of about five shifters dressed in white uniforms he has seen many times before. Usually when he has been running out of his life. One of them makes a sign to the waiter who let Jared use the phone, calling her by her name. There are three guys and two girls, all of them sitting around one table to eat together.  
  
Now Jared wants to throw up everything he has ever eaten in his life.  
  
“Jared?” Chad whispers in the phone at Jared’s lack of response.  
  
“A group just walked into the cafeteria.” Jared whispers, pressing the phone to his face so hard it’s going to leave a mark on his face. “ _Collectors_.”  
  
Chad doesn’t need to hear twice.  
  
“Get out of there!” He almost screeches in Jared’s ear. “Jared, _do it now!”_  
  
But Jared doesn’t have the time to follow Chad’s advice. Because the guy who called for the waiter locks his eyes with Jared across the cafeteria and right then, Jared knows he has seen that face before. He can’t point out when or where for a good second, but it can only mean that if he has seen the Collector, then the Collector has seen him too.  
  
“One of them.” Jared mumbles, completely out of breath. “I think one of them has seen me before, I remember his face from one of the times some groups of Collectors have chased us.”  
  
The guy frowns after they stare at each other for a while, standing up from his chair with the clear intention to go towards Jared.  
  
“He’s coming.”  
  
Jared breaths into the phone, fear so high in his system at that point that he doesn’t think before he acts, fight-or-flight instinct taking over him and making Jared hang up the phone before Chad and answer and running towards the entrance of the cafeteria, pushing past the Collector who calls loudly for him, telling him to stop, which only causes Jared to squeeze his eyes shut and run even faster than before.  
  
Pushing the doors of the cafe open, Jared runs into the night, pure fear pumping through his veins as he tries to go down that street. Getting into the car could be a bad idea, it could eventually link Jensen back to him. He has to run and hide, wait for them to leave for Jared to be able to go home.  
  
But Jared doesn’t get to hide or to wait for the Collectors to go away.  
  
And Jared certainly doesn’t get to go home either.  
  
There’s a stinging pain in the back of his shoulder and Jared hears yells behind him. He looks up, up, _up_ as everything starts to get blurry around the edge of his eyes, and the last thing Jared sees are the stars.  
  


 

 

 

—

 

  
  
  
  
What eventually makes Jared wake up is the uncomfortable feeling of being dragged somewhere. He’s being held by someone else, strangers’ hands on his shoulders and arms as they try to move Jared _somewhere_. The destination seems like a mystery, just as much as the general idea of who Jared is and what was he doing before being carried away in the dark. There’s not much in his head to work with, just a growing headache alone with the feeling you get after spending too much time on a boat. Jared’s stomach is in knots and he really wants whoever is carrying him to put him down.  
  
He remembers the stars. Endless dots of white all over the _nothing_ inside of his brain. Stars that shine, that show us the way like a compass would or lets you know the current season by the rotation of Ursa Major.  
  
Because everything beautiful is far away, like the stars. That’s the only thing we can know for sure when we look at them. And you have to travel through space to find it.  
  
_To find what?_  
  
Jensen.  
  
The name making echo in his head causes Jared to snap his eyes open, looking around quickly. There are white and blue lights everywhere and it feels incredibly cold in there. The walls, ceiling and floor are made out of black metal and there are two guys with white coats carrying him.  
  
Jared freaks out instantly.  
  
He screams so hard it hurts his throat, shoving the guy on his right and then trying to kick the one walking in front of them, who turns to hold onto Jared's feet and make him stop struggling. The one at his left brings something out of his pocket, Jared doesn’t know what it is but once the guy tries to aim it to Jared’s neck, he slaps the shifter's hand away, making him drop what Jared realizes is a syringe once it hits the floor. They want to sedate him again. Jared feels the first guy he shoved grab him by his back and Jared starts to throw punch and kicks around, not caring who he hits as long as he gets them away from him.  
  
In the middle of his fight to get free, Jared doesn’t realize they are taking him into another room until a different light hits him in the eyes. Is a bright white light, so bright it has Jared seeing dots behind eyelids before he gets used to it, finally realizing where he is.  
  
Jared has heard of a room like this from Jeffrey Dean Morgan. Rows after rows of humans sitting down, connected to different cables all around their bodies along with a big black tube going into the back of their heads to make the connection to the brain.  
  
The screams become even worst than before as Jared starts to kick and struggle again. Jared screams and screams and then _screams_ even more. Bloody murder, like they are about to kill him. And they might as well be doing that.  
  
Jared is getting connected to a Facility.  
  
He kicks one of the shifters in the face hard enough to break his nose because Jared hears him groan in pain and cover his face a moment later, blood everywhere on his white coat. Jared yells for them to let him go, to get off him. He bites onto the hand trying to cover his mouth and his screams make echo in what looks like an endless room full of humans who are never going to wake up again.  
  
Jared remembers how this thing is supposed to work, the machine they are going to connect him to. It will make him forget everything about the shifter colonization and put him back into a fake-vision of his life before everything happened. He’s going to wake up in his dorm at NYU, abut to go into Osric’s room to have a video game night along with Chad. And this time, Osric is going to be in there instead of Brock.  
  
He will forget Jensen and will never see him again. Jared will forget Jensen even existed in the first place, who he is and what they are now. Jensen will be gone from Jared’s memory forever and he won’t be able to even realize it.  
  
The tranquilizer they shot at him before is still working in certain amounts, Jared feels more tired and dizzy the more he tries to fight back for those shifters to let go of him. He’s weak, he won’t be able to keep going for much longer. And as soon as he gives up, there won’t be coming back.  
  
The sudden noise of an alarm going off all over the place makes Jared recover some sense, blinking away in confusion just before there’s a loud noise just above them, a terrible roar that makes Jared want to cover his ears with both hands and look away. The shifters who had been holding him down all yell in surprise just as Jared looks up, watching pieces of glass fall everywhere around them. Jared brings his arms up, trying to cover his face as he feels pieces of glass fall on his arms and hands, cutting the skin.  
  
And then, he hears a voice.  
  
Jensen screaming his name.  
  
He’s in front of the broken window three floors up, fist still tightly closed and bleeding profusely, making Jared understand that he just punched the glass. Jared’s heart stops, the planet not spinning anymore and any life outside of the Facility completely dying out for Jared. He can only see Jensen, can only hear him. Not even the shifters around him matter anymore, everything is frozen in time as Jared thinks that Jensen’s here.  
  
He came for Jared.  
  
A second alarm goes off and it makes everything start to run again, bringing Jared back to reality as Jensen leans into the edge of the broken window and screams again.  
  
“Jared!” Jensen shouts, voice making echo in the walls just as Jared’s scream did moments ago. _“Jared, run!”_  
  
He doesn’t want to. He wants to stay right there where he can see Jensen, not wanting to lose him from sight. But Jared knows he _has_ to. Jensen probably has to run too after what Jared can only guess counts as breaking into the Facility to look for him. They need to get out of there together and Jensen won’t leave while Jared is still in there.  
  
The shifters who had been holding him seem too surprised by the whole thing, distracted enough for Jared to punch one of them before shoving the other away, squeezing his eyes shut as he starts to run from them, trying to ignore the rows of humans everywhere. Jared closes his eyes and feels his own tears going down his cheek, trying to not look for familiar faces or count how many humans are in there. He’s sure any of that information would drive him insane.  
  
So Jared does as he’s told. He runs towards the first doors he can find, pushing them open just to find himself into a room that looks exactly like the one he just came out from. Human after human, all asleep into an endless lie. Jared forces himself to look away, running in between them as he hears the noises of the shifters chasing him.  
  
He looks for a door, any door, and Jared goes in the next one.  
  
He doesn’t know how many doors he pushes open or at what moment he hurts his leg after bumping into something sharp and metallic. His left leg goes numb right away and Jared can feel something dripping down the end of his pants. Blood. But there’s no time now, he has to push through the pain and keep on running until he can get out.  
  
Jared loses count of how many black doors he goes through and how long his leg feels like it’s catching on fire before he finally takes a breath of the rainy night, leaving behind the bright rooms and the metallic hallways. He seems to have found the back door of the Facility.  
  
Jared limps away from the door, trying to get away while hoping to hear Jensen calling for him once again, looking everywhere.  
  
But the voice he hears next is not the one Jared expected.  
  
“Don’t move.”  
  
Jared turns around with a gasp, holding onto his leg at the throbbing pain he feels by the sudden move, finding a male shifter dressed in the white uniforms that have haunted Jared’s worst nightmares since the colonization started. Jared holds his breath, wondering if he could outrun this guy in his state. It might end like it did after he ran from the cafeteria earlier that night.  
  
“You’re going to come back in there on your own will.” The shifters whispers, raising his tranquilizer weapon. “Or I’m going to have to take you there myself.”  
  
There’s no time for Jared to answer, the noise coming from what looks like a much more advanced walkie-talkie distracting the both of them. A voice comes out of the small object, calling for the shifter in front of Jared.  
  
_“Did anyone get the human?”_ The other Collector ask and nobody answers, not even the shifter who’s pointing at Jared, probably thinking Jared will attack him if he lowers the weapon to send a reply. _“The one who broke in is a shifter, he used a healer identification card to get in. Seems like he jumped out of the second floor trying to escape. He didn’t make it.”_  
  
It breaks down whatever resolution Jared had to escape along with his will to live at all.  
  
He falls to the ground, unable to keep himself up any longer, leg bleeding so much he’s leaving a trail of blood around him. _Jensen’s dead_. It doesn’t matter, then. This is even worse than Jensen going into another galaxy to live far away from Jared. In that case, Jared could have at least known that Jensen was still alive and somehow okay, and even if it broke his heart, it could have meant Jensen being safe.  
  
And now he’s dead for Jared’s fault.  
  
Nothing else seems to matter beyond that. Jensen is gone and Jared doesn’t want to stay on Earth anymore either. He doesn’t want to live in a Universe where Jensen doesn’t exist.  
  
The shifter keeps on pointing his weapon at Jared, who sits painfully on the ground, holding onto his leg as he starts to cry silently. Getting connected to the Facility won’t be enough, that won’t take Jared back to Jensen in the way he wants. Jared is not sure if shifters believe in the after-life at all or if it’s even possible to meet with other species when you cross beyond the veil of life, but Jared can only hope so.  
  
Maybe there will be stars too. Maybe next time he wakes up he’ll be sitting on the ground of Jensen’s planet and Jensen will be talking about all the new stars Jared has never seen before.  
  
Jared grips his hand around the piece of glass in his hand he took when the window came crashing down, looking up at the starry night and thinking about the night of his birthday, the warmth of Jensen’s lips when they kissed. Maybe Jared will be able to kiss Jensen once again if life is kind enough.  
  
Maybe Jared will wake up looking into Jensen’s eyes if he digs the piece of glass deep enough in the correct spot of his throat. He has no idea if it will be painful at all, but Jared guesses he can deal with that. He’s not getting connected to any virtual reality that will make him forget all about Jensen. Jared would rather die with the hope of finding Jensen once again.  
  
If Jensen found him through space, Jared can find him after death.  
  
The Collector gives a step closer and Jared reacts instantly, bringing the piece of glass up to press it to his neck. The shifter gasps and stops on his tracks, looking at Jared with fear clear in his eyes. _Loving all living things_. Even the humans they hunt down like rats.  
  
So the guy stops moving, still pointing at Jared but not coming any closer.  
  
Jared stops staring at him then, eyes fixed on the endless bright dots in the sky as he thinks he can hear Jensen’s voice in the back of his head.  
  
In the last weeks, Jensen heard this one song on the radio, one of the only human songs out there, and the lyrics had meant so much to him that Jared caught Jensen humming them every now and then. _The Moon_ song. Jared had tried to tease Jensen into making him sing it out loud, but all he got was Jensen whispering the lyrics into his ear, following the tune of the song as he tried to draw constellations with the moles on Jared’s arm.  
  
Jared can hear Jensen whisper in his ear if he stares at the stars and thinks of nothing else, a smile growing on his face. _‘I’m lying on the moon. My dear, I’ll be there soon.'_  
  
Closing his eyes, Jared focuses on nothing but the inexistent sound of Jensen speaking in his ear and holding him around his waist. _‘It’s a dark and shiny place.’_ Jared mouths along, unable to feel the wound on his leg or the pain in his chest. Nothing matters now because he’s going to see Jensen again. _‘But with you, my dear, I’m safe and we’re a million miles away.’_  
  
There’s a noise as loud and even more terrifying than the sound of the window breaking back in the Facility. Is a noise Jared has heard before and has always been afraid of.  
  
The shifter screams in pain and he falls to the ground, causing Jared to open his eyes, voice disappearing from his head as he finds Jensen standing under the opened doors of the Facility, pointing at the Collector with what used to be Jared’s rifle.


	19. Chapter 19

 

 

—Part Nineteen—  
(Jensen)

 

  
  
  
  
There’s nothing else crossing Jensen’s mind in that moment, not a single thing beyond the growing thought of protecting Jared. And Jensen will do anything to accomplish that.  
  
The anger has been scratching his insides since the moment he went home and Chad and Sandy told him what had happened, Jared’s call from the cafeteria in front of the Hospital and a Collector recognizing him. All because Jared thought something had happened to him. Jensen breathes out slowly, jaw set as he watches the Collector who was previously pointing at Jared look up at him, ankle starting to bleed profusely.  
  
But there’s more blood on the floor than the one belonging to the shifter, is easy to tell apart because they colors are different. Because shifters blood isn’t red.  
  
Jared is sitting on the floor, a pool of blood under his leg and a piece of something pressed to his throat. Jensen’s nostrils flutter as he takes a deep breath, already making the connection of what Jared would do instead of letting the Collector drag him back into the Facility. Is exactly what Jared did months ago when he was still hurt, taking the bottle of pills from Jensen with only one intention in his head when he thought Jensen was going to call the Collectors.  
  
The idea of how scared Jared must have been again to get the idea of killing himself after being chased down makes the anger in Jensen scream loudly in his head. Jared is hurt. Jared is scared. Jared could have done it if Jensen didn’t get there on time or the Collector tried to get too close.  
  
They tried to take Jared away, dragging him to his worst nightmare and then almost getting him killed. Jensen doesn’t think he can explain the amount of hatred he feels start to consume him from inside as he stares at the shifter in front of him, violent anger roaring for revenge.  
  
Jensen could have stepped out of that door and find Jared lifeless body on the ground instead.  
  
All because shifters can’t leave humans alone. Because they have to hunt them down and take them away.  
  
But they won’t do that to Jared. Jensen won’t let them.  
  
Jensen charges the rifle again, raising it until is pointing to the shifter’s chest, hands shaking just so from the amounts of resentment pumping through his body. Jared was right all along. Everybody is capable of unthinkable things if the situation calls for it. It’s not only humans, is all of them. Anyone can get to this point of they are pushed the limit.  
  
He stares down at the shifter who’s holding onto his knees while looking at Jensen with scared eyes and Jensen realizes he’s going to do it.  
The ultimate horror for his species, something that goes against everything they believe, the opposite of everything they are born for.  
  
Jensen would murder for Jared.  
  
He would finish a living creature and betray his entire race just for one human. And he has never felt more decided about anything in his life.  
  
He hates the shifter in front of him. He hates the shifters who chased Jared down. He hates every single shifter who has made Jared’s life a living nightmare since the moment they colonized Earth. The ones who forced him to go into hiding, the reason why he ended so sick in the first place. Jensen hates like he has never done before and he’s not going to let anyone else ever do this to his human ever again.  
  
“Jensen!” Jared calls from the floor, voice broken. Jensen feels his fingers twitching around the trigger but doesn’t turn around, eyes fixed on the Collector on the floor. “Jensen—Jensen, please don’t do it.”  
  
Don’t do it? How can Jensen not to? They were going to take him away, connect Jared to a facility he would never be able to wake up from. Jensen heard Jared screams before he broke the windows of the third floor. He heard the pain and desperation in Jared’s voice. Jensen will make sure no Collector ever tries to do this to him.  
  
“Jensen.” Jared calls again, starting to drag himself on the floor towards him, unable to stand up because of the wound on his leg. “Look at me, please. Don’t do this. This is not you.”  
  
Yes, it is. This is him now.  
  
“He saw your face.” Jensen whispers, hatred pumping faster and harder than before when he says it out loud. “He’s going to find you eventually. They will put alarms everywhere on Dallas with a sketch of your face. They are going to hunt you down and I’m not going to let them do that.”  
  
The shifter on the floor just stares at Jensen, eyes wide as he looks at a spot on Jensen’s knuckles. He can feel himself bleeding from the cuts on his hand after he broke that glass. The Collector can see he’s not a human either.  
  
“Why are you helping him?” He whispers, so low that Jensen would have missed it if he wasn’t staring right back at the shifter.  
  
Jensen grips the rifle with both hands.  
  
“Because my place in the Universe will be forever by his side.”  
  
And Jensen will kill anyone who tries to get in the way.  
  
Then, he feels a hand pulling on his clothes  as Jared tries to hold onto him, repeating Jensen’s name over and over. But Jensen is beyond listening to Jared, who keeps on sobbing for Jensen to put the gun down. He says Jensen is not like this. Jared thinks Jensen is still good, that he won’t reach the level of violence humans did just to protect him. But Jensen will. He might not be a human, but he’s not a shifter anymore either.  
  
_“Jensen.”_ Jared cries from the floor next to him, pressing his forehead to his leg and reaching up to try to touch him, like he wants to touch Jensen’s hands, but he can’t because Jensen's too far away to reach him.  
  
Jensen changes his mind, raising the rifle so it’s pointing at the shifter’s head instead. Jared holds tighter onto him, shaking his head against his leg.  
  
“You wouldn't do this, you wouldn't even touch a weapon you hate and I'm scared of. Please don’t take away the Jensen I fell in love with.” Jared whispers and Jensen moves his eyes away from the Collector for the first time since he got there, looking down at Jared, finding the hazel eyes staring back at him. “This is not you. I want _my_ shifter back.”  
  
Jensen looks back at the Collector on the floor, and after two long heartbeats, he puts the rifle down and takes out the tranquilizer weapon he stole from another shifter inside of the Facility and out into his healer gown.  
  
Then, he shoots the shifter in the neck, tranquilizer making him pass out instantly.  
  
  


 

 

—

 

  
  
  
  
It's just until they can get back into Jensen’s car and he can reach over to hold Jared’s hand that Jensen feels like he can breathe once again. Jared turns his head on the chair, giving him a smile and bringing his hand up to kiss the inside of Jensen’s wrist. Jensen strokes Jared’s lower lip with his thumb, heart warming up when Jared nuzzles back into the touch, any fear or pain completely gone from his expressions.  
  
Jared’s has a bandage around his leg, under his jeans, the bleeding stopped and wound cleaned with the medical tools Jensen found in the Facility. Other healers work there, curing and keeping the humans they connect to the Facilities healthy, so is no surprise they had what Jensen needed to stitch Jared’s wound, give him something for the pain and possible infection and then cover the big cut on his skin.  
  
But that was after making sure no shifter would go after them. There weren’t as many working in the Facility that night, most healers being called to the same town Jensen had been taken to so they could help all the victims of the car accident. Collectors had also been asked to go help check the perimeter and make sure there weren’t any shifters wandering around lost and confused after they getting head injuries from the big accident. There were three of them still missing when Jensen left.  
  
Jensen used the tranquilizer gun to put out any of the remaining shifters in the building, most of the healers too scared and not knowing how to fight back at all. The Collectors were easily tricked once they saw Jensen dressed like a healer, thinking he was one of the healers who worked there too. There’s one of them they can’t get to, the shifter who Jensen had dodged when they made it to the second floor, getting out of the way just when the Collector tried to jump Jensen to immobilize him, who ended crashing through one of the windows and falling two stores down. Jensen doesn’t let Jared come along when he goes check if he’s still alive, but there’s no pulse when Jensen touches his neck.  
  
With all the rest of them, they find a good way to keep them alive but not give them the chance to describe to the Security Division what happened in there that night and what they saw.  
  
The Facility is designed to keep locked down any human they bring in there, all the connections appropriate for the human anatomy and main connection going directly to the human brain. And all shifters have the exact same qualities to be connected into the VSR, and just like humans would, it’s going to be impossible to bring those shifters back after Jensen makes the direct connection to their brains.  
  
They will be alive and happy in the fake reality they designed, unable to ever tell anyone they saw Jensen and Jared’s faces in there.  
  
And just as expected from shifters, there are no cameras in there. Just like they weren’t in the banned part of the library or any other place where some security could be needed. They trusted healers and Collectors would do a good job and keep the humans healthy. No need for any cameras that could have caught evidence of what went down. Nobody will ever to tell the Security Division what happened.  
  
“I thought you were dead.” Jared whispers, face pressed to Jensen’s hand as they drive back home. Jensen also made sure to stitch his own hand and put a bandage around his knuckles before they left. “They said someone jumped from the second floor, they said it was you…”  
  
Jensen strokes Jared’s cheek softly in return.  
  
“Is that why you had that glass to your neck?”  
  
Jared nods slowly in return and Jensen holds tighter onto Jared, relief that he got there on time washing over him.  
  
“Please don’t ever do that again, Jay.”  
  
“Only if you promise to always stay with me.” Jared smiles against Jensen’s hand, kissing his fingers again. Jensen turns to look at him for a moment and nods, smiling in return.  
  
It’s almost bizarre for him that Jared still loves him even after everything he has done and what Jensen has become. Shifters have no problem loving each other and caring because they are all good to each other, made out of only pure emotions and feelings. But Jensen is not like that anymore, he’s full of all the bad things any shifter would reject. Jensen has experienced greed, jealousy, hate, anger and even the violent need to kill someone.  
  
And yet, Jared still kisses his hands and looks at Jensen like he’s the sun.  
  
Like the Velveteen Rabbit, Jensen became real, because as the book says, _love makes you real_. Now Jensen understands much more of what he thought was a simple kid’s books. It shows the nature of human love and what it means. There’s a quote he still remembers. _‘Weeks passed, and the little Rabbit grew very old and shabby, but the Boy loved him just as much.’_  
  
Time has passed and Jensen changed. He’s not full of goodness anymore, he’s not pure and perfect like all the other shifters out there anymore. Jensen too grew shabby but Jared loved him just as much.  
  
They keep on driving in silence, exchanging reassuring physical contact every now and then, but they are both pretty tired after what happened. The medicine Jensen gave Jared for the pain had to make him feel a little dizzy, so Jensen lets him doze off on the seat while still holding his hand.  
  
It'ss not until they make it to their street, with Jared waking up and them getting closer to their house, that they both notice that there’s a different car parked where Jensen’s car would usually be. Jensen knows that car.  
  
“Danneel.” He whispers, holding tighter onto Jared’s hand.  
  
She’s leaning on her car, arms crossed over her chest as she stares directly at them when Jensen stops his car some meters away from their house. She’s looking at Jared more than anything. There’s no way to hide him or run for it.  
  
“Jensen, what—” Jared starts, tone nervous, holding onto him.  
  
“Stay in the car, Jay.” Jensen whispers in return, opening the door to get out and walk to the other side of the car, stepping into Danneel’s view and covering Jared from her. She arches one eyebrow, expression serious like he has never seen.  
  
“Get in my car, Jensen.” She announces after a minute, opening the door for the back seat. “And bring that human with you.”  
  
Jensen swallows, looking at Jared over his shoulder. They don’t have the tranquilizer gun with them anymore, they left it back at the Facility and it would be stupid to try to do something there, in the middle of his own neighborhood. He nods in Jared’s direction, making a sign for him to get out of the car. Jared opens the door and limps towards him. He stays behind Jensen and throws Danneel scared glances as Jensen leaves an arm in front of Jared, like he’s shielding him away from her.  
  
“Get in the car the two of you.” Danneel points at them, already at the other side of the car and opening the driver’s door. “Now.”  
  
Jared holds onto the back of his shirt and Jensen nods again, keeping Jared behind him as they walk towards the car and get inside in silence. Jared keeps glancing at the house nervously as they drive away and Jensen knows he’s thinking of Chad and Sandy, yet it doesn’t seem like Danneel knew about them being in there too. The house looked normal, not like someone had broken in to take Jared’s friends away.  
  
Danneel drives in silence, looking at the through the rearview mirror every now and then. Jared stays pressed to Jensen’s side while Jensen squeezes his hand in return. He turns his head towards Jared, lips ghosting close to Jared’s ear as he assures him that nothing bad will happen.  
  
Whatever goes down, he won’t let anything bad happen to Jared, and he won’t let him get hurt again.  
  
“I’m not letting they do anything to you.” Jensen repeats, louder this time so Danneel can hear him, implying that things will go down if anyone tries to do anything to Jared. She glares at him through the rearview mirror once again but doesn’t say anything in return.  
  
Jensen is expecting her to drive her to her own supervisor, who will probably decide what to do with them now that Danneel knows one of the shifters she has been an accommodator for has been helping a human. Maybe one of the first shifters who colonized earth, who will take action on Jensen’s behavior. He’s already planning how they can possibly escape with Jared’s leg injury and what they can do from there. Perhaps he could create a distraction for Jared to run away and save himself. Jared’s not going back to a Facility.  
  
And after what feels like forever, Danneel turns right and drives into the backyard of a big white house. It has three stores and it's big enough for it to have many shifters living in there. Jensen tenses up at the idea of dealing with more than a couple of them. The house is not in a neighborhood like Jensen’s, away from any other residencies and surrounded by what looks like a small forest at one side.  
  
Danneel gets out of the car and tells them to follow her and not try anything stupid. Jensen’s doesn’t let go of Jared’s hand as they make it out of the car, still shielding him by keeping Jared behind him. Jensen looks around, expecting to see Collectors coming for them at any minute, yet he can barely hear any noise around them.  
  
It’s stressing him out to not know where she’s taking them.  
  
“Where are we, Danneel?” He snaps at last, holding tighter onto Jared’s hand as they stop in front of what looks like a back door.  
  
She turns her head to look at Jensen over her shoulder and then she flashes him a small smile.  
  
“My house, of course.”  
  
She unlocks the door with a set of keys and then pushes it open, cleaning her heels on a rug on the floor before walking in and repeating for Jared and Jensen to follow her inside. Jensen frownS, confused, as he exchanges a quick look with Jared and helps him walk into the house too.  
  
“I’m home!” Danneel calls after she closes the door behind them, stepping out of her heels and then pointing at the two of them. “Take your shoes off, please. She has this thing about keeping the kitchen floor spotless. You can leave them oN the rug.”  
  
Jensen and Jared exchange another look but do as they are told, stepping out their shoes and following Danneel into the living room, looking around as they walk. It does look like it’s her house, decorated with paintings and flowers. It even smells like someone just burned a scented candle. It smells like cinnamon. The house is as huge as it looked on the outside, everything spotless and perfectly organized. The living room has a fireplace and big white couches in front of them. There are bookshelves everywhere too, filling up the walls close the fireplace and at each side of  TV screen at the other side of the room.  
  
Jensen is about to ask Danneel why she brought them there when they hear steps running downstairs, making Jensen tense up and shield Jared like before.  
  
A girl appears at the end of the stairs a couple seconds later, black hair up in a ponytail and dressed in what looks like blue pajama pants and a hoodie.  
  
“Danny, you took forever!” The girls complains, looking down at the stairs as she keeps coming down. “I told you it was movie night and I already chose what we’re watching for tonight. I made popcorn but it's probably cold already so—”  
  
She stops once she looks up, finding Jared and Jensen standing next to Danneel. Her eyes widen and she tenses up, looking like she’s about to run back upstairs, smile disappearing from her face.  
  
“No, no!” Danneel calls when the girl steps back, walking the space in between them and grabbing her by one of her arms. Then, Danneel puts her arms around the shorter girl to give her a brief hug, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “Genevieve, don’t get scared, it’s alright.”  
  
Leaving one arm over the girl's shoulders, she turns around and points at Jared with one hand. Jensen covers him again but all Danneel does is smile in return.  
  
“He’s a human too.”  
  
Jensen makes an instant double take as he hears Jared gasp by his side, both of them catching what that “ _too_ ” implies.  
  
“W-What about the other one?” Genevieve mumbles, eyeing Jensen but mostly looking at Jared, looking as surprised as they are.  
  
“No, Jensen is like me.” Danneel leans in, pressing a kiss to Gen’s cheek this time. “He’s a shifter who also takes great affection for humans.” Her smile grows and she winks at Jensen. “Just like I do with you, Gen.”  
  
As it turns out, this is not what Jensen was expecting, and they clearly need to sit down in Danneel’s living room to talk about it. She’s not taking them to her superior, she’s not even going to call the Security Division or any of the options Jensen imagined.  
  
It happens that Genevieve has been living with Danneel for a long time, even before Jared and Jensen ever met. Genevieve used to live in that house with her family before shifters took over. One night Genevieve tried to sneak back in the house after previously escaping, wanting to find anything from her family after spending a long time running away. She was alone and desperate to find something to remind her of home and give her some hope. That’s when Danneel caught her.  
  
And just like Jared did, Genevieve eventually decided to stay too.  
  
“What can I say?” Danneel shrugs as she takes a sip of her tea, all four of them sitting in her living room, hearing the story of her and Genevieve met. “I too fell for my own human.”  
  
She smiles fondly at Genevieve, who turns a little pink and smiles in return. Jensen can see himself in that smile, in the way Danneel looks at Genevieve, because that’s exactly how _he_ looks at Jared.  
  
“Jensen.” Jared whispers by his side, nudging him. Jensen leans closer to hear him one arm around his shoulders as they sit on one of the couches. “You think she will let me call home? Tell Chad and Sandy everything is alright?”  
  
“Who are Chad and Sandy?” Danneel asks loudly, obviously hearing Jared’s whisper, who takes a sharp breath and presses closer to Jensen again.  
  
“Don’t do that.” Jensen shakes his head at Danneel, patting Jared’s hand to calm him down. “They are—well, there are another two humans staying at my house. They are Jared’s friends.”  
  
Danneel actually looks at Jensen with her mouth hanging open, shaking her head in disbelief.  
  
“Three humans, Jensen? Seriously?” She repeats, both amused and surprised. “Who would have thought from such a perfect little healer.” She clicks her tongue looking back at Jared. “The phone is right there, honey. Is not like the one Jensen has at home so let Gen explain how to use it.”  
  
Jensen and Danneel move to the kitchen while they leave Jared and Genevieve in the living room, with Jared feeling happy to be able to hear Chad pick up the phone and Genevieve more than excited to know there are more humans still out there that she might be able to meet.  
  
As Jensen explains what happened in the Facility, Danneel doesn’t approve of what he did and the fact that Jensen almost killed someone and caused a Collector’s death—indirectly, but _still_ —yet she understands the reasons why he did it. She would do anything to protect Genevieve too. She also says she can add Jared to the system and make it appear like he’s a shifter who recently moved in to live on Earth. That way he doesn’t have to hide all the time. As an accommodator, she has access to all those files and she already did the process with Genevieve and it worked perfectly. The girl is still scared to go out sometimes and doesn’t like to talk to other shifters much, but that way it’s secured that no Collectors will ever take her away.  
  
And now Danneel can do that with Jared too. They won’t ever have to worry about Jared being taken away. Jensen feels relief shower all over his body at the good news. He can’t wait to tell Jared the good news.  
  
“You think this is happening to other shifters?” Danneel hums, standing in front of the kitchen counter as she makes another cup of tea. “At first, I thought it was just me with Genevieve, but then I started to notice the way you changed whenever I visited. It reminded me of the way I changed too.” Danneel drums her nails on the counter distractedly. “You were finally starting to smile for real. You wouldn’t only care about your job anymore and you would behave strange when I was around, like you were hiding something.”  
  
Jensen thought he had been doing a great job pretending everything was normal, but it doesn’t seem that way. At least he’s grateful only Danneel seemed to notice.  
  
“And then, of course, the fact that today I called Alona again tonight after trying to locate you all day and she told me a friend went looking for you at the Hospital.”  
  
Jensen turns to look at her, arching an eyebrow. “How is the last one relevant at all?”  
  
“Please, Jensen. You kept naming your two friends to get me off your back about not being as social whenever I visited.” She rolls her eyes. “If you had another shifter friend apart from Tom and Mike, you would have made sure to mention it months ago.”  
  
Jensen huffs, hiding a laugh as he shakes his head.  
  
“I don’t know if there are more shifters like us and honestly? I don’t care either.”  
  
All he cares for is Jared. What all the other shifters do is on them. Jensen just cares for his human.  
  
“They are something special, aren’t they?” Danneel asks as they watch Jared and Genevieve talk in the living room. “Jared must be for sure just by the way you look at him.”  
  
Jared chooses that moment to turn around and look towards the kitchen, smiling big and happy at Jensen when they eyes meet in between the rooms.  
  
 “Yes, he is.” Jensen answers, smiling back and feeling the smile reach every part of his human body.  
  
Now he knows that sometimes everything beautiful is far away, but it also has its exceptions. That’s what Jensen thinks later that night as they leave Danneel’s house, holding Jared’s hand and watching him look up at the sky.  
  
Jared leans his head on Jensen’s shoulder as they walk slowly towards Jensen’s car and Jensen presses a light kiss to Jared’s soft lips. Jared smiles in return and then kisses him back. It makes Jensen’s heart flutter.  
  
_Sometimes everything beautiful is far away, and some others, it’s right across from you._ Jensen holds tighter onto Jared’s hand as they walk side by side into the starry night.  
  
_And when you find it, nothing else matters in the Universe._

 

 

THE END

 

 


End file.
